I didn't come here to be entertained by you or your child!

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Cat said:
That’s really kind of weird.

But perhaps–just a thought–perhaps it took them a long time to have their children. Perhaps the mom experienced several heartbreaking miscarriages–one of my friends had three miscarriages before she was finally able to have her first child (and she had two more beautiful children).

That would explain why these parents are a little “over-appreciative” of their amazing children! To them, everything the child does is a gift, and they want to show the world how blessed they are!

But at any rate, I would take care not to sit near this family again at Mass. It would distract me terribly.

And if they are just weird modern parents who believe in complimenting every little coo and step that their children make–pity their children. When they get older, they will be incorrigible, and all the other kids will dislike them (putting it mildly). And think about their poor schoolteachers–ai yi yi! I

It’s good to praise our children when they are deserving of praise, but too much praise produces a child who requires and demands constant assurance that he/she is absolutely wonderful. Very sad.
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Yeah, I’m moving seats. She had that child when she was a junior in high school, I don’t think she was TTC, I understand people go through troubles, that’s sad. But of course she still feels blessed. I understand that.
 
Z1Z2 said:
I am not the OP, but can’t help but answer. I think I am appropriately interested in my own kids. I usually don’t think other peoples’ kids are all that interesting though. 🤷
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LOL. I like the truthfulness in that. I don’t have any children. I do like kids and babies, but I don’t find lengthy conversations about them particularly interesting. At least not at this time in my life. I certainly don’t want to get into a one sided conversation with someone about everything their child or baby does or about how much their life revolves around them. I noticed some parents do this like they expect others to care and be fascinated.

People posting pictures of their kids on fb every other day annoys me too. I have a cousin who would post multiple pictures of his newborn almost everyday on fb. He did this for weeks until I just decided to block him! LOL. My Grandma use to always tell me “I loved my kids, but I did not adore them like some people do to their children”
 
There’s something very weird and sad about people who demand that everyone else be as impressed with their child as they himself are … and that seems to be at the heart of the situation you’re describing. That’s a highly odd thing to demand–unless you’re convinced that your children really are the be-all and end-all of existence in general, and not just your own.

At worst, that’s a kind of idolatry, an inordinate view of the (as Catholic teaching has it) blessings of children, that in some ways is even more destructive than good, old-fashioned neglect. I don’t envy such people’s children, or the folks who will share a world with them.
 
People are annoying, period. Wah Wah, call a wambulance. Those annoying parents, wanting the world to adore their younguns! They are OUT OF BOUNDS! This world is going to hell in a handbasket, if you ask me. Really. Lord have mercy.
 
Cat said:
That’s really kind of weird.

But perhaps–just a thought–perhaps it took them a long time to have their children. Perhaps the mom experienced several heartbreaking miscarriages–one of my friends had three miscarriages before she was finally able to have her first child (and she had two more beautiful children).

That would explain why these parents are a little “over-appreciative” of their amazing children! To them, everything the child does is a gift, and they want to show the world how blessed they are!

But at any rate, I would take care not to sit near this family again at Mass. It would distract me terribly.

And if they are just weird modern parents who believe in complimenting every little coo and step that their children make–pity their children. When they get older, they will be incorrigible, and all the other kids will dislike them (putting it mildly). And think about their poor schoolteachers–ai yi yi! I

It’s good to praise our children when they are deserving of praise, but too much praise produces a child who requires and demands constant assurance that he/she is absolutely wonderful. Very sad.
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Hey everybody look! Look here at Cat’s post! Isn’t it wonderful? She manages to be generous and charitable to the offending parents by considering a scenario which might explain their odd behavior, and yet she also recognizes that there’s something odd about it and our modern parenting practices that praise children excessively, while also giving some practical advice on avoiding them in the future! Cat, your post-- it’s terrific! Nice work. Everyone should** look at it again.** Re-read it. Come on everyone, let’s all look at Cat’s fantastic post!!! Give her a big hand. :clapping:

Yes, I really think it was a good post by Cat, but in the real world very few grown up people get praises like that from anyone. Raising a child to expect that type of praise will likely result in disappointments at some point.
 
I have 2 kids that I find wildly entertaining but I understand not everyone would. I remember not having kids and pasting on that painful fake smile every time someone said “ooh look what my little one is doing now” or the dreaded phone call when they put the rugrat on the phone with you like it’s the cutest thing in the world to listen to them gurgle. So I’ve tried to never force my kids cuteness on anyone. Especially not during Mass!
 
ExpectedIrony said:
I do have a daughter…I do love her, I do get excited over things, but I don’t expect others to.
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Now isn’t that a terribly sad state of affairs! When I see parents with their young children, my heart aches and those children are, to me, as precious as was my own. Everyone should see your daughter for the beautiful soul she is, but they don’t, and that must sadden the heart of God, as well.
 
ellzeena said:
Now isn’t that a terribly sad state of affairs! When I see parents with their young children, my heart aches and those children are, to me, as precious as was my own. Everyone should see your daughter for the beautiful soul she is, but they don’t, and that must sadden the heart of God, as well.
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There’s a difference between seeing all children as “beautiful souls” and doting on them every minute of the day.

