I can't come to terms with this

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MarianD

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I can’t accept that these people are going to Hell:

My mother for being unapologetic about having me and my brother by my father while they were and still are fiancees.

My friends, some of whom are really nice people, for leaving Christianity.

Honestly, these people are great people. Without my mother, I’d obviously be nothing. Without these friends, the good times I enjoy with them would not exist. But how could it be fathomable that these amazing people are going to Hell while some of these other Christians are going to Heaven even though they make my stomach churn.

Hopefully God will be merciful. I know He’s just, and I know that what is just isn’t bringing some cold-hearted “Christians” into Heaven and sending the best people I know to Hell because they simply didn’t know the wrongs they did. Or is He this just? I don’t know, and I can’t come to terms with it. Can anyone help me here?
 
MarianD said:
I can’t accept that these people are going to Hell:

My mother for being unapologetic about having me and my brother by my father while they were and still are fiancees.

My friends, some of whom are really nice people, for leaving Christianity.

Honestly, these people are great people. Without my mother, I’d obviously be nothing. Without these friends, the good times I enjoy with them would not exist. But how could it be fathomable that these amazing people are going to Hell while some of these other Christians are going to Heaven even though they make my stomach churn.

Hopefully God will be merciful. I know He’s just, and I know that what is just isn’t bringing some cold-hearted “Christians” into Heaven and sending the best people I know to Hell because they simply didn’t know the wrongs they did. Or is He this just? I don’t know, and I can’t come to terms with it. Can anyone help me here?
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Who is to say they are definitely going to hell? Only Christ is the judge. We have been given instructions on what to do and what not to do but ultimately with a reason only known to Himself, God can grant mercy on souls and let them into heaven. We don’t know who is indeed in hell, and the only ones we know who are in heaven are the saints (I’m counting the people who lived on earth only). Besides the recognized saints there may be many more saints who are not recognized on earth.
 
MarianD said:
I can’t accept that these people are going to Hell:

My mother for being unapologetic about having me and my brother by my father while they were and still are fiancees.

My friends, some of whom are really nice people, for leaving Christianity.

Honestly, these people are great people. Without my mother, I’d obviously be nothing. Without these friends, the good times I enjoy with them would not exist. But how could it be fathomable that these amazing people are going to Hell while some of these other Christians are going to Heaven even though they make my stomach churn.

Hopefully God will be merciful. I know He’s just, and I know that what is just isn’t bringing some cold-hearted “Christians” into Heaven and sending the best people I know to Hell because they simply didn’t know the wrongs they did. Or is He this just? I don’t know, and I can’t come to terms with it. Can anyone help me here?
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We do not know who is in hell.

Just cause a mortal sin appears to be committed…does not mean it was …nor once it was committed does it not mean that such was not repented of and the person given life…

(and some have invincibelly ignorant consciences on certain matters)

God judges each accordingly…

and can offer his grace etc in ways we never see…

Jesus desires the salvation of all…he will not force us…but he can give grace in ways we on the outside never see…even in the last moments.
 
Spirithound said:
What makes you think these people are getting into Heaven?
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Because believing in Christ and not committing a moral sin/being forgiven of a mortal sin is all you need. The coldness, unkindness, etc. can all be purged in Purgatory. The final destination is still Heaven.
 
And read what our Judge, Jesus, says in Matthew 25 verses 31-46 about those who do live lives of practical kindness! Thankfully, Jesus is the judge of souls… and we certainly must accept the words of Jesus, the divine Son of God.
 
MarianD said:
Because believing in Christ and not committing a moral sin/being forgiven of a mortal sin is all you need. The coldness, unkindness, etc. can all be purged in Purgatory. The final destination is still Heaven.
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You can’t know the state of their consciences.

God does. He is perfectly just.

Something to be careful about: claiming that someone is basically a “good” person. Compared to whom?

No one is good when compared to God himself.
 
broconsul said:
Something to be careful about: claiming that someone is basically a “good” person. Compared to whom?
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To God Himself. Jesus said many things about love, caring for others, etc. These people do these things and are kind-hearted people, but they lack one major thing: faith. My mother isn’t included in this group since she is a faithful Baptist, but my Atheist/apathetic Agnostic friends are included.
 
