I don't want to but I may miss mass on All Saints Day

[tinylilron]

I am a Catholic and I mistakenly forgot about All Saints Day. My family is not Catholic and there is a lot of family drama. I am trying not to stir it up but unfortunately just being in contact with them seems to stir it up. Anyways, I have been applying to graduate school and I have a graduate school interview at a school close to them for November 1st. I was planning on taking a train and either staying with my family or a student host.

At mass today, I just realized that November 1st is All Saints Day. I actually love that day too. I am trying to see if the medical center in which the graduate school is located has a Catholic mass during the day but I have not found anything. Asking someone in my family to drive me to a Catholic church after my interview, could stir up drama and I really want to avoid it, if possible. They can sometimes harass me and make me feel bad about myself because we have different values, etc. I am looking to see if there are Catholic churches that I can walk to nearby where I might be throughout the day. But I am not sure exactly where I will be the entire day. Also, as I am searching I am not finding a lot of churches with late night masses. However, I hopefully will find more.

I think that it may be too late to reschedule my interview and I am really interested in the graduate program. What should I do? Should I just try to go and if I can’t just ask for forgiveness on Sunday before mass?

I feel bad about this, I hope that I can be forgiven. I am going to try to work it out. But if I cannot what should I do?

Thank you for all your help.

 

[1ke]

You can look into the Vigil Mass on October 31 before you go. You can also look at Mass on November 1. You can talk to your pastor ahead of time and ask about a dispensation.

It may be inconvenient but I would suggest that as an adult you will often have to make difficult decisions. You might as well start now. It may be difficult but you need to stand up for your faith.

 

[vsedriver]

Asking someone in my family to drive me to a Catholic church after my interview, could stir up drama and I really want to avoid it, if possible. They can sometimes harass me and make me feel bad about myself because we have different values, etc.

does the town you are going to have a cab service or public transportation? Google the town and Catholic churches. Many of these churches now have websites and post their schedules. I’m sure there will be evening as well as morning Masses.

 

[Reborn2013]

A lot of these Holy Days of Obligation are no longer required mass days at many OF churches. They incorporate them into the Sunday mass that is the closest on the calendar. You should check to see if this is one of those days. You may be in luck!

 

[Linusthe2nd]

I am a Catholic and I mistakenly forgot about All Saints Day. My family is not Catholic and there is a lot of family drama. I am trying not to stir it up but unfortunately just being in contact with them seems to stir it up. Anyways, I have been applying to graduate school and I have a graduate school interview at a school close to them for November 1st. I was planning on taking a train and either staying with my family or a student host.

At mass today, I just realized that November 1st is All Saints Day. I actually love that day too. I am trying to see if the medical center in which the graduate school is located has a Catholic mass during the day but I have not found anything. Asking someone in my family to drive me to a Catholic church after my interview, could stir up drama and I really want to avoid it, if possible. They can sometimes harass me and make me feel bad about myself because we have different values, etc. I am looking to see if there are Catholic churches that I can walk to nearby where I might be throughout the day. But I am not sure exactly where I will be the entire day. Also, as I am searching I am not finding a lot of churches with late night masses. However, I hopefully will find more.

I think that it may be too late to reschedule my interview and I am really interested in the graduate program. What should I do? Should I just try to go and if I can’t just ask for forgiveness on Sunday before mass?

I feel bad about this, I hope that I can be forgiven. I am going to try to work it out. But if I cannot what should I do?

Thank you for all your help.

No matter what you need to arrange your day so you can attend Mass. First thing, find out Mass times at local Chruches. You can take a cab to Mass and for the return. Your family feelings don’t excuse you from Mass. How about taking a later train so you can attend a Vigil Mass?

Linus2nd

 

[Elizium23]

A lot of these Holy Days of Obligation are no longer required mass days at many OF churches. They incorporate them into the Sunday mass that is the closest on the calendar. You should check to see if this is one of those days. You may be in luck!

This authority is delegated to episcopal conferences, not to individual parishes. The USCCB has done no such thing to All Saints Day. And I’m not sure I would call it “luck”. I view holy days as an opportunity for an outpouring of grace and favor.