I had fun playing pat-a-cake with a baby yesterday - but after Mass, not during!
 
I understand this issue well, having two daughters with flaming Type A personalities. One should be respectful during Mass, and it is important to keep the children under control to the best of their abilities. When they are young, they may need distractions. In fact, our Church has a pamphlet for young kids that can be used during Mass. Drawing attention to kids, allowing the kids to act up, bringing donuts into Church (different from bringing a bottle for a baby), etc. is inappropriate. If the parents don’t get it, then someone will have to discuss their inappropriate behavior with them so that it doesn’t happen in the future.
 
I’ll be honest and admit it would annoy me also, OP!!! I love kids, but do not believe they should be the center of attention at Mass!!

There are just many people who feel the need to be the center of attention, and not just with their little ones! When DH and I get in the car after a “show” one of us will inevitably say, “Look at me, I’m Sandra Dee!” (remember the song in Grease?).
 
ExpectedIrony said:
I do have a daughter…I do love her, I do get excited over things, but I don’t expect others to.
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Same here. One reason I don’t make daily posts on Facebook about my family. There is a time and place for gushing about your children. More people need to learn the boundaries.
 
Neofight said:
No, I can’t, but then again I will concede that perhaps for others it can’t…keep trying, though!
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Sometimes I pray because of my anger; to take it away. Sometimes, I am angry, justifiably, and pray for the one causing the anger. “Forgive them and help them to learn.”

As for the thread issue, at one church I attend, there is the “passing of kids” back and forth
over the pews. These same kids run around near the alter, no less. The priest kept an eye on one of the kids for a few weeks, then finally paused in the service during another week, and eyed the family.
Forget the distraction or, the ‘kids will be kids’ thing, which will always be. But the priest then became concerned about a kid who could easily trip and do serious damage to his brain from the marble steps.
The family now sits in the back. Waaaay in the back.
 
ellzeena said:
Well, my best guess is you don’t yet have children. Once that baby is in your arms, all the silly adulation of a mother/father starts to make sense to you. Scary, isn’t it LOL!!
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Not all of us get that way. I have kids and I love my kids enough that I’d willingly die for them and wouldn’t think twice about killing to protect them. I praise them when they deserve it and chastise them when they deserve that. I have never been the kind of parent who thinks the silly adoration makes any sense at all. Frankly, its a kid. They’ve been being born and doing cute/amusing stuff since forever. No need to make a big to-do out of it and certainly no need to annoy other people with it.
 
I think I’m sort of the opposite. I don’t like it when complete strangers pay too much attention to my daughter. Last week at mass a woman became totally infatuated with my daughter…she had seen her dancing and singing during the Gloria and clapping along with the lively last hymn. She came up to me before the final hymn finished and wanted to tell me how sweet she was, how cute, how adorable (thanks, but I would like to leave now), oh she loves music!, oh she dances, I can’t believe she is sooooo cute and claps, you should put her in choir, (again thanks, but I’m trying to pick up my stuff), then talking to my girl and touching her cheeks while I gathered a crayon from under the pew.

Luckily this woman was really sweet and I didn’t mind too much…plus I don’t know her situation, maybe she misses her kids, grandkids, maybe she couldn’t conceive…and she seems pretty normal. I have a harder time being charitable when the person interested seems a little “off”, but thats just me being judgmental.

After I got out of there, I spoke with the deacon who did my baptism prep, and when I was distracted my LO started playing in the holy water font, when I excused myself to grab her, sweet lady stepped in and picked up my daughter so she could reach the top of the font and while holding her showed her how to do the sign of the cross. Again, this normally would have drove my crazy but the lady was so sweet.

All in all, if you are going to be that interested in my kid though, I would appreciate it if you at least introduced yourself! I never got her name…but she sure got my kids name and age! Hey, if she loves my kids that much…I’m still searching for a good godparent…she might have been perfect, if she had at least introduced herself to me!
 
Agreed. Honestly I don’t like babies/children very much unless they are family (in which case I’m crazy about them). But other people’s kids? Eh, I’d much rather play with a puppy or a kitten or something. They’re much cuter too.

And yeah, I do see it all the time… people bringing their kids to certain events/places just to show them off and get attention. I’m never one of those people who sees a baby/kid and immediately goes “Oh my Goooosh, she’s so cuuute, how old is she??” I have absolutely 0 desire to interact with other people’s kids. :o
 
Debora123 said:
Agreed. Honestly I don’t like babies/children very much unless they are family (in which case I’m crazy about them). But other people’s kids? Eh, I’d much rather play with a puppy or a kitten or something. They’re much cuter too.

And yeah, I do see it all the time… people bringing their kids to certain events/places just to show them off and get attention. I’m never one of those people who sees a baby/kid and immediately goes “Oh my Goooosh, she’s so cuuute, how old is she??” I have absolutely 0 desire to interact with other people’s kids. :o
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My feelings EXACTLY.
 
cheezey said:
Sometimes I pray because of my anger; to take it away. Sometimes, I am angry, justifiably, and pray for the one causing the anger. “Forgive them and help them to learn.”

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That was my point, prayer will remove the anger, but praying for others to learn seems
like the prayer of the Pharisee saying he is thankful he’s not like those other sinners.
 
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