I attended my first Mass today

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BensFaithJourney

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I attended Mass for the first time today (I have been to a Catholic funeral, wedding, and cousin-in-law’s confirmation, but never just a regular Mass). I’ve been contemplating my beliefs for quite awhile, and one thing has been prohibiting me from making the jump is my relationship. I am married (it’s a long story, but we were both atheists when we married, and although she was born and raised Catholic, our wedding was not done within the Catholic Church). I know if I become religious, especially Catholic, it will put a big strain on our marriage. A few days ago I decided I needed to attend if I want to ever figure out what I believe and what I want to do. I looked up Churches in my city that would have services at times I could attend, and I found one for 8:15 AM today. I got up, got dressed and headed out.

When I got there, I found a place to park on the street (there was no parking lot that I saw) with 5 or 6 other cars, some of which had Catholic bumper stickers letting me know I wouldn’t be alone. I walked into the building and it was PACKED. I was very surprised. Where were all the cars? And then I realized 3/4ths of the people were kids (I didn’t notice until I left that there was a Catholic School right across the street)! I sat down near the back where some adults were, and just watched. I didn’t know any of the prayers, but I stood when everyone else stood, sat when everyone else sat, etc. I now feel that I should’ve knelt when they knelt, but that was around the time of Communion, and not knowing how this all works I didn’t want to look like I was trying to partake as I am not Catholic.

The Priest was talking today about Saint Lucy. I didn’t know her story coming into today, but from what I gathered, she was strong and stood with God in the face of persecution. The Priest prayed that we all can stand with God even when it will cause trouble. This seems so incredible to me that this was the message of today, when I am going through a situation where standing with God will undoubtably cause major problems. Not martyr level, like Saint Lucy, but problems nonetheless.

Once it all ended, the woman I sat next to turned to me and said “I’ve never seen you at Mass before, I’m Jean.” I told her how I came to come today, without going into too much detail on how long I’ve been going back and forth, asking questions, and reading. She invited me to come back, and said that if I had any questions that I could ask her. She was super kind, and made me feel a lot less out of place than I previously felt.

I really am not sure how to feel. I keep thinking of Saint Lucy’s story, and although the Priest prayed for her intercession, I have asked for it myself too, although I don’t know how that all works to be completely honest (do I pray to her, just talk to her, ask her to pray for me?).

Anyways, I wanted to share that story with you all. I don’t know if I’m looking for advice, encouragement, or answers to some questions. Thanks for taking the time to read this!
 
I’m glad your first Mass went well and that you met a friendly person. I hope you will come to more Masses on your faith journey.

For now, you can just say, “St. Lucy, pray for us” or “St. Lucy, pray for me”. If you wish to talk to her further, you can, but it isn’t required.
 
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So glad you went to Mass today and had a good experience. I hope you want to go back?
I’m in a similar situation to you - a (now ex) atheist with an atheist partner who still doesn’t know I go to Mass…I’m in the early stages of converting.
If you feel like going back to Mass then go, if you feel like praying then go with it - the Holy Spirit will guide you. Just roll with it and see where He takes you.
 
Congratulations on your first Mass. I’m glad you meet a friendly person to chat with and I hope you are encouraged in your faith journey. It’ll take a few more visits before you get the “rhythm” of the Mass and a few more after that to learn the responses. Don’t feel discouraged about what you don’t know yet, the depth of the Church can be overwhelming, so just incorporate it in one small step at a time. I entered into the Church twelve years ago and I’m still learning about new devotions, prayers and traditions almost daily. It’s not necessary that I follow all of them, or most of them, but it’s comforting to know that God, through his Church, offers us what we need at that moment to help us grow stronger in our faith.
 
I’m really happy to hear things went well. I hope you keep coming. There’s no set speed on this process so don’t worry too much about not knowing the next steps.
 
Are you coming from Protestant?
If you persevere into Catholic Church it might be a bumpy road, but it will be worth it in the end.
Just remember, whatever it’s not clear to you why this why that, know that many many smart people were pondering on those questions for the last 2000 years so try to understand before anything else
 
Blessed be God! Congratulations on your first mass! As you attend more and more, you’ll pick up certain queues for when to sit, stand etc and learn the responses.

When it comes to prayer and the saints, you can simply ask any particular saint to pray for you. I’d also highly recommend finding your patron saint because it’s great to have someone in heaven supporting us!
 
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St. Lucy–Santa Lucia–is the saint of Light, and light often signifies wisdom, the Light of Christ. She is a wonderful saint to pray to for light in terms of one’s direction in life. She is especially venerated in Italy (she is one of Dante’s rescuers in The Divine Comedy–she gives him direction) and in Sweden, where young girls wear a wreathe of candles on their heads and serve breakfast to the family on St. Lucy’s festival.
I’m glad you had a good experience! Try Sunday Mass next!

en.wikipedia.org

Saint Lucy - Wikipedia

en.wikipedia.org en.wikipedia.org
 
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I was raised Church of Christ, so today was way different than what I experienced every Sunday. I grew up thinking Catholics were bad. Not even real Christians, worshipped Mary and the Pope, etc. I see all the misconceptions for what they are now, though. It’s amazing how much hate is out there for this Church.
 
