I don't think I can do this

[TSB4]

I will be ending this pregnancy. I feel like I don’t have any other option at this point. I know for a fact that if i carry to term, I will be solely responsible for 5 children. My husband will not sign adoption papers. He will not help. I have to get a grip on reality here, and right now i have allot of things to do in my home with my current children. Bringing another baby into this current mess, is not fair to anyone. I have to battle my anxiety and get it under control, along with my children. I should have just gone ahead with having my tubes tied, but, after praying on it, I was lead to believe that it was totally the wrong thing to do. I have to go ahead with my plan, and jus hope for the best. Thank you all.

 

[Xantippe]

TSB4:

“I will be ending this pregnancy. I feel like I don’t have any other option at this point.”

You will most likely regret this to your dying day. Don’t do it. I had a miscarriage where the baby had died at 13 weeks–the baby was quite recognizable, small, with a big head and little legs and arms. I had nothing to do with that baby dying, but it took nearly a year and a half to feel like a normal, functional human being after my baby died. I was so sad, and that was with no guilt at all, and not having planned to have that baby.

“I know for a fact that if i carry to term, I will be solely responsible for 5 children. My husband will not sign adoption papers. He will not help.”

He can’t stop you from getting your baby into foster care until you feel better. All you have to do is pick up the phone and talk to a social worker.

“I have to get a grip on reality here, and right now i have allot of things to do in my home with my current children.”

Your current children includes your baby.

Also, bear in mind that your husband will know about the abortion. He may, some time down the road, tell your other kids about it, particularly if you get a divorce. Can you deal with that?

 

[TSB4]

TSB4:

“I will be ending this pregnancy. I feel like I don’t have any other option at this point.”

You will most likely regret this to your dying day. Don’t do it. I had a miscarriage where the baby had died at 13 weeks–the baby was quite recognizable, small, with a big head and little legs and arms. I had nothing to do with that baby dying, but it took nearly a year and a half to feel like a normal, functional human being after my baby died. I was so sad, and that was with no guilt at all, and not having planned to have that baby.

“I know for a fact that if i carry to term, I will be solely responsible for 5 children. My husband will not sign adoption papers. He will not help.”

He can’t stop you from getting your baby into foster care until you feel better. All you have to do is pick up the phone and talk to a social worker.

“I have to get a grip on reality here, and right now i have allot of things to do in my home with my current children.”

Your current children includes your baby.

Also, bear in mind that your husband will know about the abortion. He may, some time down the road, tell your other kids about it, particularly if you get a divorce. Can you deal with that?

I can deal with my kids finding out about it down the road more than I can deal with the added stress of another baby. I am only one person. It take two to make a baby for a reason.

 

[Xantippe]

Have you thought about appropriate burial arrangements? They will throw your baby in the garbage at an abortion clinic unless you speak up.

When I had the induction for my miscarriage, I spoke to every nurse I saw to make sure that my baby wouldn’t accidentally get discarded–it was really the thing I was most worried about. My husband made arrangements with a local funeral home (they donate their services when children die) and we were able to bury our baby in the children’s area of a local cemetery. Our pastor came and read some prayers. We bought a marker with a name and date along with the text from Revelations 21:4:

" He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning nor crying nor pain any more, for the former things have passed away.”

 

[HandyAndy]

You say you love your children. That does not sound like someone so cold as to take the life of an unborn child. It always strikes me with disbelief how God gave such a privilege…such a gift to women, only to watch many of them abuse such a divine gift. The responsibility for new life. The gift of creation itself. A women to carry, protect and nurture that which cannot do for itself. Abortion is a betrayal of such a gift. You were involved at the beginning of this child’s journey…how ironic, if you are at the end of it.
You have alternatives. Pick up the phone and reach out for help in your local area.
I really get so sick of the slogan “my body my choice”. Absolute BS. Women have been given the gift of bringing new life into this world. Men should worship the ground on which you walk. The gift of creation…I can think of no greater gift then to be the giver of life itself.

Make no mistake about it…you believe things couldn’t possibly get any worse…they most surely can. You and your baby are connected. It is a bond that can never be broken. NEVER. You will always be bound to this child…even if you are responsible for its death. This child already exists and is alive in your womb. Your womb is its home. It’s refuge. A safe place to grow in a mothers love.

