I don't know how to fox myself

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ineedofmercy

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I planned on posting this earlier but couldn’t

I Just broke silently begging God to help me with all the problems I’m about to mention and could really use helps because I’m in the struggle of my life

-I’m struggling with the mortal sin or porn and masturbation addiction and can’t seem to do well against it right now
-I’m afraid of embarrassment to ask to go confession or refuse the host (despite this could be my cross its hard to even force myself to do it)
-I don’t have much hope for the future and for fun things that are happening soon I lose hope that they will be
  • I can’t seem to forgive myself sometimes because I got myself here and I offend God and while I know he loves me as I am and more when I’m better is hard to believe when I hurt his feelings so much
  • I look in the mirror and can’t see how God could love me or make me in his image when I’m disgusting and I’m sure many people wouldn’t like me if I came out for what I did despite them probably doing the same thing
I hate living like this and don’t see why it can’t be easier for me or why I am tempted by the devil so much because I see no pontential for me to be a super good person

I’m really hurting right now and I had more to say before but forgot it

No one seems to understand but I can’t blame them because I’ve sought help online because I fear people’s judgement in person

Please help and I don’t know what to do
Even when I try to bring up confession no one cares
 
You are torturing yourself and the best course of action is to start with offering yourself forgiveness. Seek out a Catholic counselor to help you and don’t worry about judgements because nobody needs to know you are going and no one needs to know why. You need to take more direct steps before this causes you more pain.

God Bless
 
Please make an appointment with your parish priest and tell him exactly how you feel…don’t hold anything back. Tell him you need to make a confession, you need advice and spiritual counselling. Listen to what he tells you and follow his instruction.

God Bless
 
God is not small minded, he loves you and asks nothing in return.

Our love for God is a natural response to his love for us.

The devil often tries to make us feel like sinners and worthless.

But the devil is a LIAR. He lies.

Trust in love, your love for God and desire to be a good son and God’s love for you and his love as the perfect father.

Think about the unconditional love that your parents have for you. Even if you were a murderer, they would still LOVE you.

The devil doesn’t know LOVE, he has lost it and he wants nothing more than to share his misery with us.

You are winning the war, just keep on keeping on.

Forgive yourself and when you fall (which you will and God knows) forgive yourself again.

Think of your current suffering as the perfect training in getting up after falling down.

In the stations of the cross, Jesus falls three times and he gets up three times.

It’s not the falling that matters, its the courage it takes to keep going and dust your self off.

The devil is all about pride and lies, he will convince you that you are worthless and whisper for you to stay down.

But just laugh in his face and reach out to Jesus and keep going.

Nothing pleases our heavenly father more than to see us beat the devil and we do each and every time we keep going despite our falls.

Love yourself
Forgive yourself,

God does.
 
I don’t know how to turn myself into a fox either o.O

Sorry, couldn’t resist 🙂 a little levity is always good 🙂
 
You are not alone. Jesus always cares. Allow yourself to feel his Mother’s embrace. Allow yourself to be forgiven and forgive yourself. You do not need to fix yourself. He will do that. You just need to let him. He loves you enough to do so. I’ll pray you find peace.
 
Are you not of age and dependent on parents for transportation to confession? Is that what you mean when you say you are afraid to ask to go?

If that is the case, make an Act of Contrition when you realize you have sinned, and go to confession when you do have the opportunity. Talk to your priest about your situation and explain that you are striving to overcome the sinful habit but that there are the obstacles about asking, and the embarrassment, that are complicating the process. Your sin is forgiven as soon as you are sorry and confess it to God. Absolution is ordinarily necessary, but your priest may be able to help you with being able to go to Communion (Catechism of the Catholic Church 1457).

Try to not be put off too much by the embarrassment though. You might be able to say something like you just want to go to confession more often because it helps you. Do you have more than one possible person who could provide transportation and who will not be nosy and ask a bunch of questions? It’s always embarrassing to admit we sin, and some sins are more embarrassing than others. The devil likes that because he can use it against us to keep us from the Sacraments. Start to fight back - it won’t be easy at first but pray and you will gain strength and courage. God bless you!
 
ineedofmercy said:
I planned on posting this earlier but couldn’t

I Just broke silently begging God to help me with all the problems I’m about to mention and could really use helps because I’m in the struggle of my life

-I’m struggling with the mortal sin or porn and masturbation addiction and can’t seem to do well against it right now
-I’m afraid of embarrassment to ask to go confession or refuse the host (despite this could be my cross its hard to even force myself to do it)
-I don’t have much hope for the future and for fun things that are happening soon I lose hope that they will be
  • I can’t seem to forgive myself sometimes because I got myself here and I offend God and while I know he loves me as I am and more when I’m better is hard to believe when I hurt his feelings so much
  • I look in the mirror and can’t see how God could love me or make me in his image when I’m disgusting and I’m sure many people wouldn’t like me if I came out for what I did despite them probably doing the same thing
I hate living like this and don’t see why it can’t be easier for me or why I am tempted by the devil so much because I see no pontential for me to be a super good person

I’m really hurting right now and I had more to say before but forgot it

No one seems to understand but I can’t blame them because I’ve sought help online because I fear people’s judgement in person

Please help and I don’t know what to do
Even when I try to bring up confession no one cares
Click to expand...
After a lifetime of slavery to this sin i too felt disgusting and such. I hated these sins but was powerless in the face of it. But the Lord granted me two years of freedom from this sin through a good confession. I let it back into my life and have been struggling with it for the last 5 yrs or so. I went through all kinds of thoughts God doesn’t want me, i don’t love God enough, etc. This last time i was unable to receive for almost three months being unable to confess due to time constraints of both me and priest. Being unable to receive was becoming harder and harder i started to hate not receiving more than any thing.
My advice stop receiving until you have went to confession.
 
