Husband's grandfather passed away

[Cagrl]

I had posted this on the prayer intentions forum a few days ago asking for prayer because husband’s grandfather was dying. And so many of you were so kind to pray for us. And I thank you. But now I am posting here because there is an update to the situation and I need some advice. Here goes:
Update:
We just got a phone call this morning (3 a.m.) from husband’s mother who went to see her father who is out of state and she stated that he had just passed away. They called a priest to do the Anointing of the Sick because they suspected he was about to pass and sure enough he did. Please continue to pray for his soul now that he’s passed.

I have another thing that is concerning me and I need your suggestions.

We are assuming that his funeral will probably be Friday or Saturday. Well, my concern is that my sister is getting married through the Catholic Church on Saturday and both my husband and I are part of her wedding party. My husband says he is going out of state for sure for the funeral. But as for me, I am not sure what to do. Do I tell my sister about my husband’s grandfather passing and tell her that we have to leave the state for grandfather’s funeral? Or do I tell my husband I am not going with him to the funeral? What do I do?

Any suggestions and, of course, your prayers are greatly appreciated.

 

[nova147]

This is a difficult situation. I would suggest that you call your sister and talk with her about it. (Actually, maybe you should call your mother, if she is involved with the wedding planning.) Get an idea about what they think you should do. And talk with your husband about what he wants.

I will pray for your husband’s grandfather and for your family as you face this scheduling difficulty.

MJ

 

[pyropam]

Never had a wedding vs. funeral situation… I have had funerals during “fireworks” season (I am in the fireworks business). My favorite aunt died on July 1 and was burried on July 3 a few years ago. I nor most of my family could attend the funeral. Sometimes the well-being of the living will be understood by the families of those who have passed. Maybe you can pray for your husbands family while attending your sisters wedding.

Our family has sort of made a pact…Should one of us die near the 4th of July or New Years…either you are put on ice for a while or it will be an empty service. Some people think its morbid to even say these things… But, God has blessed us with this business that either makes it or breaks it 2 weeks out of the year.

God, guide this woman in the decision she has to make.

 

[Cagrl]

Thank you so much for your response. Like I said before, his grandfather and family live out of state which is Chicago and the viewing is Friday 2-8p.m. and the Funeral is Saturday at 9:30a.m. And the wedding is that same day but in California.
I am at a loss as to what to do.

 

[mommyof4]

Thank you so much for your response. Like I said before, his grandfather and family live out of state which is Chicago and the viewing is Friday 2-8p.m. and the Funeral is Saturday at 9:30a.m. And the wedding is that same day but in California.
I am at a loss as to what to do.

I’m really sorry to hear about your dilemma. I think folks would understand if you “split up” the duties, so to speak. I think that you should be in your sisters wedding, and husband go to the funeral. That way, you have a showing of support from your family at both affairs. Good luck!

 

[Indyann]

Thank you so much for your response. Like I said before, his grandfather and family live out of state which is Chicago and the viewing is Friday 2-8p.m. and the Funeral is Saturday at 9:30a.m. And the wedding is that same day but in California.
I am at a loss as to what to do.

What are your husband’s feelings on this matter? After all, he is the one you will be spending the rest of your life with, not your sister.

 

[KCT]

I’d ask hubby. If he honestly doesn’t mind you going to CA, go ahead. But if he needs support, stay with him. If your sister is mature, she will understand. —KCT

 

[Jay2]

This is tough…

It’s your sister, and his grandfather…lots of emotional ties and needs here.
If it were me I’d attend the wedding, and have my husband go to the funeral… There isn’t a decent person alive that wouldn’t understand why you needed to be with your sister, and why your DH had to be with his grand-dad.

(These are “blood” things. If it wasn’t happening on the same weekend you’d both attend both… but it just isn’t possible… so you need to take care of your commitments/obligations to your respective families)… I hope I’m making sense…

 

[lak611]

I’d ask hubby. If he honestly doesn’t mind you going to CA, go ahead. But if he needs support, stay with him. If your sister is mature, she will understand. —KCT

I would think that it would be better to attend the wedding, not the funeral. A sister is a closer relative than a grandparent. If it was your father-in-law, not your husband’s grandfather, it would be a different story. I think a sister would need more support in this case.

 

[KCT]

I would think that it would be better to attend the wedding, not the funeral. A sister is a closer relative than a grandparent. If it was your father-in-law, not your husband’s grandfather, it would be a different story. I think a sister would need more support in this case.

If a husband wants/ needs the support of his wife during a difficult time, he should have it. —KCT

 

[Indyann]

If a husband wants/ needs the support of his wife during a difficult time, he should have it. —KCT

I agree. Weddings are often video recorded. I do not personally know of a funeral being recorded, (except JPII) but I suppose it could be done.

Again, consider your husband’s feelings on the matter. Surely, your sister would understand.

 

[Cagrl]

I went ahead and talk with my husband and sister and decided to go with my husband to Chicago for the funeral. We got back yesterday evening. Thank you so much all for your attention and support to my situation.