St. Paul’s advice to unmarried Christians to remain as he is admits that the married face difficulties not faced by those who remain celibate. That does not mean he does not value marriage, as Ephesians 5 makes clear.
The priest’s one-dimensional advice was so oversimplified as to be false. Yes, spouses need to be available to each other, considering their bodies to belong to their spouse. No, this doesn’t mean that a good spouse will demand sex without regard to whether their partner is favorably inclined towards it at the moment. That is a big topic, not a one-liner topic.
Since you are not driven to marry even if it means making compromises with regards to the Christian quality of the marriage, you have the advantage that you can hold out for the case where you are “captured” by a particularly good man for a particularly good marriage or else you won’t marry at all. This is a good state to be in.
Your view of marriage concerns me, though. Let us take it step-by-step:
Rarely anyone finds a good partner that follows the faith,
Not as often as we should, because it would seem we do live in a slothful and self-permissive age where self-mastery is undervalued. It does happen, though. If you have the continence to hold out for a good Catholic husband or else do not marry at all, happy will you be. Your main concern ought to be whether you have the fidelity and self-forgetfulness to be a good spouse yourself and whether you are learning self-mastery and an orientation that concerns yourself more with others than with yourself. Those who have that maturity will have a far higher likelihood of attracting and keeping a partner who is just as mature, pious, faithful, and generally virtuous. Hang around with people like that, and your chances of finding one who wants to marry you will be higher. If you discern you are called to religious life, you will also have prepared yourself for that.
married life is full of problems,
Religious life is no bowl of cherries, either, because we humans have our frailties. As Ecclesiastes put it, though: Where a lone man may be overcome, two together can resist. A three-ply cord is not easily broken. Eccl. 4:12 There is a reason that religious communities do not allow anyone to become a hermit until they have mastered the communal life. It is because the communal life lays our selfishness and self-centeredness bare. Marriage and family life have this quality, too. Besides, marriage gives humans a way to express their God-given sexual urges in a chaste and life-giving way.
all men are only interested in sex,
First, it isn’t true, second, a strong libido is not inherently incompatible with the Christian life, and third, I have news for you, but women typically have libidos, too. It is not abnormal to have a low sex drive, but it isn’t repugnant to have a typical sex drive, either. Sexual desire between a husband and wife is not a vice, but a natural urge towards procreation and the total marital unity that makes parents the foundation of the family. This total unity includes a divinely-designed physical unity, which through the Sacrament of Marriage becomes a unity in imitation of Christ and His Bride, the Church, which is a unity par excellence.
I think why should I bring children into the world to suffer and I think there are too many people in the world anyway
This sounds a little too much like Ebeneezer Scrooge, who got his comeuppance from the Ghost of Christmas Present:
*“Spirit,” said Scrooge, with an interest he had never felt before,“tell me if Tiny Tim will live.”
“I see a vacant seat,” replied the Ghost, “in the poor chimney-corner, and a crutch without an owner, carefully preserved. If these shadows remain unaltered by the Future, the child will die.”
“No, no,” said Scrooge. “Oh, no, kind Spirit. Say he will be spared.”
“If these shadows remain unaltered by the Future, none other of my race,” returned the Ghost, “will find him here. What then? If he be like to die, he had better do it, and decrease the surplus population.”
Scrooge hung his head to hear his own words quoted by the Spirit, and was overcome with penitence and grief.
“Man,” said the Ghost, “if man you be in heart, not adamant, forbear that wicked cant until you have discovered What the surplus is, and Where it is. Will you decide what men shall live, what men shall die? It may be, that in the sight of Heaven, you are more worthless and less fit to live than millions like this poor man’s child. Oh God! To hear the Insect on the leaf pronouncing on the too much life among his hungry brothers in the dust.”*
If you do not believe that our suffering here is short compared to the eternal bliss that God intends us to have with Him in Heaven, how can you give yourself to religious life? How can you do penances, how can you deny your short-sighted impulses? How can you claim to have a Christian life radically aimed at communion with the infinite love and compassion of God?
and lastly can you really love someone for a lifetime and not get sick of them?
If you can’t love someone for the short span of our life here on Earth, how will you cut it in Heaven? Who is going to want to live with you for eternity or how will you find bliss in eternal life with others, if you can’t imagine loving even one person, a person devoted to your happiness, for a mere 50 or 60 years?
