I am the only person who can't stand the secular aspect of Christmas

[pianistclare]

My coworkers and I all hate “team-building activities”. They are always super lame. We’re grown people, for crying out loud, we don’t want to play charades, pass a ball of yarn and tell our deepest secrets, or try to guess which celebrity is written on a sticky-note on our forhead. I don’t know why bosses don’t seem to get that the secret to good team-building is free food! Seriously! Ditch the yarn and the trust falls and lets go out to lunch already!

The times that our workplace did those team building ropes courses and seminars…the management always stood away from the action, with their arms folded, like they were expecting us to be “cured” any moment! After all, that 's what the brochure promises!!!


But I get Cat’s point…

Our current pastor is a big fan out taking us out to lunch twice a week. God bless him.

 

[Allegra]

Allegra,

You’re brilliant.

I think there’s a corporate training franchise in this idea.

I’d have to have a pretty fancy lawyer in order to patent the idea of office potlucks.

 

[Xantippe]

I’d have to have a pretty fancy lawyer in order to patent the idea of office potlucks.

See if you can patent “Secret Santa” while you’re at it.

 

[Lost_Wanderer]

I’d have to have a pretty fancy lawyer in order to patent the idea of office potlucks.

See if you can patent “Secret Santa” while you’re at it.

comes back with food bag from office party So what I miss? munches Mmm… pizza.

 

[pianistclare]

comes back with food bag from office party So what I miss? munches Mmm… pizza.

we gathered around the kettle and sang “kumbaya”

 

[Allegra]

See if you can patent “Secret Santa” while you’re at it.

Eugh! No thanks. I hate Secret Santa. Someone always messes it up and someone doesn’t get their gift. Keep it simple folks. Bring some Rotel dip. Have a soup contest. Have a cookie exchange. January is “Crockpot Awareness Month”. Good food = office harmony. Chubby workers are happy workers.

 

[pianistclare]

Eugh! No thanks. I hate Secret Santa. Someone always messes it up and someone doesn’t get their gift. Keep it simple folks. Bring some Rotel dip. Have a soup contest. Have a cookie exchange. January is “Crockpot Awareness Month”. Good food = office harmony. Chubby workers are happy workers.

tru dat.

 

[Kelfa28]

Eugh! No thanks. I hate Secret Santa. Someone always messes it up and someone doesn’t get their gift. Keep it simple folks. Bring some Rotel dip. Have a soup contest. Have a cookie exchange. January is “Crockpot Awareness Month”. Good food = office harmony. Chubby workers are happy workers.

“Crockpot awareness month”

I agree with you big time. When I was still working as a paramedic a couple of moons ago I would have to work Thanksgiving a lot and the occasional Christmas and Easter. What always brightened our day was our management putting together a big Thanksgiving dinner and the Doctor’s at the ER setting out platters of both sweets and lunches. That was welcomed with open arms and it always made the day a bit easier.

Hubby just made a comment next to me….“you know what’s better? Sending us home early with pay!”
The military does this sometimes too…lots of burger burns during the summer. Instant moral booster!

 

[Sarcelle]

Just to give an alternative view, I personally know of at least one or two people who say they’re being ‘observant Christians’ as an excuse for authentically Scrooge-like behavior. There are many cultures (including mine) who are simply structured to bring people out of their shells. Refusal, in turn, is actually taken as a cultural offense.

Just my two cents.

Now that you mention it, I think cultures in Asia do not have the concept of the individual. The focus is usually on the community as a whole. I observed thus when I was in Japan.

 

[Cat]

My coworkers and I all hate “team-building activities”. They are always super lame. We’re grown people, for crying out loud, we don’t want to play charades, pass a ball of yarn and tell our deepest secrets, or try to guess which celebrity is written on a sticky-note on our forhead. I don’t know why bosses don’t seem to get that the secret to good team-building is free food! Seriously! Ditch the yarn and the trust falls and lets go out to lunch already!

I can understand your feelings towards team-building activities that are “required” by corporate management.

That’s not what I was talking about in my post. I used the words “your co-workers’ little impromptu activities.”

I doubt very much that the snowflake-cutting was mandated by corporate management. It sounds to me like something that the co-workers started just for grins during a slack time in the workday (common during the holiday season).

What anglewannabe has to recognize is that these impromptu activities started by co-workers ARE “team-building activities,” and she needs to participate in some way so that she will be perceived as a “team-player.”

As I said, she doesn’t have to cut the snowflakes, but she should at least stop by the table and say, “Wow, those are really cute! You’all are so creative!”

Here’s an example of an impromptu co-worker’s “team-building” activity. Last week, we were all so stuffed with candy and cookies at work that I said, “We should have a salad potluck next week to try to recover from all these calories.”

I had the weekend off, and when I came in this morning, the sign-up sheet was up on the bulletin board for our “Salad Potluck” this Wednesday. (I’m bringing chopped celery, carrots, and shredded cheese–all leftovers from my Christmas meal purchases!).

Upper management didn’t mandate this. It was entirely conceived and created by co-workers. If the truth were told, I don’t really love salad, and I usually eat my lunch alone to get some “away time” from the work environment.

But you betcha that I will participate in this Salad Potluck, and it will do my body AND my Annual Review good. I am a team player when it comes to doing the work AND when it comes to joining my co-workers for their “impromptu little activities.”