 

[Starrsmother]

If it were me, I’d do my best to go to mass either at a vigil mass or on All Saints Day–even if I had to walk or take a cab. Having said that, from your post, it sounds like you are going into the medical profession and if so, as someone in the same profession, I can guarantee you that this will not be the first nor last time that you will have to miss Mass on a Sunday or Holy Day. It happens. Missing Mass for work when you must be there is always a valid excuse–unless of course you just deliberately set yourself up to work rather than to attend Mass. You might also feel better if you spoke to your priest now–while there’s still some time left before the day and get his (name removed by moderator)ut. That always helps me when I am struggling with a matter of conscience. I also agree with the posters who noted that eventually you will have to stand up for your faith with your family—however, we all pick our hills, and at a time when you are expecting them to let you stay in their home and then drive you to your church in their car on a day that most other faiths beside Catholics do not recognize as a "church day"may not be the hill you want to choose right now— or could win.

 

[tinylilron]

If it were me, I’d do my best to go to mass either at a vigil mass or on All Saints Day–even if I had to walk or take a cab. Having said that, from your post, it sounds like you are going into the medical profession and if so, as someone in the same profession, I can guarantee you that this will not be the first nor last time that you will have to miss Mass on a Sunday or Holy Day. It happens. Missing Mass for work when you must be there is always a valid excuse–unless of course you just deliberately set yourself up to work rather than to attend Mass. You might also feel better if you spoke to your priest now–while there’s still some time left before the day and get his (name removed by moderator)ut. That always helps me when I am struggling with a matter of conscience. I also agree with the posters who noted that eventually you will have to stand up for your faith with your family—however, we all pick our hills, and at a time when you are expecting them to let you stay in their home and then drive you to your church in their car on a day that most other faiths beside Catholics do not recognize as a "church day"may not be the hill you want to choose right now— or could win.

Thanks starrsmother… your right, I am… and I definitely did not deliberately schedule my interview on All Saints Day. Had I realized in advance, I probably would have rescheduled it for a different date to avoid all of this drama. I will be travelling on Oct 31st (I am travelling through several states) so vigil mass may or may not be an option. I am hoping to find a church or service in the hospital after my interview or in the evening. I don’t mind walking to a church either if I can find one in walking distance. I am checking church websites and so far I am getting almost nothing regarding All Saints Day masses. (Maybe it is too far in advance or I have to call.) I hope to finalize my travel plans soon. I am not sure of the specifics other than my interview times, which will most likely prevent me from going to a morning mass on November 1st and will last until early evening. I don’t even know where or with whom I am staying at this point so I am looking at all church options.

I consider myself a new Catholic too (a Catholic that has recently come home after my family left the church when I was younger). I know there is no excuse but there are times that I feel uncertain about certain guidelines or “rules” that the church has and as I am trying to learn and make sense of all of them I would rather not be criticized or ridiculed by my family. Especially, since they ridicule me about so much and I would rather not be stressed out as I am interviewing for this program.

I will talk to a priest. I am trying to figure out my schedule so I can go to a mass, I hope that there will be evening masses in the area or services in the hospital.

 

[Starrsmother]

Thanks starrsmother… your right, I am… and I definitely did not deliberately schedule my interview on All Saints Day. Had I realized in advance, I probably would have rescheduled it for a different date to avoid all of this drama. I will be travelling on Oct 31st (I am travelling through several states) so vigil mass may or may not be an option. I am hoping to find a church or service in the hospital after my interview or in the evening. I don’t mind walking to a church either if I can find one in walking distance. I am checking church websites and so far I am getting almost nothing regarding All Saints Day masses. (Maybe it is too far in advance or I have to call.) I hope to finalize my travel plans soon. I am not sure of the specifics other than my interview times, which will most likely prevent me from going to a morning mass on November 1st and will last until early evening. I don’t even know where or with whom I am staying at this point so I am looking at all church options.
eE
I consider myself a new Catholic too (a Catholic that has recently come home after my family left the church when I was younger). I know there is no excuse but there are times that I feel uncertain about certain guidelines or “rules” that the church has and as I am trying to learn and make sense of all of them I would rather not be criticized or ridiculed by my family. Especially, since they ridicule me about so much and I would rather not be stressed out as I am interviewing for this program.