I have not heard you mention at any time, reaching outside of your situation for help. Pick up the phone and call a lifeline charity for help.

 

[TSB4]

You say you love your children. That does not sound like someone so cold as to take the life of an unborn child. It always strikes me with disbelief how God gave such a privilege…such a gift to women, only to watch many of them abuse such a divine gift. The responsibility for new life. The gift of creation itself. A women to carry, protect and nurture that which cannot do for itself. Abortion is a betrayal of such a gift. You were involved at the beginning of this child’s journey…how ironic, if you are at the end of it.
You have alternatives. Pick up the phone and reach out for help in your local area.
I really get so sick of the slogan “my body my choice”. Absolute BS. Women have been given the gift of bringing new life into this world. Men should worship the ground on which you walk. The gift of creation…I can think of no greater gift then to be the giver of life itself.

Make no mistake about it…you believe things couldn’t possibly get any worse…they most surely can. You and your baby are connected. It is a bond that can never be broken. NEVER. You will always be bound to this child…even if you are responsible for its death. This child already exists and is alive in your womb. Your womb is its home. It’s refuge. A safe place to grow in a mothers love.

I have not heard you mention at any time, reaching outside of your situation for help. Pick up the phone and call a lifeline charity for help.

thank you

 

[LittleRose]

I will be ending this pregnancy. I feel like I don’t have any other option at this point. I know for a fact that if i carry to term, I will be solely responsible for 5 children. My husband will not sign adoption papers. He will not help. I have to get a grip on reality here, and right now i have allot of things to do in my home with my current children. Bringing another baby into this current mess, is not fair to anyone. I have to battle my anxiety and get it under control, along with my children. I should have just gone ahead with having my tubes tied, but, after praying on it, I was lead to believe that it was totally the wrong thing to do. I have to go ahead with my plan, and jus hope for the best. Thank you all.

I am so sorry things have reached this point. It sounds like your situation is getting more difficult. A week ago, you we’re saying you couldn’t bring yourself to have an abortion. What has changed? I’m really concerned for you.

 

[Listener]

I will be ending this pregnancy. I feel like I don’t have any other option at this point. I know for a fact that if i carry to term, I will be solely responsible for 5 children. My husband will not sign adoption papers. He will not help. I have to get a grip on reality here, and right now i have allot of things to do in my home with my current children. Bringing another baby into this current mess, is not fair to anyone. I have to battle my anxiety and get it under control, along with my children. I should have just gone ahead with having my tubes tied, but, after praying on it, I was lead to believe that it was totally the wrong thing to do. I have to go ahead with my plan, and jus hope for the best. Thank you all.

Kill your own child? What a creepy thing to do! You will probably regret it for the rest of your life. The people here have given you some very good advice, but you ignore everything they say. Besides, time passes quickly, and before you know it, all of your kids will be in school.

 

[flufinonis]

Please call for help. You’re really lucky to live in a country were those hotlines exists. I’m amazed at all the choices you have in the US, and the advices people has given you here, and still you prefer drilling your mind with abortion and divorce ideas and searching them in the internet.

The best you can do to your kids is stay married. If you get divorced their behaviour will get worse and the chance they grow up angry, violent, more unrespectful, get involved in drugs, alcohol, sexual promiscuity is high. You want that for them?

If right now you’re feeling like the prodigal son when he was eating the pigs’ and hogs’ food in the mud, the only thing left to do is walk back to the Father’s home. And it’s up to you take the desition to “go back”. I asure you, he’ll go running towards you, even if you’re still far away and He’ll welcome you with open arms. Or you can just stay with the pigs feeling pity for yourself.

Please take the help people is offering you.

 

[TSB4]

Kill your own child? What a creepy thing to do! You will probably regret it for the rest of your life. The people here have given you some very good advice, but you ignore everything they say. Besides, time passes quickly, and before you know it, all of your kids will be in school.

I know I will regret it. I still feel bad about my forced abortion as a teenager. However, all the hotlines in the world can’t help. The hotlines will not help our finances, won’t help keep my house and kids in order. And it won’t help my husband be more involved. These problems will still be there.

