I Am A Wreck

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Job42

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My world is kind of upside-down right now. I am more convinced than ever that there is highly organized evil or evils that are Satanic in essence and are highly influential from world-affairs to mass media to education. Whether it is the Illuminati, Freemasonry, Satanists, etc. I don’t know. Also I just put up a post about 9/11 in another thread that was very offensive… honestly I am trying to be reasonable and convince myself that 9/11 was not an inside job. Right now I am not so convinced about the 9/11 conspiracy but I am very convinced about organized evils. (Incidentally I should mention that I suffer from schizophrenia.) Anyway I just wanted to post in order to apologize for the 9/11 post, to vent a little bit, and to see if anyone has any words of encouragement for me. I am almost willing to completely let go of the 9/11 idea but I don’t want to toss the other one right now because I am more firmly convinced of that one. Finally I just want to say that although I am slightly wavering in my faith because of all this my faith is still relatively intact. I will understand if I am ignored because of my offensive 9/11 post, but I hope otherwise :o
 
I see that you recognize you have schizophrenia. From there I hope you can see that the disorder may well be coloring your interpretation of world events, in particular contributing to how you see the world as being controlled by “orgainized evils” to use your term.

Of course, no one can authoritatively recommend treatments over the internet, but I would encourage you to talk to a doctor about what’s been going on in your life, including this feeling of your world being upside-down, and see if there are treatments you aren’t currently receiving that might help turn it rightside-up again.

I didn’t see the original 9/11 post, but your honest apology shows great humility and I’m sure people will be understanding and not hold the past against you. I’ll pray for you as you carry this considerable cross.
 
Listen, take it easy. You would not believe it but a few weeks ago I went thru the same thought process, conspiracies, researching them online, and all that. Trying to figure it out. Also, I have a serious mental illness like you. This thinking and analyzing conspiracy theories had me in the E.R. the next day. OK, this is not a criticism, we can talk because I also am ill. That’s why I want to tell you these ideas may not be realistic, it may be our paranoia. If you were my best friend sitting here I would say, please, call your psychiatrist or therapist and say you are obsessing about conspiracy theories and also losing your impulse control and posting offensive messages, and then regretting doing so. OK, it could be you need an adjustment in medicine. You and I have behaved very similarly recently, and that behavior is not normal and healthy. Try to let go of these thoughts for now. Please check with a doctor even if it means going to ER or calling a Help Line.
 
My world is kind of upside-down right now. I am more convinced than ever that there is highly organized evil or evils that are Satanic in essence and are highly influential from world-affairs to mass media to education. Whether it is the Illuminati, Freemasonry, Satanists, etc. I don’t know. Also I just put up a post about 9/11 in another thread that was very offensive… honestly I am trying to be reasonable and convince myself that 9/11 was not an inside job. Right now I am not so convinced about the 9/11 conspiracy but I am very convinced about organized evils. (Incidentally I should mention that I suffer from schizophrenia.) Anyway I just wanted to post in order to apologize for the 9/11 post, to vent a little bit, and to see if anyone has any words of encouragement for me. I am almost willing to completely let go of the 9/11 idea but I don’t want to toss the other one right now because I am more firmly convinced of that one. Finally I just want to say that although I am slightly wavering in my faith because of all this my faith is still relatively intact. I will understand if I am ignored because of my offensive 9/11 post, but I hope otherwise :o
There are likely few of us who have never transgressed forum rules (I’ve been suspended at least twice) and if we all had to get ignored this forum might grind to a halt! Don’t be discouraged. My advice about the beliefs that you seem to be struggling with is simply this: ask yourself whether these beliefs are essential or important to life or salvation? If the answer is no, try to focus on (and to post about) the stuff that is.
 
My advice about the beliefs that you seem to be struggling with is simply this: ask yourself whether these beliefs are essential or important to life or salvation? If the answer is no, try to focus on (and to post about) the stuff that is.
I agree with what seekerz said. Just try to focus on your faith, getting yourself and others to Heaven and let God worry about the rest!
 
Nothing wrong with your 9/11 post!

If you have been diagnosed as schizophrenic, you should know that paranoia is one of the symptoms.

If you’re not seeing a psychiatrist now, you should find one as soon as you can, like tomorrow. Treatment for this disorder is far more sophisticated and effective than it used to be!

