Hubby back at work today

  • Thread starter Thread starter Feanaro_s_Wife
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I survived, but just barely. I did only focus on the essentials (never had any grand plans to do anything but, lol). I have no idea how I am going to be able to do this. Physically it is just too demanding. Emotionally it is tough, but I can work through that. But there is nothing I can do to make things physically easier and I’m so scared. Please keep us in your prayers. I am going to need all of the divine intervention that I can get. I try to remember my CAF family in my prayers too!

malia
 
Feanaro_s_Wife said:
I survived, but just barely. I did only focus on the essentials (never had any grand plans to do anything but, lol). I have no idea how I am going to be able to do this. Physically it is just too demanding. Emotionally it is tough, but I can work through that. But there is nothing I can do to make things physically easier and I’m so scared. Please keep us in your prayers. I am going to need all of the divine intervention that I can get. I try to remember my CAF family in my prayers too!

malia
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Well, first day at any job is exhausting - and being an on-your-own mommy is the toughest of all jobs! I will almost certainly get easier for you as you go along, I’m sure. Or you’ll get tougher - one of the two 😉

Prayers for you. :crossrc:
 
LilyM said:
Well, first day at any job is exhausting - and being an on-your-own mommy is the toughest of all jobs! I will almost certainly get easier for you as you go along, I’m sure. Or you’ll get tougher - one of the two 😉

Prayers for you. :crossrc:
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Unfortunately with Fibromyalgia that is not often the case. Even at my healthiest I’ve never been able to keep up with a full time job (9-5, weekends off) so i don’t know how I expected to be able to be a full time mommy:o I need to find a way to adapt/cope like I have with everything else in my life so far…I am just out of ideas and options. I just hope lily gets a little more self-sufficient as time fgoes on so i don’t have a total burnout (been there, done that and it’s not any fun).

alia
 
God bless, Malia, what a heavy cross.

Is there anyway to get help? Have you thought about giving room and board to a college student in exchange for household help?

An au pair?

Can Grandma pitchin for part days?
 
Having been a physically challanged mom myself, some things that helped were

using the umbrella stroller INSIDE the house instead of lugging baby around.

If you have two stories, be sure to have an outpost of everything you need on one floor so you are not running up and down stairs when home alone

Fix lunch/snacks the night before

Have an apron with big pockets (you can get artist’s aprons at Hobby Lobby) - put the cordless phone and other little odds and ends in the pockets.

It amazed me how quickly DS learned to come to mommy instead of mommy running to him.

Do not be afraid to ask for HELP when you need it - it is a way that other people can feel they are being a blessing to you.
 
**Sorry I can’t reply to everyone who has been nice enough to post. But thank you all!!! To answer a few questions (that I remember, lol)…

Hubby was home for the past 9 months. He sure is going to miss her!

My mom is able to pop by and help a bit. But her health isn’t much better than mine. But at least she can watch Lily while I go to the bathroom or make lunch.

We won’t have anyone move in with us. We don’t have the space and I don’t really like living with anyone. Plus, our dog would make that next to impossible (had a roommate once for a short while).

Since I have been sick for most of my life I am already pretty good at prioritizing things and letting go of stuff that’s impossible for me to do. But right now lily is at the age (added to her temperment:rolleyes:) where I have to literally be within inches of her at all times because of the dangerous stunts she attempts, lol. I wish she would just sit down and play with a toy!!!

Have to go…hubby is getting her down to bed and I have to get supper finished…

Malia**
 
I’ll pray for you…it IS hard, isn’t it? So hard, esp when you’re in so much pain…and that age is the exploring everything age.

How’s the Lily-proofed containment room working out?
 
kage_ar said:
Play pen, you need a play pen.
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That’s what I was thinking! Joey was about 9-10 months old before we introduced him to the play pen (not on purpose, it’s just how things happened), and he quite liked it for several months. Even when he got older (about 18 months) he was amused to be put in the play pen for a few minutes when it was not a very good idea for him to be roaming around the house free-range (when we were drilling into the wall, moving furniture, etc.)

Another thing you can try is to rotate seats. Give her play time, then it’s time for toys in the high chair. Then she gets some more exploring time, then into the exersaucer, then more time out in the open, then toys in the play pen. And then she’s ready for the high chair again. If she’s still in her infant carrier, you can add that into the mix as well. It worked well for us when Joey was about Lily’s age. Oh, and the stroller too. That’s also a different seat to add to the rotation.

