I have some concerns

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I don’t know if this is the right thread to talk about this. If it is not I hope you all are not too harsh on me. 😃
Okay, so first off I want to say how I have been struggling with lust for a long period of time. I find it hard to control myself in that sense and I feel bad every time I don’t. Because of this I rarely receive the Eucharist which in turn causes me to become further away from God.
Secondly, I recently have started feeling empty because I have never really found my true self and don’t express myself to others. I do have friends but it is still troublesome for me to find a connection with them at times.
Lastly, I also wish I could form a meaningful relationship with a significant other although I never could. Recently, I have been talking to a girl through text but, I am not sure if we will ever be more. I want to be closer and happier yet, I feel stuck during this stage of my life. I didn’t mean to bore anyone and it would be in my greatest interest to have a word of advice. Thank you for reading. 🙂
 
The journey to God is different for every one of us because we are unique and created by God with a part in his Divine Plan. It’s easy to get bogged down with the day to day living and when you are young it is all-consuming, but when you get closer to the end (and be careful here because nobody knows when the end comes except our loving father!) you begin to see that the important thing is YOU WERE BORN and have a chance at ETERNAL LIFE! Try to stay close to God and the church. Probably you are going to make mistakes because we all do. Every time you realize your mistake tell God you are sorry and go to confession, especially go to Communion. Don’t give up on God. About relationships–they are part of life and until you are settled you are going to have questions and doubts. (Should I tell you that even after you are settled–you will have questions and doubts?) Keep praying that you can follow God’s will for you. It’s not a joke. God is real, He has a plan for you, He loves you more than you can imagine. Offer up to Him your questions and confusion and doubts… I’m glad you were born and have a chance to be with God in Heaven… I’ll be praying for you.
 
I greatly appreciate it petra22. 🙂 I am glad to know that there are people out there that have the time to read my concerns and lend a helping hand. It will not be easy for me but, I now know I have to keep praying and trust in God in his plans for me.
 
JourneytoGod said:
I don’t know if this is the right thread to talk about this. If it is not I hope you all are not too harsh on me. 😃
Okay, so first off I want to say how I have been struggling with lust for a long period of time. I find it hard to control myself in that sense and I feel bad every time I don’t. Because of this I rarely receive the Eucharist which in turn causes me to become further away from God.
Secondly, I recently have started feeling empty because I have never really found my true self and don’t express myself to others. I do have friends but it is still troublesome for me to find a connection with them at times.
Lastly, I also wish I could form a meaningful relationship with a significant other although I never could. Recently, I have been talking to a girl through text but, I am not sure if we will ever be more. I want to be closer and happier yet, I feel stuck during this stage of my life. I didn’t mean to bore anyone and it would be in my greatest interest to have a word of advice. Thank you for reading. 🙂
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did not bore me. You are looking for someone to love. I think lust is a common temptation for the young. Keep up the good fight and God bless you
 
My advice, and you may already do this, is to talk to Our Lady, either in informal prayer or through the Rosary. She can help you with your situation in a huge way. I think, speaking from my own experience, that our Lord can oftentimes use the desire for a deeper relationship with others, or someone else in particular, as the impetus for spiritual growth, both in our relations to Him and, obviously, establishing more meaningful relations with others. If you’re wanting to grow, you’re already on the right track. I’ll keep you in my prayers.
 
I greatly appreciate your words Billy112. Thank you for your help.🙂
 
Guys I just wanted to add that I recently found out that I get too attached to girls I like and then get really down when they don’t return the affection. I am having trouble with letting go. I don’t know why I’m so weak in this area… I have a question for you guys, how do you guys feel complete when your alone? I would love to feel happy with myself and I feel this is holding me back.
P.S. I know this is not a group session but, I found you’re advice helpful last time and would like to see your views. Again thanks for your time.
 
JourneytoGod said:
I don’t know if this is the right thread to talk about this. If it is not I hope you all are not too harsh on me. 😃
Okay, so first off I want to say how I have been struggling with lust for a long period of time. I find it hard to control myself in that sense and I feel bad every time I don’t. Because of this I rarely receive the Eucharist which in turn causes me to become further away from God.
Secondly, I recently have started feeling empty because I have never really found my true self and don’t express myself to others. I do have friends but it is still troublesome for me to find a connection with them at times.
Lastly, I also wish I could form a meaningful relationship with a significant other although I never could. Recently, I have been talking to a girl through text but, I am not sure if we will ever be more. I want to be closer and happier yet, I feel stuck during this stage of my life. I didn’t mean to bore anyone and it would be in my greatest interest to have a word of advice. Thank you for reading. 🙂
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It’s ME! 😉 Seriously, I could have written this post about 20 years ago.

