I am really scared right now and need to vent.....we might lose our home

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masondoggy

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I posted about this in the prayer intentions forum but I just really need to vent about this. It is way too humiliating to confide in family members and I just can’t keep it to myself any longer.

We have had a really rough year. When Jacob was a baby, he had RSV and was sick through the winter months, resulting in a long list of co-pay expenses. At the same time, DH had a slow-down at work and we fell behind in our mortgage. We tried like hell to get caught up and the bank refused to work with us (they wanted all or nothing to get caught up) but by Dec. we were in foreclosure. At that point they agreed to put us on a payment plan that practically doubled our payment for over 6 months, plus we had to use our tax refund for a massive down payment to stop the foreclosure proceedings and pay the fees for it. But they told us they’d put us in for a modification and after that went through our payment would drop. Well, every time we’d call and get the status on the modification they said it wasn’t in the system and they’d have to start it all over again. This went on all year and we finally gave up. We kept up on the payment plan but it left us with hardly any money to pay other bills so eventually we had to put our money towards keeping the utilities on etc. So now, here we are again, in foreclosure and the bank refuses to do a modification or to work with us in any way. I am sooooo angry and frustrated. We have given them so much money in the last year and it feels like we were set up for failure. All we needed was to get current and there would be plenty of room to pay all of our bills and keep current but it’s like a dog chasing his tail!

So far I’ve called a HUD housing counselor and I’m waiting for them to get back to me but in the mean time the anxiety is killing me. I’m scared to death! I can’t imagine how we would break this to the kids if we have to move! And most likely they would have to change schools because there aren’t many rental properties in our town. They would be devastated. We have worked so hard and tried to do everything right and I feel like a huge failure to my kids. Our job is to provide them with shelter and security and the rug is about to be pulled right out from under them.

I don’t want to lose my home. We moved around so much before we bought this place and it meant everything to us to finally be able to just settle down. We didn’t ask for much! We were happy to buy a modest fixer-upper. We didn’t need to go out and buy a fancy, big house like everybody else we know. We didn’t need to drive around fancy, brand new cars. We’re happy with our one five year old van. Suits us just fine. We tried to just live within our means and that was enough for us and here we are still about to lose everything.

Thanks for letting me vent…😦
 
Many prayers for you and your family. I know it sounds so cliche to hear but God has a plan and I’m sure he is working somthing up for you as you read these replies. Hold tight to your faith and trust in Him. God bless and I will pray pray pray for your family. God knows your struggles. :hug1:
 
Prayers for you. It looks like the bank is acting uprofessionally and at any rate the bank can’t load up on your money and then refuse to do what you gave them that money for. Can you contact a lawyer who will help you for free or a contingent fee?
 
chevalier said:
Prayers for you. It looks like the bank is acting uprofessionally and at any rate the bank can’t load up on your money and then refuse to do what you gave them that money for. Can you contact a lawyer who will help you for free or a contingent fee?
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The HUD counselor said that we pre-qualify for legal aid and I’m waiting for them to call me back. Apparently they have more questions to ask before determining if we qualify or not.
 
I’m really sorry you’re going through this. It is so frustrating to me that so many people are getting handouts as a reward for poor financial decisions, and others who have been dealt a lousy hand despite making sound decisions are left to the wolves.

There are still underwriting and mortgage firms around that will consider special circumstances and hopefully be able to find a way to make this work so you don’t have to lose your house.
 
I’m sorry mason:( --you’re in my prayers. I am surprised that the bank is being so stubborn, especially with the new laws that banks have put into place for people with arm loans, and so forth…so families DON’T have to go into foreclosure. I hope that there is a happy ending right around the corner for you all! Praying hard!!
 
masondoggy said:
I posted about this in the prayer intentions forum but I just really need to vent about this. It is way too humiliating to confide in family members and I just can’t keep it to myself any longer.

We have had a really rough year. When Jacob was a baby, he had RSV and was sick through the winter months, resulting in a long list of co-pay expenses. At the same time, DH had a slow-down at work and we fell behind in our mortgage. We tried like hell to get caught up and the bank refused to work with us (they wanted all or nothing to get caught up) but by Dec. we were in foreclosure. At that point they agreed to put us on a payment plan that practically doubled our payment for over 6 months, plus we had to use our tax refund for a massive down payment to stop the foreclosure proceedings and pay the fees for it. But they told us they’d put us in for a modification and after that went through our payment would drop. Well, every time we’d call and get the status on the modification they said it wasn’t in the system and they’d have to start it all over again. This went on all year and we finally gave up. We kept up on the payment plan but it left us with hardly any money to pay other bills so eventually we had to put our money towards keeping the utilities on etc. So now, here we are again, in foreclosure and the bank refuses to do a modification or to work with us in any way. I am sooooo angry and frustrated. We have given them so much money in the last year and it feels like we were set up for failure. All we needed was to get current and there would be plenty of room to pay all of our bills and keep current but it’s like a dog chasing his tail!

