I need some advice on my sister - so frustrated

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I might also suggest St. Benedict’s Medal and prayers.

http://www.osb.org/gen/graphics/medgobv.gif

The Medal or Cross of Saint Benedict

On the front side of the medal is the image of St. Benedict. In his right hand he holds a cross, and in his left, his Rule. On each side are pedestals recalling incidents from Gregory’s life of Benedict in which Benedict was saved from poisoning. On a pedestal to the right is the cup of poisoned wine which shattered when he blessed it. On the pedestal to the left is the raven about to carry away a loaf of poisoned bread. Above the cup and the raven are the Latin words: Crux S. Patris Benedicti (The cross of our Holy Father Benedict). Encircling the image of St. Benedict are the words: “Eius in obitu nostro praesentia muniamur!” (“May we be strengthened by his presence in the hour of our death!”). Benedict said one should keep death daily before one’s eyes. He died in a chapel at Montecassino with his arms raised to heaven, supported by his monks, shortly after he had received communion. In small letters under Benedict’s feet is an inscription which reads in Latin “From Montecassino, 1880.”

On the back of the medal there is a cross. On the arms of the cross are the first letters of a poetic Latin prayer: “Crux sacra sit mihi lux! Nunquam draco sit mihi dux!” (“May the holy Cross be my light. May the dragon [devil] never be my guide!”). The letters C S P B in the angles of the cross stand for “Crux Sancti Patris Benedicti” (“The cross of our holy father Benedict”). Above the cross is the word “Pax” (“peace”) which is an ancient Benedictine motto. **Around the edges of the back of the medal the letters V R S N S M V—S M Q L I V B are the initials letters of a Latin prayer of exorcism: “Vade retro satana! Nunquam suade mihi vana! Sunt mala quae libas. Ipse venena bibas!” (“Get back, Satan! Tempt me not with your vanities! The things you offer me are evil. Drink the poison yourself!”). **

Use of the Medal
The medal can be worn around he neck, or attached to a rosary, or kept some place. One custom is to put a St. Benedict medal in the foundations of buildings. In all cases, the purpose is to ask for God’s blessing and protection through the intercession of St. Benedict.

As the inscriptions indicate, the medal is many things: a prayer of exorcism, a prayer for strength, a prayer for a peaceful death, a prayer for peace, a prayer that the Cross of Christ and the gospel will be our light and guide. The medal is a reminder that we need to take up our cross daily and “follow the true King, Christ our Lord,” and so “share with patience in the sufferings of Christ so that we may one day share in his heavenly kingdom.”
 
YinYangMom, what a wonderful idea! I’d forgotten about the green scapular. I think she would take that. :yup: You’ve made some good points, too…I think maybe some time in Adoration is a good idea. (I can’t remember the last time I went :o :o ) I really appreciate your insight in this matter…good food for thought. Our relationship is just so delicate that I’m afraid of upsetting her…but she does know that I disapprove of her actions. I think I’ll give the scapular a try and see how that goes, and if she persists in this stuff then take it further, somehow. It’s good motivation for confession - not only for the good of my soul, but to make my prayers stronger for my family and friends that may be in trouble. Gosh, the way our Lord works is wonderful.

Maggie, I’ll see if I can aquire a small St Benedict medal and attach it to the scapular. Thanks! 🙂
 
Just so you’re not confused about whether or not there are all “real psychics” out there, let me share what a priest friend told us once over dinner.

He explained that demons are all witnesses to our lives and that people who insist on gathering supernatural information do get it, however it’s rarely from God (such as true apparitions from loved ones in purgatory or heaven that are sent directly to us and NOT through a mediator)–but instead of really seeing our great aunt Mildred or long-deceased uncle Charlie, the “psychic” is seeing a demon taking shape of what they want to see and describe to the listener in such a way as to recognize. Because they witness our lives, they can throw out details like “the ring! ask her about the ring!” and then everyone oohs and ahhs as if this “proves” the validity of the psychic. All it proves is that the psychic is in touch with demons, whether or not they even realize what they’re playing with.

