I don't like Mass

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Meggie18

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My name is Meggie. I converted to the Catholic faith when I was about sixteen, but it took me quite a lot of time to understand how crucial it was to be attending Mass on Sundays. I’m almost nineteen now, and it’s still a big challenge for me to go to church. It’s not because I’m lazy; I don’t have a problem getting out of bed. I guess it’s because I almost always go to Mass alone. My parents do not practice any religion (I think my dad doesn’t even believe in God!), and I am an only child. My extended family doesn’t practice, either. I don’t have close friends that believe in God. Sometimes, a lady I know comes with me, and I’m grateful for that, but that doesn’t happen often. She’s very busy.

I feel bad for saying this, but I also think I have a problem attending Mass because it can be, well, boring. (I’m sorry, God! I feel terrible for writing this!) I live in a country (or rather, a province) where few people care about God. It’s almost only elder people that go to Mass now. I don’t have anything against them, but I would just feel so much better if there were more teenagers or young adults attending Mass. I would feel more comfortable, more at home, I guess, and I could make friends.

Plus, we always say the same things at Mass, I feel like it’s repeating over and over, and the music is so not joyful… when I compare our music with the one that the gospels choirs sing, I can’t help but be disappointed.

I know I probably sound a bit immature… believe me, I’m not, I love Jesus, and I keep going to church because I know that the host is keeping me alive.

Do you have any kind of advice to give me so that I can learn to enjoy Mass?
 
Hi,

I’m also a young adult, I go to Mass alone, I’m an only child and my family isn’t Catholic. I don’t really socialize with anyone before or after Mass. I was glad to find a parish where I love the music - I don’t know what you are drawn to, but I love traditional choirs, the organ, etc. But what’s helped me is just praying to Jesus in the Eucharist the whole time… just spending that time with Him, as with our Friend. Making it more personal.

God bless 🙂
 
I’m 21, when I was younger I also felt Mass was boring. I have a book that you may find helpful called Rediscovering Catholicism by Matthew Kelly(I believe).

I believe it was Blessed Mother Teresa who said that she goes to Adoration to see the One who sees her. Remember that when we go to Mass that we see a Great Miracle where bread and wine become the Body and Blood of Jesus Christ. The music may be awful. The people may not be pleasant. The priest may not give a good homily. But through God’s grace we enter Calvary and we partake in the Sacrament that heals us most of all. We Adore Christ our Savior!

Are you able to watch EWTN? Father Corapi, Life on the Rock, EWTN Live are wonderful programs for training as a Catholic. Also, Facebook can be an excellent tool to find others your age involved in the faith.

I’ll be praying for you. Pax Christi!
 
Why not explore other forms of Liturgy? Try the Extraordinary Form or seek a Byzantine Catholic Divine Liturgy. The beautify of a truly Catholic faith is the diversity in tradition and another tradition may suit you better.
 
Meggie18 said:
but I would just feel so much better if there were more teenagers or young adults attending Mass. I would feel more comfortable, more at home, I guess, and I could make friends.
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Well, then, invite some to go with you to Mass.
Meggie18 said:
Plus, we always say the same things at Mass, I feel like it’s repeating over and over, and the music is so not joyful… when I compare our music with the one that the gospels choirs sing, I can’t help but be disappointed.
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I suggest you get a copy of Do I Have to Go? 101 Questions About the Mass, the Eucharist, and Your Spiritual Life by Matthew Pinto, Chris Stefanick.
Meggie18 said:
Do you have any kind of advice to give me so that I can learn to enjoy Mass?
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Well, whenever you think “I don’t want to go to Mass because I *don’t like *Mass” you just think about Jesus, who probably *didn’t like *getting nailed to the cross to save you from your sins. He did it anyway.

He endured a brutal death for our salvation, and we all owe God our worship and we also need to keep his command to participate in the Sacraments-- to eat his flesh and drink his blood in the Eucharist.
 
