I don't think I can do this

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Oh dear one…
You can still come to a priest. You husband was baptized Catholic…he’s still part of the fold…just away…like the Prodigal son. He will be welcomed with open arms as will you, if you go by yourself.
The Church turns away no one.
The Church turns away no one.
Call the nearest Catholic Church. See the priest.
Our pastor counsels people like yourself (yes there are many) every week.
It’s what they are trained to do.
Please see the priest.
If you go there. pick up a bulletin also. Spiritual Director may be listed, counseling services may be advertised…
It can’t hurt.
Please try it.
Sending prayers on your behalf to the Most High.
Clare
 
TSB4 said:
I know I will regret it. I still feel bad about my forced abortion as a teenager.
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There are people who can help you with this too: rachelsvineyard.org/index.htm

There really are people out there who want to help you with all of it. The anxiety, the family chaos, the kids’ behavior, the marital issues, and even resources for financial guidance. Please reach out to them. People on hotlines may not be able to do all of this themselves, but they can help you connect to people who can. You really aren’t alone.

I am still praying for you.
 
LittleRose said:
There are people who can help you with this too: rachelsvineyard.org/index.htm

There really are people out there who want to help you with all of it. The anxiety, the family chaos, the kids’ behavior, the marital issues, and even resources for financial guidance. Please reach out to them. People on hotlines may not be able to do all of this themselves, but they can help you connect to people who can. You really aren’t alone.

I am still praying for you.
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Rachel’s Vineyard…YES.
Wonderful, caring, loving, UNDERSTANDING, compassionate program and people.
Look into it. Ask the priest about it.
❤️
 
mommamaree said:
I am so distraught over this.

TSB4,
Why won’t you try any of the things we suggested you try?
Crisis Pregnancy Center
Local Child Protective Services
Churches
Counseling
MOPS International
Mothers day out program
Hiring help with childcare and housework

Why, if you were going to choose to kill your baby, which is enough to grieve perfect strangers who have been trying to help you, would you continue to post here? Did you want to make sure we knew we failed to help you and your baby?

Don’t you think that killing your baby might affect your born children and your husband? How could they ever trust you again? It seems like you are choosing abortion out of spite, to punish your husband, since he is failing you and won’t agree to adoption.

How in the world is tying your tubes less evil than abortion?! You mentioned your pangs of conscience over sterilization and your reservations about coitus interruptus (withdrawal), yet you talk of the murder of the child of your womb as if it is a haircut. It is not ending a pregnancy. Pregnancy ends naturally when a baby is born. Abortion is a direct assault on the life of the child, killing it in the womb, and then removing it. It is not just “ending a pregnancy”.

I sincerely hope that you reconsider. Get mad at us here, get mad at your husband, get mad about your situation, but do not take the life of your child. Your child has done nothing wrong.

I understand you are overwhelmed. There is no shame in admitting that. It is good to acknowledge problems or challenges and ask for help. But you are refusing to get any help for your problems, and instead lashing out at your little baby who needs you. If you truly cannot raise the baby, you can leave the baby at any hospital, police station, or fire station, no questions asked. There are laws that allow parents to abandon babies in safe locations like that without prosecution. Find out where those locations are in your city.

And please, get counseling. You need help to be stable and safe again. Your family needs you. Don’t give up on yourself.
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I’m sorry you don’t understand. Even more sorry that you believe this doesn’t bother me at all. No reason I give will be good enough. Sorry for updating you all, it really should have been kept private.
 
You could tell us in which state you live in and people here will gadly give you all the help that can be reached within your area.
 
