I can't have communion... it's ripping me up inside... what should I do?

[Zundrah]

I want to get formal and informal advice on this…

I unfortunately had to stop my RCIA classes because my evening college classes ran over its time slot. I can’t quit the college classes because it is only two days a week anyway, and if I skip it for RCIA I will be thrown out because it is exactly halve of the course… I have to wait until next time… over a year!

I want to take communion. I want to have the Eucharist. I want to be part of the Lords communion. I feel like if the angel of death came… or the Lords second coming, that I will be left to die - just like the Egyptian oppressors.

I am so upset about this that it makes me feel like a sinner when people of my parish are having their dip in the Lords cup and yet I am left at the pew like a stranger… as if I don’t know Christ. As if I am unworthy to recieve him.

They all had to eat the lamb, they had to consume it or else they died. So many friends try to console me about this but to no avail. I know that God himself is stopping me from recieving Christ redemptive death. He is holding me back, and I don’t like it.

I am an outcast, because even Judas had his share in Christ, but not me.

I saw a thread here yesterday, a woman was complaining that her protestant friends were coming to her parish and recieving communion even though they only saw it as symbolic…
I thought to myself, even they get it! I wish I was there at that Parish…

What should I do? I haven’t even been to confession yet, for the first time.

 

[Lizziebel]

I’m so sorry that you’re going through this! By calling you to wait, God surely has an important reason. And that reason is for your good, not ill. God desires the salvation of all.

My only advice would be to pray, trust God’s plan for you, and to offer up this suffering for the benefit of all whom you might help by this spiritual grace. I’m guessing you’ve already discussed the situation with your RCIA director and the priest, and there’s no way to make other accommodations like switching the class day/time or receiving RCIA by private instruction?

My prayers are with you in this time of trial.

 

[Brenda_V]

May I suggest you talk to your Priest about your conflict in time? He may have a suggestion to help you complete your RCIA this year! He may allow you to do much of the learning on your own and just question you before you make your confession of Faith, become Confirmed and Receive Jesus for the first time!

Brenda V.

 

[Zundrah]

May I suggest you talk to your Priest about your conflict in time? .

This is what I was advised by a friend, but the thing is I have only been going to my church for 6 months now and my priest knew I was protestant because I told him. I really feel that he wont take me as seriously as I am taking it…

He may have a suggestion to help you complete your RCIA this year!

He gave me a prayer book which also teaches you about the meaning of communion, but I have researched far more than they could ever tell me anyway. That’s why I am so agitated. I have Scott Hahns books and CD’s which I never lay to rest!

He may allow you to do much of the learning on your own and just question you before you make your confession of Faith,

I wish it was this simple, but he is always in a hurry and too mild to take me seriously. In RCIA he would speed up the lessons by rushing through his answers even though I wanted to know soooo much more!

become Confirmed and Receive Jesus for the first time!

Brenda V

Aw, this is my dream.

(Lizzie, I’m coming to you)

 

[Zundrah]

I’m so sorry that you’re going through this!

I am too, it sometimes makes me scream!

By calling you to wait, God surely has an important reason.

That is what I thought at first (after getting over the idea that I thought he was punishing me), but what is it that he is wanting of me during this time? More honest devotion? Is he taking pleasure in my desire for communion? He must be loving it. I almost feel angry!

And that reason is for your good, not ill. God desires the salvation of all.

It is for good yes, but the wait I can see ahead is making me feel so distant from ever having communiuon. It’s like looking out at the ocean from a ship; there seems to be no land.

My only advice would be to pray, trust God’s plan for you, and to offer up this suffering for the benefit of all whom you might help by this spiritual grace.

Pray, yes, my rosary, in my hands and devote to him, like a nun. I love it, that will keep me going thankfully. When people have taken their communiuon, I go straight to the sacred heart on my knees and pray about my comfirmation.

I’m guessing you’ve already discussed the situation with your RCIA director and the priest,

Yes, they were upset, as was I.

and there’s no way to make other accommodations like switching the class day/time or receiving RCIA by private instruction?

I thought they would since I was the only one there who actually needed comfirmation! But no, they didn’t… I was gutted, utterly gutted.

My prayers are with you in this time of trial.

