Humility or Disrespect?

[adstrinity]

Hey All.

I am asking you because you are Catholic and have a better understanding of what I’m going through.

I moved to OK from IL in January. I was able to get a job 14 days later. It was advertised as, “Receptionist,” or something like that at a Salon. I wasn’t going to apply, but, it was on the way between two other places to which I applied. I applied on a Friday and was called on Saturday.

It’s really more than a receptionist job, as I was told after I was hired. It’s also sales and cleanining up the place and making sure that the business runs smoothly and being my boss’ right hand person. She said that the actual title of the job is, “Salon Manager,” but, I’m not there yet.

She also told me that it’s not a part-time job, but, though I have been there for over a month now, it’s still part time hours. Even if I work full time (all when the shop is open), and take an hour for lunch each day, I’ll still be 32.5 hours AT BEST.

Did I mention that this is the lowest paying job I’ve ever had, too? It is UNDER minimum wage. $6. Per hour. It was her husband’s idea: start out small and if they really want the job, they’ll work and can get raises. The last person who was there for a while was there for 2 years and was making $8/hr.

The cost of living down here is not as expensive, but, all in all, I think my bills are more than my income. If it wasn’t for me selling land, I don’t think I could make it at all.

If nothing else, not that I don’t feel God will provide, because He has and He will, but, none of the taxes are taken out of my check. Providing I make over $600 while there, I will get a 1099 next year so I can pay the taxes. …To be honest, I think I’ll need a part time job just to pay the government back because I cannot save up any money as it is.

I prayed for a job. I prayed for a career. I told my boss I like this job because I didn’t want to have to look for work again (who knew if I would find any), and disappoint my family who was so happy I had got a job.

I turned down other jobs that Monday (a Legal Secretary where I’d be making $8/hr, because she didn’t get back to me in a timely fashion, and I didn’t feel comfortable quitting my new job when both the Lawyer and the Salon Owner request, “loyalty,” out of their workers, and a potential job for inbound calls…potential because they wanted to bring me in for a FIRST interview…and that was about 1.5 hours away). I wanted to be the one for this woman. I knew she was getting sick of training people and training people isn’t easy, especially when you are the only one there.

I prayed for humility and so, I accepted this job, where I’m asked to do everything but hair and nails. I have to clean and balance the drawers and help customers et al.

I also have to deal with my boss. She’s a good Baptist woman and that’s what also attracted me to this job (I’ve never been at a place where we opened with prayer before), but, I can see now why other people quit on her.

Should she make it to May, this shop will be open 7 years, and she says it’s not her business but the Lord’s Business.

Besides the money issue (and she always tells her clients, money isn’t everything…and I agree, but, when one cannot pay the meanest of bills, that motto is a load of rubbish), she will say one thing and say something contradictory throughout the day.

I have taken her saying that I’m not wonderful at my job (she’ll praise me on my phone work, but not acknowledge all else that I do). I have taken her slight insults (regarding my weight, and not being there to sell a pair of contacts when I was doing inventory in the back room, like she told me – I CAN’T BILOCATE!!!). Today, though, something happened TWICE that made me wonder if it wasn’t time to start looking for a new job.

She was testing out a new girl for a part time Front Desk position on Saturday (my job, but, even more part time than it is now). I thought she was going to be hired, but, yesterday my boss told me that she was never going to be hired and she had told her that, but, she was only trying her out.

The reason this new girl was brought in, I believe, was because I had left early the day before due to a malady. I also called in the week before one day because I was sick, so, I missed 10 hours (9 if one takes lunch into account) in two weeks. Like I said, I am the person to make sure the business runs so that my boss can do hair.

So, there was a new new girl today. I got annoyed when she was visiting with the Massage Therapist, but, I thought, well, maybe she’s a better multi-tasker than I am and it’s better I do this labouring work (sweeping/cleaning/inventory), because I’ll be the full time person there, so, it’s best I know where all the inventory is. At one point, though, my boss tells me that I can get her to help me or get her to do it, so, I show her how to do the inventory.