I don’t like any of that either, tell you the truth. There are athiests and agnostics who are in heaven while other some other christians are in grave danger.

When someone lectures you about where another person is headed to for their eternal destination, you can politely ask them “Hey, are you God? Have you been to Heaven? No? Then shut up and mind your own buisness.”
 
MarianD said:
Because believing in Christ and not committing a moral sin/being forgiven of a mortal sin is all you need. The coldness, unkindness, etc. can all be purged in Purgatory. The final destination is still Heaven.
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Not necessarily, remember the clanging gong!
 
MarianD said:
I can’t accept that these people are going to Hell:

My mother for being unapologetic about having me and my brother by my father while they were and still are fiancees.

My friends, some of whom are really nice people, for leaving Christianity.

Honestly, these people are great people. Without my mother, I’d obviously be nothing. Without these friends, the good times I enjoy with them would not exist. But how could it be fathomable that these amazing people are going to Hell while some of these other Christians are going to Heaven even though they make my stomach churn.

Hopefully God will be merciful. I know He’s just, and I know that what is just isn’t bringing some cold-hearted “Christians” into Heaven and sending the best people I know to Hell because they simply didn’t know the wrongs they did. Or is He this just? I don’t know, and I can’t come to terms with it. Can anyone help me here?
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And what to do about this is to pray that they come into union with the Church. That is what friends do for each other…

We know only the way that Christ taught us to get to Heaven. Knowing that, we fear for those who do not follow that path and pray that they will see the error of their ways.

At the same time, however, we hope that God will grant them mercy, because only He can judge what is in a person’s heart. We can see how *we *would grant them mercy, so we can hope that God will also.

We ought not to judge the apparently cold-hearted Christians either, and we should pray for them as well. Just because someone is a Christian does not mean that he or she is getting into Heaven!

And we should work hard to improve our own holiness as well, because maybe we won’t finish the race ourselves!
 
MarianD said:
To God Himself. Jesus said many things about love, caring for others, etc. These people do these things and are kind-hearted people, but they lack one major thing: faith. My mother isn’t included in this group since she is a faithful Baptist, but my Atheist/apathetic Agnostic friends are included.
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But remember that Jesus is perfect in every way, and everyone else you know is not.

Also remember Jesus said the most important commandment is to love God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength. THEN comes loving your neighbor as yourself. Mk 12:28-31
 
MarianD said:
My friends, some of whom are really nice people…
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LOL you think nice = going to heaven? I know a “nice” man who deserves to burn in hell for all eternity, Marian. Do you really think good and evil are that simple?
 
I wonder about what the op said myself sometimes. Sometimes I just say that you have to follow in Jesus’s likeness (what he did) to make it into heaven. I’m sure that if someone isn’t catholic because of a misinformed notion of catholicism or it’s teachings, but are actually catholic in their heart without realizing it, they would be shown mercy. There is no excuse for ignorance, but that doesn’t mean there can’t be pardon. Though I’m no expert in scripture or the church’s teachings that is my personal opinion and if I’m wrong please correct me. Like I said there’s no excuse for ignorance but there can be pardon, including if I’m being ignorant now.
 
We don’t have to speculate about the salvation of others, or second-guess God about any of that. It doesn’t do us any good, and may even cause us to think we know better than Him.

Trust Him! He is perfect mercy and justice. Be at peace, and allow Him to sanctify you because He deserves all your love.
 
MarianD said:
I can’t accept that these people are going to Hell:

My mother for being unapologetic about having me and my brother by my father while they were and still are fiancees.

My friends, some of whom are really nice people, for leaving Christianity.

Honestly, these people are great people. Without my mother, I’d obviously be nothing. Without these friends, the good times I enjoy with them would not exist. But how could it be fathomable that these amazing people are going to Hell while some of these other Christians are going to Heaven even though they make my stomach churn.