 

[TSB4]

Please call for help. You’re really lucky to live in a country were those hotlines exists. I’m amazed at all the choices you have in the US, and the advices people has given you here, and still you prefer drilling your mind with abortion and divorce ideas and searching them in the internet.

The best you can do to your kids is stay married. If you get divorced their behaviour will get worse and the chance they grow up angry, violent, more unrespectful, get involved in drugs, alcohol, sexual promiscuity is high. You want that for them?

If right now you’re feeling like the prodigal son when he was eating the pigs’ and hogs’ food in the mud, the only thing left to do is walk back to the Father’s home. And it’s up to you take the desition to “go back”. I asure you, he’ll go running towards you, even if you’re still far away and He’ll welcome you with open arms. Or you can just stay with the pigs feeling pity for yourself.

Please take the help people is offering you.

What I want for my kids is, stability. I want them to have an involved father and a mentally okay mother. I need physical help. It’s not something I WANT todo, but I feel is necessary.

 

[Truth_Faith13]

Doesn’t the unborn baby have a right to stability? An involved father and mentally stable mother? You made him/her, it’s not his/her fault he/she is alive. YOU and your husband made the baby.

I’m actually more liberal on abortion and at the end of the day, t’s your decision and yours alone, however I am not OK with an abortion used for contraceptive purposes. You obviously are not catholic so why weren’t you more careful and use protection?

Think about it carefully, you are hopping about the place too quickly to make a firm decision now. Also make sure you aren’t opting for an abortion, because it’s the one thing your hubby has no say in.

Get the help you need, hotlines will help…you won’t know until you try. They may even help your hubby come to terms with adoption. Family, Friends, Church…any support around you?it will be difficult to see at the moment, but the help is there!

 

[His_angel]

What I want for my kids is, stability. I want them to have an involved father and a mentally okay mother. I need physical help. It’s not something I WANT todo, but I feel is necessary.

But everything will not be magically better once you have an abortion. There will still be stress, your husband will still be problematic, you will still need help. Using your own logic it would be best to kill all of your children because they do not have everything they need.

You are trying to stop a sinking ship by plugging a hole, not patching the large gap. Please do not have an abortion, and focus on getting help. Call a social worker, look into others helping you and your children. That’s what foster parents are for, that’s what social programs are for- for helping mothers and fathers who cannot deal, without hurting the children.

 

[flufinonis]

Your only option is to turn back to God. Don’t you realize that the devil is strangling you? Turn back to prayer, turn back to the church, doesn’t matter if it’s catholic or not, just GO BACK!

Right now your god is money and yourself. You are the one who’s now deciding who has the right to live or not, who’s wrong who’s not, family too big, and money money money, financial problem, etc. You have to put this things in God’s hands, not yours. You’ll keep digging in the mud if you don’t.

Financial problems doesn’t mean you’re doomed. I have a friend with 7 siblings and a father who’s been jobless for 3 years. Do they have money to buy food? No. The fridge is empty. Do they die of hunger? No. Because they’ve let that in God’s hands. And somehow, they always end up eating. Someone arrives with food, money in envelopes from no one, someone payed them money he owned them from 20 years ago, a product refund they weren’t expecting, bills don’t match, etc. And they always end up saying that even if it’s hard, it’s a time of Graze, because you just rely in God’s hands. Also the family gets closer together. They enjoy simple things together, they pray together.
I know other 6 big families (from 6 to 15 kids) who’ve gone through financial problems too and they’ve all found that taking those problems in their own hands wasn’t any better. They experienced that trusting God was the best.

Is money your god? Do you really believe that Jesus suffered died and resurrected for you, because he loves you and wants to give you life? Was his sufferings less than yours? Are your problems bigger than God that he can’t help you? Even in the Bible He says not to worry about were you’re gonna live, eat or dress, but to trust Him, because we’re His children.

All the people in the world may pray for you and all the people in the world may offer the help to you, and Jesus might be waiting for you with his hand open to guide you, but all that is useless if you don’t take it and decide to rely on yourself and what the devil is whispering to you.

 

[CatholicCAGirl]

That you actually consider tying your tubes a greater sin than killing your own child is amazing to me. So far, you have taken none of the advice offered you. I’m not sure why you even asked for advice. You have taken all of it and thrown it down the toilet, with the end result being your decision to kill your baby or “end this pregnancy” as you so subtly state it. You have gotten a lot of sympathy from everyone here and it hasn’t helped you. I don’t think you seriously want any help and I suspect you may be nothing but a troll.