She finishes the one room and asks me when is lunch and I tell her, if she’s on the same schedule as me, between either 1230 and 1330 or 1300 to 1400, but, if she’s hungry, ask Our Boss, and I’m sure she’ll let her go. (She said she had to go to the realator’s.) She would be gone from 1200 to 1300 and I could go to lunch from 1300 to 1400).

 

[adstrinity]

She scurries out of the shop and calls about 40 minutes later, and I guess she’s decided to go back to her old job because they offered her more money. My boss tries to talk her out of it (if that is really what the case is), but, asks her to think about it.

My boss then says in front of me and in front of clients, “I really liked her. I wish she would have stayed. Whenever I hire someone I REALLY like and who are good at their job, they always leave me.”

I didn’t know how to take that.

A few minutes later she says, again, in front of me and in front of clients, “I was hoping to have a good crew going by my anniversary, but, oh well.”

Saints have put up with worse, I am aware, and, I realise that ranting about all of this will not help me but only add more time in Purgatory rather than accept the sufferings here, but, at the same time, the American in me thinks, “persuit of happiness.” I am aware I am subject to my boss and that she deserves my respect.

The motto for the shop is, “Honesty, Loyalty, and Respect.”

I have signed a contract with her that I am bound to her for 6 months, should I quit on her, she can keep my last week’s pay check.

Finally in all this, remember Saturday New Hire? The one who she was never going to hire? Because this new new girl quit, she wanted me to call up the one who was there on Saturday. She then told me, though she was telling me she was just testing her out for a few days, she had planned to bring New Hire in for two days a week, and New New Hire in for three days (I had assumed she just meant to test out). I call New Hire and alert my boss she is on the phone, and my boss picks up and says, “Hi, I meant to call you earlier…how would you like to come in…”

This other girl starts tomorrow, I think,…again

Being fired will not do my self-esteem any wonders, but, if it is God’s Will…

I just don’t know what I should do. A friend I met through my parents told me to start looking for another job, not just part-time, a real nother job.

Again, I prayed for humility, but, try as I might, I just have not been happy at this job. Is God trying to extend His Love to me by providing me such a wonderful oportunity to get over my pride or do I deserve better as a human being?

Opinions?

 

[Eucharisted]

Be humble, and look for another job - even if you don’t want one. It’s always good to know of one, sort of as a back-up.

 

[jpjd]

Why do you want to stay here? Your boss, as you have described her, has none of the qualilties of a good boss. I find it interesting that she emphasizes loyalty, and yet it is practiced only one-way: from the employees to her.

This job should not be viewed as long-term, and certainly not as leading to a career in this shop. It should be viewed as a temporary stepping-stone to a better job.

This should be your game plan:

1. Put forth your best effort in this job.
2. At the same time, be actively looking for a new job.
3. When you find a good job, give your boss 2 weeks notice.
4. When you leave, know that you have handled the situation with class.

 

[Trishie]

What jpjd said.

Loyalty and respect is a two-way street. She’s not keeping her end of that bargain. She is disloyal and disrespectful. Jesus said, “love others as yourself”, “treat others as you want to be treated.” I don’t think you’re obliged to stay with this job if you can find a better…remember that Jesus also said, “a labourer is worthy of his hire.” She doesn’t pay what is rightful either. I wouldn’t feel bound by loyalty to this job.

I ask our Lord to help you to learn and to grow in whatever He wishes through this experience, then to lead you where He wishes. There will be good that He can achieve even here before you go. For instance, if you pray for this woman, you may be the only person who ever specifically prayed for her. Maybe that prayer will lead in the end to her eternal salvation.

 

[Corki]

Are you in the US? If so, and you decide to leave, report her to the Labor Department. It’s illegal to pay under minimum wage or to have hourly employees sign employment contracts without getting something in return.

Humility and loyalty are good. But this is exploitation and if you don’t report her, she will do it to someone else when you are gone.

 

[adstrinity]

Are you in the US? If so, and you decide to leave, report her to the Labor Department. It’s illegal to pay under minimum wage or to have hourly employees sign employment contracts without getting something in return.