Keep thinking positive thoughts, because you can get through this!

👍
 
Hi,

I’m not schizophrenic and I take light from many conspiracy theories. I think they shed light of the fact that we are living in an upside-down world. “Open your eyes and see the lies right in front of you!” The only thing worse than being labeled “abnormal” is to be labeled “normal!” This world is so contrived it’s ridiculous!
 
My world is kind of upside-down right now. I am more convinced than ever that there is highly organized evil or evils that are Satanic in essence and are highly influential from world-affairs to mass media to education. Whether it is the Illuminati, Freemasonry, Satanists, etc. I don’t know. Also I just put up a post about 9/11 in another thread that was very offensive… honestly I am trying to be reasonable and convince myself that 9/11 was not an inside job. Right now I am not so convinced about the 9/11 conspiracy but I am very convinced about organized evils. (Incidentally I should mention that I suffer from schizophrenia.) Anyway I just wanted to post in order to apologize for the 9/11 post, to vent a little bit, and to see if anyone has any words of encouragement for me. I am almost willing to completely let go of the 9/11 idea but I don’t want to toss the other one right now because I am more firmly convinced of that one. Finally I just want to say that although I am slightly wavering in my faith because of all this my faith is still relatively intact. I will understand if I am ignored because of my offensive 9/11 post, but I hope otherwise :o
First off we are Catholic the true Church. Which of course was founded by our Lord Jesus Christ. We agree on that right? Good now with that said, Christ commands us to forgive our tresspasses as we forgive those who tresspass against us. SO being Catholic and Christian we are called to forgive. I posted a real bad post, I was called on it and was forgiven. So don’t worry ,you are truly sorry for it. With a disease like yours, it is understandable (charity we’re talking) that you will have a few posts that will reflect that disease. I am praying for you and that you will find healing and have peace. remember people can lead normal lives with your disease Brian Wilson (beach boys) is one that comes to mind!!!
As far as 9/11 being a conspiracy is not at all the deal. This government (not one to talk politics but am conservative and prolife all the way) can’t run a two car funeral, how could this government orchastrate such an undertaking as that. The only well run machine we have in this country is the military and they certainly would never ever bring harm to our country as most military loves this country enough to not bring harm to her but die for her. My opinion. God bless and may he heal you and you are in my prayers. Scoob.
 
Dear Job42,

There is no question that there are serious problems with the way our government operates, which I believe has unfortunately morphed into something that the founding fathers gave “their lives, their fortunes, and their sacred honor” in an effort to give us freedoms that those in control tend to try to whittle away.

For example, it is a fact and not a theory that the U.S. does not print its own money but borrows it from a private bank (the Federal Reserve, established in 1913 or 1914 under the influence of very wealthy families who then owned it) which “creates” money out of thin air by punching some buttons on their computers. Some think, and possibly rightly so, that the very wealthy (I’m not talking about garden variety “wealthy” the way certain politicians like to use the term) have undue influence over the politicians of both parties. These people allegedly don’t care who wins elections because they have so much influence over who gets nominated.

That said, I think it is wise and prudent to examine the facts that you can find about these things, because at least for me, I feel that if there is a steady movement toward some sort of Orwellian scenario – and we now have technology that is capable of bringing this about – then we owe it to our posterity to try to do something about it.

The problem is, flatly, that so many people are caught up in the game of “my team v their team” that they fail to look past partisan arguments and give honest examination to the sorts of issues that we don’t hear about from the mainstream press. I am so grateful to live in a country with a “free” press, but realistically they are going to pull their punches to some extent because if they offend certain groups of people that are newsworthy, those people will not give them priority treatment when it comes to press conferences and the like. To even try to discuss these issues is to invite being called a “kook” by others who are likely to be partisan, or worse, indifferent to the realities of politics. It will take a whole lot more people to become interested and involved to actually get any change made if change is needed, so it doesn’t pay to get worked up about it as an individual.

So yes, there are important issues that need to be attended to and although I don’t believe we have a “whole world government” – yet, anyway – we need to look past the day-to-day partisan bickering and make some decisions about how our society works that transcends the usual issues and arguments.

