I havent been to Confession in 15 years! :eek:

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BornAgain2010

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I havent been to Confession since I was in CCD and made my First Reconcilliation. I was maybe 7 or 8 years old at the time. Our Pastor was a Monsignor at the time, so to an 8 year old that can be intimidating. Afterword, I asked my Mom if I had to go again the next time. She said that it was required, but that I didnt have to go if I didnt want to. So of course I simply thought, ‘cool, Im the off the hook’.

Fairly recently I found out that it was required to go at least once a year. It wasnt until now that I realized how much a diservice my parents did me. I plan to go to Confession this Wed. I am a little nervous, but I need to go. Theres just one thing bothering me.

The penance. Since I havent been in about 15 years, I have alot to answer for. Not that Im that sinful mind you, but stuff adds up over time. So afterword, and when the Priest assigns me penance, it isnt going to be anything drastic is it? I know in Scripture it says portionate to one’s sins, but the Priest isnt going to say “1,000 Hail Mary’s”, or “700 Glory Be’s” or anything like that will he? I could see maybe 20 Hail Mary’s. But it isnt going to be anything that much, right?
 
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BornAgain2010:
Dude, welcome to the club. 😉

My first confession in 1971 was so terrifying that I didn’t go back for 37 years. I made my 37 year confession three years ago. I had to confess some serious stuff - I’ll just leave it there. Pennance was 100 sit-ups on the altar before Mass. No, just kidding. It was 25 Hail Mary’s in front of the Blessed Sacrament. At that point, I would have said 10,000 rosaries if that is what the priest had told me to do.

Don’t worry about it. Just go. My confession was life changing. Don’t the knights encourage confession and such amongst the brethren?

-Tim-
 
The priest doesn’t add on lots of penance in proportion to the sin, but be glad to do the penance he sets you, and to do more, because God is good and loving and His forgiveness for our sins is a great mercy.
If you don’t welcome the penance now, it will be a lot heavier and harder to do penance for sin in Purgatory.
Its wonderful that you are going to Confession now. May God guide and bless you.
You will feel so free and full of joy, and you’ll be happy to accept the penance.
 
The Priest won’t assign that much penance :nope: But go to confession as soon as you can!!! :sad_yes: Go! Go! Go!
 
Think about the first breath of spring, the moment when you go outside, realize everything is newly blossoming, promise is in the air, purity is everywhere, and life is open wide. That’s the feeling of coming out of confession. You are as pure as can be. It doesn’t get any better.

So you haven’t been for a long time. Go. Get close to God.
 
For What its worth: I was raised in an observant family and was educated through 9th grade in a Jesuit run parochial school. From the time of age 7 until I left home,at age 15 I went to Confession and received Communion weekly. Yes, in the days of the Latin litergy we never received Communion without Confession first…and weekly was the norm, especially for children…
Anyway, in the ensuing years, I fell away from the church, and did not go to Confession or receive Communion for almost 50 years, although I always listed my religion as Roman Catholic for Military and Vetrans Admin records. Anyway, I had a severe bronchial attack one evening and ended up in a VA Hospital emergency room. After they diagnosed my problem, they sent me up to a hospital room about 7 AM. Waiting for me there was the Catholic Chaplain who asked me if I would like to receive Holy Communion. I said yes and he prepared to give me a general absolution. I told him I was uncomfortable with that and could he hear my confession. He said of course, and somehow I remembered the ritual from my childhood. Instead of waiting for me to start confessing my sins, he went through the 10 commandments with me, and then the Precepts of the Church. After quizzing me thoroughly, I was given absolution and I received. He then anointed me. Up to that moment I had no idea as to how serious my condition was. After receiving, I felt as if a huge burden of worldly cares had been lifted from me, and started recovering at once.
I know that I had been given a gift from God through the 9 first Fridays as a child, and I have been observant ever since.
I would suggest before you go to confession tomorrow, that you enter “Examination of Conscience” on your favorate search engine. There are several excellent sites on this subject. Then, when you are with the priest you tell him your situation and ask him to give you a general confession.
 