TSB4 said:
I’m sorry you don’t understand. Even more sorry that you believe this doesn’t bother me at all. No reason I give will be good enough. Sorry for updating you all, it really should have been kept private.
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And yet you still ignore all the other solutions offered? Come on, woman, stop and think for a moment. What reason could be given that would EVER be good enough to kill your baby? Show us that you do care and that this does bother you. Answer our questions, that will allow us to locate help for you. But don’t just make a pronouncement that you choose abortion, while simultaneously ignoring any ideas or offers of help we put forth.
 
mommamaree said:
And yet you still ignore all the other solutions offered? Come on, woman, stop and think for a moment. What reason could be given that would EVER be good enough to kill your baby? Show us that you do care and that this does bother you. Answer our questions, that will allow us to locate help for you. But don’t just make a pronouncement that you choose abortion, while simultaneously ignoring any ideas or offers of help we put forth.
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Except the fact that I’m afraid of completely losing my sanity with the added stress of a new baby and risk losing all of my children because of it. Adoption is my first choice, however it isn’t possible. I will not call child protective services on myself. I will not risk losing my other children.

I have told my husband about the appointment, he doesn’t care. He refuses to go with me so my mother will be the one to do so. I am hurting more than texted words can describe. You all can continue to think I’m doing this for selfish reasons, or I’m a horrible person. Maybe I am. For once, I think I need to make sure that I am okay. I’m always at the end of the list and I’m suffering because of it now.
 
TSB4 said:
Except the fact that I’m afraid of completely losing my sanity with the added stress of a new baby and risk losing all of my children because of it. Adoption is my first choice, however it isn’t possible. I will not call child protective services on myself. I will not risk losing my other children.

I have told my husband about the appointment, he doesn’t care. He refuses to go with me so my mother will be the one to do so. I am hurting more than texted words can describe. You all can continue to think I’m doing this for selfish reasons, or I’m a horrible person. Maybe I am. For once, I think I need to make sure that I am okay. I’m always at the end of the list and I’m suffering because of it now.
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He doesn’t care?! Why not? Your his wife, pregnant with his child. He sure as heck should care. So he won’t allow adoption, but he is indifferent to abortion?
I don’t think you are a horrible person. I am sorry if my earlier response sounded like I did. I think you are exactly what you say, overwhelmed, pushed to the limit, with no help and no support. People in a state of panic do things they would otherwise not do.
Please check out the crisis pregnancy centers from that link. And I will see what other resources I can locate for you. Perhaps we might have another CAF member familiar with the area who might be able to give you some better on the ground info about local help…
 
 
 
mommamaree said:
He doesn’t care?! Why not? Your his wife, pregnant with his child. He sure as heck should care. So he won’t allow adoption, but he is indifferent to abortion?
I don’t think you are a horrible person. I am sorry if my earlier response sounded like I did. I think you are exactly what you say, overwhelmed, pushed to the limit, with no help and no support. People in a state of panic do things they would otherwise not do.
Please check out the crisis pregnancy centers from that link. And I will see what other resources I can locate for you. Perhaps we might have another CAF member familiar with the area who might be able to give you some better on the ground info about local help…
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He doesn’t want me to do it, but says he can’t stop me. Makes me angry because he would stop an adoption. Everyone I live around would understand abortion more than adoption. Makes me so annoyed.
 
THANK YOU! This is great news. They *will *help you and likely give you ideas that have not occurred to you. God bless you.
 
You’ve obviously made your decision. I’m not entirely sure what you expect from a catholic forum, abortion is seen as murder and a reason for excommunication in the church. What did you expect to find here? “Oh yes dear, please do go and kill your baby”

There are other options, you make it sound like you haven’t even tried. I’m sorry if this isn’t the case, but we can only go by what you say here.

I’ve worked on gynae wards and seen the horror mothers go through who miscarry and see their baby. Even at an early stage you can make out their features. You’ve had an abortion and say your still struggling, but you want another? You really think it’s giving to make you feel better? It won’t.

So go and murder your baby, but don’t be surprised when you feel even more overwhelmed psychologically afterwards.

After that, get your tubes tied, send your kids to your mums for a while and sort yourself out. Your kids don’t deserve a mum willing to kill a child, they deserve better, they don’t deserve the aftermath of your emotions and should be shielded from such horrors.
 