I would be afraid too. I would not want a demon floating next to my sister masquerading as my dead aunt and being seen by a spiritually dangerous person.
 
Ugh, this stuff is so horrible and creepy, isn’t it?

I went to adoration and the rosary this evening at my parish and offered it for my sister. It was nice to be there, I haven’t done that in a while.
 
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Celia:
Ugh, this stuff is so horrible and creepy, isn’t it?

I went to adoration and the rosary this evening at my parish and offered it for my sister. It was nice to be there, I haven’t done that in a while.
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I would pray over your sister as much as possible. I do this with my sisters all the time and they have no idea. They’ll be talking to me and I’ll be listening but meanwhile I’m saying repeated Hail Marys in another part of my brain, if that makes sense. Perhaps write something out that is simple and to the point and memorize it, or use the St. Michael prayer.

And yes, I agree this stuff is creepy! I’ve heard all sorts of stories from priest friends that have kept me up many-a-night! 🙂
 
I have a bit of a different approach to suggest. My own sister is of much the same temperament as your own, and is also a Catholic who does not live or espouse Catholicism. I love her dearly, but our relationship has been very…strained…over the years. The course I’ve taken is to not give a sweeping “All you do is wrong” type conversation (as it immediately makes her turn away–and what will she turn to? That which she knows and feels comfortable with and I am attacking.) I instead take interest in what she is saying and provide the Catholic worldview (without saying that it is Catholic). I have to watch myself to make sure and only discuss what she brings up and not what I so want to tell her. In your situation, the example would be:

Sis is talking about spirits. You say, “Oh, that reminds me! Have you seen that new movie The Exorcism of Emily Rose? You’d probably really like it!” Then you can discuss small aspects of it with her and hopefully open her eyes to a bigger picture. Perhaps a first step would be in working on the fact that evil spirits exist. Your tone and word choices would make a huge difference between her thinking that you are showing interest in her interests and her thinking that you are arrogant and condescending.

With my own sister, it is like walking a tight rope with no net. Say the wrong thing and she might not come back for another year. I have to always gauge how I am saying it. It is better to lose the battle but win the war I always tell myself.
 
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Forest-Pine:
I have a bit of a different approach to suggest. My own sister is of much the same temperament as your own, and is also a Catholic who does not live or espouse Catholicism. I love her dearly, but our relationship has been very…strained…over the years. The course I’ve taken is to not give a sweeping “All you do is wrong” type conversation (as it immediately makes her turn away–and what will she turn to? That which she knows and feels comfortable with and I am attacking.) I instead take interest in what she is saying and provide the Catholic worldview (without saying that it is Catholic). I have to watch myself to make sure and only discuss what she brings up and not what I so want to tell her. In your situation, the example would be:

Sis is talking about spirits. You say, “Oh, that reminds me! Have you seen that new movie The Exorcism of Emily Rose? You’d probably really like it!” Then you can discuss small aspects of it with her and hopefully open her eyes to a bigger picture. Perhaps a first step would be in working on the fact that evil spirits exist. Your tone and word choices would make a huge difference between her thinking that you are showing interest in her interests and her thinking that you are arrogant and condescending.

With my own sister, it is like walking a tight rope with no net. Say the wrong thing and she might not come back for another year. I have to always gauge how I am saying it. It is better to lose the battle but win the war I always tell myself.
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Thanks Forest pine, I will try to work that angle into our next convo. Yeah, your sis sounds like mine all right. She is very opinionated and I just do not understand her at all. I get along much, much better with my older brother, I feel like I can tell him anything. It makes me kind of sad but I doubt we will ever have that close, sisterly relationship others have. We had a big screaming blow-out not long ago. She wouldn’t talk to me for weeks and finally she just started talking to me out of the blue like nothing was wrong. I just went along with it because I didn’t want to rock the boat anymore and it stresses out my mom and dad when we are fighting, especially my dad, my mom tends to live on drama :rolleyes: but anyway…

And Abby, I’m going to have to use that tactic of saying prayers in the back of my mind when I’m having a troubling conversation with her. Maybe it will help me keep my cool. Thanks 🙂
 
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YinYangMom:
But St. Pio was blessed with charisms of the Holy Spirit. Those are addressed in scripture and in Church writings.

