I feel very very frustrated

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Lara said:
Your line about being 22 and therefore more able to empathize with the OP than some of the older folks gave me a real chuckle. I think every older person has experienced the OP’s feelings many times.
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For sure. We were all 22 once. I had groups of friends who made me feel like a real Goody Two Shoes with my behavior and then I met other people who were so strait-laced they disapproved if I went out to a club even though I didn’t drink, didn’t pick up men and was only wanting to hear a band and dance. It was hard to navigate a path between the two extremes, and I don’t think I always did the best job, that’s one of the pitfalls of youth.

I do think that people in their teens and 20s can be extremely judgmental and critical of each other because they’re each trying to figure out their own value system and the grass often looks greener on somebody else’s side. Young people constantly compare themselves to others and sort of have to justify their own choices. Some people keep this behavior up for life, while others grow out of this as they age and reach the point where they are comfortable with their own choices and don’t bother much with how their friends choose.
 
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I’m in my late 20’s. I’m a virgin, and the oldest person I know of at all who also is one is a Sicilian girl I met abroad who is ashamed of her virginity and eager to lose it. She’s a sweet girl, but damned if society hasn’t gotten to her head. I love her to death. She’s 23. I hope she doesn’t do something she’ll regret. Even if I weren’t at all religious, I wouldn’t want to lose my virginity. Maybe one day I’ll marry, maybe I won’t, but I’d truly rather die than make a mistake of that magnitude. I’ve made too many others to screw with the last vestige of self-respect I have left.

Who gives a damn what other people are doing? Maybe by your mid or late twenties you’ll learn to stop caring, but it would be a good idea to stop caring now. Your concern isn’t altruistic so don’t pretend you’re being frustrated for God’s sake. You’re, well…“frustrated”. The solution doesn’t have to be to lock yourself in a convent for life. Find out who the most awesome version of you is or would be and what your passions and hobbies and talents are and just be happy. At 23 I had so many troubles and so much blues your poor little popular heart would break just hearing about it, but I still managed to not give a damn about mainstream society and felt pretty good most of the time anyway. Loosen up. Stop caring. Pray for a good husband if you want one. What’s the actual problem here? Sexual frustration? Welcome to your 20s as a virgin. Channel it the best you can into something enjoyable and creative. Be chill. Good luck.
 
You have to consider that most girls read a lot of the magazines telling us how to live and how to love. Once you started reading that the idea that you aren’t living if you’re not doing what they say will be hard to give up. It was hard for me stop. Now when I pick up one of those mags I realize the advices are constantly the same, boring, there is no change even if they have monthly issues. How did I see that before?
I think you shouldn’t consider yourself frustrated just tempted to judge others. Frustrated is a modern term, is deeply linked with dr. Freud’s theory on sanity based on sexuality. Today we must be frustrated if we don’t stay in line with others.
Try to concentrate on your joy in believing in God and don’t think too much about what will God say about them.
A priest one said that some receive the Eucharist for salvation and others for damnation. This confused and scared me. It feels true though. I know feelings aren’t always right but I am the way I am - emotional.
The bitterness comes from the devil who doesn’t want us to enjoy our faith. Remember the Joys Christ told us about. He said that “happy are those who cry”. And He never said it would be easy.
But it’s harder to rise back after you fall than stay true as you were in the beginning and not fall. It will be harder for them when they do realize they are wrong and I believe most people will in the end.
I think we do vapid things and try to make noise in our life because we do not seek some sort of pain, just not the right one. We seek a broken heart and we don’t know what to do with it when we get one but we have strayed too far from God.
Try to see something else in all your friends and family, not this. And do something nice for someone whenever you feel like being angry at them and I found the nasty feeling and frustration goes. The devil simply is not all that powerful and he doesn’t know the future, our future, he attacks us based on what he’s seen us do wrong. If we surprise him he trips over and goes back where he came from. 😂
 
To any young person who feels frustrated about one’s own way following Christ’s doctrine instead of all others. Such feelings are totally redundant, for such frustrations are a burden we unnecessarily load upon us ourselves.
On the contrary we got all reason to feel „above it all“. Still - let’s NEVER feel misproud over it, and never feel off realities of life. Jesus too mixed up with all realities of life - therefore was named by some as in Luke 7,34: …a glutton and a drunkard, a friend of tax collectors and sinners.“ Same today many think of our great Pope Francis, because he least of all feels „above it all“, but he’s „ONE OF US“ - same as Christ was, when he became fully human (and fully God).

