How to "treat" homosexual relative

[mikew262]

Other Eric:

The Catechism warns only against unjust discrimination. Given the predatory nature of such individuals, I see nothing unjust about my advice at all.

You think this is what Jesus would’ve advised? I think not.

 

[fix]

Celeste88:

Good point. And WWJD? Did He not hang around prostitutes, tax collectors, lepers and sinners?

He "hung’ with them to lead them to repentence. He called them to conversion.

 

[Orionthehunter]

michele2:

if you love your husbands brother,you must embrase him, and be glad for him, Truly he is only following his natural emotions. Is he not a creation of God, and is not the creations of God perfect, he is a child of God, and since God created him this way, what evil can there be; but only in the minds of evil people. in aur belief that we are right, we tend to destroy all that , which we do not understand. Have compassion.

How would react if you discovered one day that your son was Homsexual.

God did not make him this way. The Church is clear that homosexuality is a disorder and its practice is a sin. He was made “very good” and it is sin that corrupts us. He is a victim of his sin and the sin around him in this culture. With God’s grace and dedication of his God-given will, he can overcome this disorder.

This being said, we need to love the sinner and hate the sin. Embrace his personhood and don’t condone his behavior.

 

[MikeinSD]

I find it gratifying that most posters here are asking that gay men be treated with respect by their families. I was not treated with respect by my family and I’m afraid it cause hard feelings among family members. I will not go into particulars but the “devout” Christians ended up hurting perceptions of their religion and turning off families’ teens. I hope we all learn to tolerate each other.

ladyjayes.com/harpervalley.html

 

[contemplative]

MikeinSD:

I find it gratifying that most posters here are asking that gay men be treated with respect by their families. I was not treated with respect by my family and I’m afraid it cause hard feelings among family members. I will not go into particulars but the “devout” Christians ended up hurting perceptions of their religion and turning off families’ teens. I hope we all learn to tolerate each other.

ladyjayes.com/harpervalley.html

…this is the pay-off when a homosexual demands ‘respect’ in his/her family.
Your story is proof positive of how destructive the homosexual agenda is. Thanks for sharing.

The homosexual/gay agenda tears at the very fabric of families. It is a terrible plague.

The devil is having a field day in families these days.

God help us.

 

[Wondering_Waif]

Other Eric:

The answer is simple. Cut this man completely out of your life and the lives of your children, whom it is your responsibility to protect. In the Church at large, excommunication is a compassionate act of correction. The same will be true of alienating this man from your family.

That’s crazy and close-minded.
As for excommunication, it doesn’t wipe out the fact that both of these men were baptized and are still God’s children-so it’s not that easy or well understood.
The way she treats these guys will be copied by her children, she has a real spiritual dilemma and your easy, NO WAY OUT, response is not helping.
Should Phyllis Schafley disinherit her Gay son?

 

[marymol]

" If your eye leads you to sin, pluck it out …
it is better to enter heaven …"
Epitle of Jude -‘Sodom , Gomorroh and the surrounding towns…serve as an example …These people …are destroyed by what theyknow by nature like animals …They are blemishes on your love feasts …
save others by snatching them from the fire… have mercy with fear,hating even the tunic stained by their flesh…’
St. Paul -Rom. 16-16 -“watch out for those who create obstacles …in opposition to the teaching you learned …avoid them…” and so on …any # if instances through OT and NT of real Mercy ,spoken in truth; a source of pain where there has been sin … , yet hopefully would lead to repentance …
How do you ‘speak’ that truth - pretending nothing has changed would not do …he / they are destroying the dignity of The Father image of every man that our Lord came to reveal to us … women are here to bring glory to that Father image in man - by showing our respect , to the fathers , future fathers …(and to help to ward off any enemy ploys that come to destroy that dignity )…which in turn reinforces our own dignity …
Somehow some where all this has been distorted / destroyed , in many lives . . Sharing how much it hurts you to see what they are doing …( ? email contacts, in the beginning - since it might be difficult to talk it out openly …) how you would like to help , as you already are doing …that would seem to be mercy and love spoken in truth…
Homosexuality is thougt to have a component of Father hunger
that make men want to seduce other men for power and control and also envy/ anger/ unforgiveness towards women/mothers that make them want , to compete with them ( Reverse these - and you have the bondage of lesbianism )
The CURE - an intense program , SPIRITUAL BATTLE ,( just like that of any cocaine/ alcohol addict or ? worse ) - of fasting, EUCHRISTIC ADORATION , to receieve the FATHER LOVE in The Lord ( that they too like St. JOHN, who as the youngest disciple, even as as he also was the’ son of thunder ', could relate the best to this Father Love in the Lord and thus become the beloved disciple …SEE THE FACE OF THE FATHER… and heal The Father wound … Rosary devotion., be in the arms of Mama … Intense Scripture Studies nothignlg ike it to purify and strengetehn our hearts and minds …all those OT wars …heroism …( Bet the priest probably had lost his faith, love for all these and led many others in the destructive path of lukewarmness or worse …) even some diet modifications …(Please refer to the one on NFP - what is my hus. thinking - also a good thread to see the struggles of even married ones , to remain chaste …)
Tell him/ them that the most loving thing you would like to offer would be - to keep them company /support in the above …
But pretending like nothing is wrong , would be almost like the Levite who see the wounded man on the street and crossing to the other side …they need to be taken to THE INN…
and the hope '-When you have turned back, strengthten your brethren ’
God Bless!

