I am scared and so confused!

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Hi,

I am Amy and I am 17. I found my faith a few months ago, and I have been going to confession. I am scruptulous, and I confess sins that I am not sure of if it’s mortal or venial. My question is on the sin of presumption. Is this sin when someone relies on God’s faith to save them if they commit a mortal sin, and they willingly commit the mortal sin? I confessed this at my last confession 2 weeks ago, and I am going to confession again this weekend. I also feel like I am not repenting for my sins, I pray the Rosary everyday, and say all my prayers. After I go to confession I do my penance then am I suppose to repent for all those sins? I am so confused and I am frightened because I feel like I’m not repenting for my sins. Or am I repenting when I do my penance? Do you need a act of perfect contrition to be forgiven of sins while in confession? :confused: I went to my first confession and confessed mortal sins, because I was afraid to go to Hell, and now I go to confession whenever I feel like I need to go or if I feel I have offend God by doing a sin. And also to commit the sin of presumption you need this to: a person might look to have his sins forgiven without adequate penance. What does this mean can anyone tell me? Does it mean you aren’t doing penance for your sins after you confess them? I just don’t know what do to and I am so scared, I am almost crying as I type this because I am so confused and scared.😦 I feel like now all my sins I have confessed aren’t forgiven because I don’t understand the presumption of sin it confuses me, and I feel I have commited this everytime I go to confession, and I don’t make perfect acts of contrition. Please can someone help me I don’t know what to do about this. Are perfect acts of contrition required to be forgiven of sin while you’re in confession?:confused: If you know of a priest who can help me on the forums please tell him I am desperate for help. I feel so stupid about all this stuff and not understanding it.😊
 
Hi,

I am Amy and I am 17. I found my faith a few months ago, and I have been going to confession. I am scruptulous, and I confess sins that I am not sure of if it’s mortal or venial. My question is on the sin of presumption. Is this sin when someone relies on God’s faith to save them if they commit a mortal sin, and they willingly commit the mortal sin? I confessed this at my last confession 2 weeks ago, and I am going to confession again this weekend. I also feel like I am not repenting for my sins, I pray the Rosary everyday, and say all my prayers. After I go to confession I do my penance then am I suppose to repent for all those sins? I am so confused and I am frightened because I feel like I’m not repenting for my sins. Or am I repenting when I do my penance? Do you need a act of perfect contrition to be forgiven of sins while in confession? :confused: I went to my first confession and confessed mortal sins, because I was afraid to go to Hell, and now I go to confession whenever I feel like I need to go or if I feel I have offend God by doing a sin. And also to commit the sin of presumption you need this to: a person might look to have his sins forgiven without adequate penance. What does this mean can anyone tell me? Does it mean you aren’t doing penance for your sins after you confess them? I just don’t know what do to and I am so scared, I am almost crying as I type this because I am so confused and scared.😦 I feel like now all my sins I have confessed aren’t forgiven because I don’t understand the presumption of sin it confuses me, and I feel I have commited this everytime I go to confession, and I don’t make perfect acts of contrition. Please can someone help me I don’t know what to do about this. Are perfect acts of contrition required to be forgiven of sin while you’re in confession?:confused: If you know of a priest who can help me on the forums please tell him I am desperate for help. I feel so stupid about all this stuff and not understanding it.😊
 