On the off chance that you ARE serious I registered on here specifically to write this post and try to save your baby. Nothing matters more than that child. You had all sorts of birth control readily available and FREE (yes, I’m on the pill and they are free) and instead you chose to not take any precautions whatsoever. Why were you having sex with a man that you apparently despise (possibly with good reason) and creating child after child with him? None of your choices is your baby’s fault. That you would decide to kill your baby makes me wonder what kind of mother you are to your other kids. You say you are ok with them finding out about it later. Do you have any idea how that sounds??

You baby is alive and perfectly capable of feeling pain. And it will suffer, because of you. AND YOU ALONE. There are other choices available to you. There are crisis pregnancy centers all over the country. Google it in your area. I am praying that you will do the right thing, if indeed this baby even exists.

I beg and plead on my knees to you not to kill this baby.

 

[pianistclare]

They ardmore difficult because they’re fighting, making more of a mess, they are louder, and know how to talk back. When we are out and they want something and I say no, total meltdown from my 4 year old. my 7 year old will question why, and have a million phrases to say back and challenge me. Then for the remainder of the shopping trip she will have a pouty face crying. Not saying they are horrible children, but I’m dealing with 4 little different personalities and 4 different age groups. Yes, as they get older, it is getting much harder and less enjoyable parenting them.

What Diocese are you in?
Our Archdiocese has an agency called “Village of Saint Joseph” where Catholics can get counseling near them (several locations) where the fees are based on what they can pay.
Good, solid, Catholic counselors. Professionals. Cheap. Look into it.
Whether or not you believe it’s you, or the kids, or him…there are people that can help you. This is what the Catholic Church does for its people. Look at your Diocesan website. Call them. Set up an appointment. And also talk to your pastor. So what if your husband won’t talk to a counselor. Tell him he must talk to a priest before his world blows up in his face. And you with it.
I’m on my way into the chapel to light a 7 day candle for you. Do not do anything rash that you will regret for the rest of your life.
Neither divorce, nor abortion.
When you married you professed that you would stay together for better or worse, in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad. You said that you would accept children lovingly from God. These are promised to God. Not us. Begin a relationship with God with the help of your pastor. When the 2 of your work together 100% - 100% (not 50-50) and you place God in the center of your marriage and your family…things will straighten themselves out. It’s never too late. Your cries for help are not falling on deaf ears.
Ask the ONE who can guide to…Get a sitter and go to the priest. Tell him you need to learn how to depend on God.
God bless you…I feel for you…but walking out is not the answer.
Abortion is never the answer. There are countless women suffering for both of those reasons. Don’t become a statistic. This will not help your children.
I will pray for you, I promise.

This is your come to Jesus moment. Answer the call.
Peace.

 

[TSB4]

That you actually consider tying your tubes a greater sin than killing your own child is amazing to me. So far, you have taken none of the advice offered you. I’m not sure why you even asked for advice. You have taken all of it and thrown it down the toilet, with the end result being your decision to kill your baby or “end this pregnancy” as you so subtly state it. You have gotten a lot of sympathy from everyone here and it hasn’t helped you. I don’t think you seriously want any help and I suspect you may be nothing but a troll.

On the off chance that you ARE serious I registered on here specifically to write this post and try to save your baby. Nothing matters more than that child. You had all sorts of birth control readily available and FREE (yes, I’m on the pill and they are free) and instead you chose to not take any precautions whatsoever. Why were you having sex with a man that you apparently despise (possibly with good reason) and creating child after child with him? None of your choices is your baby’s fault. That you would decide to kill your baby makes me wonder what kind of mother you are to your other kids. You say you are ok with them finding out about it later. Do you have any idea how that sounds??

You baby is alive and perfectly capable of feeling pain. And it will suffer, because of you. AND YOU ALONE. There are other choices available to you. There are crisis pregnancy centers all over the country. Google it in your area. I am praying that you will do the right thing, if indeed this baby even exists.

I beg and plead on my knees to you not to kill this baby.