 

[Wondering_Waif]

MikeinSD:

I find it gratifying that most posters here are asking that gay men be treated with respect by their families. I was not treated with respect by my family and I’m afraid it cause hard feelings among family members. I will not go into particulars but the “devout” Christians ended up hurting perceptions of their religion and turning off families’ teens. I hope we all learn to tolerate each other.

ladyjayes.com/harpervalley.html

Everyone deserves respect, if your family was too afraid to love you I’m glad that you know Jesus Who does.

 

[Wondering_Waif]

" If your eye leads you to sin, pluck it out …
it is better to enter heaven …"
Epitle of Jude -‘Sodom , Gomorroh and the surrounding towns…serve as an example …These people …are destroyed by what theyknow by nature like animals …They are blemishes on your love feasts …
save others by snatching them from the fire… have mercy with fear,hating even the tunic stained by their flesh…
St. paul -Rom. 16-16 -“watch out for those who create obstacles …in opposition to the teaching you learned …avoid them…” and so on …any # if instances through OT and NT of real Mercy ,spoken in truth; a source of pain where there has been sin … , yet hopefully would lead to repentance …
How do you ‘spaek’ that truth - pretending he / they are destroying the dignity of The Father image of every man that our Lord came to reveal to us … women are here to bring glory to that Father image in man - by showing our respect , to the fathers , future fathers …which reinforces our own dignity …
Somehwhrere all this has been distorted / destroted , in many lives . . Sharing how much it hurts you to see what they are doing …( ? email contacts, in the beginning - since it might be difficult to talk it out openly …) how you would like to help , as you already are doing …
Homosexuality is thougt to have a component of Father hunger
that make men want to seduce other men for power and control and also enemy/ anger/ unforgiveness towards women/mothers that make them want , to compete with them ( Reverse these - and you have the bondage of lesbianism )
The CURE - an intense program , SPIRITUAL BATTLE ,( just like that of any cocaine/ alcohol addict or ? worse ) - of fasting, EUCHRISTIC ADORATION , to receieve the FATHER LOVE in The Lord ( that they too like St. JOHN, who as the youngest disciple, even as as he also was the’ son of thunder ', could relate the best to this Father Love in the Lord and thus become the beloved disciple …SEE THE FACE OF THE FATHER… and heal The Father wound … Rosary devotion., be in the arms of Mama …even some diet modifications …(Please refer to the one on NFP - what os my hus. thinking - also a good thread to see the struggles of even married ones , to remain chaste …)
Tell him/ them that the most loving thing you would like to offer would be - to keep them company /support in the above …
But pretending like nothing is wrong , would be almost like the Levite who see the wounded man on the street and crossing to the other side …they need to be taken to THE INN…
God Bless!

While reading your response I am reminded that Jesus warned us that Satan would actually use Scripture to further his agenda.