It’s different than what some of these psychics have. The catechism seems to distinguish between the charism gifts of the Spirit which are given to bring people closer to Christ and those which humans conjure up for their own purposes…
👍 exactly!! That’s what I was saying…
IPsychics and others believe they possess certain gifts. They then try to control their circumstances and that always leaves one vulnerable to Satan’s manipulations -and we all know that his best weapon is making things look good. …

The catechism makes it clear we possess nothing - all things come from God - so when things like that happen we need to turn to Him to find out what the purpose was.
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That’s exactly what I was saying too, they have recourse to demons, even if they aren’t aware of it.
 
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Celia:
Ugh, this stuff is so horrible and creepy, isn’t it?

I went to adoration and the rosary this evening at my parish and offered it for my sister. It was nice to be there, I haven’t done that in a while.
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I went to Adoration tonight too and prayed for all in their situation, when I prayed the Rosary I remembered everyone on the threads on these formuns, their loved ones, their intentions, etc…I know a lot of us here do that, and I thank you all, we need one another. Some don’t adore Him, and some haven’t in years, and so we all need to for one another. I love the way Blessed Mother Teresa said it one time, she said something like this–that whenever someone goes to Adoration that it spreads God’s goodness into the world, just as when someone does something bad, it spreads satan’s evil. So we all need to spread more of God’s goodness instead. I will continue to pray for your family and for all those in situations like this and for all the poster’s here, (have mercy on us and on the whole world.)
 
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allhers:
I went to Adoration tonight too and prayed for all in their situation, when I prayed the Rosary I remembered everyone on the threads on these formuns, their loved ones, their intentions, etc…I know a lot of us here do that, and I thank you all, we need one another. Some don’t adore Him, and some haven’t in years, and so we all need to for one another. I love the way Blessed Mother Teresa said it one time, she said something like this–that whenever someone goes to Adoration that it spreads God’s goodness into the world, just as when someone does something bad, it spreads satan’s evil. So we all need to spread more of God’s goodness instead. I will continue to pray for your family and for all those in situations like this and for all the poster’s here, (have mercy on us and on the whole world.)
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Thank you for that. It is most appreciated. And I agree completely. I find myself praying more today than I ever did, and it’s not about me. I pray because the world badly needs God’s grace.
 
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allhers:
I went to Adoration tonight too and prayed for all in their situation, when I prayed the Rosary I remembered everyone on the threads on these formuns, their loved ones, their intentions, etc…I know a lot of us here do that, and I thank you all, we need one another. Some don’t adore Him, and some haven’t in years, and so we all need to for one another. I love the way Blessed Mother Teresa said it one time, she said something like this–that whenever someone goes to Adoration that it spreads God’s goodness into the world, just as when someone does something bad, it spreads satan’s evil. So we all need to spread more of God’s goodness instead. I will continue to pray for your family and for all those in situations like this and for all the poster’s here, (have mercy on us and on the whole world.)
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What nice thoughts, allhers. Thank you 🙂
 
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allhers:
When they open their mouth to talk? 😃
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Ha ha ha!! So true! While intended as a joke, it has a whole lot of truth to it.

First, we are exhorted to not seek out mediums.
Second, people who were really seeing spirits and obeying God would not be broadcasting this fact from the TV rafters or doing it for profit.
Third, any person who is bringing publicity, fame, or wealth to himself by purporting to be a psychic is not doing the work of God.

So, if he opens his mouth and tells you he is psychic, you can be sure you want nothing to do with him.

What is Catholic teaching on spiritualists and mediums?
Was Padre Pio a psychic?
Do ghosts exist?
Why is astrology against the First Commandment?
What’s Your Sign?
Was my session with a psychic evil?
 
Celie:

My mother was a Psychic and an Astrologer. At one point, she became a member of the parish my father and I were attending so that she could get more customers. We had no idea that that’s why she was attending until I noticed that she was doing an aweful lot of “Readings” for members of the congregation.