That said, especially with mental illness (I myself suffered for 10 years or so with severe bipolar disorder and I know how obsessed we can become over things that are out of our control) we have to keep a balance between trying to learn what we can from whatever information sources we have, to doing what we need to do for ourselves and for our families, those of us who are responsible for families. This is a priority and to become overly obsessed with politics and the like works against our ability to function. Most of these things are out of our control, and so few people even consider looking into them, that to try to effect action on them is quite futile. So basically my strategy is to keep my eyes and ears open, but to be realistic enough to know that I’m not going to change anything, and that most people are unwilling or even afraid to discuss these subjects intelligently. So especially those of us with “special needs” have to keep a strict order of priorities and stay in the here and now. Otherwise we come across as loose cannons and miss out on being happy in the here and now.

To me you come across as intelligent and caring, and I hope you do very well with your life. Learn how to let go of things you can’t control. Learn about them during times you are mentally stable but then leave it at that.

Alan
 
On EWTN’s “Women of Grace” Johnette Benkovich talks a lot about the evil in our culture (in our school systems, literature, etc.). She even talked about the evil of Freemasonry. No doubt, Freemasonry and sorcery are very powerful and can have an effect on this world of ours but remember, Job, God is much more powerful than both Freemasonry and sorcery put together. In this world we have the evil of Satan and the world to contend with, and the weeds are mixed in with the wheat. But at the end of the world Satan and all his workers will be confined to hell and all the good people will be eternally happy in heaven with Jesus. Just keep hopeful and keep persevering in faith. Live only for Jesus and trust in Him … don’t let all the evil in this world discourage you. There is plenty of evil in this world - anyone in their right mind knows this - but we are a people of faith aren’t we? and we must keep clinging to Christ and our crosses. I hope this helps!
 
A word of encouragement for you:
build up your strength in union with the Lord and by means of his mighty power.
Put on all the armor that God gives you, so that you will be able to stand up against the Devil’s evil tricks.
For we are not fighting against human beings but against the wicked spiritual forces in the heavenly world, the rulers, authorities, and cosmic powers of this dark age.
So put on God’s armor now! Then when the evil day comes, you will be able to resist the enemy’s attacks; and after fighting to the end, you will still hold your ground.
So stand ready, with truth as a belt tight around your waist, with righteousness as your breastplate and as your shoes the readiness to announce the Good News of peace. At all times carry faith as a shield; for with it you will be able to put out all the burning arrows shot by the Evil One. And accept salvation as a helmet, and the word of God as the sword which the Spirit gives you.
Do all this in prayer, asking for God’s help. Pray on every occasion, as the Spirit leads. For this reason keep alert and never give up; pray always for all God’s people.
And pray also for me 👍(Ephesians 6:10-19, Good News version)
 
My world is kind of upside-down right now. I am more convinced than ever that there is highly organized evil or evils that are Satanic in essence and are highly influential from world-affairs to mass media to education. Whether it is the Illuminati, Freemasonry, Satanists, etc. I don’t know. Also I just put up a post about 9/11 in another thread that was very offensive… honestly I am trying to be reasonable and convince myself that 9/11 was not an inside job. Right now I am not so convinced about the 9/11 conspiracy but I am very convinced about organized evils. (Incidentally I should mention that I suffer from schizophrenia.) Anyway I just wanted to post in order to apologize for the 9/11 post, to vent a little bit, and to see if anyone has any words of encouragement for me. I am almost willing to completely let go of the 9/11 idea but I don’t want to toss the other one right now because I am more firmly convinced of that one. Finally I just want to say that although I am slightly wavering in my faith because of all this my faith is still relatively intact. I will understand if I am ignored because of my offensive 9/11 post, but I hope otherwise :o
It seems this is really causing you much anxiety and torment. I recommend that maybe it would be best to take a break from thinking about all this, and simply focus on God, Jesus, Mary, Heaven, and all the good things… just focus on Him. I’m sure there are many things happening in society that are wrong and messed up, for example I read of a (Church approved) revelation from Mary saying that the freemasons would control much of society (and she told of other things that came true exactly, so that could be too). However, instead of that causing great anxiety, it’s best to just pray and focus on your relationship with God. Stay away from these types of discussions, articles, etc, - they do not help spiritually neither do they lessen the situation in the world. Even if they are true, which for all we know they could be, - at the end of the day what matters is how we live, and how we love God and neighbour. 🙂 Our Lady said at Fatima… “in the end, My Immaculate Heart will triumph”. God will win in the end 🙂 focus on that and have hope. God bless!
 
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