Even to feel „ashamed“ because one’s „never been out with anyone before nor had first sexual experience before marriage, means to give room for false ideas and customs, which disregard all properness and take paragon on Zeitgeist rather than on Christian righteousness. Adding, mind that St. Paul wrote in: 1 Cor 6,16: Do you not know that he who unites himself with a prostitute is one with her in body? For it is said, “The two will become one flesh.”

I’m an old man and even married later than all my friends did. Still, neither I nor my wife Eva ever had any sexual contacts before our wedding. We had two sons, and it’s ever so relieving not to be burdened with thoughts of previous contacts.

No, our Church does not need to change the stance on birth control and premarital sex, for God does not ever change His doctrine. The Bible is as valid as it ever was. Any time human beings exist, was the most modern world ever, as there was no time before. „Modern world“ is nothing but Zeitgeist and there is not a single evidence, that Zeitgeist is right, it’s just a more careless way of thinking, same as Psalm 73 tells.
Is carelessness about our real life after death any better? No! - Much more burdensome!

He who feels to practice the Catholic doctrine is too restrictive, simply didn’t understand belief.
No pupil, no workman, no clerk, not even parents or children can do whatever they want. Not even in one’s hobby one can do as one pleases. In all there are certain restrictions. One wouldn’t ever surf out in the blue of the endless sea - however joyful this at first moments would be. Nor would one walk further than the clip’s edge.

continued below…
 
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Now of all restrictions we know and observe as inevitable, Christian rules and regulations are easy and most satisfying because they provide a almost tangible nearness to God.
I hardly dare to say so, but one doesn’t have to attend the Holy Mass EVERY Sunday for one can hollow God’s own day in other ways too. One doesn’t strictly have to avoid a steak on Friday, for that’s not part of Christ’s doctrine. One must not think all sorts of things are sin.
Sin much more so, is lack of love, for as St. James told us in Jas 2,14-19: What good is it, my if someone claims to have faith but does not have works of love?..………You believe that God is one; well and good. Even the demons believe that – and tremble with fear.

All got restrictions and orders in every aspect of life. But the nicest are those of Christ, as we indeed feel a joyful satisfaction when we keep them, for then we are with God, and God is near us, and we will be with God in eternity.

Yours
Bruno
 
Jesus knew that we would deal with these feelings of resentment, and He gave us some lessons on those feelings. When looking at Scripture and when we see how few actual words of Christ are recorded, it drives home to me how important those lessons really are.

Meditate on the parable of the prodigal son in Luke 15 and really think about the elder brother.

Meditate on the parable of the late workers in the vineyard in Matthew 20.

There is also last Sunday’s reading of the wise virgins.
 
Good day ImmaCatholic

Rejoice!

You are at the beginning of life, I am nearer the other end. I am a rules guy. I love rules, they let me know what is expected of me and how well I am doing.

It used to peeve me no end that others broke the rules,…and got away with it! Can you imagine? Then I realized some things.

Judge not lest yee be judged.
Life does not need to be a competition.
He (or she) who gets away with the most does not really win.
What they do is between them and God.
I have a really hard time keeping myself in his grace. I do not have time to do so for others.
With the exception of my wife, there is no one other than me I need to worry about keeping streight with God. (All of our children are adults).
Unless someone else asks, (as you did) it isn’t my business.

Just a few thoughts. I hope they help.
 
It is best to stay out of all these relationships because they are not going to last. It is a really good thing to avoid ungodly people. Proverbs 13:20 “Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm.” I think the best way to avoid getting upset is to have a devotion to the passion of Jesus. There are some good devotions like the Divine Mercy Chaplet, The Sorrowful Mysteries of the Rosary, and the Way of the Cross (I like the one by Saint Francis and the one by Saint Alphonsus Liguori) It is good way to realize how much proofs of God there are. Fornication and contraceptives are mortal sins and receiving Holy Communion in such a state is a great sacrilege. It is really frustrating to see people like this who soil the Church because of their own selfish desires. Reading books by saints helps to know and want to love God better because we can see the way they thought and what motivations they had to perform such virtuous acts. There are some good spiritual books for free online but you have to know the titles. I think they have a list in one of the forums here.
 
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