I was a youth leader for a protestant church for about two years. Each Sunday at worship, I would have the kids in my group scout out the congregation for unfamiliar kids. If they spotted one, they’d go over and introduce themselves and even invite the new/returning person to come enjoy worship with us.

Your post reminded me of this. If this was me, granted I’m just returning to the Catholic faith so I hope this is ok (i’d risk it), I’d go scan the pews a few minutes before Mass to find anybody near my age (18-30), and go introduce myself… or at least go sit by them so I can be face to face at greeting time. Then if they’re friendly, I’d make it a point on Sundays to sit near them and engage. Perhaps the opportunity for a relationship will open up.

If not, just go to Mass and never sit in the same place twice. Eventually moving around you’ll come in contact with somebody.

I’m not saying make this a game, but perhaps viewing the alter from different pews might yield different perspectives.

Also, don’t discount those old folks. They have children and grandchildren. Volunteering at one of their functions might open doors for you. Kind old souls have probably felt the same as you.

Finally, tell the priest that you’re having these issues. He’s the Shepherd of this parish flock. Maybe he knows of some activity or group that you’re not aware of.

This is your golden opportunity to really become part of the parish community. 👍
 
Yes, it makes a world of difference if you are welcomed warmly into a parish. It happened the first time I stepped into a UGCC parish. I’ve been attending there ever since.
 
Finding some people to introduce myself to - and it can take a few tries - has worked well for me the times I’ve been new to a parish.

Some of the people you get to know at first you may drift apart from over time or they from you, but don’t let that worry you either. It’s kind of a natural part of the process, has been my experience. Some are kind of transitional people that God leads us to in the beginning until we’ve met a few others and begun to feel more at home.

If there is any group or service that you feel called to join in on, that can also lead to familiarity and friendships. Even if the bonds aren’t as deep as we’d ideally like, it does at least help to see familiar faces and exchange greetings.

I’m another only child, btw! And a cradle Catholic one at that.
 
Meggie18 said:
Plus, we always say the same things at Mass, I feel like it’s repeating over and over.

Do you have any kind of advice to give me so that I can learn to enjoy Mass?
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Sorry, I don’t have any advice about the music…

We, the laity, do say the same things at Mass every week, but I feel that that is to our advantage. The saying goes “familiarity breeds contempt”, but I like to think of it as a chance to go deeper every week into the prayers that I get to say (and the laity’s part are prayers, not just “things”).
 
Dr Scott Hahn has written a book called ‘The Lamb’s Supper’ about the meaning and significance of the Mass. If you can get a hold of a copy, try reading it.
 
Meggie18 said:
My name is Meggie. I converted to the Catholic faith when I was about sixteen, but it took me quite a lot of time to understand how crucial it was to be attending Mass on Sundays. I’m almost nineteen now, and it’s still a big challenge for me to go to church. It’s not because I’m lazy; I don’t have a problem getting out of bed. I guess it’s because I almost always go to Mass alone. My parents do not practice any religion (I think my dad doesn’t even believe in God!), and I am an only child. My extended family doesn’t practice, either. I don’t have close friends that believe in God. Sometimes, a lady I know comes with me, and I’m grateful for that, but that doesn’t happen often. She’s very busy.

I feel bad for saying this, but I also think I have a problem attending Mass because it can be, well, boring. (I’m sorry, God! I feel terrible for writing this!) I live in a country (or rather, a province) where few people care about God. It’s almost only elder people that go to Mass now. I don’t have anything against them, but I would just feel so much better if there were more teenagers or young adults attending Mass. I would feel more comfortable, more at home, I guess, and I could make friends.

Plus, we always say the same things at Mass, I feel like it’s repeating over and over, and the music is so not joyful… when I compare our music with the one that the gospels choirs sing, I can’t help but be disappointed.

I know I probably sound a bit immature… believe me, I’m not, I love Jesus, and I keep going to church because I know that the host is keeping me alive.

Do you have any kind of advice to give me so that I can learn to enjoy Mass?
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How about you try a different time? I’m not sure where you are, but Sunday evening is often the time when you have a more “teens Mass” (lots of teens go, and the music is usually more modern).
 