I will talk to a priest. I am trying to figure out my schedule so I can go to a mass, I hope that there will be evening masses in the area or services in the hospital.

A very wise priest once reminded me that Jesus stated that the law was made FOR man–not man for the law–another words, God knows your heart and rules are there to help you not just to see if you won’t somehow screw up and break one. My field is OB-Gyn. Plus my Dad died on Christmas Eve in 1981—AND I have 5 kids, now all adults but not for years of course… Being off work on Christmas Eve and Day was a major goal in my life for over 30 years–and I mean a MAJOR goal. I always–even while I had technically fallen away from the faith–wanted to go to Mass on Christmas–preferably midnight mass–but hey, beggars aren’t choosers. I guarantee you though, that if there was any one woman left out there at least 35 weeks along, no matter how unlikely it seemed, she would deliver right in the middle of whenever I had planned to be at Mass! Sometimes I’d get to the church and get paged as I stepped out of my car. I could offer to induce any woman 38 weeks or more along a week in advance–and still end up in L&D all night and day on Christmas! It became a sort of cheap family joke at my house that either my Dad didn’t want me at Mass or God was really mad at me for not being a faithful Catholic at that time–but for whatever it’ worth–just remember as you go forward in your career that an old lady warned you–and I suspect it holds true for folks having MI’s, breaking bones, etc etc. as well as pregnant ladies! Lol!!

 

[1ke]

A lot of these Holy Days of Obligation are no longer required mass days at many OF churches.

It is not a local decision. You seem confused on that issue, as if individual parish churches make such a decision. The HDOO are universal, and bishop’s conferences can adjust them with approval from the Holy See.

They incorporate them into the Sunday mass that is the closest on the calendar.

Not exactly. You may be thinking of Ascension which is, in some locations, transferred to Sunday.

But, in other cases only the *obligation *is abbrogated, the feast is still celebrated on that day such as when the HDOO falls on a Saturday or Monday.

You should check to see if this is one of those days. You may be in luck!

It is not. All Saints is a HDOO in the US this year.

 

[jediliz]

A lot of these Holy Days of Obligation are no longer required mass days at many OF churches. They incorporate them into the Sunday mass that is the closest on the calendar. You should check to see if this is one of those days. You may be in luck!

no, that’s only Ascension Thursday as far as I know. Not every Holy Day is like that. November 3rd will be a regular Sunday Liturgy.

Can you try to make it to the Vigil Mass on October 31st? Do you know anyone in the neighborhood that goes to Catholic church that could give you a ride?

 

[catholictiger]

I am a Catholic and I mistakenly forgot about All Saints Day. My family is not Catholic and there is a lot of family drama. I am trying not to stir it up but unfortunately just being in contact with them seems to stir it up. Anyways, I have been applying to graduate school and I have a graduate school interview at a school close to them for November 1st. I was planning on taking a train and either staying with my family or a student host.

At mass today, I just realized that November 1st is All Saints Day. I actually love that day too. I am trying to see if the medical center in which the graduate school is located has a Catholic mass during the day but I have not found anything. Asking someone in my family to drive me to a Catholic church after my interview, could stir up drama and I really want to avoid it, if possible. They can sometimes harass me and make me feel bad about myself because we have different values, etc. I am looking to see if there are Catholic churches that I can walk to nearby where I might be throughout the day. But I am not sure exactly where I will be the entire day. Also, as I am searching I am not finding a lot of churches with late night masses. However, I hopefully will find more.

I think that it may be too late to reschedule my interview and I am really interested in the graduate program. What should I do? Should I just try to go and if I can’t just ask for forgiveness on Sunday before mass?

I feel bad about this, I hope that I can be forgiven. I am going to try to work it out. But if I cannot what should I do?