I went back after an absence of 8 or so years. There were serious things involved. I don’t even remember what my penance was, so it couldn’t have been too bad. What I do remember was the feeling of just floating out of the confessional. I, too, would have done whatever the priest would have asked for Penance…

Just GO!
 
Have you ever been hiking for miles with a heavy backpack and then, after several hours, remove the pack and sit down to rest? You feel like you weigh about twenty pounds. That is what a good confession is like.

Go back and keep going. Once a month is a good interval, because confessing those small, habitual sins regularly is the best was to receive the graces needed to break those habits. Don’t worry about what the priest might think. Most of them will be very happy that you came.
 
BornAgain2010 said:
I havent been to Confession since I was in CCD and made my First Reconcilliation. I was maybe 7 or 8 years old at the time. Our Pastor was a Monsignor at the time, so to an 8 year old that can be intimidating. Afterword, I asked my Mom if I had to go again the next time. She said that it was required, but that I didnt have to go if I didnt want to. So of course I simply thought, ‘cool, Im the off the hook’.

Fairly recently I found out that it was required to go at least once a year. It wasnt until now that I realized how much a diservice my parents did me. I plan to go to Confession this Wed. I am a little nervous, but I need to go. Theres just one thing bothering me.

The penance. Since I havent been in about 15 years, I have alot to answer for. Not that Im that sinful mind you, but stuff adds up over time. So afterword, and when the Priest assigns me penance, it isnt going to be anything drastic is it?
Shame on your mother. She must be aware that weekly church is requuired!!!

The longer you have been away from the sacrament, you would be surprised how the gentle the priest is and will give you o ne Our Father or a reading from Scripture

JESUS I TRUST IN YOU

jr
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First of all, welcome back home.

I am sure priests have heard all different time frames for Confessions. I used to go only 2 times a year, and mainly to communal only services, and rarely did the individual confessions.

I’ve repented my ways, and had a private confession. I make it a point to try to go more than 1 or 2 times a year required. Not that I am necessarily a bad person overall to go 4 to 6 times in a year either. Some people feel more comfortable with weekly confession, others monthly, others 1 or 2 times in a year. To each what their needs are. If unsure, ask your confessor for advice.

Each priest has given a different type of penance ranging from a set of prayers to saying a rosary for my penance - I’ve been a life long Catholic. I am sure that your confessor will give you something appropriate for your situation.
 

Don’t stress my love, I didn’t go to confession since I was eight years old when I received communion, I used to always just ask Jesus to forgive me, so did my own parents because they simply did not know about the teachings of the Church, and that is their own fault for not attending Mass every Sunday as they should.​

Anyway, it wasn’t until I was seventeen years old that I went to confession, and so I said to the Priest “my last confession was nine years ago”.​

My older brother I also convinced to go to confession, his was TEN YEARS, and so, do not stress, now that you know the teachings of the Church, strive to go to confession once a month for venial sins and as soon as possible for mortal sins.​

The Church teaches at least once a year, but trust me, make confession a once a month kind of thing, the graces you receive in confession are truly beautiful, and you will be able to resist sin much more if you go.
 
I am the Queen of Anxiety: listen to me well.

What you’re worrying about might happen in Confession . . . won’t happen.

It will be a good experience, and you will be glad that you went.

And I haven’t had a priest give me a grocery list for penance in a very long time.

I can’t help think about the Grace and Peace you’re going to be feeling this time tomorrow.😉
 
I went after a 12 year lapse or so.

I was terrified, I had broken all the commandments and was sure that I was going to be formally excommunicated or that I was going to shock the priest into a heart attack or he’d make me go to the police or something.

It was none of that.
It did take me a few years to work up the nerve, but I was glad that I did.

I try to go at least once a month now.

My Penance was far briefer than I thought it should be. Heck, I’ve been given rosaries by one priest just for Missing Mass once.