I enjoyed reading the responses. Very good ones! I thought of something else. Could you walk to Mass?

Another thought. Read the readings beforehand?

Lastly. Find some one thing to do the following week, that came from inspiration from the Mass. From the reading, or homily, the Holy Spirit, Our Lady, something that you can bring into your life and into your family. It could be, for example, some special service to your mom or dad, or, to a neighbor. Nursing home, prisoners, a sick person, a hobby that can help another … Some small thing or a way to serve. Sunday Mass ends with sending us out into the world. One can’t really add to the reception of Holy Communion, as you well said, but, find a way to bring yourself out into community. Jesus changes you. I truly believe that as He promised, you will find friends, nearby, like yourself!
 
LilyM said:
Dr Scott Hahn has written a book called ‘The Lamb’s Supper’ about the meaning and significance of the Mass. If you can get a hold of a copy, try reading it.
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Hi Meggie. I was in your shoes for sixteen years!

I would recommend reading the book which Lily mentioned. It examines the similarities between the Book of Revelation and the Mass, and the fact that the book of revelation is for the most part, about the Mass and not understandable outside of the context of the Mass. See amazon.com/Lambs-Supper-Mass-Heaven-Earth/dp/0385496591

Having a good missal also helps. A good missal will have comments on the readings, explaining them a bit before you hear them read aloud. It also gives you an opportunity to read the readings a day or two before the Mass and to study or meditate on them a little if that is what you like to do. The prayers are all laid out, including the beautiful Eucharistic prayers and so you can read them in advance or follow along. One thing a good missal will do is tune you in to the Church’s calendar, the various feast days and seasons like advent, lent, the octave of Easter, etc. The Church calendar is very interesting.

Ask the priest if there is a way you can get involved. You could be a sacristine (spelling), helping to set up before the Mass and putting things away after. If they allow femal altar servers, you could train for that as well.

Also, do you study scripture? Do you know the parts of the Bible which speak about the Mass?

The fact that you are asking tells me that God has put a spirit in you, that he wants you to enjoy the Mass but that he wants you to work to find out. Man, that was fun for me, to learn about the parts of the Mass and then go and enjoy it on the following Sunday!

-Tim-
 
Meggie18 said:
My name is Meggie. I converted to the Catholic faith when I was about sixteen, but it took me quite a lot of time to understand how crucial it was to be attending Mass on Sundays. I’m almost nineteen now, and it’s still a big challenge for me to go to church. It’s not because I’m lazy; I don’t have a problem getting out of bed. I guess it’s because I almost always go to Mass alone. My parents do not practice any religion (I think my dad doesn’t even believe in God!), and I am an only child. My extended family doesn’t practice, either. I don’t have close friends that believe in God. Sometimes, a lady I know comes with me, and I’m grateful for that, but that doesn’t happen often. She’s very busy.

I more comfortable, more at home, I guess, and I could make friends.

Plus, we always say the same things at Mass, I feel like it’s repeating over and over, and the music is so not joyful… when I compare our music with the one that the gospels choirs sing, I can’t help but be disappointed.

Do you have any kind of advice to give me so that I can learn to enjoy Mass?
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My first advise is ask the help of our heavenly mother, the Blessed Virgin.

Then, see if your parish has a youth group, and if none, find a nearby parish with one of your age. In our parish, there is an active youth group, where a Sunday mass is oriented towards the youth, they usher, do the readings, sing, and some who qualified, are eucharistic ministers. It heartens my heart when I see them do this.
 
Im in a similar situation, Im a young adult and unfortunately live in the worst possible place for attending mass location wise, even more so since im still learning to drive (i left it a bit late) and I doubt my irreligious immediate relatives would drive me to mass.

So i basically grab every opportunity to attend when i can. As for your particular problem I agree that focussing on the sacrifice made present in the eucharist and the actual presence of God in a substantial way in the eucharist may help you. If you just think of it as mere bread and wine with the reality being at the back of your mind than ofc its going to be boring because it becomes nigh meaningless and seems to be an empty set of rituals which is absolutely not the case.