Thankyou Lizzie, it felt good to get this off of my chest at last.

 

[newyorkcatholic]

I want to get formal and informal advice on this…

I feel like if the angel of death came… or the Lords second coming, that I will be left to die - just like the Egyptian oppressors.

–

As if I am unworthy to recieve him.

I saw a thread here yesterday, a woman was complaining that her protestant friends were coming to her parish and recieving communion even though they only saw it as symbolic…
I thought to myself, even they get it! I wish I was there at that Parish…

First of all, God knows your intentions. If you die as a catechumen or candidate desiring baptism (or to confess if you are already validly baptised), you can be saved. As St. Thomas’ prayer says (paraphased) the Eucharist is the Heavenly Banquet but under the veil of the sacrament in this life … so you will not miss out!

Second, you ARE unworthy to receive him. We all are! If you took Communion at another parish, you would eat and drink condemnation upon yourself. Those Protestants who are taking Communion are playing with fire, and you should not want that.

A Catholic who understand the Church’s teaching will never take Communion when not in the state of grace (no mortal sin), and your state is similar to this until you are brought into the Church. Be inspired by the sacrifice of these Catholics, and persevere!

 

[Zundrah]

First of all, God knows your intentions. If you die as a catechumen or candidate desiring baptism (or to confess if you are already validly baptised), you can be saved. As St. Thomas’ prayer says (paraphased) the Eucharist is the Heavenly Banquet but under the veil of the sacrament in this life … so you will not miss out!

Second, you ARE unworthy to receive him. We all are! If you took Communion at another parish, you would eat and drink condemnation upon yourself. Those Protestants who are taking Communion are playing with fire, and you should not want that.

A Catholic who understand the Church’s teaching will never take Communion when not in the state of grace (no mortal sin), and your state is similar to this until you are brought into the Church. Be inspired by the sacrifice of these Catholics, and persevere!

Sigh, I know. But can you imagine having to wait a whole year before you can ever take communion again? It is a long time…

 

[ljubim]

Sigh, I know. But can you imagine having to wait a whole year before you can ever take communion again? It is a long time…

Oh my gosh I always thought you were already Catholic!! You sure act like one of us

Maybe you can talk to your priest about this, about how your soul is longing to receive Christ in the Eucharist. If you’re only missing two weeks of classes… I don’t see how this is a big deal. Maybe you can do some research on your own and he can talk with you about it to make sure you understand.

I am so sorry You definitely should talk to the priest about it. I mean if you sound anything like you do on the forums then he should be convinced of your Catholic-ness!

 

[rep140]

You should call the rectory and make an appointment to speak with your pastor about your situation. He has all the discretion in the world in a matter such as yours. If you make an appointment he will know how serious you are.

Believe me, if you have been a regular at Sunday Mass your pastor knows it aand I’m sure he will bend over backwards for you.

Make that appointment!

 

[Marie5890]

Is there any reason why your RCIA class cant be held on Sundays either prior to, or after Mass?

Surely one of your RCIA catechists can acommedate your schedule?

I know, as an RCIA catechist in my parish, we do what we can to reach the needs of our candidates.

Talk to the director of RCIA in your parish.

This really shouldnt be an obstacle IMO.

 

[Zundrah]

Oh my gosh I always thought you were already Catholic!! You sure act like one of us

Maybe you can talk to your priest about this, about how your soul is longing to receive Christ in the Eucharist. If you’re only missing two weeks of classes… I don’t see how this is a big deal. Maybe you can do some research on your own and he can talk with you about it to make sure you understand.

I am so sorry You definitely should talk to the priest about it. I mean if you sound anything like you do on the forums then he should be convinced of your Catholic-ness!

Heh, well… you made me blush! I don’t know what to say…

You should call the rectory and make an appointment to speak with your pastor about your situation. He has all the discretion in the world in a matter such as yours. If you make an appointment he will know how serious you are.

Believe me, if you have been a regular at Sunday Mass your pastor knows it aand I’m sure he will bend over backwards for you.

Make that appointment!

I might do it, but I feel awkward because they never offered to change the day… and it has been going on for months now. RCIA must have gone on a bit since. When does it finish? Easter?

