Husband returning to Catholicism

[toadpuppy]

My husband, who is from a Catholic family and was raised in the faith early in his life, told me yesterday that he is considering returning to the Church. I was raised Protestant, and I don’t intend to convert, but I have no problem with him going back to Catholicism and raising our daughter as a Catholic as well. There are a few questions I have that he isn’t really able to answer (his family stopped going to church when he was about 8 years old).

First, will the Church recognize our marriage? We didn’t have a Catholic ceremony and I’m planning on staying a Protestant.

Second, can our daughter be baptized and raised Catholic if I don’t convert?

Third, is he going to go to hell for staying married to me?

And fourth, can I go to church with him as long as I don’t take communion?

Thanks!

 

[Kevin42]

My husband, who is from a Catholic family and was raised in the faith early in his life, told me yesterday that he is considering returning to the Church. I was raised Protestant, and I don’t intend to convert, but I have no problem with him going back to Catholicism and raising our daughter as a Catholic as well. There are a few questions I have that he isn’t really able to answer (his family stopped going to church when he was about 8 years old).

First, will the Church recognize our marriage? We didn’t have a Catholic ceremony and I’m planning on staying a Protestant.

You will probably need to have the marriage blessed by a priest. Assuming this is both yalls first marriage though, it shouldn’t be too complicated.

Second, can our daughter be baptized and raised Catholic if I don’t convert?
Yes.
Third, is he going to go to hell for staying married to me?
No.
And fourth, can I go to church with him as long as I don’t take communion?
**You are more than welcome in a Catholic Church with our without your husband. **
Thanks!

 

[Feanaro_s_Wife]

First, will the Church recognize our marriage? We didn’t have a Catholic ceremony and I’m planning on staying a Protestant.
**
If he married outside of the Catholic Church without a dispensation, no, it is not a valid marriage…but there are steps you can take to fix this. Speak with a priest. It is fine for you to remain Protestant**

Second, can our daughter be baptized and raised Catholic if I don’t convert?
**
Yes. **

Third, is he going to go to hell for staying married to me?
**
Right now, if your marriage is not valid then he could be in a serious state of sin and needs to rectify it asap… if he doesn’t, that could lead to a state of mortal sin which is him choosing hell over God.**

And fourth, can I go to church with him as long as I don’t take communion?

**Definitely. **

Thanks!

 

[puzzleannie]

First, will the Church recognize our marriage? We didn’t have a Catholic ceremony and I’m planning on staying a Protestant.

If he was baptized as a Catholic, and never formally renounced the faith, he was obligated to observe Catholic law on marriage, and should have obtained a dispensation to marry a non-Catholic. Assuming you were both otherwise free to marry at the time, all that needs to be done is convalidation, having your marriage witnessed by the Catholic priest or deacon. That need cost little or nothing and need not be any more elaborate than it sounds. It will be preceded by enough preparation to answer the types of questions you have raised here. You yourself are obligated to make no promises (other than your marriage vows of course), it is his duty to do his best to raise your children Catholic.

Second, can our daughter be baptized and raised Catholic if I don’t convert?

you are not obligated to convert, either to have your child baptized, nor to convalidate your marriage to a Catholic. If your husband takes classes to learn more about his faith, or for his own confirmation and first communion (if he still needs those sacraments) you will be invited to participate in the classes if you would like to know more about his faith.

Third, is he going to go to hell for staying married to me?

no one goes to hell unless he dies in a state of unrepentent mortal sin. yes it is objectively gravely sinful for a Catholic to marry outside the Church, but it is something easily remedied. And an individual who did not know at the time it was a grave sin does not bear that guilt. Now that he does know better, you learn together what steps to take.

And fourth, can I go to church with him as long as I don’t take communion?

Thanks!
Every Catholic Mass is a public act of worship so anyone may attend.

also, should you decide to raise your children Catholic, in due course when they prepare for sacraments, you will also be invited to take classes for parents that explain what is happening, and why, and the meaning behind it, which will answer more questions as they arise.

YOur Name seems new to me, so welcome to the forums.

 

[HappyRevert]

Welcome toadpuppy,

I’m so glad you came here to ask your questions. I have nothing instructive to add, except I wanted to encourage you and your husband in your journey. I am a revert back to the Catholic faith, so I know it is pretty momentous when you do a 180 degree turn back. You sound like you are a very supportive wife, so it is wonderful you are trying to help him as best you can. I’ll pray for both of you. Welcome!

 

[toadpuppy]

Thanks for your answers, everyone! You’ve been very helpful!

 

[Feanaro_s_Wife]

Thanks for your answers, everyone! You’ve been very helpful!

**
You’re welcome

And welcome!:tiphat:

Any other questions, just ask! I learned so much here at CAF…it’s a great community.:grouphug:**

 

[sanctamaria17]

1. You can get your marriage convalidated.
2. YES! My aunt is not Catholic but my uncle is and both their daughters are baptized Catholics and the oldest (at six) is in CCD
3. NO!
4. YES!

 

[crazyage3]

My hubby is protestant and goes to Church with us every sunday. Our daughter is baptized Catholic. And we were married in the Church.
Great for your hubby! Going to Church with him will be good for your children. It will also help if you learn some teachings to help with your child’s faith!

 

[jwashu]

I would add that if his family left the Church when he was 8 then he probably never was confirmed and may not have even had first communion (probably had the latter though).

If he was not confirmed I’m not sure that he, during the age of reason, agreed to the tenants of the Church.

Since he did not know that marrying outside the Church w/o a dispensation is a mortal sin, the it’s not a mortal sin because he didn’t have full knowledge.

I would work on getting the marriage blessed anyway, it’s a wonderful thing!

And yes you can stay a Protestant, however if he isn’t confirmed he will have to go through RCIA in which case I would suggest you join him. If for no other reason just to learn about what your child will eventually learn… you never know, you might decide to join as well

No pressure, the RCIA director shouldn’t pressure you either. I just have to say what I did because I’m a former Protestant

Joe

 

[BlestOne]

Can I just suggest that you remain open minded about converting? I know for me… my faith life is the biggest part of me and to not be able to share it with dh… well that would be difficult. If you have any questions about Catholicism you can ask…