I really blew it

[Pace]

The movies of David Lynch were sent by God to heal us of this desire “just to see” or to “see something that was always hidden”.

Watch especially his Blue Velvet .

The films of Frederico Fellini have the same effect. God gave us a message about this by having Lynch’s birthday fall on the same day as Fellini’s. “There’s no such thing as a bad coincidence”.

 

[Scullinius]

Princess_Abby:

You might consider taping pictures of your husband and daughter and Jesus/Mary onto your actual computer monitor, too.

You might also consider using pictures of Mary or other saints as your desktop wallpaper. (I have St. Thomas Aquinas, Saint Faustina, and St. Jean Marie Vianney.) I also use a five-button optical mouse, and I have one of the buttons configured to minimize all windows… so anytime I want to ask St. Thomas for a clarification on a point of theology, there he is!

Scullinius

 

[rayne89]

Scullinius:

You might also consider using pictures of Mary or other saints as your desktop wallpaper. (I have St. Thomas Aquinas, Saint Faustina, and St. Jean Marie Vianney.) I also use a five-button optical mouse, and I have one of the buttons configured to minimize all windows… so anytime I want to ask St. Thomas for a clarification on a point of theology, there he is!

Scullinius

I actually have a “Madonna of the Streets” desk top wallpaper but I can’t see it when I’m online. Thanks for the great suggestion though. God Bless.

 

[Dr.Colossus]

rayne89,

When I was struggling with an addiction to pornography, one of the reasons I continued to fall was because I fell into the trap of believing that I wasn’t really forgiven until I went to confession. This led me to, subconsciously at least, have less problem looking at porn up to the point I went to confession. This was obviously a terrible way to abuse the Sacrament, and it unnecessarily fueled my addiction, but then Satan had one heck of a hold on me.

My point is, rejoice in the fact that you are already forgiven! Yes, you must still go to confession, but sincere repentance, and the intention to receive the Sacrament of Reconciliation as soon as possible, merit for us forgiveness immediately. Praise God for that and don’t let temptation threaten to take that away.

 

[Madaglan]

Hey rayne89:

Just wanted to say not to sweat it. It’s completely human that you sin, and it is very good that you feel some guilt for what you did. Guilt for doing sin is healthy; although to feel too guilty is not spiritually healthy.

I think that sometimes people look at porn because they need some exoticism in their lives, not necessarily because their body urges the soul to commit sexual sin. Religious images on your computer might help stop you from looking at pornographic images; however, I personally don’t believe that is the best answer. I believe the answer is to fulfill your curiosity and desire for exoticism in a Christian way.

How? Perhaps you can buy some incense or purchase some really energetic (charismatic) music. You can buy and then read some of the wild Christian stories about saints translocating across Europe or floating across rivers on their capes. If you don’t have the money, you can always listen to Seven Sorrow’s music, which rocks. Speaking of music, if you need something exotic, look into Eastern spirituality and listen to the Akathist and the Paraklesis hymns. You can also read books on the Christian martyrs, which really excite the spirit.

Anyhow, that’s just my own unique perspective. Whenever I feel tempted to sexually sin, I oftentimes blast my Songs 4 Worship CD, or I’ll run around the development and pretend that I’m a soldier fighting under Constantine’s Chi Rho banner at the battle of Milvian Bridge.

So, just go to the priest and tell him your sin. He’s probably heard tons worst (in fact I know this to be true). Do penance and perhaps seek a plenary indulgence (it will cancel out those 7 years of temporal punishment in Purgatory for each mortal sin).

Sorry if my posts seems a little silly to you. However, I am serious in what I recommend, even if what I recommend better suits someone of my wacky and not-so-solemn personality. Take whatever you see is good. Disregard what does not help you.

Best of luck in stopping sexual sin. I think everyone has problems with it, even priests and ministers. Bye! :yup:

 

[rayne89]

Madaglan:

Hey rayne89:

I think that sometimes people look at porn because they need some exoticism in their lives, not necessarily because their body urges the soul to commit sexual sin. Religious images on your computer might help stop you from looking at pornographic images; however, I personally don’t believe that is the best answer. I believe the answer is to fulfill your curiosity and desire for exoticism in a Christian way.

How? Perhaps you can buy some incense or purchase some really energetic (charismatic) music. You can buy and then read some of the wild Christian stories about saints translocating across Europe or floating across rivers on their capes. If you don’t have the money, you can always listen to Seven Sorrow’s music, which rocks. Speaking of music, if you need something exotic, look into Eastern spirituality and listen to the Akathist and the Paraklesis hymns. You can also read books on the Christian martyrs, which really excite the spirit.

Thanks so much your most unique suggestions. I’m glad you’ve found such wondeful ways to fulfill your desires. God Bless!

 

[rayne89]

To all of you who’ve been so kind with your encouragement and your prayers you really have been a great consolation to me. And for those who have shared your own struggles I thank you so very much for helping me not feel alone in my temptation.

My heart is still very grieved over this mess but I am very much looking forward to confession and starting over fresh. God bless you all.

 

[Sowndog]

rayne89:

My heart is still very grieved over this mess but I am very much looking forward to confession and starting over fresh. God bless you all.

From my experience one of the worst results of such sin is its effect on your heart and your spirit. I am haunted daily by memories of similar sins, but it humbles me by reminding me just how much we need God’s forgiveness and love.

And for those who have shared your own struggles I thank you so very much for helping me not feel alone in my temptation.

