T
Topaz1128
Guest
I am a faithful Catholic male who is married to an agnostic. I converted about three years ago, and my wife had no interest. I respect her decision, though.
Anyway, after our second son was born five years ago, she lost all interest in sex. This was just about the time that I started seeking out the Church. Not yet being a Catholic (and not having strong convictions on Church teachings about sex), I asked her if she would bring me to climax outside of her body from time to time because I still desired sex. Looking back, though, I see how selfish and sinful I was.
I think it was a blessing in disguise because since we have been abstinent for the past several years, my conscience has been clear (no contraception, no ejaculating outside of her) and she has been happy.
I still crave sex and struggle so much with being in a marriage with no contact whatsoever. However, that is something that I gave up to God. I didn’t want a divorce because we have two young children and I didn’t want to lose them.
My point is to stay close to God and do His will. If I were in your situation, I wouldn’t feel comfortable with him pulling out and climaxing that way; I would not want any part of that.
Our parish offers free counseling. Could you seek out a Catholic therapist? Even if your husband doesn’t join you (my wife doesn’t), it would help you tremendously to talk these things out with a good Catholic therapist of the same gender.
I really admire your courage, and knowing how a man’s sex drive is, it must be so difficult for you to stick to your beliefs in situations like this.
You will be in my prayers.
Anyway, after our second son was born five years ago, she lost all interest in sex. This was just about the time that I started seeking out the Church. Not yet being a Catholic (and not having strong convictions on Church teachings about sex), I asked her if she would bring me to climax outside of her body from time to time because I still desired sex. Looking back, though, I see how selfish and sinful I was.
I think it was a blessing in disguise because since we have been abstinent for the past several years, my conscience has been clear (no contraception, no ejaculating outside of her) and she has been happy.
I still crave sex and struggle so much with being in a marriage with no contact whatsoever. However, that is something that I gave up to God. I didn’t want a divorce because we have two young children and I didn’t want to lose them.
My point is to stay close to God and do His will. If I were in your situation, I wouldn’t feel comfortable with him pulling out and climaxing that way; I would not want any part of that.
Our parish offers free counseling. Could you seek out a Catholic therapist? Even if your husband doesn’t join you (my wife doesn’t), it would help you tremendously to talk these things out with a good Catholic therapist of the same gender.
I really admire your courage, and knowing how a man’s sex drive is, it must be so difficult for you to stick to your beliefs in situations like this.
You will be in my prayers.