I can't get close to God

[Hope_Philomena]

I have a fear of male authority figures, I have a negative father complex, etc. God is the authority, He is the father. And I’m having a hard time trusting and loving Him because of this. I would be much more comfortable if God was considered female, and I know that’s a foolish and irrational thought, but I just am more comfortable with mothers. I appreciate Mary very much because of this, but in the end, it’s God we are supposed to worship, not Mary. I’m slightly more comfortable with Jesus, but that’s because he feels younger. It’s the older male figures that I’m afraid of. I’m even more comfortable with the angels, strangely; it doesn’t make sense, but it’s how it is for me. And I feel terrible for seemingly loving Mary and the angels more than I love God.

It’s stupid of me to be afraid, I know, but it is a wall that I can’t climb over it seems. The negative and false stereotype that Christianity hates women doesn’t help either. I know it’s not true, but the irrational side of me can’t push away the thought that I don’t belong in Christianity. Because of my fear and lack of love, I feel like I will never have a relationship with God. And I’m not sure what to do.

 

[tawny]

Praying to the Holy Spirit to give you guidance, direction, strength, fortitude & wisdom in your time of need.

 

[oldgraymare2]

Hi Hope Philomena,

You might want to think about seeing a Spiritual Director for help. They are there to help us when we need it with our spiritual lives.

I went for Spiritual Direction myself, when I felt like I needed some help and guidance.

The first time that I went, I went to talk to a nun who had a background in Spiritual Direction. I was referred to her, by someone that I knew.

The next time that I needed help, I went and talked to my pastor, at the time. He was available to help me.

There are different kinds of Spiritual Directors, such as nuns, priests, and lay people, too.

You can ask your parish priest/pastor for help, and you can also call your Archdiocese Office to ask about a list of recommendations of Spiritual Directors, too.

 

[Frankenfurter]

God gave us the analogy that he is our Father. Many people have a strong loving relationship with their Father and so can relate to God when he tells us he is like a Father.

But God is also the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit is the one that wants to relate directly to you.

You might find it more comforting to have a relationship with the Holy Spirit.