So far I’ve called a HUD housing counselor and I’m waiting for them to get back to me but in the mean time the anxiety is killing me. I’m scared to death! I can’t imagine how we would break this to the kids if we have to move! And most likely they would have to change schools because there aren’t many rental properties in our town. They would be devastated. We have worked so hard and tried to do everything right and I feel like a huge failure to my kids. Our job is to provide them with shelter and security and the rug is about to be pulled right out from under them.

I don’t want to lose my home. We moved around so much before we bought this place and it meant everything to us to finally be able to just settle down. We didn’t ask for much! We were happy to buy a modest fixer-upper. We didn’t need to go out and buy a fancy, big house like everybody else we know. We didn’t need to drive around fancy, brand new cars. We’re happy with our one five year old van. Suits us just fine. We tried to just live within our means and that was enough for us and here we are still about to lose everything.

Thanks for letting me vent…😦
Click to expand...
Here are a couple of other sources of help. You can call Fannie Mae to see if they own your mortgage. If they do they might be able to help you. You can also try Hope Now which is an alliance of mortgage industry entities that was set up to help people in your situation. I’ve been where you are so I know what you’re going through.

Fannie Mae Resource Center Telephone
1-800-7FANNIE
(1-800-732-6643)

Hope Now
1.888.995.HOPE
hopenow.com/

Daddums 🙂
 
I did a little research for you, masondoggy. I bet you’re really frightened right now.

Here’s what I found out, and remember- THIS IS JUST MY OWN RESEARCH- I AM **NOT **A LAWYER:
  • It takes about 6 months to process a foreclosure in Ohio. Like Illinois, you can live in the house for the time it takes all the way through the time given by the eviction notice IF you have a new owner at the sheriff’s sale.
    *You have the right to buy back before the sale is confirmed by the court.
  • Because of the backlog due to the economy, depending upon the county where you live, it can take over 300 days for everybody to be served, the case to come to court, have a judgment entered, have the house sold at sheriff’s sale, have the sale confirmed, and an eviction processed. 300 days is about TEN MONTHS. Does that make you feel a little better? I sure hope so.
    http://www.foreclosure.com/statelaw_OH.html
http://www.foreclosureuniversity.com/studycenter/foreclosurelaws/ohio.php

http://www.columbusohioreo.com/foreclosuretimeline.htm

realtytrac.com/foreclosure-laws/ohio-foreclosure-laws.asp

If it was me and I could possibly afford one, I would get a lawyer who handles foreclosures to “reason” with the mortgage company. The mortgage company is obviously not listening to you. I am hoping legal aid can offer you some sort of assistance if you can’t afford a lawyer.

ohiolegalservices.org/public/legal_problem/foreclosure/flag-ohio/qandact_view

http://www.northcountrygazette.org/2008/04/06/free_foreclosure_aid/

http://www.communitylegalaid.org/

I find I always do better when I sit down and write out a plan. Maybe you could do that, too.

IF IT WAS ME…

I would call the mortgage company AND the lawyer’s office every day, and I would set up a notebook log showing the date and time I called, with whom I spoke, what I said, and what I was told. I would send both the attorney’s office and the mortgage company a certified letter, return receipt requested, stating that I am keeping a log; that I will be calling them EVERY DAY, each of them; that I had been promised a modification, and that I had the money to bring things up-to-date; and that I was intending to be at the court hearing.

With or without an attorney, **I **would show up in court and tell the judge that I would LOVE to bring this up-to-date, but the mortgage company has stalled. Bring along any documentation I had on this, including witnesses and a log I would start keeping TODAY.

If it was moi, I would also put whatever money I planned on using to bring the mortgage up-to-date, along with the monthly mortgage payment, into a separate account, not my regular bank account, as a form of escrow. I would bring along bank statements to court to show I’ve been setting it aside.

Whether or not things went well in court, by setting aside the monthly payment and anything extra I could throw at it, I would have quite a bit of cash. If I could somehow get through to the mortgage company, I would have the money ready to pay.

If the mortgage company was still thick-headed, I would have cash to offer a private landlord when the time is up. A rental management company is going to run a credit check. A private landlord stands less of chance of running a credit check, is more likely to decide if he likes me or doesn’t, and if I have cash in hand for a deposit, an extra month’s rent or two or three or even eight in hand, I am going to have negotiating power I might not have.

But again, this is what I would do. What would you do? Think about it, and write it out. You will feel so much better when you feel that you have some control over this matter, however little it is.