Hopefully God will be merciful. I know He’s just, and I know that what is just isn’t bringing some cold-hearted “Christians” into Heaven and sending the best people I know to Hell because they simply didn’t know the wrongs they did. Or is He this just? I don’t know, and I can’t come to terms with it. Can anyone help me here?
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You don’t have to accept it my dear friend, you can pray for them, they are still here, their lives are not set where they are, if God is allowing them to live, it is because they still have hope, and because you see and care that there are problems in their lives that may prevent them from getting to heaven, whereas others do not, then perhaps God has given you a special grace, so that you can help Him to bring them to Him, God works through us, so perhaps God does not mean to worry you, but instead to encourage you,

you can help them by prayer, by example, and by words if you are able,
good example i think is most important, as saint Vincent Ferrer said, “Preach often, and when necessary, use words”
but to be a good example, we must pray, and read good Catholic books, and make use of the sacraments,
the idea is to bring Gods love into your heart, so much, that it overflows, and pores out onto all those around you, we must be channels of Gods love, and carry Christ in our hearts, so that it is not you that others see, but Christ in you,
pray to God to cleanly and carefully pull out the roots of sin in your heart, and to plant seeds of virtue, and then work with Him to nurture those seeds, with the Eucharist, Confession, mortification, penance, prayer, fasting, works of mercy, spiritual reading, etc.
it is by the blood of Christ that the virtues grow, and by the cross that they climb.

Heaven is a place where we go to love God for all eternity, so that is why we must help others to love God, because if they do not love Him, they may not even want in…

but don’t worry, put them all in Gods hands, and just do what you can, you can’t do anything more than that, just do your best and never give up, there is alot of hope, because with God, all things are possible.
you are beautiful for caring for your friends and family so much, but remember that God loves them more, so He will most certainly be willing to do whatever He can to help them, so just pray, and trust in Him…and be patient, God will do it His way, which is not always what we want, but it is always the best way.

ok? i hope this helps, take care.
 
Apollos said:
LOL you think nice = going to heaven? I know a “nice” man who deserves to burn in hell for all eternity, Marian. Do you really think good and evil are that simple?
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By “nice”, I mean people who donate to charities, start charities and movements, do what they can to end wars, wish to make a difference, go out of their way to help others, help the homeless on the street by giving them money after the last 100 people ignored them, devote their lives to service, etc. I don’t mean holding doors, I mean doing this many Christians are unfortunately too lazy to do.

It’s unfortunate that your “nice” man deserves to burn in Hell, but the nice people I know deserve Heaven more than I do. I’d quickly jump into Hell to make sure these people go to Heaven, even though I’d hate myself for doing so. They just deserve it so much more than others.
 
Thank you everyone for your responses so far.
Apollos said:
Based on what you know about God, how do you think he decides who goes where?
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Based on Christ’s 2 Commandments:

#1: Love God with all your strength etc.
#2: Love your neighbor as yourself.

Those who succeed in both go to Heaven. Those who partly succeed in the 1st and partly fail in the 2nd (or vice-versa) go to Purgatory. Those who fully fail one or both of them seem to go to Hell unless they didn’t know better.

But my question is for the person who succeeds in the 2nd and fails in the 1st. They’re failure in the 1st isn’t because they hate what’s good (the opposite is shown in their succeeding in the 2nd) but because, for some reason, they just can’t accept God and/or His Laws.

By the way, this extends to friends of mine who are non-Christian but not Atheist. I have a Muslim friend who I call a Saint because everything he does is 90% in accordance to God’s Laws in Catholicism, except the kid isn’t Catholic and refuses to accept Jesus, so the other 10% is in those areas of belief and in Mass and other Catholic-specific rules.
 
Apollos said:
LOL you think nice = going to heaven? I know a “nice” man who deserves to burn in hell for all eternity, Marian. Do you really think good and evil are that simple?
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i just want to add, that we all deserve hell, and no one deserves heaven, we only get to heaven by Gods love and mercy.
and only God knows the state of a soul and the intentions of a heart, so no matter what we think of someone, we don’t know what’s inside them, and cannot judge them that way, and are actually commanded not to.
 
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