Husband Okay with Wife Watching Porn?

[SighGuy]

Personally, I think we ought to leave aside the issue of whether or not the show is considered porn, at least inasmuch as your direct problem is concerned.

Sure, let’s say it is. But your husband doesn’t believe that. This means, you will possibly never go beyond the first step “this show is porn,” because you will never agree on it, thus completely ignoring the more important things. Porn is a gross violation of human dignity, and if you find the show to be also, instead of calling it “porn” call it something else, like “something that denigrates human dignity.” Opting for a different word, although it has not changed your intent at all, may be the secret to at least advancing your argument a little bit further.

(Consider when I say: empowering the economically marginalized vs. taking care of the poor. They’re the same thing couched in different language which appeals to different users, but you’re going to run into suspicion when you talk to a Christian about empowering the economically marginalized, yet all signals are go when you bring it up as taking care of the poor!)

 

[elise526]

Personally, I think we ought to leave aside the issue of whether or not the show is considered porn, at least inasmuch as your direct problem is concerned.

Sure, let’s say it is. But your husband doesn’t believe that. This means, you will possibly never go beyond the first step “this show is porn,” because you will never agree on it, thus completely ignoring the more important things. Porn is a gross violation of human dignity, and if you find the show to be also, instead of calling it “porn” call it something else, like “something that denigrates human dignity.” Opting for a different word, although it has not changed your intent at all, may be the secret to at least advancing your argument a little bit further.

(Consider when I say: empowering the economically marginalized vs. taking care of the poor. They’re the same thing couched in different language which appeals to different users, but you’re going to run into suspicion when you talk to a Christian about empowering the economically marginalized, yet all signals are go when you bring it up as taking care of the poor!)

That is awesome advice. Thank you.

 

[Jon_S_1]

Personally, I think we ought to leave aside the issue of whether or not the show is considered porn, at least inasmuch as your direct problem is concerned.

Sure, let’s say it is. But your husband doesn’t believe that. This means, you will possibly never go beyond the first step “this show is porn,” because you will never agree on it, thus completely ignoring the more important things. Porn is a gross violation of human dignity, and if you find the show to be also, instead of calling it “porn” call it something else, like “something that denigrates human dignity.” Opting for a different word, although it has not changed your intent at all, may be the secret to at least advancing your argument a little bit further.

(Consider when I say: empowering the economically marginalized vs. taking care of the poor. They’re the same thing couched in different language which appeals to different users, but you’re going to run into suspicion when you talk to a Christian about empowering the economically marginalized, yet all signals are go when you bring it up as taking care of the poor!)

This is great advice!

I would say Sopranos is far more take than other HBO Shows. Also the T AND A can be fast forwarded since it’s not all that frequent.

I’ll admit it, I like the Sopranos

But the point is, if my wife had a problem with it, I would find something else to watch. I think if you discuss it with your husband and offer to help him find a new series to watch it would hopefully work out well.

 

[Burt_Macklin]

This is great advice!

I would say Sopranos is far more take than other HBO Shows. Also the T AND A can be fast forwarded since it’s not all that frequent.

I’ll admit it, I like the Sopranos

But the point is, if my wife had a problem with it, I would find something else to watch. I think if you discuss it with your husband and offer to help him find a new series to watch it would hopefully work out well.

Why are the simulated sex scenes in the Sopranos not porn while those in GoT are? They are both acts of real or simulated sex that remove the sex act from intimacy of the partners in order to display them to third parties.

From the catechism.

2354 Pornography consists in removing real or simulated sexual acts from the intimacy of the partners, in order to display them deliberately to third parties. It offends against chastity because it perverts the conjugal act, the intimate giving of spouses to each other. It does grave injury to the dignity of its participants (actors, vendors, the public), since each one becomes an object of base pleasure and illicit profit for others. It immerses all who are involved in the illusion of a fantasy world. It is a grave offense. Civil authorities should prevent the production and distribution of pornographic materials.

That definition would include the Sopranos, GoT, and many R-rated movies as well.

 

[Jon_S_1]

Why are the simulated sex scenes in the Sopranos not porn while those in GoT are? They are both acts of real or simulated sex that remove the sex act from intimacy of the partners in order to display them to third parties.

From the catechism.

2354 Pornography consists in removing real or simulated sexual acts from the intimacy of the partners, in order to display them deliberately to third parties. It offends against chastity because it perverts the conjugal act, the intimate giving of spouses to each other. It does grave injury to the dignity of its participants (actors, vendors, the public), since each one becomes an object of base pleasure and illicit profit for others. It immerses all who are involved in the illusion of a fantasy world. It is a grave offense. Civil authorities should prevent the production and distribution of pornographic materials.

That definition would include the Sopranos, GoT, and many R-rated movies as well.

I didn’t say they weren’t, I’d say they are, It’s been years since I watched one season of sopranos, and I don’t recall much sex scenes, the couple I recall could easily be skipped.

I haven’t seen GAme of thrones. I have seen a few other Stars series and HBO Series that had way more sex in it.

Also, I think I watched Sopranos when it was on regular cable and probably edited quite a bit.

 

[Jon_S_1]

This is great advice!

I would say Sopranos is far more tame than other HBO Shows. Also the T AND A can be fast forwarded since it’s not all that frequent.

I’ll admit it, I like the Sopranos

But the point is, if my wife had a problem with it, I would find something else to watch. I think if you discuss it with your husband and offer to help him find a new series to watch it would hopefully work out well.

 

[elise526]

From what I know and have seen, there are sex scenes or at least a lot of nudity in every episode…

Great username, BTW, Burt Macklin. Now there’s a show that I love the heck out of.

 

[Burt_Macklin]

From what I know and have seen, there are sex scenes or at least a lot of nudity in every episode…

Great username, BTW, Burt Macklin. Now there’s a show that I love the heck out of.

I’ve seen the Sopranos and I can’t remember any nudity in it. It doesn’t appear to be so pervasive that you can’t enjoy the show.

Admittedly there is more gratuitous sex in GoT but it doesn’t appear to be the main focus of the show either. I seriously doubt anybody is watching the show for a few fleeting glimpses of a flaccid male appendage. The people that want to see that sort of stuff have a whole internet at their fingertips full of penises to peruse. The appeal of GoT is dragons and zombies and such.

Anyway, it seems you’ve spoken your mind, so I would just leave it at that. Let him enjoy his show if that is what he wants to watch.

 

[MacBP]

Putting aside the Game of Thrones debate (I say that it isn’t porn but could be problematic based on the viewer), I think you should understand that your husband’s viewpoint is shared by the vast majority of North American men. That doesn’t make it right, or even acceptable, but I think it is understandable. I’m not sure how involved you or your husband are in the Catholic faith. Based on his view of porn, it would seem like he has some work to do. Perhaps you might consider finding ways to help him advance in his relationship with Jesus? Once that begins to develop the rest will fall into place.

 

[Jon_S_1]

Putting aside the Game of Thrones debate (I say that it isn’t porn but could be problematic based on the viewer), I think you should understand that your husband’s viewpoint is shared by the vast majority of North American men. That doesn’t make it right, or even acceptable, but I think it is understandable. I’m not sure how involved you or your husband are in the Catholic faith. Based on his view of porn, it would seem like he has some work to do. Perhaps you might consider finding ways to help him advance in his relationship with Jesus? Once that begins to develop the rest will fall into place.

This is a good point. I had no reason to turn from a life of sin despite being "christian " until I got serious about my faith.

 

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