I need help, my faith is wavering

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Silver_bear

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I’m so frightened, I made this account for this only so I’m sorry if I’m not up to date on how to effectively use this.

I am a 15 year old male, and I have recently, over the past few week, questioned my belief. I’m not going to lie I’ve cried and prayed to god but I feel a pit in my chest. I believe but I’m scared. Maybe I’m just having a skepticism moment, but it feels more like an existential crisis. I’m scared of a lack of an afterlife and I feel like my life is flying by too fast. In the past I’ve never wavered in faith, but the idea of our mind making event seem true in fits of delusion sense has broken me. I love my god and my church family, but I’m so scared. Help me please. Why do you as people of faith believe? I’ve only gotten answers of “you need to have hope”, but it seems like an answer embedded into everyone’s head that I talk too. I’m filled with fear and I feel ashamed to have to come here to bother others to ask for help, but I’m afraid that my priest is just going to give me the same “hope answer” that everyone else gives me. I know I’ve been repetitive through this entire post but forgive me, I’m currently crying, so sorry for any mistakes. I love you all and may peace be with you.
 
We all struggle with our faith. Anyone who says that he/she doesn’t is not talking a good look in the mirror. “I believe, help me with my unbelief,” can’t remember where in the gospel this is.

Last Sunday, for many Eastern Catholics and Orthodox was the Sunday of Saint Thomas. My priest, during his homily, spoke about how we so often see Thomas’ doubt in the story, but he spoke of Thomas as “coming back Thomas.” We do not know what Thomas did during the 8 days after the Resurrection, but he came back, for what ever reason, he came back. The fact that you took the time to post about your faith shows something. It shows that there is a part of you that, and you may not have figured it out yet, is “coming back.”

ZP
 
Life After Death

Pray everyday for an increase of Faith - even just a simple “Lord I believe, help my unbelief, increase my faith, O Lord!”
 
Don’t panic. Also don’t be in such a hurry. Your life might seem like it’s flying past, but you have time, and it takes time to build faith. It’s a journey to holiness and to God, and you get there one step at a time.

Could you tell us a little more about your faith and Christian living? Do you go to Mass? Have you been to Confession? In your family, who sets a good example for you? Are there things in your life that weaken your faith?

Welcome to Catholic Answers Forums!
 
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I don’t really have god in my mind during daily life and ever since my mom was diagnosed with cancer I haven’t been able to go to church, so maybe a year without going to a house of god besides maybe 4 or 5 times. I can’t legally drive myself and my dad has to work on Sunday. I’ve been to confession twice in my life and the only thing that weekends my faith is my own existential thinking. I’ve since calmed down and still have a small hold on faith but it still feels weak.
 
I believe because I have witnessed the pure love of God. I have the pleasure and burden of experiencing His love which is far beyond human comprehension. This experience has never left me and I have only found traces of it in the confessional. God is absolutely real and His will for us is love.

Equipped with this I have studied and found an abundance of human evidence for His existence. I could walk you through months if not years of human reasoning to convince you but it is a long road.

Either way the Lord is truly the King of kings truly our salvation and utterly our true love.

God Bless you!
 
“Fear is useless. What is needed is Trust.” Jesus
Don’t worry! You will be fine. Tell God you need help and put everything in His hands. God is with you right now, loving you and hearing you. Don’t be afraid of Him; there is nothing to fear. Mother Mary will help you as well.
 
I’m sorry your having such a hard time. My faith had wavered many times and still does quite often. I like to pray the prayer “Jesus I trust in you”, I also pray to Our Lady. I used to feel so alone and sad, I just wished I could tell my mother about how I felt but I couldn’t. Eventually, I realized every time I was sad,lonely,in pain,sick,or scared, Our Lady was always there for me, constantly praying for me and loving me. I would go to confession and tell your priest what’s bothering you and you need to tell him you want advice. God bless you and I am praying for you!
 