Thank you for all your help.

travel is a reason to miss a holy day of obligation or sunday. What it sounds like is that circumstances makes it difficult for you to go to a holy day of obligation. Because of this you have a reason to miss mass. But talk to your pastor and get his advice.

 

[tinylilron]

Can you try to make it to the Vigil Mass on October 31st? Do you know anyone in the neighborhood that goes to Catholic church that could give you a ride?

I don’t really know many people in the area other than my family who are all pretty much agnostic or against the Catholic church. As for Vigil mass I will be travelling on October 31st and arriving in the evening to the state where the school is. I am trying to locate churches that offer masses during times that I would be able to go. I might be able to attend one at 5:30PM in a town that my father lives on November 1st, which is an hour or so away from the school, if I am staying with him (my parents are divorced as well). But so far, that is up in the air. At this time, I have no idea where I will be staying or who will be driving me to my interview or anything. I may even be staying with a student host rather than my family at least for the evening of October 31st into November 1st. I know my interview goes from the morning on November 1st to early afternoon and I don’t know if I am expected to stay there after that.11

Essentially, my transportation may be dependent on my nuclear family (who are agnostics, anti-Catholics, they left the Catholic church when I was young) from the evening of October 31st to the morning of November 2nd. I am going to try my best to make it to a mass on the evening of October 31st or after my interview on November 1st, but I already think that it may be challenging.

Maybe I can ask to borrow a car for the day… I am not sure if it would fly but it is worth looking into…

 

[jediliz]

I don’t really know many people in the area other than my family who are all pretty much agnostic or against the Catholic church. As for Vigil mass I will be travelling on October 31st and arriving in the evening to the state where the school is. I am trying to locate churches that offer masses during times that I would be able to go. I might be able to attend one at 5:30PM in a town that my father lives on November 1st, which is an hour or so away from the school, if I am staying with him (my parents are divorced as well). But so far, that is up in the air. At this time, I have no idea where I will be staying or who will be driving me to my interview or anything. I may even be staying with a student host rather than my family at least for the evening of October 31st into November 1st. I know my interview goes from the morning on November 1st to early afternoon and I don’t know if I am expected to stay there after that.11

Essentially, my transportation may be dependent on my nuclear family (who are agnostics, anti-Catholics, they left the Catholic church when I was young) from the evening of October 31st to the morning of November 2nd. I am going to try my best to make it to a mass on the evening of October 31st or after my interview on November 1st, but I already think that it may be challenging.

Maybe I can ask to borrow a car for the day… I am not sure if it would fly but it is worth looking into…

Talk to your pastor and explain the situation, as someone else said, you might be able to get a dispensation. Maybe the school you are going to for the interview has a catholic chapel/parish for Catholic university students and may have a Mass at different times for the Holy Day.

 

[larsont7]

I am a Catholic and I mistakenly forgot about All Saints Day. My family is not Catholic and there is a lot of family drama. I am trying not to stir it up but unfortunately just being in contact with them seems to stir it up. Anyways, I have been applying to graduate school and I have a graduate school interview at a school close to them for November 1st. I was planning on taking a train and either staying with my family or a student host.

At mass today, I just realized that November 1st is All Saints Day. I actually love that day too. I am trying to see if the medical center in which the graduate school is located has a Catholic mass during the day but I have not found anything. Asking someone in my family to drive me to a Catholic church after my interview, could stir up drama and I really want to avoid it, if possible. They can sometimes harass me and make me feel bad about myself because we have different values, etc. I am looking to see if there are Catholic churches that I can walk to nearby where I might be throughout the day. But I am not sure exactly where I will be the entire day. Also, as I am searching I am not finding a lot of churches with late night masses. However, I hopefully will find more.

I think that it may be too late to reschedule my interview and I am really interested in the graduate program. What should I do? Should I just try to go and if I can’t just ask for forgiveness on Sunday before mass?

I feel bad about this, I hope that I can be forgiven. I am going to try to work it out. But if I cannot what should I do?

Thank you for all your help.

What city (cities) will you be in on the 31st and the 1st? Perhaps with more specific info, people on CAF will be able to give you specific Mass times at their parishes. You may even be able to find someone willing to give you a ride.