Is there any reason why your RCIA class cant be held on Sundays either prior to, or after Mass?

Surely one of your RCIA catechists can acommedate your schedule?

I know, as an RCIA catechist in my parish, we do what we can to reach the needs of our candidates.

Talk to the director of RCIA in your parish.

This really shouldnt be an obstacle IMO.

I only wished that they would have arranged a time for me when my college classes aren’t on. I remember telling them that I couldn’t attend anymore. I’m more than certain that they think I was making excuses not to attend. Unfortunately.

 

[kage_ar]

There is more than one RCIA program in London.

If I could only find one, and I had to choose between Jesus and a college class, I would choose Jesus. College would take a back seat to Jesus - that is what I would do.

 

[YADA]

Sigh, I know. But can you imagine having to wait a whole year before you can ever take communion again? It is a long time…

Many people have to wait - fr longer then a year - to receive our Lord …

and I know this from personal experience …My spouse and I having participated - as fully as we could - at Mass - every Sunday and Holy day plus some daily Masses and not received for nearly two years - while we worked to get our marriage recognized … Hard it is … but not for naught …

I also had a friend - never married - who fell in love with a divorced catholic … they married.

This couple attended mass for over thirty years [he attended daily - her health - when I met them - breast cancer - kept her from daily attendance nd often other times]. her ex used to stay with them when he came to visit her son’s family and she never considered an anullment …

This couple loved each other and they loved Jesus … when her husband died, they finally had they marriage blessed - were able to receive the Sacrament of Confession and come to the Table of the Lord … over thirty years but neither of them would have considered partaking of the Lord’s Body … very old school they were - even after they would not receive unless they had gone to onfession that week [and I am very sure they weren’t committing mortal sins every week!]

In the catechumenate of the early church the period of instruction was generally three years or longer … So take heart … there are parishes that are modeling this for the unbaptized … a three year catechumenate … there are plusses and minus … a topis outside of this thread …

Now for my advice on your particular situation … Is there a nearby parish that offers RCIA at a time that does not conflict with your classes? … You could attend this parish instead of the parish you have been attending … I am assuming that you have been in the RCIA since last fall [attending the sessions] and this is a new development for the Winter Term … so you current parish can vouch for your formation leading up to the transfer … If this is an issue from September then you are very late in seeking alternatives … as most Annual [as apposed to the parishes that run year round programs] RCIA formation follow the schooll year September to June and 3 plus months of formation have passed …

Look to a nearby parish with a different RCIA night and God’s Blessings on your Journey Home …

 

[Zundrah]

There is more than one RCIA program in London.

If I could only find one, and I had to choose between Jesus and a college class, I would choose Jesus. College would take a back seat to Jesus - that is what I would do.

…you know, this is still an option… But if I just got up and left the college then they wouldn’t let me back in next year!

RCIA has been going on since july 7th, so I am a bit late…

 

[Marie5890]

I’m more than certain that they think I was making excuses not to attend. Unfortunately.

Why would they think that?

Talk to them. Everyone pull out their calenders and find a time when you arent in class and they can meet with you.

You DO Have to go thru RCIA. That is a given. Sacrifices can be made to make sure you fulfill the needed obligation to go thru it so you can come into full communion.

This, again IMO, should not be a real obstacle.

It’s not like you are trying to wriggle out of RCIA. You just have a conflict with your courses. That is legit.

Im sure a do-able compromise can be found for all concerned.

This really shouldnt be a serious and unresolvable problem. And I say that as an RCIA catechist.

 

[ProVobis]

Is it too late to consider a Catholic college?

 

[JohnMPhilomena]

It is all dependent on what priest you have. Mine is a saint. He gave me some books to read, met with me a few times, heard my confession, had my first communion, and a couple months later I was confirmed. So I would definately talk to your priest. (And say some prayers to St John Vianney first - patron saint of priests). He heard my confession long before our parish priest did.

Of course he also knew that I had been married to a devout Catholic for 25 years, so I already knew quite a bit.

Peace,
John Marie Philomena

 

[Zundrah]

Many people have to wait - fr longer then a year - to receive our Lord …

and I know this from personal experience …My spouse and I having participated - as fully as we could - at Mass - every Sunday and Holy day plus some daily Masses and not received for nearly two years - while we worked to get our marriage recognized … Hard it is … but not for naught …

I also had a friend - never married - who fell in love with a divorced catholic … they married.

