Husband opposed to NFP

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JLCecilia

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My husband and I just had our 3rd child in December and it’s time for post-partum NFP classes. We have only been married 4.5 yrs. This time last year, discovering I was pregnant again resulted in a knock-down drag-out fight about NFP. He does not believe it works, but is unwilling to participate in its effectiveness.

I believe everything the Church teaches about NFP and why and the teachings regarding contraception and sterilization. But, b/c DH does not share my faith in general or beliefs in NFP, I am not reaping all the professed benefits of NFP such as enhanced communication and non-physical affection. This is very difficult for me.

I am afraid b/c even when I am confident in my NFPing, DH does not listen to me and often still approaches me during unsafe times. I have a hard time saying no to him b/c I discovered his problem w/ internet pornography 2 summers ago and I’m afraid that turning him down will turn him back to the computer or that he’ll ‘take care of things himself’ otherwise. He was seriously considering a vasectomy which I’m opposed to.

He will go with me to the classes, but he won’t participate in the practice at home and he will not go to see the priest with me. I just don’t know what to do. I certainly need a break from having so many babies, but I don’t think celibacy is a good alternative. Sometimes it seems like our physical affection is the only thing we can share when there are so many fundamental differences in our marriage. I also think that the total lack of affection would put us on edge w/ each other and our children. Just not sure about all of this.

We both need a break and have a hard time getting away together as a couple. As supportive as our families try to be, watching 3 under 4 is just too big of an undertaking for any of them. Just feel like all of this is pushing us apart rather than bring us together.

Please pray that DH will get on board.
 
Praying that your DH will come to see the great benefits of NFP and will be able to control himself during your fertile days. May you both grow more intimate by praying together and by your attending Mass together and by talking about how important God is in your lives. May your husband be responsible for his actions and try his hardest to keep away from anything that would harm his or your soul. Amen.
 
Praying that you will have the grace to handle this and that the profound beauty of God’s plan for marriage will be made known to your husband.
 
Well, DH and I have NEVER prayed together and he does not attend mass, however, just this evening he was telling me what he was giving up for Lent. Pray that God uses this small window for the very greatest good for DH and his faith and our marriage.
 
JLCecilia said:
Well, DH and I have NEVER prayed together and he does not attend mass, however, just this evening he was telling me what he was giving up for Lent. Pray that God uses this small window for the very greatest good for DH and his faith and our marriage.
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Certainly! That seems like a good sign.

Dear Jesus, we thank You for Your faithful servant Cecilia. She wants to live a life in accordance with the teachings of Your Church, but her husband does not share the same attitude. Pour out Your grace on this marriage, O Lord–grace for Cecilia to choose charity instead of frustration, and especially grace for her husband to be open to You. Our lives are in Your hands, Jesus.

In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.
 
You will be in my prayers, I pray you and your husband can find peace
 
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