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John_of_Woking

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Hello I have confessed this as a sin of omission - should I have gone into more detail ? Scenario : I was playing golf on Saturday with three friends on a stag weekend. The group behind unleashed a mammoth drive which ended up near my ball. we were playing Texan scrambles and my pal asked if the other group’s ball was one of ours . I said " no" but my golf partner drowned me out and said it was and instructed my mate to pocket the ball. I repeated my point but to no avail. As we were teeing up at the next hole a fellow from the group behind hurtled up and asked if we had taken his golf ball. I said I think my friend may have accidentally picked it up but my friend lied and said he hadn’t. Later I confronted him(an agnostic) and said I would give it back to save him face but he and the others said to leave it as it’s no big deal. I insisted and went to take the ball but my brother stopped me. We then let the group behind play through as a gesture of good will whilst I quizzed my brother - the only other christian as to his actions. He said to forget it. Then a minute later - out of the blue he said " Go on then you can give it to them if you want". It took me by surprise and the courage I had previously plucked up had evaporated and the group, by now in front, were just completing their shots - so my window of opportunity was quickly over and my chance gone. My question is - should I have confessed this as an accomplice to theft or was a sin of omission adequate ?
 
John, please discuss with your priest. If you tend towards scrupulosity you need a regular confessor to help you distinguish between things that are sins and things that aren’t.
 
Make it simple.Say i knew a friend of mine stole a golf ball on the course and I didn’t tell when I should have.
 
John,

I think we’ve all had times where we’ve been in those “rock and a hard place” situations. I personally think you were taken off guard by your friends’ reaction and inaction.

Due to this happening, you now know the range of honesty / dishonesty that your friends are capable of. In a small way, you’ve been given a clear example of how friendships can pull us into “near occasion of sin”.

I know from my own experience that when I’ve been dishonest in small things it created in me an ability to become more dishonesty in greater things.

Should this ever happen again with these golfing buddies, you might just pull a ball out of your bag and blame the mistake on yourself. No argument and the occurance is over and done with.

Or, find honest golfing buddies who don’t embarass you with their actions 🙂
 
1ke said:
John, please discuss with your priest. If you tend towards scrupulosity you need a regular confessor to help you distinguish between things that are sins and things that aren’t.
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Good advice 👍

It seems to me John that you are focusing too much on your one act of hesitation and completely forgetting all the times you tried to do the right thing. You did your best to correct the situation but ran into heavy resistance. You mentioned that you already confessed the sin of omission. If the priest needed more detail he would have asked for it.
 
St. Teresa of Avila used to say that we are human beings- not angels. Why are you being so hard on yourself? You have already confessed it as a sin of omission. Jesus has forgiven you for your ‘flaw’. And that’s what it was- a flaw. Don’t beat yourself up for being human and ‘freezing up’ in such a situation. I, too, struggle very much with scrupulousity. There is one book that I read over and over again because it helps me keep things in perspective. It’s called I Believe in Love by Father d’Elbee. It’s based on the teachings of St. Therese- who is one of the best saints to follow in overcoming scrupulosity. I honestly think it would really help you find more peace in your spiritual life. God bless!
 
John,

I don’t think you’re being scrupulous. You’re realizing that you will always need to be the example of Christ with your two golfing buddies. And you will be painted with the brush that people slap them with.

I own a service business with employees who perform services in homes while people are at work. My business reputation rests on the actions of the people I send into other people’s home.

It’s no little thing to me - should I see a person stick a golf ball in their pocket when it isn’t their ball. And then lie about it to the person’s face.
 
Thanks all. I do indeed suffer from scrupulosity but am trying to stay sane 😛
 
John_of_Woking said:
Thanks all. I do indeed suffer from scrupulosity but am trying to stay sane 😛
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just keep in mind that there is such thing as venial “petty” theft, which i think this falls under, and likewise the dishonesty was not seriously harmful and so it also probably falls under venial,
although don’t get me wrong, they were still sins and even venial sins should be taken very seriously, but all the same, don’t let it rob you of your peace, instead try to turn it into something good by learning from it.

ok hope this helps, take care.
 
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