This couple attended mass for over thirty years [he attended daily - her health - when I met them - breast cancer - kept her from daily attendance nd often other times]. her ex used to stay with them when he came to visit her son’s family and she never considered an anullment …

This couple loved each other and they loved Jesus … when her husband died, they finally had they marriage blessed - were able to receive the Sacrament of Confession and come to the Table of the Lord … over thirty years but neither of them would have considered partaking of the Lord’s Body … very old school they were - even after they would not receive unless they had gone to onfession that week [and I am very sure they weren’t committing mortal sins every week!]

In the catechumenate of the early church the period of instruction was generally three years or longer … So take heart … there are parishes that are modeling this for the unbaptized … a three year catechumenate … there are plusses and minus … a topis outside of this thread …

Now for my advice on your particular situation … Is there a nearby parish that offers RCIA at a time that does not conflict with your classes? … You could attend this parish instead of the parish you have been attending … I am assuming that you have been in the RCIA since last fall [attending the sessions] and this is a new development for the Winter Term … so you current parish can vouch for your formation leading up to the transfer … If this is an issue from September then you are very late in seeking alternatives … as most Annual [as apposed to the parishes that run year round programs] RCIA formation follow the schooll year September to June and 3 plus months of formation have passed …

Look to a nearby parish with a different RCIA night and God’s Blessings on your Journey Home …

Three years… three years? Three years!? I think I would just die…

I will call a nearby Parish… and see what happens…

Thank you YADA.

 

[Zundrah]

Is it too late to consider a Catholic college?

Catholic College? I’ve never heard of it. I’ve heard of bible college but that is a protestant thing…

It is all dependent on what priest you have. Mine is a saint. He gave me some books to read, met with me a few times, heard my confession, had my first communion, and a couple months later I was confirmed. So I would definately talk to your priest. (And say some prayers to St John Vianney first - patron saint of priests). He heard my confession long before our parish priest did.

Of course he also knew that I had been married to a devout Catholic for 25 years, so I already knew quite a bit.

Peace,
John Marie Philomena

I only wish my priest would do this for me. I would be eternaly grateful. You are so very lucky.

 

[peary1]

I want to get formal and informal advice on this…

I unfortunately had to stop my RCIA classes because my evening college classes ran over its time slot. I can’t quit the college classes because it is only two days a week anyway, and if I skip it for RCIA I will be thrown out because it is exactly halve of the course… I have to wait until next time… over a year!

I want to take communion. I want to have the Eucharist. I want to be part of the Lords communion. I feel like if the angel of death came… or the Lords second coming, that I will be left to die - just like the Egyptian oppressors.

I am so upset about this that it makes me feel like a sinner when people of my parish are having their dip in the Lords cup and yet I am left at the pew like a stranger… as if I don’t know Christ. As if I am unworthy to recieve him.

They all had to eat the lamb, they had to consume it or else they died. So many friends try to console me about this but to no avail. I know that God himself is stopping me from recieving Christ redemptive death. He is holding me back, and I don’t like it.

I am an outcast, because even Judas had his share in Christ, but not me.

I saw a thread here yesterday, a woman was complaining that her protestant friends were coming to her parish and recieving communion even though they only saw it as symbolic…
I thought to myself, even they get it! I wish I was there at that Parish…

What should I do? I haven’t even been to confession yet, for the first time.

I suppose some priest may tell you that because of your intent on joining the Church, it would be ok to receive the Eucharist. However, this is not how things are supposed to be done.

I also think that you are way over the edge on this if your posting is a valid concern. You are being scrupulous to an unhealthy extent.

Protestants have no business coming to Mass and receiving the Eucharist. As St. Paul says, those who partake of the Body and Blood of Christ and are not in unity of Faith reap a serious reprehension and condemnation from God Himself. Their intentions are neither good nor productive for their own spiritual welfare.

So, it takes a year. Deal with it. You can always receive a blessing from the priest, though you may need to discuss the situation with him. You can receive a spiritual communion simply by asking the Lord to come into your heart during reception and by remaining in your seat.