The feeling of relief you get when you’re forgiven is incomparable to anything else.
 
I recently went to confession for the first time and as I accused myself of each sin, I waited to hear an inhaled breath, or a grunt or a sigh of disapproval. The priest was very gentle and my penance was to say an Our Father.

It was a truly liberating experience.
 
A few years ago, I went to confession for the first time in more than 30-years. :eek:

I chose to call and make an appointment, figuring that I didn’t want to hog the confessional and cause a long line behind me. I mean, 30-years of sin had to be confessed! :rolleyes: Just kidding. I did have a face-to-face confession, but I chose that because I had not confessed in so long and I wanted help and prompting from the priest. It turned out to be more like a conversation than me just listing my sins and waiting for absolution and my pennance assignment. 😉

Talk about sweating bullets. I had to admit what I could remember from 30-years of sin. My priest was cool, calm, and compassionate, and I felt absolutely wonderful afterwards.
 
Seconding what others have said, you most likely won’t be required to do a crazy, overwhelming Penance. I guess it’s technically up to the Priest, but most Priests I’ve spoken to don’t want to scare people away from the Sacrament – especially those who have already been away from it too long!

In my case, I am a convert from non-Catholic Christianity, and I similarly had a lot to confess when I received the Sacrament of Reconciliation for the first time. In fact, it was about 15 years for me too (from Baptism to my first Confession). My assigned Penance that first time was a bit more than what I’ve usually been assigned since, but it still wasn’t overwhelming. I kind of felt like my confessor let me off too lightly for my long list of sins ;).

Please don’t be fearful. Get to the Sacrament as soon as you can! It is truly a wonderful gift, as frightening is it can be. I never feel better than I do when I walk out of the confessional with my soul washed clean and my sins forgiven.

You also might consider frequenting the Sacrament, even when you aren’t aware of any mortal sins. I try to go at least every two or three weeks, even if I’m not aware of needing it. The grace we receive from the Sacrament helps to keep me strong against sin and temptation.

God bless you!
 
BornAgain2010 said:
I havent been to Confession since I was in CCD and made my First Reconcilliation. I was maybe 7 or 8 years old at the time. Our Pastor was a Monsignor at the time, so to an 8 year old that can be intimidating. Afterword, I asked my Mom if I had to go again the next time. She said that it was required, but that I didnt have to go if I didnt want to. So of course I simply thought, ‘cool, Im the off the hook’.

Fairly recently I found out that it was required to go at least once a year. It wasnt until now that I realized how much a diservice my parents did me. I plan to go to Confession this Wed. I am a little nervous, but I need to go. Theres just one thing bothering me.

The penance. Since I havent been in about 15 years, I have alot to answer for. Not that Im that sinful mind you, but stuff adds up over time. So afterword, and when the Priest assigns me penance, it isnt going to be anything drastic is it? I know in Scripture it says portionate to one’s sins, but the Priest isnt going to say “1,000 Hail Mary’s”, or “700 Glory Be’s” or anything like that will he? I could see maybe 20 Hail Mary’s. But it isnt going to be anything that much, right?
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So we get one thing correct. It is NOT a requirement to confess once a year. It is a requirement that we receive Communion once a year. We are only required to confess any mortal sins.
The Church of course encourages everyone to confess regularly even if no mortal sins have been committed but it is not a requirement, albeit a good habit to have.
I’m guessing that, though, that in 15 years you have probably committed some mortal sins.
Don’t be nervous. There is nothing you can tell the priest that he has not heard before
and I have never heard of any drastic penance. It will likely be a few prayers you have to say.
Just to put your situation in perspective I was a Methodist before converting and I was 44 years old so 44 years of sins to confess. Nervous when I started my confession but after absolution I felt like the weight of the world had been lifted from me.
 
What! You should feel honored to say 1,000 Hail Mary’s. ;D
I’m joking. Go to confession and I promise you’ll feel wonderful afterwards.
God bless you!!
 
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