I will be praying extra-hard for you today! I’m offering my day up for you today.
 
CatholicSam said:
Another thing you can try is to rotate seats. Give her play time, then it’s time for toys in the high chair. Then she gets some more exploring time, then into the exersaucer, then more time out in the open, then toys in the play pen. And then she’s ready for the high chair again. If she’s still in her infant carrier, you can add that into the mix as well.Oh, and the stroller too. That’s also a different seat to add to the rotation.

.
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**I keep getting surprised by how different Lily really is from the “average” baby. She does not stop. The only way she’ll tolerate sitting in her high chair (hook on portable, by the way) is if she’s eating. But when she’s done, she’s DONE.

She won’t really play with toys so the playpen isn’t her idea of fun. She will be ok in her crib for short periods but only to stand up and then throw herself down. She needs a helmet:rolleyes:.

Infant carrier??? LOL… not my Lily. She hates being confined. You should see how much fun she is to change (diaper) now. When i say she is constantly on the move, i am not exaggerating. She does not sit still…ever.

The exersaucer is my only life saver right now. I drag it around the first floor for when I need her contained (cooking, bathroom etc). But it doesn’t hold her attention for too long.

I am exhausted after today. Add her constant motion/getting into things with the fact that we are still doing the exercise ball with the Ergo for her naps and I just want to cry. I’m exhausted and in so much pain.

Malia**
 
As a mom who has major mobility/pain issues - I can sooo relate! Heck, I had the added joy of a son who was half as tall as me by age 6 months and as tall as me by age 5 - lugging him around was a sight to behold.

Maybe for your girl, you could make one area of the living room into a child friendly zone? Use those baby gate/corrall things to make a baby girl sector. Have a comfy chair for mom in there, a few soft toys and that is it. This way she can move around as much as she wants in that controlled space, but, you are not running yourself ragged all over the house!
 
kage_ar said:
As a mom who has major mobility/pain issues - I can sooo relate! Heck, I had the added joy of a son who was half as tall as me by age 6 months and as tall as me by age 5 - lugging him around was a sight to behold.

Thanks. I know I’m not the only one this is hard for. Thank you for giving me your perspective too.

Maybe for your girl, you could make one area of the living room into a child friendly zone? Use those baby gate/corrall things to make a baby girl sector. Have a comfy chair for mom in there, a few soft toys and that is it. This way she can move around as much as she wants in that controlled space, but, you are not running yourself ragged all over the house!

**We had plans for a babyproof room upstairs but with hubby going back to work sooner than expected it isn’t finished. But it’s more babyproof than the rest of the house and has a babygate so it’s where we spend a lot of time. The living room needs some work too so I don’t have to worry about her falling down the one step into the porch or smashing the tv with something:rolleyes:. Hopefully we’'l get it completed soon.

Malia**
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Feanaro_s_Wife said:
I literally only have a few seconds to type this. Surprise, hubby was due back yesterday instead of the 18th like we thought. So here I am alone with lily for the first time,please pray!

Malia
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Peace be with you auntie nola
I know you’ve heard this from many people but i’m sure you’ll be fine… I’ll keep you in prayer:)

God Bless,
Podo
 
Hi Malia, how are you & Lily doing in the absence of your husband? How is Lily taking your husband’s absence? Quite often my little girl would look for me when I am at work and my wife would have to call me on the phone by voice or video call just to keep her quiet; and I am just 8 - 10 hours away from home each day. Anyway I hope everything is well. Will remember your family in my prayers.

atelim
 
atelim said:
Hi Malia, how are you & Lily doing in the absence of your husband?

**Thanks for asking. It is the single most difficult thing I have ever had to do. But each day we survive. I don’t know how, lol. **

How is Lily taking your husband’s absence?

So much better than we anticipated!!! She is definitely becoming more attached to me though. That is both good and bad.

Quite often my little girl would look for me when I am at work and my wife would have to call me on the phone by voice or video call just to keep her quiet; and I am just 8 - 10 hours away from home each day.

Some days hubby is able to come home for lunch so that helps break up the day. And he is generally home by 4pm so has some time to play with Lily and give her a bath etc before she’s off to bed.

Anyway I hope everything is well. Will remember your family in my prayers.
**
Thank you so much for the prayers. I have a sneaking suspicion that it is the prayers from you and the others here that are helping us get through each day.**

atelim
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