You are not alone, God is always with you. Do not be afraid to go to Confession. You will not be telling the Priest anything he has not heard before. Remember, God in His infinite mercy will always forgive our sins & welcome us back into the embrace of His loving arms. I’ll be praying for your intentions. God bless.
 
ineedofmercy said:
Please help and I don’t know what to do
Click to expand...
A lot of folks have given you wonderful advice, here and elsewhere.

Have you simply sat your parents down and told them you need to go to confession? I’m unclear if you’ve actually done this yet, but it seems as if you still don’t want to bring this up. You need to do so immediately, because you’re letting this drag on and on, and it’s apparently getting worse and worse.

Please. Tell. Your. Parents.
 
LaetenturCaeli said:
A lot of folks have given you wonderful advice, here and elsewhere.

Have you simply sat your parents down and told them you need to go to confession? I’m unclear if you’ve actually done this yet, but it seems as if you still don’t want to bring this up. You need to do so immediately, because you’re letting this drag on and on, and it’s apparently getting worse and worse.

Please. Tell. Your. Parents.
Click to expand...
My brother and I both Agree (he doesn’t know about my problem) that when we ask or tell them anything like this they get weird and ask questions that are very annoying and we both hate it it’s very depressing so we both established a huge fear of it

I haven’t sat them down because I can’t seem to force myself because I’m a wimp to it

I’ve brought confession up but doesn’t seem to doing it

I’m on a losing streak but I think i will get back on track just having some bad days I think
I’m trying to pray for Gods help but I can’t seem to get out of his way because I fear the pain I will endure and the effect it will have on my relationship with my parents

I can never find the right time or moment
I can never get them in the right mood or when the arent tired
I might just wait till I can do it myself or tell my brother the truth and deal with that pain first

They get overly curious I’ve asked them when we were going before and the got all cocky and said stuff like
“Why do you have something to confess?” In a smug voice
“Why what did you do”
“Did you do something bad”
I would tell them if I trusted them
I just want their permission
They barely go once a year they help out a church and usually don’t miss mass but they neglect confession probably because they see it as a waste of time and pointless

I’m the only one in my family this serious about faith so they will just make me feel like a weirdo and I don’t know what I’d do if I had to do to that

I understand I’m ima grave area and should fear God more than them but I almost can’t do it

I hate living like this it’s makes me not want to wake up and it makes everything bleek
I feel trapped by them why are they like that they are way to concerned about my private business but never care about what I want
They can be really be a real problem in my life sometimes I love them but they have no idea how cruel they can be or how it effects me
 
I haven’t read all the other posts, but I’d like to suggest that you remind yourself that you are in control of your temptations. Recognize that temptations are just that, and try to choose some other thought or action instead of turning to sin.

Always have a proper book to read, use the sleep button on your clock radio and fall asleep listening to some Catholic radio station, whatever the broadcast is, or put on a soft music CD, etc. If you fall into sin, KNOW that God is waiting to forgive.
 
ineedofmercy said:
I planned on posting this earlier but couldn’t

I Just broke silently begging God to help me with all the problems I’m about to mention and could really use helps because I’m in the struggle of my life

-I’m struggling with the mortal sin or porn and masturbation addiction and can’t seem to do well against it right now
-I’m afraid of embarrassment to ask to go confession or refuse the host (despite this could be my cross its hard to even force myself to do it)
-I don’t have much hope for the future and for fun things that are happening soon I lose hope that they will be
  • I can’t seem to forgive myself sometimes because I got myself here and I offend God and while I know he loves me as I am and more when I’m better is hard to believe when I hurt his feelings so much
  • I look in the mirror and can’t see how God could love me or make me in his image when I’m disgusting and I’m sure many people wouldn’t like me if I came out for what I did despite them probably doing the same thing
I hate living like this and don’t see why it can’t be easier for me or why I am tempted by the devil so much because I see no pontential for me to be a super good person

I’m really hurting right now and I had more to say before but forgot it

No one seems to understand but I can’t blame them because I’ve sought help online because I fear people’s judgement in person

Please help and I don’t know what to do
Even when I try to bring up confession no one cares
Click to expand...
For porn and masturbation, what is your age? I am not saying it is right but your age may be why it is difficult for you to stop. You may be at your sexual peak. Do not be embarrassed. Priests have heard it all. They visit prison if they makes you feel better. Why are you afraid to refuse the host? Are you afraid of judgmental eyes? Your relationship is between you and God. Dude, if you do not have hope, you have nothing. Pray. Have faith. Nothing lasts forever, everything changes. You will conquer this vice. We are all tempted in different ways. Some ways are more obvious than others. Nonetheless we all face temptations. Why isn’t so easy for you to give into this temptation? I do not know. I do not know your psyche. Please do not go down this route with your negative attitude. If you want to know my sin, I will share it. I talk about almost every person badly behind their back. This is my worst habit. I have tried to conquer it, but it prevails. I feel like such a horrible person because I am gossip, backbiter, detractor. I cannot go back and undo anything I have ever said or spread. I have to live with it. Count yourself lucky that you can keep your sin a secret. NOT SAYING IT IS GOOD TO HIDE SINS. You do not wear you sin on your sleeve. Your sin is between you and God.
 
Proverbs 24:16 a righteous man falls seven times and rises again
 
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