First, if you believe me to be a “troll” why go through the trouble of creating an account?
Second, I WAS using something to prevent, I was doing NFP. Don’t assume without fact.
Third, I never said tying my tubes was a bigger sin in anyway. If you knew so much, you would know that my husband has been this way since he has gotten laid off and has been consumed in trying to provide. He hasn’t always been this way.
Fourth, I have taken the advice given into consideration. If you feel I am not taking it, or people are wasting their time, let this post die. I will go about life the way I did prior to coming on the Internet. I didn’t come here to upset anyone. I’m no liar, so I’m giving 100% real raw Truth and emotion.

I guess we should end the post here. No need to keep bumping it up to pass judgement. After all you yourself are on the pill and probably have a missed abortion each and every month. Have a good day.

 

[TSB4]

What Diocese are you in?
Our Archdiocese has an agency called “Village of Saint Joseph” where Catholics can get counseling near them (several locations) where the fees are based on what they can pay.
Good, solid, Catholic counselors. Professionals. Cheap. Look into it.
Whether or not you believe it’s you, or the kids, or him…there are people that can help you. This is what the Catholic Church does for its people. Look at your Diocesan website. Call them. Set up an appointment. And also talk to your pastor. So what if your husband won’t talk to a counselor. Tell him he must talk to a priest before his world blows up in his face. And you with it.
I’m on my way into the chapel to light a 7 day candle for you. Do not do anything rash that you will regret for the rest of your life.
Neither divorce, nor abortion.
When you married you professed that you would stay together for better or worse, in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad. You said that you would accept children lovingly from God. These are promised to God. Not us. Begin a relationship with God with the help of your pastor. When the 2 of your work together 100% - 100% (not 50-50) and you place God in the center of your marriage and your family…things will straighten themselves out. It’s never too late. Your cries for help are not falling on deaf ears.
Ask the ONE who can guide to…Get a sitter and go to the priest. Tell him you need to learn how to depend on God.
God bless you…I feel for you…but walking out is not the answer.
Abortion is never the answer. There are countless women suffering for both of those reasons. Don’t become a statistic. This will not help your children.
I will pray for you, I promise.

This is your come to Jesus moment. Answer the call.
Peace.

I am not apart of a diocese. I myself am not catholic. I was looking to convert but it was too late. Would have to wait for next fall. My husband was baptized catholic as an infant but ever went back to church. We were married in town hall which according to catholics, means our marriage isn’t even a valid one. Our vows didn’t include all that wording. All but accepting. Children from god. I’m not disregarding it, just clarifying.

 

[flufinonis]

A diocese is the administration of a bishop of a district, it’s the same as asking in which city, state, you live in.

 

[mommamaree]

I am so distraught over this.

TSB4,
Why won’t you try any of the things we suggested you try?
Crisis Pregnancy Center
Local Child Protective Services
Churches
Counseling
MOPS International
Mothers day out program
Hiring help with childcare and housework

Why, if you were going to choose to kill your baby, which is enough to grieve perfect strangers who have been trying to help you, would you continue to post here? Did you want to make sure we knew we failed to help you and your baby?

Don’t you think that killing your baby might affect your born children and your husband? How could they ever trust you again? It seems like you are choosing abortion out of spite, to punish your husband, since he is failing you and won’t agree to adoption.

How in the world is tying your tubes less evil than abortion?! You mentioned your pangs of conscience over sterilization and your reservations about coitus interruptus (withdrawal), yet you talk of the murder of the child of your womb as if it is a haircut. It is not ending a pregnancy. Pregnancy ends naturally when a baby is born. Abortion is a direct assault on the life of the child, killing it in the womb, and then removing it. It is not just “ending a pregnancy”.

I sincerely hope that you reconsider. Get mad at us here, get mad at your husband, get mad about your situation, but do not take the life of your child. Your child has done nothing wrong.

I understand you are overwhelmed. There is no shame in admitting that. It is good to acknowledge problems or challenges and ask for help. But you are refusing to get any help for your problems, and instead lashing out at your little baby who needs you. If you truly cannot raise the baby, you can leave the baby at any hospital, police station, or fire station, no questions asked. There are laws that allow parents to abandon babies in safe locations like that without prosecution. Find out where those locations are in your city.

And please, get counseling. You need help to be stable and safe again. Your family needs you. Don’t give up on yourself.