It’s nice to have strong feelings of attachment to faith and to God, but another important aspect of faith is choosing to believe what God says about himself, and choosing to believe what he says about how He feels about you. Like, “I have loved you with an everlasting love”. Like, “I will never forget you, I have carved you in the palm of my hand.” Like, “I will never leave you or forsake you.” Like, “I go ahead to prepare a place for you”. I heard one preacher put it this way - “Am I going to believe what I see, or am I going to believe what God says?”. I can’t see God and I haven’t been to heaven. But I believe because I’ve seen what He has done. Take comfort in this too - he promises to be found by those who seek him with their whole heart.
 
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I would like to try to really relate to you and share that I’ve gone through something similar to what you have described. I have wrestled with so many doubts, and not the regular ones either, some very very deep and confusing doubts. Try to frequently receive the Eucharist and say “Lord I do believe help my unbelief” talk to trusted friends about it. Talk to a very wise and intelligent priest. Do not keep these struggles to yourself. Get involved in your parish even more.
Lastly I’d recommend reading Orthodoxy and The Everlasting Man. Both by GK Chesterton. Listen to peter kreeft and Bishop Barron talks as well.
Praying for you
 
Silver_bear said:
I don’t really have god in my mind during daily life
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Most of us also concentrate on whatever we are doing throughout the day - concentrating on the job/task/chore at hand as we do it. We have to focus and think about what we are doing. But our minds also wander onto other things and then there are also times when we are preoccupied with worry - in your case your mothers’ health perhaps. But it only takes a few seconds to think “Help me Lord”, “I love you God” etc. These are all ways of lifting your heart and mind to God. These are occasions of bringing God into your everday. Or just literally talk to God as though he is there with you - which he is. As an example, if you’re watching a show on TV and something funny happens - share that with God - think of Him and mentally say “Gee that was funny Lord”, just as you would say “Gee that was funny” to whoever was watching the show with you.
Silver_bear said:
I haven’t been able to go to church
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Silver_bear said:
I can’t legally drive myself and my dad has to work on Sunday.
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Is there a Church close to you that you could walk to? Or maybe get public transport to if it is close by? Is it possible your dad could drive you to Church if there is a Saturday night vigil Mass close to you? Most places also hold confession before that Mass too, so perhaps if you could find out, go to confession and tell the priest what you’ve said about how long since you’ve been, and the few times you’ve been to Mass. Also tell him briefly why that has been.

Don’t despair and don’t feel discouraged. God does know what it is you are going through. Ask him to help you with these problems and to lift you up so you are not feeling so discouraged. Also keep asking God to increase your Faith and Hope in Him.
 
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The only church near me is a 20 min car ride. I’m going to try and find someone to take me, thank you so much for everything. I’m still weak in faith but I still believe and I hope that eventually I’ll be as strong as I used to be.
 
Ask our Blessed Mother to intercede for you. And make acts of trust in our Lord Jesus Christ’s merciful love for you.

This will help much! I will pray for you also.
 
Silver_bear said:
I’m so frightened, I made this account for this only so I’m sorry if I’m not up to date on how to effectively use this.

I am a 15 year old male, and I have recently, over the past few week, questioned my belief. I’m not going to lie I’ve cried and prayed to god but I feel a pit in my chest. I believe but I’m scared. Maybe I’m just having a skepticism moment, but it feels more like an existential crisis. I’m scared of a lack of an afterlife and I feel like my life is flying by too fast. In the past I’ve never wavered in faith, but the idea of our mind making event seem true in fits of delusion sense has broken me. I love my god and my church family, but I’m so scared. Help me please. [I had to shorten this quote]
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When I was a senior in high school, I had a priest for a classroom instructor. I asked him the same question you have, why did he believe?

I did not like his answer, that he didn’t know. Here, he was raised in a Catholic family, went to the seminary in Europe, and had a master’s degree in something or other, standing there, telling me he didn’t know.

First, it’s fairly common, I think, to ask such a question when one is growing up. Like you say, you see yourself growing up, but growing up for what? to what? etc.

Do you know what that does or should do? It should lead you to search and answer those questions. I have found the Catholic faith to be credible and consistent, the Bible makes sense and tells us something important and beautiful. Christianity teaches us how BEST to get along with people (not that they will act the same towards us).