I hope this helps. I will be praying for you.:console:
 
Oh, I am so sorry you have had so many struggles with your mortgage/bank. I don’t have any financial suggestions but I can relate, DH and I are nowhere near buying a house, have 1 small car, do everything on the cheap in order to pay the bills and it does hurt to see others living “better” without giving it a second thought. Big :hug1: for you and your family, Mason.
 
I am so sorry this is happening to you. And unfortunately, what the bank did and is doing to you is their normal procedure.

OK, I am going to make a suggestion that you don’t want to hear but I need to say it. I understand that you dont’ want to move and I understand your emtional ties to this house but if I were you, I would put the house up for sale yesterday. A house is a thing, it’s not your family. It is obvious that you can’t afford it and since it’s been like that for the last two years it’s probably not going to change. It would be better to sell the house and move out peacefully than being forced out by a foreclosure notice. Hopefully you have some equity in it and selling your house would be all you need to do. Selling your house would be a lot better for you financially than a foreclosure.

ALso, Clark Howard is a talk show host who helps folks figure financial stuff out. There is a forum associated with his radio show. Clark doesn’t answer the forum but there are folks on the forum who are very smart who might be able to give you some financial ideas to help you out. Go to this link clarkhoward.com/p/boards/ch/wwwthreads.pl?Cat= and joing the forum and post your question over there. Post it on the Dump Your Debt, General Discussion or the Real Estate sections. Some very informed folks over there might be able to give you some ideas on what you can do.
 
Daddums said:
Here are a couple of other sources of help. You can call Fannie Mae to see if they own your mortgage. If they do they might be able to help you. You can also try Hope Now which is an alliance of mortgage industry entities that was set up to help people in your situation. I’ve been where you are so I know what you’re going through.

Fannie Mae Resource Center Telephone
1-800-7FANNIE
(1-800-732-6643)

Hope Now
1.888.995.HOPE
hopenow.com/

Daddums 🙂
Click to expand...
Thanks! I’ll check it out. Something I haven’t thought of yet…

I did look into the HOPE program and it looks like the catch is that the gov’t owns part of the equity in your home. If you ever sell, FHA gets up to 50% of the equity in your home and from what I understand there’s no time limit on that. No thanks. I’d rather live under a bridge than give the feds permanent ownership stake in my home that I’M paying for. What a crock. :mad:
 
OutinChgoburbs said:
I did a little research for you, masondoggy. I bet you’re really frightened right now.

Here’s what I found out, and remember- THIS IS JUST MY OWN RESEARCH- I AM **NOT **A LAWYER:
  • It takes about 6 months to process a foreclosure in Ohio. Like Illinois, you can live in the house for the time it takes all the way through the time given by the eviction notice IF you have a new owner at the sheriff’s sale.
    *You have the right to buy back before the sale is confirmed by the court.
  • Because of the backlog due to the economy, depending upon the county where you live, it can take over 300 days for everybody to be served, the case to come to court, have a judgment entered, have the house sold at sheriff’s sale, have the sale confirmed, and an eviction processed. 300 days is about TEN MONTHS. Does that make you feel a little better? I sure hope so.
    http://www.foreclosure.com/statelaw_OH.html
http://www.foreclosureuniversity.com/studycenter/foreclosurelaws/ohio.php

http://www.columbusohioreo.com/foreclosuretimeline.htm

realtytrac.com/foreclosure-laws/ohio-foreclosure-laws.asp

If it was me and I could possibly afford one, I would get a lawyer who handles foreclosures to “reason” with the mortgage company. The mortgage company is obviously not listening to you. I am hoping legal aid can offer you some sort of assistance if you can’t afford a lawyer.

ohiolegalservices.org/public/legal_problem/foreclosure/flag-ohio/qandact_view

http://www.northcountrygazette.org/2008/04/06/free_foreclosure_aid/

http://www.communitylegalaid.org/

I find I always do better when I sit down and write out a plan. Maybe you could do that, too.

IF IT WAS ME…

I would call the mortgage company AND the lawyer’s office every day, and I would set up a notebook log showing the date and time I called, with whom I spoke, what I said, and what I was told. I would send both the attorney’s office and the mortgage company a certified letter, return receipt requested, stating that I am keeping a log; that I will be calling them EVERY DAY, each of them; that I had been promised a modification, and that I had the money to bring things up-to-date; and that I was intending to be at the court hearing.

With or without an attorney, **I **would show up in court and tell the judge that I would LOVE to bring this up-to-date, but the mortgage company has stalled. Bring along any documentation I had on this, including witnesses and a log I would start keeping TODAY.

