I have a guilty conscience

[LoyalViews]

I hope this belongs here, if not, mods, please move it!

So, I’ve always had a bit of a guilty conscience. It got even worse today.

Here’s my scenario.

I was playing hockey today, (I rarely play hockey, I’ve horrible hand-eye coordination, and I am extremely clumsy and plain idiotic sometimes) and I happened to hit my friend over the head with the stick, and I didn’t even realise. I never did it purposefully, or with any intentions. I didn’t even know I did it in the first place! It was with the back of the stick, and it was because I was chasing after our makeshift “puck”. I later went over to the poor lad and asked him was it I who did such a thing, and he said yes. I apologised, he just shook it off and said it was no big deal, it was okay.

Now I feel absolutely horrible and can’t get out of it. I don’t think I need a counsellor or anything, it’s not so bad that it controls my life, or prevents me from doing things and going places. Not near that bad, but still, I feel terrible.

What can I do to help myself? Anyone like myself?

Thanks in advanced!

God Bless :byzsoc:

 

[bbentrup]

It seems to me as if you have three duties:

1. the duty to apologize- check!
2. the duty to make reparations - sounds like he suffered no damages, but you can check
3. the duty to learn your lesson and act more prudently in the future (if that act can be subjected to a prudence analysis, it’s hard for me to visualize exactly what you did).

If you feel you have completed these three, get over it and move on, for everyone’s sake. God bless!

 

[grasscutter]

You behaved exactly appropriately! And yes, it’s okay to move on… no need to torture yourself or others by continuing to feel bad. But, on a selfish note, it’s nice to read that some people actually do feel bad about (in this case, inadvertent) harm.

 

[Leegal]

I hope this belongs here, if not, mods, please move it!

So, I’ve always had a bit of a guilty conscience. It got even worse today.

Here’s my scenario.

I was playing hockey today, (I rarely play hockey, I’ve horrible hand-eye coordination, and I am extremely clumsy and plain idiotic sometimes) and I happened to hit my friend over the head with the stick, and I didn’t even realise. I never did it purposefully, or with any intentions. I didn’t even know I did it in the first place! It was with the back of the stick, and it was because I was chasing after our makeshift “puck”. I later went over to the poor lad and asked him was it I who did such a thing, and he said yes. I apologised, he just shook it off and said it was no big deal, it was okay.

Now I feel absolutely horrible and can’t get out of it. I don’t think I need a counsellor or anything, it’s not so bad that it controls my life, or prevents me from doing things and going places. Not near that bad, but still, I feel terrible.

What can I do to help myself? Anyone like myself?

Thanks in advanced!

God Bless :byzsoc:

Forgive yourself. Okay, sometimes we are harder on ourselves than anyone else. It was not intentional, you apologized, he seems okay. You must work on forgiving yourself. I know, easier said than done. Pray for it. I might check up on him tomorrow, just in case though.

Uh, yeah. We have all done this to ourselves. Ruminated over some guilt.

 

[OxenHandler]

(I rarely play hockey, I’ve horrible hand-eye coordination, and I am extremely clumsy and plain idiotic sometimes)… Anyone like myself?

LoyalViews,

There are strong masochistic drifts in your post. Masochism is a morbid choice which will seriously impede your spiritual health. You can and must learn to stop doing it or you will never be happy because you will be unable to give to others from your strength.

Please search for, find, read and contemplate the papers of psychoanalyst, Bernhard Berliner, which were published in the “The Psychoanalytic Quarterly”. One is titled, “On Some Psychodynamics of Masochism” (1947) and another is “The Role of Object Relations in Moral Masochism” (1958).

In essence, masochism is a strategy of some persons who in early life, loved care givers (parents) who hated them.

Please pm me if you would life to discuss this.

 

[Bill1940]

Don’t let yourself wallow in undeserved guilt. It was nothing you willed or reflected upon, or endowed with moral content, as it was an accident. Fuggeddaboudit! If you have little talent for hockey, find an activity which you can do well. More important, think about why you have reacted this way. Is it an isolated experience or a habitual disposition? If the latter, consult your spiritual advisor/confessor, and if he so advises, get other professional counseling. Happy Thanksgiving.

 

[LoyalViews]

Thanks everyone. I’m over it now. To the poster who suggested masochism – I’m hardly that, trust me