Thank YOU for helping me feel less alone.


With love,
Sowndog

 

[Edwin1961]

Rayne,

It seems like everyone else took the ideas I was going to suggest. So I will just say to pray and maybe say a short 4 decade rosary on a mystery that seems appropriate ttime that whenever you sin severely.

God IS with Us!
Edwin

 

[misericordie]

I really blew it. This is humiliating but it’s killing me and I could really use your prayers. I did something completely out of character for me. Last night I looked at indecent pictures on the internet.

It started off innocent enough. I was doing an image search on something totally unrelated and between all these benign pictures this picture shows up. I was startled and quickly passed over it. Well then I found myself typing in less benign words to see what would come up “out of curiousity” I told myself. Well it quickly got out of hand. I tried rationalizing that I wasn’t actually going to the sites but I knew in my head is was wrong and part of me was screaming to stop.

I finally came to my senses and turned it off. I felt sick inside.I wasn’t planning on tell my husband when he came home (after 2am because he works afternoon shift),not because I was trying to hide it to protect myself but because he’s had problems with porn in the past and I was afraid it would be a temptation for him. Well within 5 minutes of him being home I blurted it out. He was shocked but not angry and actually was trying to console me seeing how upset I was.

Well I have resolved never to do that again and I changed my filters (didn’t even realize I could bring up that kind of stuff). And ofcourse I’m going to confession this Saturday. But these images are burned into my mind. I have felt physically sick all day.I normally am repulsed by porn so for the life of me I just don’t understand how I allowed this to happen. I have been praying and I could use your prayers too.

Feel free to throw the book at me for my stupidity because I know I deserve it.

I have been struggling with solitary sin, and well at times I am very tempted to see impure pictures of women, but in sexy lingerie. I rationalize this becuase it is not nakedness, but still, I then always fall into “that” solitary sin afterwards. I know the guilty feelings etc. Don’t be so hard on yourself, just confess, and TRY.

 

[misericordie]

misericordie:

I have been struggling with solitary sin, and well at times I am very tempted to see impure pictures of women, but in sexy lingerie. I rationalize this becuase it is not nakedness, but still, I then always fall into “that” solitary sin afterwards. I know the guilty feelings etc. Don’t be so hard on yourself, just confess, and TRY.

YUP!

 

[jrabs]

rayne89:

My husband and I actually discussed quite a bit possible reasons why I fell into this temptation but I’m not going to discuss that here because it wouldn’t be appropriate. Thank you for your concern. God Bless.

You have my admiration! You fell - OK. You realized it and didn’t get sucked into making a whole evening of it. Great and you confessed it and sought God’s forgiveness.

Here is what I admire, You discussed it at length with your husband. That shows to me how much you love him, trust him , and respect your marriage.

I am in awe and hope to one day have that kind of relationship with someone who cares for me enough to have an open caring relationship.

You are awesome!!!

 

[rayne89]

misericordie:

. Don’t be so hard on yourself, just confess, and TRY.

Thanks Mis!

 

[rayne89]

jrabs:

You have my admiration! You fell - OK. You realized it and didn’t get sucked into making a whole evening of it. Great and you confessed it and sought God’s forgiveness.

Here is what I admire, You discussed it at length with your husband. That shows to me how much you love him, trust him , and respect your marriage.

I am in awe and hope to one day have that kind of relationship with someone who cares for me enough to have an open caring relationship.

You are awesome!!!

Your making me blush . Thank you for your kind words. Trust me it took years to get the point where we are today with trust and open-ness. I feel very lucky and blessed by God. I really hope you do find a wonderful relationship and I pray that you don’t get to where we are by the trials we’ve had. Painful lessons are hardest to forget. God Bless You! You’re awesome too!

 

[misericordie]

rayne89:

Thanks Mis!

Your very welcome. Listen, we are human and fall sometimes. God is ready to forgive. Blessings freind. .

 

[epiphania]

Hi people,
Thought I could make a suggestion which was given to me by one of my spiritual mentors and has helped me: He told me how it helped him - this guy was into a lot of porn before he really came to the Lord and took his faith seriously and then he found that these images would keep coming up in his mind. This is how the Lord let him to get rid of them and he told me to:

During your prayer time, sit down and call upon the holy Spirit to take over, close your eyes and imagine Jesus standing before you (or if you prefer Our Lady) - in whichever way you relate to them (maybe as the Good Shepherd, Sacred Heart…);

Then ask the holy Spirit to bring up and out all these images in your mind: He will! As each image comes up, do a symbolic action (something like putting your hand to your forehead as if youre plucking it out) and hand it over to the Lord Who is standing before you.
And then see the Lord tearing them up/ buring them or however destroying them.
At the same time, thank the Lord for cleansing you of this sin and visualise the Blood of Jesus washing your mind and purifying your imagination!

Keep doing this till all the images have come up - its okay if it all doesnt come up at once or you have to do this two or three different times .

Also, when you receive communion, imagine the Lord entering a closed room which is damp, smelly, dirty and dark…see Him opening the windows, causing the light to come in, sweep and clean out the place and make it beautiful - the room is as u would have guessed your soul/imagination/mind. (Ezekiel 8 - this is just for the image of the defiled temple)

And thank the Lord whenever guilt comes up - like “Thank You Lord, You have indeed forgiven me and cleansed me” - it might sound hollow at first but our confession is our weapon which will defeat the guilt and the lies of the enemy. you will see the difference.

Hope this helps!
Blessings,