When she died, we had to clean out all of her “Tools”. I tried to lie about some of them (I was young), but thank God my father saw through that and threw all of them out, even the stuff I lied about.

Since I’ve come back, God’s had me on a steady diet of cross in order to treat the afteraffects of being around all of that.I can tell you that it isn’t easy to get freed from those effects.

The occult is powerful in a demonic sort of way, and you need to avoid it. At the same time, you have to find a way to tell your sister and your mother that you love them, but that what they are doing is dangerous because of the forces they are messing around with.

I think that your sister might be “Failing to discern the body and blood of our Lord Jesus Christ” (I Cor 11:20-34) when she goes to these psychics, makes light of the Church’s objections to that and then goes up to receive the body and blood of our Lord during Mass.

The Catechism has several sections on the occult and why we need to avoid the area (there are also a bunch of books on the topic). The section on Divination and Magic - Paragraphs 2115-2117 can be found on pages 569-570 in the paperback version of the Catechism.

After a period of prayer (a Novena of Masses?) I would politely ask your sister to read the section from the Catechism and ask her if she understands that that is the teaching of the Church regarding what she and your mother have been doing. Remind her that you don’t have to participate in something that’s wrong in order to show your mother that you love her.

Show her the scripture passage I listed and remind her that the Church took and takes going to communion seriously, not to make us feel bad, but so that we’ll get the benefit from the Sacrament when we receive it.

Then suggest that she go to Confession and talk about her involvement in the occult with a priest.

I wouldn’t drop any hints here. Dropping hints will only get you angrier since your sister will pointedly ignore them. and, That is not what we want here. Your sister is endangering herself, and you have an obligation to try to figure out, in a loving way, without getting angry and upset at her, how to tell that to her and what she needs to do to save herself from the situation.

Say this in the meantime:

PRAYERS TO ST. MICHAEL

*Holy Michael Archangel, defend us in the day of battle. Be our safeguard against the wickedness and snares of the devil. May God rebuke him, we humbly pray; and do thou, O Prince of the Heavenly Host, by the power of God, trust down to into hell Satan and all wicked spirits who wander through world for the ruin of souls. Amen

O PRINCE Most Glorious, Michael the Archangel, Keep us in Remembrance; here and everywhere, entreat the Son of God for us.*

PRAYER TO THE GUARDIAN ANGEL

O HOLY Guardian Angel, To whose Care, God, in His mercy, has committed me, stand by me know and at my last hour; protect me against the powers of darkness; defend me from all my enemies and conduct my soul to the mansions of bliss.

**The Jesus Prayer - The Prayer of the Publican **

Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God.
Have mercy on me, a sinner.

I hope this helps. Please, let me know how this works out.

In Christ, Michael
 
Thank you, Michael. I appreciate your response very much and I will definetly take it into account when I decide to speak with her. I think she needs it. My mom is thinking about going with her to the city now 😦 you should have heard the jokes she was making about the Eucharist the other day :crying: (I don’t think she realizes she was being sacriligious)…I wish my Dad would back me up but he just makes grim faces and leaves the room. My mom laughed a little and then told her to stop when she saw the look on my face.

It just shocks me that someone that attended the same schools that I did and grew up the same way I did can have such completely different views of the church. And what’s right and wrong. She makes jokes, sees psychics and then still goes to church once a month or so and recieves communion and says all haughtily, “Well, I go to church, but I *work, *so I don’t have time to go every week like you do.” Um, when I was working I had to do back flips with my schedule to make the time to go to church but I always did. She could do it if she wanted to. But I keep my mouth shut because I don’t want to be judging her and make her mad and then I’ll never get anywhere. I’m just going in circles with my feelings about all this.

I’m sorry I’m getting off topic but it’s harder every time I see her to be civil. I just want to take her by the shoulders and shake her and say, “Do you not see what you are doing??” It’s so frustrating!!

Anyway, I’m going to go to the Catholic shop in my area and pick up a green scapular to drop off at her apartment next time I’m there. I need to really pray about how to approach her with all this that I’m feeling. 😦

p.s. thanks for listening to me vent again :rolleyes: sorry about that.
 
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