 

[contemplative]

Wondering Waif:

That’s crazy and close-minded.
As for excommunication, it doesn’t wipe out the fact that both of these men were baptized and are still God’s children-so it’s not that easy or well understood.
The way she treats these guys will be copied by her children, she has a real spiritual dilemma and your easy, NO WAY OUT, response is not helping.
Should Phyllis Schafley disinherit her Gay son?

Wondering Waif,
I don’t believe Other Eric is going to return and recant the excommunication comment he made. If you read the thread at all…you would see a number of forum members already approached him on this matter.
JKirkLVNV says it best here in the following:

I have to chime in with OtherEric and Contemplative. I don’t agree with OtherEric completely (one poster cited another thread where I believe his understanding of homosexuality goes radically beyond Church teaching), but he and Contemplative are quite right regarding some of these issues. It’s “unjust” discrimination we’re cautioned against, not wise discrimination. We practice discrimination all of the time when we tell our children,“I don’t want you hanging out with that crowd,” or “You cannot listen to that music in this house” (we practice discrimination in taste, for that matter, ie, "I like Chagall far more that Klimt). I don’t think it’s “unjust” discrimination not to expose your children to objective and grave sin. Inviting the uncle to dinner, for example, but not the partner, seems to me to NOT be unjust. Not taking the children into these men’s home doesn’t seem to be unjust. Now, if the grandparent’s are having a family dinner and the man shows up with the partner, that’s kind of a tough one, but I’m not sure I would deprive my children of their grandparents or vice versa based on the choices of my siblings who might be present. I think I would talk with my children both before and after.

 

[Wondering_Waif]

mass4life:

I agree with this post. In the Scriptures, Jesus was not afraid to call a spade a spade. “You hypocrites! You sinners!” But did he swear not to have anything to do with them? The sinful woman he did not condemn to death, he just told her “Don’t sin anymore!” I believe you would be doing the right thing by this man to maintain contact with HIM, invite HIM to family dinners, don’t allow HIM to go lonely, make sure HE is kept in contact. Simply explain that you are not willing to make a show of acceptance of homosexuality to your children, by inviting into your home his homosexual lover.

You do not owe this society or culture anything. Don’t worry about “hurting some feelings” by not inviting his homosexual lover into the sanctity of your own home.

I ponder the early ages of the Church, the MARTYRS, who gave their LIVES by professing belief in Jesus and His Holy Church. When the Son of Man comes, will He find faith on earth?

Just a comment here, if Jesus actually told me in person to sin no more it would be a lot easier to follow.
Remember that even the Church teaches that to be Gay is NOT a sin.

 

[contemplative]

Quote:
Originally Posted by MikeinSD
I find it gratifying that most posters here are asking that gay men be treated with respect by their families. I was not treated with respect by my family and I’m afraid it cause hard feelings among family members. I will not go into particulars but the “devout” Christians ended up hurting perceptions of their religion and turning off families’ teens. I hope we all learn to tolerate each other.

ladyjayes.com/harpervalley.html

…this is the pay-off when a homosexual demands ‘respect’ in his/her family.
Your story is proof positive of how destructive the homosexual agenda is. Thanks for sharing.

Quote:

The homosexual/gay agenda tears at the very fabric of families. It is a terrible plague.

The devil is having a field day in families these days.

God help us.

 

[mercygate]

Wondering Waif:

Just a comment here, if Jesus actually told me in person to sin no more it would be a lot easier to follow.
Remember that even the Church teaches that to be Gay is NOT a sin.

Having SSA is not a sin. But I wonder if, really, it would be easier to follow Jesus if you had his personal word on it? I often compare intransigence on this subject to the rich young ruler: He turns away “sad” because he will not give up the one thing Jesus asks him to give up if he is to follow Jesus.

 

[fix]

Wondering Waif:

Just a comment here, if Jesus actually told me in person to sin no more it would be a lot easier to follow.
Remember that even the Church teaches that to be Gay is NOT a sin.

To be accurate the Church does not us the word “gay” in official documents. That is for a good reason. The inclination toward homosexual attraction is not a sin.

