I don’t know about 20 Hail Marys and 10 Our Fathers, but 35 years of heartache seems like a serious penance to me.
Thank you for your kind words. I do really know I am forgiven by my confessor but I still feel much heartache for what I have done. On a positive note, my son who I did not bring up in the Faith is now coming into the Church and will be Confirmed and make his First Holy Communion very soon and I have now fulfilled my commitment to Our Lord and brought this one to Him. I still regret my lost one forever and will until the day I die.
You are confessing this as a sin now … even after you’ve been forgiven sacramentally and God has put the sin as far from you as East from West (as scripture puts it).
:nope:Lord, thank you for Mayogirl, her beautiful spirit and her deep sense of the destruction of sin. May she continue to bless others and enlighten those who are about to make great mistakes as she did so long ago. Strengthen her with the reminder of all the gifts of your Holy Spirit you so graciously give us at Confirmation (that we so often forget about).
Again, God bless you and thank you Mayogirl.18 Come now, let us set things right, says the LORD: Though your sins be like scarlet, they may become white as snow; Though they be crimson red, they may become white as wool.:yup:
Thank you for your kind words but I hardly feel as though I can be held up as a symbol for anyone in the same circumstance. I also don’t feel that Our Lord forgets our sins either. They all come to roost eventually. I know I am forgiven my sins through my confessor but they do still weigh heavily upon my heart and I will always have them with me. Much love to you.You are confessing this as a sin now … even after you’ve been forgiven sacramentally and God has put the sin as far from you as East from West (as scripture puts it).
This is generous and humble of you. This helps others. You may be saving a life right now for all you know … enlightening a poor confused girl who is being lied to. Or a young man who has been taught that paying for an abortion is the “responsible thing to do!”
You now love life, and while your hurt may be with you … it might be a holy thing that you can offer up. And (the best news of all) you don’t know what God might do. Jesus said “I am the Resurrection and the Life!” and “Behold I make all things new again …” so cast your cares upon Him … and if your heart is pierced with a sword like our Blessed Mother it may be your cross and holiness.
I thank you so much for posting this my dear sister. Believe me, I have sinned too. I will not confess my past sins here and now … since God has forgotten them, I am in the process of it too – except that they are a reminder to me to be merciful and patient and kind to others when I am ***sinned against! ***
To your question … YES you are really forgiven. More than that, you now know right from wrong more than you did … and are enlightening others. This might be your ministry (since I see you are already DOING it).
Lord, thank you for Mayogirl, her beautiful spirit and her deep sense of the destruction of sin. May she continue to bless others and enlighten those who are about to make great mistakes as she did so long ago. Strengthen her with the reminder of all the gifts of your Holy Spirit you so graciously give us at Confirmation (that we so often forget about).
*And remember Mayo, you can tell others who are having a hard time forgiving themselves about confession and the loving Lord who tells us all:
*
Again, God bless you and thank you Mayogirl.
I praise and thank God for your son’s return, believing that his sibling is praying for him and you. You little one loves you and forgives, and prays for you both.
… AND*There seems to be an exception to this (if WE do not forgive others who have sinned against us … see Jesus’ parable of the wicked servant who is forgiven, yet does not forgive another). So in THAT case, yes, sins CAN come home to roost (beyond our regrets). *
May that be the case with us.When we find ourselves self-accused again to our detriment, it’s a good time to dwell on
kpeople: – and on and on …you are truly forgiven if you went to confession with a contrite heart
Hon you are truely forgiven by God!
Will you choose to forgive your self? To love yourself, and do what is best for your soul? Will you stop punishing yourself? The loss of your sweet child is suffering enough. Be healed my friend by God’s Divine Mercy!Never allow yourself to count your finite sin above the infinite mercy and love of Jesus. His mercy is above all sins, accept it and find healing with the opportunities that other posters here have suggested.
I share your burdens in that I also had an abortion, 2 actually and I also share your sense of guilt and shame. I know that as a woman I feel the whole burden I’ve never felt that the man shared this burden for some reason. I have spina bifida and very nieve and I got pregnant at 17I didnt know what to do so I had an abortion. I have regretted that decision from that first day. I met my husband years later and fell pregnant, I was delighted but he was not happy and told me to either abort the baby or lose him. I chose to abort my baby and I feel such shame and disgust in myself for doing it. I fell pregnant again and I again I was delighted but my husband wasn’t. But I refused to abort this baby and when our daughter was 10 months old he left us. I now have a beautiful 21 year old daughter who is truly my world. The shame I feel at having had the abortions has never gone, and my heart will ache with it forever.
When we commit a sin, in addition to wounding our souls, we often wound nature as well. And sometimes we can’t undo or repair that wound because it’s beyond our control. Your sin is forgiven and you are able to live in God’s grace, but there is a part of you that will take a lifetime (or longer) to heal, and there is a part of the world that can never be restored to the way it should have been. Part of forgiveness is learning to accept the permanently changed circumstances of life that were brought about by the offense, and something like Rachel’s Vineyard helps women to do that. I echo the other posters in recommending them.
I have not read through all of the replies - I am sure they are all good. But I thought I would add something.