Truth_Faith13 said:
You’ve obviously made your decision. I’m not entirely sure what you expect from a catholic forum, abortion is seen as murder and a reason for excommunication in the church. What did you expect to find here? “Oh yes dear, please do go and kill your baby”

There are other options, you make it sound like you haven’t even tried. I’m sorry if this isn’t the case, but we can only go by what you say here.

I’ve worked on gynae wards and seen the horror mothers go through who miscarry and see their baby. Even at an early stage you can make out their features. You’ve had an abortion and say your still struggling, but you want another? You really think it’s giving to make you feel better? It won’t.

So go and murder your baby, but don’t be surprised when you feel even more overwhelmed psychologically afterwards.

After that, get your tubes tied, send your kids to your mums for a while and sort yourself out. Your kids don’t deserve a mum willing to kill a child, they deserve better, they don’t deserve the aftermath of your emotions and should be shielded from such horrors.
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I hope that made you feel better. Its reassuring to know my kids don’t deserve me. Thank you. There are hundreds more threads in which you can choose to respond to. But no, you choose to respond to one where you can kick someone when they’re down. Good job. Mission accomplished. I’m done with this site. Thank you for all your judgments. I’m sure you live your life squeaky clean without a blemish. Good for you.
 
Truth_Faith13 said:
You’ve obviously made your decision. I’m not entirely sure what you expect from a catholic forum, abortion is seen as murder and a reason for excommunication in the church. What did you expect to find here? “Oh yes dear, please do go and kill your baby”

There are other options, you make it sound like you haven’t even tried. I’m sorry if this isn’t the case, but we can only go by what you say here.

I’ve worked on gynae wards and seen the horror mothers go through who miscarry and see their baby. Even at an early stage you can make out their features. You’ve had an abortion and say your still struggling, but you want another? You really think it’s giving to make you feel better? It won’t.

So go and murder your baby, but don’t be surprised when you feel even more overwhelmed psychologically afterwards.

After that, get your tubes tied, send your kids to your mums for a while and sort yourself out. Your kids don’t deserve a mum willing to kill a child, they deserve better, they don’t deserve the aftermath of your emotions and should be shielded from such horrors.
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She has and is trying but is clearly overwhelmed. The last thing an already stressed person needs is more backlash. Gentle guidance and love, my dears. Obviously OP knows this is a catholic forum and thus would persuade her away from abortion, because deep down she doesn’t want to resort to that but feels that she has no other options because of finances, lack of support, and possibly mental instability.

OP, I really wish there was more that I could do for you, except offer many many prayers. The situation seems bleak and overwhelming now but everything will be okay. Just breath (Seriously. Take some deep breathes and focus on them) and put your trust in God.
I strongly encourage you to take up some of the advice offered to you here, especially with those links that offer help near your area.
 
TSB4 said:
I hope that made you feel better. Its reassuring to know my kids don’t deserve me. Thank you. There are hundreds more threads in which you can choose to respond to. But no, you choose to respond to one where you can kick someone when they’re down. Good job. Mission accomplished. I’m done with this site. Thank you for all your judgments. I’m sure you live your life squeaky clean without a blemish. Good for you.
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I’ve responded to plenty of posts :confused:

I said they don’t deserve the aftermath of your emotions from an abortion, you’ve said yourself they deserve a stable mum. You really think you’ll be stable post abortion? It sounds like your struggling enough as it is. Get a grip woman! Sort your stuff out for your kids. If your kids can’t motivate you, nothing will.

I’ll kick someone who is willing to kill a baby for contraceptive purposes yes and when the emotions of kids are involved.
 
usccb.org/about/bishops-and-dioceses/all-dioceses.cfm

Here is a link to a page showing the Catholic dioceses in the US. Scroll down for PA. The nearest big city to you that is on the list is your diocese. Catholic dioceses actually minister to ALL persons within their diocese, not just Catholics. If you let us know which diocese you are in, we might be able to help you further. I leave that to your discretion, but please do check out this list. There are many ways in which your diocese and local parish can minister to you right now, with pastoral guidance, prayers, help from members of the community, matching up with good counseling, and more.
 
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