 

[Cat]

I’m certainly a skeptic, too, when it comes to some of those team-building activities that were obviously purchased from someone who is making money creating these things.

I think what we all need to remember is that unless we are required to sin, we should take a deep breath and say, “I love my job and my salary, and I want to keep my job and my salary.”

It won’t kill any of us to sing KumBaYah sitting around a company logo that our "Diversity Group " of co-workers just created out of natural materials that we all gleaned from a “Discovery Walk” around our company building, or to recite our company Mission Statement while standing in a circle holding hands with all our co-workers that we have just affirmed with “positive statements.”

If we don’t want to play these games with our team, there are plenty of other unemployed people out there who would willingly not only sing Kumbayah, but act it out while wearing face paint and feather boas.

Management doesn’t always think like worker bees. We think we’re doing a great job because we’re on time and staying caught up on the work. Meanwhile managers are shaking their heads over our unwillingness to come to the company volleyball team’s games.

Words to the wise. Don’t lose your job because you prefer to “be sincere” and skip the activities that you think are a waste of time.

 

[Anglewannabe]

That’s not what I was talking about in my post. I used the words “your co-workers’ little impromptu activities.”

I doubt very much that the snowflake-cutting was mandated by corporate management. It sounds to me like something that the co-workers started just for grins** during a slack time **in the workday (common during the holiday season).

What anglewannabe has to recognize is that these impromptu activities started by co-workers ARE “team-building activities,” and she needs to participate in some way so that she will be perceived as a “team-player.”

I don’t know about your office, but in mine, different people have different busy times. It was NOT a slack time for me at all. And my manager will ALWAYS out meeting a deadline over impromptu ‘snow flake cutting’. I have had slow times where I had ‘impromptu ideas’ that I though would be fun. And others who were busy or just found my idea boring did NOT have any problem telling me so.

There is a fine line between ‘impromptu team building’ and ‘immature lazy worker’. But that is not the point of this original thread. The point was, I find Christmas a hard time and all the ‘buzz of excitement’ around it hard.

Angie

 

[Xantippe]

I don’t know about your office, but in mine, different people have different busy times. It was NOT a slack time for me at all. And my manager will ALWAYS out meeting a deadline over impromptu ‘snow flake cutting’. I have had slow times where I had ‘impromptu ideas’ that I though would be fun. And others who were busy or just found my idea boring did NOT have any problem telling me so.

There is a fine line between ‘impromptu team building’ and ‘immature lazy worker’. But that is not the point of this original thread. The point was, I find Christmas a hard time and all the ‘buzz of excitement’ around it hard.

Angie

Maybe what you need to master is pausing for a millisecond and saying wistfully and (a little hypocritically), “Wow! That looks really fun! It’s too bad I’ve got this deadline!”

 

[Anglewannabe]

Maybe what you need to master is pausing for a millisecond and saying wistfully and (a little hypocritically), “Wow! That looks really fun! It’s too bad I’ve got this deadline!”

That is definitely one good approach but it would me a LOT hypocritical

 

[Cat]

That is definitely one good approach but it would me a LOT hypocritical

That’s what I was trying to tell you in my earlier posts–it’s good to be “insincere” if it solidifies your position as a member of the team.

The kind little phrase that Xantippe suggested would take you only a few seconds to say, and it would tell your co-workers that you appreciate and LIKE them (even if you don’t!), and it would tell your manager that you like your co-workers (even if you don’t) and at the same time, that you are aware of the importance of the deadlines and that you’re working to finish the tasks.

There’s a balance, anglewannabe. Being “nice” is not hypocritical. There are many many times in my workday (hospital) where I want to tell the person on the other end of the phone to “look up the SOP in the manuals,” but I would never, ever do that. Is that hypocritical of me? Of course not. It’s polite and kind.

In fact, many times on the phone, I am thinking, “This person is an idiot,” but I say, “Don’t feel foolish–lots of people ask that same question!” I am telling an outright, bald-faced LIE to the person on the other end of the phone–is that hypocritical? Should I be completely sincere and tell them the truth–that they’re idiots for not looking up the answer in the company manuals instead of bothering me when I’m busy?

NO, it’s not hypocritical, and even if it IS hypocritical, it’s the right thing to do! It’s polite and kind–it’s very important that we affirm our customers/co-workers and try to put them at ease and help them to find the answers they are searching for. Telling them that I think they’re idiots would be the completely sincere and honest thing for me to do, but it would be wrong and incredibly rude and hostile, and I would rightfully be fired for it.

In the same way, you need to temper your sincerity and honesty with kindness and empathy. Again, if you aren’t able to learn to be a team player by fraternizing with your co-workers, watch out for your job. There are lots of people out there who are very willing to make the deadlines AND cut out snowflakes.

Again, there’s a balance. If you’re running around with an armload of papers and folders while you’re co-workers are sitting around a table giggling and cutting out snowflakes, and you ignore them or make some kind of disparaging comment implying that they’re just goofing off while you do all the work, you will turn them against you, and that will come back to haunt you. It’s not your job to give them work assignments–that’s the manager’s job. If the manager is unhappy with their snow-flake cutting party, he/she will tell them so. You are right to do your work, but you really need to acknowledge your co-workers and let them know that you’re part of their team, even if you can’t join in their snowflake-cutting right now. It’s a social skill, and don’t scoff at it. You need to keep both your manager AND your co-workers on your side. Tick off either of them, and you may lose your job.

I hope this is helpful to you and others.