Humility and loyalty are good. But this is exploitation and if you don’t report her, she will do it to someone else when you are gone.

Thank you all, and I ask for others’ comments as well only because I know I’m missing an opportunity here to share in the sufferings of Christ. If there’s anybody who sees it that way, please let me know.

Though, I’ve been thinking about it, perhaps I am becomming proud in developing a martyr complex? That wont help.

Anyway, Corki, I quote you because, I thank you for your comment, and I’d like the forum to know, I looked at the minimum wage website (yes, I am in the US). It turns out that only employers with 10 or more employees need to pay minimum wage (unless it’s a waiting job). I really don’t know how many people she would plan to hire, but, except for my job, the others (cosmotologist, stylist, nail tech – assuming any are hired), are either percentage or booth rent, MEANING, either they will either get 60% of the payment of any customer they work on and my boss will get 40% (which is pretty standard, I think) until they get clientelle of their own. IF they have clientelle, then they make all the money they make from their clients, but, have to pay my boss since they are taking up space in her shop. It is doubtful she’s going to hire 10 or more people for front desk.

What do you mean, “without getting something in return”? That last sentence, what?]

I can also make commission, if I either sell a product(s) or bring people in. 10% of the sale. I was doing well my first week, but, then she told me, more specifically how, that I was kind of taking advantage of the system. I’ve tried to sell things, but, the customers weren’t interested at my suggestions.

My favourite piece of advice I’ve gotten from her is I don’t need to sell the items, the items sell themselves.

Some do. …Not all…

Also, funny thing, because she wanted me to start wearing make-up, and because I wanted to help the business (I bought a Swiffer Vac that I hope to be able to take back without the box to get my money back), and because I wanted to see if Paul Mitchell products are really better than generic, and various other things, AND, because for my own vanity, I’ve also purchased violet contacts ($27.25 with tax) and a scrunchie made out of purple synthetic hair ($10): I’ve paid her probably about as much as she has paid me.

 

[monicatholic]

adstrinity,

you have plenty of time to job search.

do.

your post is articulate and thoughtful. your sentiments are generous and considerate. please PLEASE find a situation that will spotlight your gifts, not exploit you.

the boss-husband’s self-serving philosophy “let them work up” didn’t prove to be much for the last gal-- 8 bucks an hour after two years for doing every kind of work? these days my teens make more than that and we live in the VERY DEPRESSED midwest. last year, though, my daughter took a min. wage job in a Catholic school because she felt so bad for their dire straights financial condition. she worked AT MOST twenty hours a week and is right now scrambling to come up with the two grand she owes in taxes (becuase they didn’t take out any either.)

consider this:

God grant me the serenity to accept the things i cannot change
'the courage to change the things i can
and the wisdom to know the difference.

starting backward: the wisdom to know what’s changeable and what’s not. the job IS changeable and should be.

the courage to change what you can: get out there looking again.

and the serenity to accept what can’t be changed-- while you’re looking, while you’re waiting for call backs, you accept what’s true with peace and confidence in God’s love for you.

 

[redtech]

I agree with the above posters. Get out of there!

 

[Bruised_Reed]

What do you mean, “without getting something in return”? That last sentence, what?

I don’t know specifically what the PP meant but the contract should have stipulated that you have some recourse as well. She gets your last paycheck if you leave before 6 months; what do you get if she lets you go before six months?

But I doubt she will fire you; instead she will make your job so miserable (by cutting your hours, expecting you to do the grunt work while new hires get to the cushier work, etc) that you quit. The fact that she had you sign a contract tells me she has a problem keeping people in that position.

You want to share in the sufferings of Christ so offer this up. After you have accepted a better job continue to offer it up every time you remember how small this woman made you feel.

We all have to do things that we don’t want to or take jobs that are less than ideal, that’s life; and it’s a good thing that you want to grow in virtue but listen to the advice offered.