reader16 said:
Hi,

I am Amy and I am 17. I found my faith a few months ago, and I have been going to confession. I am scruptulous, and I confess sins that I am not sure of if it’s mortal or venial. My question is on the sin of presumption. Is this sin when someone relies on God’s faith to save them if they commit a mortal sin, and they willingly commit the mortal sin? I confessed this at my last confession 2 weeks ago, and I am going to confession again this weekend. I also feel like I am not repenting for my sins, I pray the Rosary everyday, and say all my prayers. After I go to confession I do my penance then am I suppose to repent for all those sins? I am so confused and I am frightened because I feel like I’m not repenting for my sins. Or am I repenting when I do my penance? Do you need a act of perfect contrition to be forgiven of sins while in confession? :confused: I went to my first confession and confessed mortal sins, because I was afraid to go to Hell, and now I go to confession whenever I feel like I need to go or if I feel I have offend God by doing a sin. And also to commit the sin of presumption you need this to: a person might look to have his sins forgiven without adequate penance. What does this mean can anyone tell me? Does it mean you aren’t doing penance for your sins after you confess them? I just don’t know what do to and I am so scared, I am almost crying as I type this because I am so confused and scared.😦 I feel like now all my sins I have confessed aren’t forgiven because I don’t understand the presumption of sin it confuses me, and I feel I have commited this everytime I go to confession, and I don’t make perfect acts of contrition. Please can someone help me I don’t know what to do about this. Are perfect acts of contrition required to be forgiven of sin while you’re in confession?:confused: If you know of a priest who can help me on the forums please tell him I am desperate for help. I feel so stupid about all this stuff and not understanding it.😊
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My dear, you needn’t worry. I can tell you have a loving heart from what you have written. If your intention is to be forgiven in the confessional, then your sins are indeed forgiven! 😃 Perfect contrition is the goal for all of us, but it is difficult to attain. Most of us continue to have imperfect contrition for sin, even though they are forgiven in the Confessional. Penance is to help alleviate that attachment, and lead us to perfection. In the end, if you still have some attachment to sin, like most of us will, God’s mercy affords us Purgatory, when He will remove all of those stains forever so you can be a perfect heavenly creature. 🙂

It is good practice to go to regular confession, and you can have assurance that you are in the grace of God. In time, you will become stronger and have better contrition, you will see. Grace is imparted to us in the confessional. At your young age, you are doing outstanding to ask these questions and be willing to confess and do penance! 🙂

I don’t know of a priest here off-hand, so maybe someone else can advise you there. But I would not worry. I would keep doing what you are doing! Also remember to pray. Ask God to comfort you and have mercy on your heart which is confused. Ask for understanding. He will give it to you. Ask our Blessed Mother to comfort you. I will pray for you as well!
 
you might find this link useful: Examination of Conscience
MarcoPolo said:
If your intention is to be forgiven in the confessional, then your sins are indeed forgiven! 😃 Perfect contrition is the goal for all of us, but it is difficult to attain. !
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← I agree. and from the looks of it…you are in earnest, so you are fine 👍 (i wish i were more like you!) …but better get advice from a priest - he’s more knowledgable than me.

But, try to let go of your sins once you confessed them. God forgives and forgets. This reminds me of a story that I read somewhere before…tried looking for it but cant find it (maybe someone in this forum can find it).

But, it basically goes likes this (bear with me, i am not a story teller 😃 )
  • There was this man who committed a terrible sin. Even after he went to confession and obtained forgiveness, he was not able to forget that sin. He became extremely religious (or did good acts?) but could not forget this sin he did when he was young. One day he prayed to God (or he met God…can’t remember) and asked if God remembered the sin he commited as a youngester. God said to him (or was it God’s messenger?) he can’t remember.
Simple yet I like it :).
 
You do NOT need to make an act of perfect contrition in order to be forgiven through confession/reconciliation. Through the sacrament, you are forgiven even if your contrition is imperfect.

As for repenting, I would say that you show repentance by being sorry for having committed your sins and going to confession and confessing them.

If you go to confession and are truly sorry for your sins (whether having perfect OR imperfect contrition), confess all those mortal sins that you can recall that you ahve committed since your last confession, and perform the pennance given to you by the priest, then you will be forgiven of your sins.

God is merciful and forgiving. We are taught that if we are truly sorry for our sins, He will forgive us if we make a good and honest confession. To presume that this is true is not sin. It is accepting Church teaching. I am not entirely sure where the sin of presumption comes in, but from what I gather from your post and what I know of Church teaching, I would guess that this would happen when you assume that God will forgive you of your sins even if you are not sorry for them and/or do not confess them (if they are mortal).

I hope this helps.
 
I too have been in your spot. I was reconciled into the Church just over 17 months ago. I was at a point where I thought that everything that I did was a sin and potentially a mortal sin. Here is a list of things that I have been doing to help with this.

First, I try to go to the same priest confessor. This builds a relationship and allows the priest to provide better guidance to you.

Second, I try to ensure that I have done a thorough examination of my conscience. There are many tools that can help with this. The one I prefer is by Fr. Corapi (fathercorapi.com/)). He has a CD/DVD titled “How to make a good confession” that walks a person through a good examination of conscience, basically walking a person through the Decalogue as found in the Catechism. Once you’ve done this for awhile, you become aware of the grave sins and begin to steer clear of the near occasion of those sins. Think of it as building a house. You wouldn’t start building a house unless you were sure you had a firm foundation. A good examination of conscience is the foundation of a good confession. Really put some time into this. I usually write down those sins that my conscience is aware of while going through the 10 commandments in the Catechism.