Jesus said that he is the way, the truth, and the life. I believe that. I see good and evil in the world, and my faith helps me to choose the good. I see the effects of people who choose the evil way.

I don’t know if this “works” for you. When I was 15, I realized some things like you are – life is moving on. My father had died due to cancer, and I had a lot of things to think about, without a father to give me advice.

My suggestion: Think about what is right. Do what is right. Believe what is right. The MORE you do these, the less you will have to regret and to have to explain to anybody. Wouldn’t that be great, to not have to apologize to anybody for doing something bad. It’s like ( and a lot more than that) like taking care of your teeth so that you don’t have pain and expensive bills for fixing them.

Do not be overly influenced by what your friends say, if it doesn’t sound like what I’m saying here. You have to be yourself. You have to get along with people, if you want to succeed. At your best, put your eyes on the goal of holiness and happiness in your life.
 
Silver_bear said:
I don’t really have god in my mind during daily life and ever since my mom was diagnosed with cancer I haven’t been able to go to church, so maybe a year without going to a house of god besides maybe 4 or 5 times. I can’t legally drive myself and my dad has to work on Sunday. I’ve been to confession twice in my life and the only thing that weekends my faith is my own existential thinking. I’ve since calmed down and still have a small hold on faith but it still feels weak.
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Your mother has a serious illness, which is likely scary on some level and causes you stress.

You can’t get to church and have not been practicing your faith, partly for reasons beyond your control.

This is the type of scenario that leads to exactly the sort of crisis you describe.

Praying daily (even if it’s a “Lord, Help my Unbelief” type of prayer) and actually engaging in Catholic practice, such as going to confession and Mass, help with these types of situations because you receive grace from the sacraments.

Try to find a way to get to church on Sunday. Perhaps Uber?

Also try to find a way to get to confession more often. At least a couple times a year.

In the meantime, pray every day. You can do that from wherever you are, and don’t need transportation. Read Scripture (the Bible is online at Vatican website for free), say whatever prayers you are comfortable with (the Rosary if you are comfortable with that, ask Mother Mary to help you; or the Divine Mercy chaplet - you can say either one on your fingers using a web guide if you don’t have beads to use). You can also talk to the Lord in your own words, but it would be good to say some formal prayers as well.

Ask God to help you get through this difficult time in your life and to give you more faith, hope and charity to persevere and grow closer to him, and to keep you from despair.

Ask Mother Mary, St. Joseph and any other saints you like to pray for you.

God bless
 
I’m sorry you are going through a hard time. Ive gyobe through similar things. It is normal to have doubts sometimes. So is your main fear/doubt that there is no afterlife? It do you have doubts and questions about other aspects of the Faith? It seems like your main fear is death and nothing after death. Why are you thinking all a sudden about death? Also the fact that it is hurting you so much to have these doubts. There may be something deeper. Maybe some psychological issues that need to be resolved. Maybe some questions about the Faith that need to be answered. I’m sure your priest would give you more than just hope if you explained your fears and doubts and especially if you told him you can’t just have hope.
 
That may be a cause of your feelings. You are going through a hard time and you desperately want someone to turn to who you can trust. It makes the most sense to turn to God, but you are not practicing your faith regularly because of your situation. I know going to Mass and Confession is hard due to your age. Maybe if you can’t go on Sunday you can try to make it some day during the week or Saturday evening. Also try to go to confession. I’m sure your parents would take you if you asked and it worked with their schedule. You can even bring up the fears you have and it will probably be a big relief to go to confession and it will make it easier to feel God’s presence. I have gone through tough times in high school and spending more time in prayer and doing spiritual reading was very helpful. I could feel God’s love and his presence and it made the suffering so much more bearable. Try to pray. Cry to God. Tell him everything. Tell him you need him, you need his love… Read. There are lots of good spiritual books and articles and homilies online that might help. Fr. Mike Schmitz makes videos for young people especially. Also this prayer might help…I Thirst for You - A Prayer based on words by Our Lord Jesus Christ to Blessed Mother Teresa of Calcutta.
 
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