 

[jpjd]

I’ve also purchased violet contacts ($27.25 with tax)

Did you know that you must have a prescription in order to buy contact lenses, since contacts lenses are considered to be a medical device? Did you also know that you must be fitted for contact lenses by a licensed eye care professional (i.e. optometrist or ophthalmologist) before a prescription can be written? If your boss is selling contact lenses to anyone who does not have a written, unexpired, prescription, she is breaking the law and can get into serious trouble.

 

[Becks]

adstrinity,

Not to derail your thread, I know this isn’t the purpose of it, but the Fair Labor Standards Act applies to companies that have two or more employees. Check out this link to the Department of Labor. dol.gov/esa/whd/regs/compliance/whdfs14.pdf

Now your company may not have at least $500,000.00 in annual sales. I don’t know. You could also check into your state’s laws because many states have laws that are more generous to workers than the federal laws are.

Regardless of all that, sounds like your boss is a jerk who tells people what they want to hear in order to get them to work for her and then treats them poorly. I would leave.

 

[Corki]

adstrinity,

Not to derail your thread, I know this isn’t the purpose of it, but the Fair Labor Standards Act applies to companies that have two or more employees. Check out this link to the Department of Labor. dol.gov/esa/whd/regs/compliance/whdfs14.pdf

Now your company may not have at least $500,000.00 in annual sales. I don’t know. You could also check into your state’s laws because many states have laws that are more generous to workers than the federal laws are.

Regardless of all that, sounds like your boss is a jerk who tells people what they want to hear in order to get them to work for her and then treats them poorly. I would leave.

Becks,

The $500,000 floor is not likely to apply to a salon. It’s $500,000 OR engage in interstate commerce. Interstate commerce for purposes of the FLSA includes phone calls, mail, ordering supplies,etc. to or from any other state.

I have never heard of the 2 employee rule, though, and couldn’t find it on the dol.gov site. Can you show/point me to where you found it?

 

[Becks]

Becks,

The $500,000 floor is not likely to apply to a salon. It’s $500,000 OR engage in interstate commerce. Interstate commerce for purposes of the FLSA includes phone calls, mail, ordering supplies,etc. to or from any other state.

I have never heard of the 2 employee rule, though, and couldn’t find it on the dol.gov site. Can you show/point me to where you found it?

The link that I posted is a PDF that I pulled off the Wage and Hour’s website under “Fact Sheets.” Of course it’s not the FLSA itself (I can’t stand trying to read actual Acts myself, and I’m an attorney!). If you look at that PDF, about halfway down the page is an overview of what industries are covered under “Enterprise Coverage.”

Good point about the Interstate Commerce, though. I’m sorry I left that out.

 

[1ke]

There seem to be a lot of possibly illegal practices going on with this “boss.” Hiring an employee and putting them on a 1099 is illegal. Paying under minimum wage is, most likely, illegal. Report her behavior to the Labor Board and let them do the determination of what is legal or illegal.

You can stay and be a martyr if you want to, but don’t for one minute think it’s because God wants you to work for this person who is violating the Seventh Commandment. I think you are taking the idea of suffering for Christ in a wholly wrong direction, perhaps you could benefit from spiritual direction. From the Catechism:

**2434 A just wage is the legitimate fruit of work. To refuse or withhold it can be a grave injustice. **In determining fair pay both the needs and the contributions of each person must be taken into account. “Remuneration for work should guarantee man the opportunity to provide a dignified livelihood for himself and his family on the material, social, cultural and spiritual level, taking into account the role and the productivity of each, the state of the business, and the common good.” **Agreement between the parties is not sufficient to justify morally the amount to be received in wages. **

**
2436 It is unjust not to pay the social security contributions required by legitimate authority. **

Quit. Find a new job that will treat you with dignity and respect and not try to cheat you and the US government.

 

[Corki]

Becks,

Thanks. I am no lawyer either but from that document it looks like the 2 employee minimun only applies to the enterprise category, not the individual one. The fact that it mentions that domestic workers are covered seems to point that way too.