If it was moi, I would also put whatever money I planned on using to bring the mortgage up-to-date, along with the monthly mortgage payment, into a separate account, not my regular bank account, as a form of escrow. I would bring along bank statements to court to show I’ve been setting it aside.

Whether or not things went well in court, by setting aside the monthly payment and anything extra I could throw at it, I would have quite a bit of cash. If I could somehow get through to the mortgage company, I would have the money ready to pay.

If the mortgage company was still thick-headed, I would have cash to offer a private landlord when the time is up. A rental management company is going to run a credit check. A private landlord stands less of chance of running a credit check, is more likely to decide if he likes me or doesn’t, and if I have cash in hand for a deposit, an extra month’s rent or two or three or even eight in hand, I am going to have negotiating power I might not have.

But again, this is what I would do. What would you do? Think about it, and write it out. You will feel so much better when you feel that you have some control over this matter, however little it is.

I hope this helps. I will be praying for you.:console:
Click to expand...
Really great suggestions! Thank you!
 
I really hate to keep syaing this but I really think you should consider selling your house. If you haven’t been able to afford the mort payments in two years why do you think you can afford them now? I know there are organizations that can help you out but that only fixes right now, what happens a year from now?

If you sell your house, YOU are in charge of what happens. IF you don’t and it goes into foreclosure you are giving up all that equity and the bank gets it.
 
noclevername said:
I am so sorry this is happening to you. And unfortunately, what the bank did and is doing to you is their normal procedure.

OK, I am going to make a suggestion that you don’t want to hear but I need to say it. I understand that you dont’ want to move and I understand your emtional ties to this house but if I were you, I would put the house up for sale yesterday. A house is a thing, it’s not your family. It is obvious that you can’t afford it and since it’s been like that for the last two years it’s probably not going to change. It would be better to sell the house and move out peacefully than being forced out by a foreclosure notice. Hopefully you have some equity in it and selling your house would be all you need to do. Selling your house would be a lot better for you financially than a foreclosure.

ALso, Clark Howard is a talk show host who helps folks figure financial stuff out. There is a forum associated with his radio show. Clark doesn’t answer the forum but there are folks on the forum who are very smart who might be able to give you some financial ideas to help you out. Go to this link clarkhoward.com/p/boards/ch/wwwthreads.pl?Cat= and joing the forum and post your question over there. Post it on the Dump Your Debt, General Discussion or the Real Estate sections. Some very informed folks over there might be able to give you some ideas on what you can do.
Click to expand...
But the thing is that we can afford the home if we can just get stinkin’ caught up. There were bad times that messed us up, but circumstances are much different now. DH got a promotion and makes more money now, leaving a greater cushion for unforseen expenses. Our credit is already trashed. If we sell it could be years before we can buy another home and that’s a lot of money down the tubes in rent.

I understand what your saying and it’s definitely something to think about. But aside from emotional ties, I think we’ll be worse off financially in the long run by selling and renting for years on end and then have nothing to show for it. If I thought for one minute that we’d get out of this and still not be able to afford it, I’d cut my losses in a heartbeat. I am the type that needs financial sanity and I certainly don’t want to wind up in this stressful situation again, kwim?
 
noclevername said:
I really hate to keep syaing this but I really think you should consider selling your house. If you haven’t been able to afford the mort payments in two years why do you think you can afford them now? I know there are organizations that can help you out but that only fixes right now, what happens a year from now?

If you sell your house, YOU are in charge of what happens. IF you don’t and it goes into foreclosure you are giving up all that equity and the bank gets it.
Click to expand...
There really isn’t much equity. In this market, we’d probably break even.
 
I don’t know if this will help you, but according to my local TV station Bush has issued a moratorium on foreclosures for the holidays. They are trying to work out a deal to extend it. Obama says that he will extend it for 12 months, but he isn’t in office yet.
There is a program that my ex-husband applied for from the government. He was given a temporary hiatus on his mortgage payments.
 
Galnextdoor said:
I don’t know if this will help you, but according to my local TV station Bush has issued a moratorium on foreclosures for the holidays. They are trying to work out a deal to extend it. Obama says that he will extend it for 12 months, but he isn’t in office yet.
There is a program that my ex-husband applied for from the government. He was given a temporary hiatus on his mortgage payments.
Click to expand...
Thanks, I didn’t know about this. It would be a relief to have time to work out a solution.
 
Galnextdoor said:
I don’t know if this will help you, but according to my local TV station Bush has issued a moratorium on foreclosures for the holidays. They are trying to work out a deal to extend it. Obama says that he will extend it for 12 months, but he isn’t in office yet.
There is a program that my ex-husband applied for from the government. He was given a temporary hiatus on his mortgage payments.
Click to expand...
Do you have links for the moratorium? All I am finding is news articles that it was proposed but didn’t make it. :confused:
 
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