Third, don’t be so hard on yourself. The first time that I did an examination of conscience I filled an entire front side of notebook paper and half of the back. (Talk about being scared to enter the confessional! :eek: In terms of adequate penance, perform the penance that you and the priest agree on. That is adequate penance. Through the authority given to the priest by the Church, he can bind or loose your sins in the confessional. After you confess, make a good act of contrition and are absolved if you perform the assigned penance, you’re done, your sins are gone.

Fourth, Once you go to confession, are given your penance, receive absolution, and perform your penance, burn the piece of paper that you brought into the confessional with you. Your sins have been absolved. They’re gone. God does not only forgive all of your sins, but he also forgets them. Fr. Corapi says it like this. Sin is a nail and your soul is a board. Confession removes the nail from the board, but there is still a hole that needs to be healed. This will take time. Ask for the intercession of your patron saint, the Blessed Mother, your guardian angel, the poor souls in purgatory to help you heal. The good doctor of souls, Jesus, will give you the grace that you need to get through this.

Last, don’t worry at all about perfect vs. imperfect contrition in the confessional. Imperfect contrition is absolutely adequate for absolution in the confessional. Also, confessing venial sins in the confessional when you are not aware of any mortal sins on your soul is also encouraged. The Church recommends and applauds frequent receipt of the Sacrament of Penance and the Eucharist.

CJ
 
Amy first of all take a deep breath. Felt good didn’t it? God is loving and merciful and is always ready and quick to forgive. He is not waiting to catch you at a bad moment and cast your soul into hell.

Next decide to go to confession to the same priest as much as possible. Tell him just what you have written in your post and ask his help. If he doesn’t take the time to help you seek a different priest who is willing to take the time to help. If possible you might ask if you can make an appointment to see him so there is sufficent time to work things through which isn’t always possible when others are waiting to confess. If you fear doing this pray to the Holy Spirit to reinforce the virtues of fortitude and courage given to you in Baptism and Confirmation.

Take heart. There was a time when I went through what you are experiencing. There will come a time when you will have confidence in God’s love and mercy and be at peace.

You will be in my prayers. ****
 
Amy, I know how you feel, having been in that spot myself. Pray that God grant you a spiritual director. Seek out a priest who is orthodox and HOLY, and ask him to take you under his wing. Before confession, pray. Confession for us begins at 4 so I pray the Chaplet of Divine Mercy that I (and others) make a good confession, but also that He give light to the priests to guide us. Keep praying, keep trying. Pray for perseverence and wisdom. I will pray that our good Lord will provide you with a holy priest to shepherd you personally. You also, Precious, will be in my prayers. Entrust yourself to the hearts of Jesus and Mary.:hug1:
 
Dear Amy,

Though I happen to not be a priest, I am studying to be one, so maybe I can help a little.
Like the person before me said, your repentance is the fact that you were sorry for your sins and went to confession. After absolution, you do not(and definately should not) need to go on being hard on yourself for sins that have already been absolved. The only thing to be done about the sins that have already been confessed is to try to learn from them. You MUST understand that no amount of repentance is ever enough for us to make up for our sins. But the Good Lord grants us the forgiveness that we do not deserve. None of us ever deserve it, and we can’t do anything to make ourselves worthy of it. It is a gift from God and the only thing we can do is lovingly ACCEPT HIS MERCY. Do not go on punishing yourself for past sins. They are FORGIVEN and you don;t need to go on worrying about making up for them. Please don’t fall into that trap. The devil tries to convince us that we arent really forgiven after confession, but we are through the sacrifice of Christ on the cross.

Presumption is referring to people assuming that God will forgive them of their sins when they are not sorry for them. Because we must be sorry for our sins for them to be forgiven** This does not have to involve perfect contrition, our Loving God knows that we are a fallen people and he accepts imperfect contrition. Focus on the mercy of God, and accept it. We all feel like we haven’t done enough to repent for our sins, and thats because we haven’t. And we couldn’t even if we wanted to. But God knows this and forgives us anyways. Your sins are forgiven, they were as soon as the priest said the words of Absolution. Don’t worry about what you have done in the past, your past is forgiven, just learn from it and try to help your future.

I hope this helps,
-Daniel
 
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