In any case,

Adstrinity,

Sorry, I missed the part about you being in Oklahoma. If I were you, I would call the OK labor department and ask. If your boss pays either herself or her husband a salary, there’s your two employees. Also, the days when she had that other person trying out the job, she had two employees. Keep your head up and keep looking.

 

[whatevergirl]

I would look for another job. Be polite while there, but basically, this is a toxic working environment, they want to pay someone below minimum wage, but get the world?

I would look for something much better…quit, give them two weeks, as a courtesy…and I would also report them to the government organization that deals with minimum wage requirements. It’s illegal to pay your employees UNDER minimum wage, if they are w-2’d. (unless it’s a waitress position, etc where you would have the ability to make consistent tips) I don’t believe waitresses and hair stylists are w-2’d…but I’m not 100% sure.

I worked parttime back in college for a hair salon and it was BRUTAL. Mean spirited people day in and day out…it’s not easy to work in the fashion/hair/makeup business…

I say…look for something better…like yesterday. It’s one thing to be humble towards others, but you don’t need to tolerate this behavior so I would remove myself as soon as possible from the situation. Hope it works out for you.

 

[adstrinity]

Thank you ALL for the replies!!

I am on my lunch break at home now as I type this.

It may interest you to know that last night I began to look for other work. I sent in my resume and called a place this morning. It is still under minimum wage, but, more than my first job, and more than I am making now, and hours are 40-49, IF I get this job. IF I get this job, it appears to use more of my gifts. I interview et al tomorrow afternoon after I get off of work.

Regarding the contract: I typed it up. It was originally worded so that if I am no longer employed by my boss I lose my last paycheck. I typed it up so that if I am fired, I am not entitled to it. I didn’t want to be fired AND no paycheck.

Cleaning was always part of the position. She wants everything done and now. It’s not easy to jump in with both feet and do everything when the filing system is not organized and I don’t know where anything is. I asked her the first week I was there one day, “What do you want done first, sweeping or some office thing that needed to be done but I cannot remember now?” Her response? “All of it.”

I also pointed out to her, approximately the first week I was there, that the anti-virus program she had said that it was at risk or something. I pointed this out while a customer was waiting to pay (everything is on the computer). My boss said, “Okay well, we can worry about that later, we’ll take care of this now.”

I wasn’t worried about it. I wanted to point this out to her and await her instructions if I should close that or not. I wanted her to be aware of the situation. I later found out she doesn’t much know about computers. As a matter of fact, I went back after hours last Saturday to help her e-mail something (off the clock. I volunteered. I want her to know how to e-mail).

The computer hasn’t worked for the past 3 days. It will turn on, but, we can’t get it to start up, really.

The contacts: These are non-prescription vanity contacts. They’re just different colors. She may have a license to sell them for all I know.

She gave me a compliment today, the same compliment she’s been giving me for the past couple of weeks: Once I get the other stuff down that I need to do, she thinks I’ll be great at the job…if I still want the job.

I have been working toward the Salon Manager job, but, with comments like this and such…perhaps it’s not for me.

While she has assured me that I’m getting there little by little, I’m still just getting there.

There’s more I want to say, but, my hour is almost up.

Edit: Also, as it stands, I am not sure if I’m going to do the two weeks thing or just keep working part time (mornings some days) until August when my contract is up. My contract stipulates that I either renew or give two weeks notice THEN.

 

[jpjd]

The contacts: These are non-prescription vanity contacts. They’re just different colors. She may have a license to sell them for all I know.

There is no such thing as non-prescription contacts. Even if they have a power of +0.00. Even if they are color.

The reason for needing a prescription for contacts is not because of power, it’s because the person is wearing them on their eyes. Eyes have a curvature and the doctor needs to determine the correct base curve to fit the person’s curvature. Contacts are a foreign body placed on the eye, and it requires that a doctor prescribe the proper base curve (and power for those who need it) to fit the eye. It is not a trivial matter. People can and do get painful and eyesight-threatening corneal ulcers from wearing the wrong base curve.

There is no license to sell contact lenses. What permits someone to sell them is a prescription from the wearer.