I need help defending Church teaching regarding contraception!

  • Thread starter Thread starter Tradycja
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
T

Tradycja

Guest
A heated discussion came up in my family regarding the Church teaching against contraception. I usually try to avoid these discussions because they usually go nowhere but today it was unavoidable and I was put on the spot. I had to take a stand.

The main thing I have a hard time answering is the more pragmatic argument “Well if no one used contraception then there would be kids all over the place! Who would pay for all those kids?” or “What about so and so they are devout Catholics and they only have 2 kids…”

I know about the theological arguments for the Church’s teaching. What I am looking for is practical arguments here.

How does one answer these pragmatic arguments against the Church’s teaching? Any ideas? I am not dealing with the most intellectual people in this argument, to put it bluntly. Any ideas from any of you married people on here?
 
"Well if no one used contraception then there would be kids all over the place! "
****And that’s a bad thing? ****

Who would pay for all those kids?"
The parents.

or “What about so and so they are devout Catholics and they only have 2 kids…”
We really shouldn’t be in the business of judging others on how many children they have or don’t have.
 
H_Opey said:
or “What about so and so they are devout Catholics and they only have 2 kids…”
We really shouldn’t be in the business of judging others on how many children they have or don’t have.
Click to expand...
Well said. For all we know, maybe they choose not to be intimate. Maybe they just haven’t had luck in conception. Huge amount of reasons. None of them effect how “devout” they are.
 
Tradycja said:
A heated discussion came up in my family regarding the Church teaching against contraception. I usually try to avoid these discussions because they usually go nowhere but today it was unavoidable and I was put on the spot. I had to take a stand.

The main thing I have a hard time answering is the more pragmatic argument “Well if no one used contraception then there would be kids all over the place! Who would pay for all those kids?” or “What about so and so they are devout Catholics and they only have 2 kids…”

I know about the theological arguments for the Church’s teaching. What I am looking for is practical arguments here.

How does one answer these pragmatic arguments against the Church’s teaching? Any ideas? I am not dealing with the most intellectual people in this argument, to put it bluntly. Any ideas from any of you married people on here?
Click to expand...
Sadly, that kind of mentality is quite rampant. You say they are not intellectual, but if there is a more down to earth explanation of the Encyclical “Humanae Vitae” that would help. Also, Christopher West’s book on “Theology of the Body” may help.

What it really all boils down to is trust. Trust in the Lord to provide you with the graces one needs to parent and be a good spouse. Also, trust in the Lord to provide you with the material things you need. It won’t be easy, but it also won’t be easy if you have just one child and want to do a good job. We are here on this earth to work out our salvation and to serve one another.

I feel so blessed having had eight children and now reaping the rewards of enjoying and sharing my faith with my grandchildren. My grandmother was the example for me…she had seven children and raised them in a 2 1/2 room apartment, and they had no frills but a happy life. There were no divorces among my aunts and uncles.
 
Pope JPII’s theology of the body is a very good basis to work with. What your relatives are saying is true from their point of view which is the great weakness of the pro-life movement. People need to control themselve and feelings, used to be called self discipline. There is a reason for marriage and it is not just a sexual relationship. My wife and I had a physical problem in that my wife was like a rabbit and ovulated on intercourse. Our first four children are 11monthe apart. The doctor finally figured it out and I did not pay for #3 & #4. He also got us a diapensation to use birth control pills. Then we moved from this diocese and were not allowed to use the pills and so we had 3more children and 5 miscarriages. Abstainance during the fertile period works if people are normal. I’ve known my couples that have limited the pouplation of the world in that manner and it is the recommended method. Our case was an exception, very rare .
 
I would be interested to know just how rare ovulating on intercourse is, as my neighbour had the same condition.

She had six children, one every year for six years, despite keeping charts to see when she was fertile, and faithfully abstaining until she was ‘safe’. She conceived the children when the NFP tutors said it shouldn’t be possible,and referred her to a doctor, who told her that she must be ovulating twice a month, once normally, and again when she had intercourse/ got pregnant. The doctor told her that NFP wasn’t going to work for her.

I’d like to know the figures. It might explain the ‘failures’ people talk of.
 
Most people are going to argue with you because the secular mentality believes children are something that should only be had when the couple feels it is convenient. Society also dislikes large families and sacrificing material comfort to have one. That’s just a fact, so if you’re pro-life and pro-family you are going to have to accept that you will be unable to reconcile your position with modern culture.

Even within the Catholic Church there is division when it comes to NFP. Some couples believe that it can be used whenever and others (like myself) believe - as the Church has told us - that it is to be only used for grave reasons. Again, some Catholics must adopt a viewpoint that fellow Catholics will disagree with.

However, if we are to truly let God be in control of all aspects of our lives we must reject our own selfish desires, even in terms of NFP in some cases.
 
Strictly speaking there are not a lot of good arguments against Contraception that can be argued to someone who does not believe in God.

Basically the best argument there is that biologically speaking, sex is for babies. The pleasure derived from sex is to entice people to have babies. If sex were painful, it wouldn’t be done, and the species wouldn’t continue. To someone who believes in a godless world, the best argument is to try and point out that the only purpose of sex is babies, everything else is incentives to get us to make babies. However, it is fairly easy for them to argue back that babies aren’t made every time anyways, so whats the harm of contracepting some times.

If argued to someone who does believe in God, you could bring up things like “be fruitful and multiply” You could take the idea that sex is for babies to its then logical conclusion that God designed sex with its purpose being babies, and to do otherwise is to go against the nature God established for that act.
 
This reminds of last week’s guest on “The Journey Home”, Fr. Donald Calloway. He was asked on this topic, and he said that Jesus did not put obstacles between Himself and His Bride, but gave everything in love. I was so struck by this that I have been thinking about it ever since. Here is a model for marriage. Contraceptives are obstacles between the spouses, but Our Lord did not do so. Well, Fr. Calloway put it much better than me, so I’d recommend checking it out. It’s the 3-22-10 show, available at the EWTN web site:
ewtn.com/vondemand/audio/seriessearchprog.asp?pgnu=1&SeriesID=-6892289

🙂
 
Check out Contraception: Why Not? by Dr. Janet Smith.
  1. As to the “we’d be overrun with children!” claim… well, no. If everyone followed Catholic teaching regarding sexual issues, all babies would be born in wedlock. Since the current statistics have about 50% of babies born out of wedlock, that’d cut the birth rate in half right there.
  2. Catholics with only two kids… unless your family are privy their medical records, they have no way of knowing if the couple in question has suffered infertility or multiple miscarriages. Perhaps they wanted 6 but feel lucky to have the 2 that they have. Perhaps the woman suffered severe complications after the 2nd was born and had a hysterectomy. Perhaps the man had cancer after #2, rendering him infertile. You just don’t know everyone’s situation and shouldn’t make assumptions. Perhaps they have a serious, just reason to avoid conceiving further children and are using NFP to that end.
If it’s known for a fact that they’re contracepting, well, I’ve yet to meet a Christian that’s perfect, or see a denomination in which 100% of members follow all its precepts perfectly 100% of the time. 🤷 We’re sinners; that’s why Jesus died for us. Catholics who contracept need our prayers for a change of their hearts and minds.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top