Secondly i like to reflect after those times i can go to mass about the gravity of what i have recieved, the great gift that has been given, and to pray that Christ purifies me of my great sin and leads me to a conversion of the heart that i may walk in the path of christ and live according to the standards of the saints. (long way to go yet:rolleyes:) Perhaps you should do the same, God is present within you in a profound way after you recieve the eucharist, ask him to help you and open your heart and mind to wisdom.

We are all called to holiness make every action a conscious testament to that goal, catholic christianity is not just go to mass, go to confession, go to nightbar and ignore the faith every other day, you must be totally involved in the faith for its meaning and depth to penetrate into you and lead you into an understanding of the true beauty of the Holy Catholic Church.

good luck on your journey of faith:thumbsup:
 
Meggie18 said:
My name is Meggie. I converted to the Catholic faith when I was about sixteen, but it took me quite a lot of time to understand how crucial it was to be attending Mass on Sundays. I’m almost nineteen now, and it’s still a big challenge for me to go to church. It’s not because I’m lazy; I don’t have a problem getting out of bed. I guess it’s because I almost always go to Mass alone. My parents do not practice any religion (I think my dad doesn’t even believe in God!), and I am an only child. My extended family doesn’t practice, either. I don’t have close friends that believe in God. Sometimes, a lady I know comes with me, and I’m grateful for that, but that doesn’t happen often. She’s very busy.

I feel bad for saying this, but I also think I have a problem attending Mass because it can be, well, boring. (I’m sorry, God! I feel terrible for writing this!) I live in a country (or rather, a province) where few people care about God. It’s almost only elder people that go to Mass now. I don’t have anything against them, but I would just feel so much better if there were more teenagers or young adults attending Mass. I would feel more comfortable, more at home, I guess, and I could make friends.

Plus, we always say the same things at Mass, I feel like it’s repeating over and over, and the music is so not joyful… when I compare our music with the one that the gospels choirs sing, I can’t help but be disappointed.

I know I probably sound a bit immature… believe me, I’m not, I love Jesus, and I keep going to church because I know that the host is keeping me alive.

Do you have any kind of advice to give me so that I can learn to enjoy Mass?
Click to expand...
Maybe find a different place to worship?
 
I’m the same age as you as probably really started becoming a Catholic at around the same age so I get what you mean about sometimes feeling like everyone there is very elderly. I went to mass when I was staying at my grandparents and the only other teenager there was the daughter of the headmaster of the catholic school connected with the church. It can feel very daunting.

The thing I found really helpful was when I was studying in RCIA (even though I was baptised and took communion, I was too old for the regular confirmation classes) was the the priest gave us all copies of the mass text and went through it all with us, explaining the meaning and significance of everything. It really helped me understand what mass was about and stopped it from seeming like boring ritual. See if you can get the priest at your church to do something similar with you.

Or look for a different parish, if there is one available. If not, maybe ask a friend to go with you? Even if they are not a Catholic, it could be a good opportunity to introduce them to the faith.

I hope you find a way to make mass more enjoyable for you.
 
Vince1022 said:
Maybe find a different place to worship?
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I agree. I don’t think I would have stayed at the Eastern Catholic parish I am in now if we still had our previous pastor in our RC parish. The new one just doesn’t fulfill my spiritual needs. The previous one makes me excited to come to Mass and hear his wonderful homilies.

Maybe a different Mass time if there is a different priest, or another parish.
 
Apparently Judas didn’t agree with the homily and he found another place…

I believe that proper catechesis on the Mass is really lacking since every Mass is an invitation to participate in Jesus’ passion. Bad this and bad that does not undermine the effectiveness of the Mass nor its beauty. We are not there to be entertained but to become one with Christ in the Eucharist.

The Last Supper was the only Mass at the time. You either took what Jesus offered or you left…
 
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