What worked for me was to let God do His work with me and prepare me for my future “mrs ahs”. I went to confession weekly to make sure I could receive Eucharist…and with out that I don’t think I would have made it out of my 20’s.
God is working on you to prepare you for His Will. Let Him. Don’t get bogged down with “it’s taking too long” or “but I’m miserable right now”, or “by the time He’s done what needs to be done, I’ll be an old fart…”. Just let Him do His work; do your own due diligence at staying in grace; and trust. Whether it’s 5 years from now, or 20, He will bless you more than you can imagine. I guarantee it.

OH! I forgot to add that I found counseling to be helpful and life changing. It helped me to figure out why I was not opening up to others and to be more outgoing. I made more solid friendships, even if they were very few. 🙂
 
JourneytoGod said:
Guys I just wanted to add that I recently found out that I get too attached to girls I like and then get really down when they don’t return the affection. I am having trouble with letting go. I don’t know why I’m so weak in this area…
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Yes, that was totally me as well. I doubt that will ever fully go away. I still struggle with similar issues myself, but in different ways. It’s part of the personality. I would bet a box of do-nuts that you are very empathetic and make deep connections with people, regardless of whether they do with you. (Are you a middle child?) Only time will help here…time to learn to let people be who they are, and to let go, even when it hurts.
I have a question for you guys, how do you guys feel complete when your alone? I would love to feel happy with myself and I feel this is holding me back.
P.S. I know this is not a group session but, I found you’re advice helpful last time and would like to see your views. Again thanks for your time.
Click to expand...
That’s the kicker, isn’t it? Man was not made to feel complete when he is alone. But then, it feels like God is making you be alone for a time. I got over this hump by consecrating myself to Christ’s Mother. I joined the “Militia Immaculata” just so I could join my sufferings to her intentions. I made myself a “prayer warrior” of sorts…to give myself some purpose and to make the “alone-ness” not feel so alone. It wasn’t all smiles and happy sacrifice. I broke a rosary and a Holy Spirit necklace in a fit of rage once…yelling at God. But, I know God understood the pain; He knew it was just a fit, and that I would quickly repent of it and re-commit to the long journey He had planned for me; He knew I wasn’t going anywhere. And man, I tell you, it took 7 years. 7 years of misery and back and forth depression and happiness and “God’s Will be done” and “I hate this”. But when I look back at it, I would not change a thing. He really conformed me in those years. And I would never have met my wife had I not gone through that. “Blessings in disguise” as they say. 😉
 
I am actually the youngest and I do tend to read peoples emotions often… I was surprised that I’m not the only one that struggles with this weak side. I greatly appreciate your advice ahs, and I will try to become that prayer warrior in order to fight my lonely feelings. I’m just glad to know that I’m not alone in this struggle and fight, once again thanks!🙂
 
Hello everyone, it has been a while since I posted something. I want to let you guys know that I have been experiencing my first semester in college all this time. I really enjoyed it and I even made new friends. I also think I improved my social skills. I know this is all good news so far, but I have another concern. In one of my classes I recently became quite attracted to a girl and I even talked to her a couple of times. It was pretty much small talk though. My concern is that I would like to develop a more meaningful connection with her but I notice she always talks to her friend and as a result I get nervous about talking with her during the only class I have with her. (By the way there is only one class left!) She is a really kind and nice person, and I still want to pursue her. Again, I don’t mean to waste anyone’s time, but what would you guys recommend me do?
 
Is it ever acceptable to advise a young male having lust issues to relieve himself through use of pornohraphy/masturbation? He has to apply himself to his studies and built up lust is a major distraction.
 
I know this won’t sound right at all.

Observing sailing dinghies I understood that tacking is a method for going where you’re going by not going where you’re going.

In addition to other suggestions, don’t forget to cultivate hobbies, maybe ones you were unnecessarily discouraged from in the past.

That I had and have intellectual hobbies helped me when a student as well as since then. Even when I read up extra-curricular subjects instead of revising.

I remember those intense “attachments” too. Those ladies are young too and need their own space and time. The best strategy is mix in groups of four or more, where an activity is a bigger focus than the other individuals. That way she will not have to cope with being targetted, which is far too in-her-face. Mix and mingle with several dozen ladies over a longish period in this way. Appreciate different things about different ones. Appreciate them for their interests. They and you have (I hope) many many years ahead. There is no such thing as “the only one for me”.

I think the most important thing is to develop a sense of the purpose of the Church and help others deepen their belief in Holy Scriptures. One’s relationships will fall into place all the better then, like a fitting garment, and one will worry less about them and about one’s sins (which one might not get round to committing).

Make sure you also mix with people who are in an ongoing dynamic relationship with Jesus. Do you have joint Bible studies and free-style intercession meetings?

When alone, and inarticulate in front of all prayer needs I’ve heard about, I string together lots of Glory Be’s while visualising (vaguely) who they are for. I can do that while I’m doing all kinds of other things at the same time including intellectual things, and travelling to and fro.
 
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