 

[Wondering_Waif]

contemplative:

Wondering Waif,
I don’t believe Other Eric is going to return and recant the excommunication comment he made. If you read the thread at all…you would see a number of forum members already approached him on this matter.
JKirkLVNV says it best here in the following:

You seem quite a nice person and I thank you for your response.
I am completely convinced that God loves Gays because of the rose that St Teresa gave me. It’s in my St Teresa thread, don’t worry, I didn’t see her in person and given the way it all came about the naysayers could say that it was all coincidence but
the way it all happened convinced me.

I’m not Gay and neither is my brother (my closest male relative)
my family has always been indifferent towards the sexual
orientation of others so the issue never came up, although I remember my father referring to a man as a “twilight” person, beyond that I never had any experience with the Gay community until the AIDS tragedies. However, I’m compassionate towards
the issues that the first poster is trying to address.
One thing about Holiday Dinners that I’m sure of, when Jesus fed the crowds he didn’t make a point of denying food to the sinners.
Of course, if he had, everyone but the kids would have starved.
: )

 

[Wondering_Waif]

fix:

To be accurate the Church does not us the word “gay” in official documents. That is for a good reason. The inclination toward homosexual attraction is not a sin.

Right, I stand corrected.

 

[Wondering_Waif]

mercygate:

Having SSA is not a sin. But I wonder if, really, it would be easier to follow Jesus if you had his personal word on it? I often compare intransigence on this subject to the rich young ruler: He turns away “sad” because he will not give up the one thing Jesus asks him to give up if he is to follow Jesus.

What is SSA? Same Sex Attraction? I can’t imagine how the young rich ruler resisted Jesus, I am quite sure that I would say “of course, of course, anything at all!” But then again, I know that the story ends in Eternal Life and the young ruler didn’t have that advantage.
My acceptance of His conditions would be enlightened self interest so it’s not exactly perfect Love, but that’s where I’m at right now.

 

[kaymart]

contemplative:

Fifty or more years ago no one had to wonder about whether to invite an openly homosexual uncle or aunt to a family gathering.
Today I wonder who or what this generation of people is born from? Who is this generation of people who bore these openly homosexual children? Who is this generation of people that say that we should include openly homosexual couples to tender family gatherings? I don’t understand.

I agree with you whole heartly. Why do we have to accept their behaviors, why do we have to expose our children to them. 50 years ago “Uncle John” would not bring his “friend” to a family gathering. No one had to know of Uncle John’s bedroom activies, nor were they discussed. Uncle John was just a confirmed bacholor. Now it’s in your face, accept my “partner” Love me because I gay and proud. :banghead: I am tired of the Gay agenda in my face tell us we have to accept them, along with their behaviors, and any views we uphold, such as Family, Religion and Morals are considered to be “wrong” because we are “narrow minded”? Well excuse me!

 

[mercygate]

Wondering Waif:

What is SSA? Same Sex Attraction? I can’t imagine how the young rich ruler resisted Jesus, I am quite sure that I would say “of course, of course, anything at all!” But then again, I know that the story ends in Eternal Life and the young ruler didn’t have that advantage.
My acceptance of His conditions would be enlightened self interest so it’s not exactly perfect Love, but that’s where I’m at right now.

Ah. Yes: SSA + same sex attraction. The abbreviation is used among Catholics who have concern/compassion for people who have it. You must be new to this area of concern. You can get some good perspective by visiting the Courage web site. They also have a lot of help for family members of people with SSA – kind of like AA which has Al-Anon for families of alcoholics.

 

[contemplative]

Wondering Waif:

I’m not Gay and neither is my brother (my closest male relative)
my family has always been indifferent towards the sexual
orientation of others so the issue never came up, although I remember my father referring to a man as a “twilight” person, beyond that I never had any experience with the Gay community until the AIDS tragedies. However, I’m compassionate towards
the issues that the first poster is trying to address.

So you really don’t have any first hand experience to share on this matter…OK
If you read this thread closely then perhaps you might learn something on :

How to “treat” homosexual relative

One thing about Holiday Dinners that I’m sure of, when Jesus fed the crowds he didn’t make a point of denying food to the sinners.
Of course, if he had, everyone but the kids would have starved.

I believe ALL eat with Jesus on Jesus’s terms…not their own sinful terms. Only those who turn from God’s ways starve.