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I also “crossed the Tiber” from Church of Christ to the Catholic Church 20+ years ago. Happy to help orient things if I can.
 
It’s a lot to get used to. The concepts of Saints, Real Presence, Apostolic Succession…it’s a lot. But I’m taking it slow and will be doing a lot of prayer.

How long did it take you to “get used to” Catholicism?
 
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I am a recent convert (RCIA, confirmation at Easter). There is a lot of information to process. I liken it to learning a new language. Everyone learns differently so choose a learning path that works for you. Me, I read the Catechism before I attended my first Mass or sat down to talk to Father. But I am overly analytical. That’s me. My RCIA instructor turned me on to formed.org. you can get a subscription for about ten dollars a month. I devoured their content and I am sure you will find some good answers there. All that being said, the thing that really brought me to a Catholic understanding was/is Mass. As often as I can attend, nearly every day. I am finally home. I will pray you get here too.
 
Good question and a tough one… the Mass was easy for me; I was already on that path and just didn’t know it. I studied feverishly and learned as quickly as I could on the surface so I could blend in, but it took a couple of years even after fully joining the Church before I felt like I wasn’t having these big “ah ha” moments all the time about things.

The Marian doctrines and Saints took a while longer, but only because I was indifferent to it. Once I started really opening myself up to learning about their stories and how people ‘carry’ these devotions in different ways in their lives, I found my own way. In some respects, I’m probably still rather Protestant about it by some people’s standards — I don’t do rosaries all that often, but instead prefer Liturgy of the Hours or more scripture-heavy prayers and devotions (but I’m open to it - and that’s the key, I think). I had to find the attribution of Mary that made the most sense to me, which was Our Lady of Providence (the shrine is in my archdiocese, but the concept of Providence has become extremely significant in my life).

Learning never quite ends, and that’s ok; good, in fact! The biggest getting used to item for me was letting the family and friends around me adjust. That simply took time and letting them see the good my faith was doing in my life. Edit to add: even my former C of C minister who used to try hard to “save” me from my “hellbound mistake” eventually got back to friendly, neighborly terms where we could just have nice chats about faith, family, community, etc.
 
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I, too, am a former Church of Christ member and entered the Church a little over a decade ago. If I can help in any way just let me know.
 
Me personally immediately after I accepted and that no other religion can make more sense I was bestowed with grace and courage to continue. But my situation was different than yours. Fulton Sheen is the one who helped me accept Catholic fully. Listen him on youtube
 
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I have what might be a weird question. Do you talk out loud to them? Or in your head? Same with Mary, God/Jesus etc.

Growing up we could pray to God either way but idk if that was just what we did, and maybe Catholics do things differently?
 
Catholics can do things either way. We can talk to saints and Mary out loud, or we can just talk in our heads. We can pray out loud, or just pray mentally. I think a lot of people do some of each.

Catholics are more likely to pray out loud when they are either in the privacy of their homes, or perhaps in a prayer group like Charismatics that encourages people to pray out loud. Some Catholics are not comfortable doing this and others aren’t comfortable doing it in front of others, partly because we are taught not to make a show of ourselves when we pray and it seems “showy” to many.

The Catholic Church in USA was heavily influenced by European immigrant cultures that tend to regard quiet and silence as respectful and reverent, and expect people to be quiet or silent in church.
However, there are other cultures in other countries where prayer and worship are more vocal, and they are starting to creep into US parishes here and there.
Also in the Church over the last few decades, there has also been an approved and growing Catholic Charismatic movement which emphasizes vocal prayers, similar to Baptists and Pentecostals.

You will probably see some parishes with more vocal prayer than other parishes, just depending on the culture of the parish and the preferences of the priest there.
 
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This is a lovely story.

When you pray for a saint’s intercession, you can either recite existing prayers to that saint, or you can talk to that saint in your normal conversational manner. Remember, the saint was and is human.

Mary has several prayers that can be said to her, but I like to feel I can also talk to her conversationally. The recited prayers are to help those who don’t quite know how to say what’s in their hearts. Often the existing prayers will say it for them.

I hope you continue going to Mass. And if your spouse was once a Catholic, maybe your conversion will inspire her to return to the Church.

Thank you for sharing this.
 
I forgot to add – should both of you decide to convert to/return to Catholicism, you can then renew your marriage vows in the Church. All you need do is consult with the priest, and he should be able to instruct you on how to do that. If it’s the first marriage for both of you, it should be quite simple.
 
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