I regret becoming Catholic...

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I_Love_My_Wife

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I was once Baptist but I converted to the Catholic Church. I regret my decision because I rushed into it. Intellectually, I cannot accept Protestantism. Intellectually, I believe that the Catholic Church is in line with the Bible.

Nevertheless, I continue to regret and hate my decision to become Catholic. I have this feeling as if I have had my mind warped and I can no longer think clearly, as if I am a slave to the Magisterium.

Is it evil for me to have such thoughts and feelings? What is wrong with me?
 
I_Love_My_Wife said:
I was once Baptist but I converted to the Catholic Church. I regret my decision because I rushed into it. Intellectually, I cannot accept Protestantism. Intellectually, I believe that the Catholic Church is in line with the Bible.

Nevertheless, I continue to regret and hate my decision to become Catholic. I have this feeling as if I have had my mind warped and I can no longer think clearly, as if I am a slave to the Magisterium.

Is it evil for me to have such thoughts and feelings? What is wrong with me?
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First of all - a million difficulties in understanding don’t make you evil. Not a bit. Even lifelong Catholics such as myself have problems in different areas of church teaching, and there’s always so much to learn as well! And when you say ‘regret’ and ‘hate’ - what you ‘regret’ and ‘hate’ are these difficulties, most likely, not actually the Church or Catholicism itself.

What exactly is it about being in line with the Magisterium that makes you feel like you’re being ‘warped’? I can understand that it’s a very different way of thinking about religion, about the Bible and about just about everything than Baptist theology is. You can’t expect such a radical change to immediately be a comfortable fit for you.

And it produces big changes in you as well - maybe it’s this that makes you feel that you’re being ‘warped’?? Imagine yourself as a sapling that’s growing crooked that gets tied to a stake to make it grow straight. That sapling certainly would, if it had reason, feel that such a procedure was difficult, and may even feel like it was being ‘warped’, which isn’t true at all, of course.

Worthwhile things aren’t always easy - in fact they rarely are. Think of things like marriage, raising children, work, study. That’s no reason to shy away from them or hate them or regret them.

You’ve said that you can see that Catholic teaching is in line with the Bible - I presume that includes the passages where Jesus gives authority to Peter and the others to bind and loose? And the passage where He says to them ‘who rejects you rejects me’?

If you accept those then surely it follows naturally that the Church does indeed have supreme teaching authority - in fact ‘all authority’ which Christ had Himself and gave to the Apostles and their successors. It also follows naturally that the Church speaks, when teaching infallibly and under the guidance of the Holy Spirit (which isn’t on all occasions) with the same authority Christ and the Apostles had.

To say one becomes a slave is a very negative way of viewing it. What should happen, though, is that you put on what I’ve heard called the ‘mind of Christ’ - often contrary to our inferior human minds of course - which is the same thing as the mind of His Church.

Or, as John the Baptist put it, that one must decrease (and that means in everything - even in their dependence on their own way of thinking!) so that He may increase.
 
You are not evil. You are simply human. I know of no one who has not had a bit of “spiritual shakiness” in their lifetime!

My advice - pray, and speak with either your pastor or someone else you trust!
 
Remember, satan goes after those he doesn’t have! He wants you. Don’t let him win.
 
I thought being a slave was a good thing, per the bible?

I guess the problem here is - is it good to be a slave to the magesterium?

Depends on which teachings you think are “enslaving” you.

If you could be more specific, it would help.

Having a baptist backround, you certianly value the scriptures. 👍

Is there a biblical problem? or a fellowship problem?
edit to add I like your AKA here- St Joseph comes to mind and more…🙂
 
Thank you for your replies. I know that what I’m saying is quite absurd.

Look at it this way: there are certain anti-Catholic folks on this board who are completely convinced of the truth of their assertions. In their own mind, they are completely logical and true. Yet to those outside their system, their falsehoods are all too conspicuous.

I fear that it my own mind what I believe objectively seems entirely true, yet the system that I have created for myself is such that it seems logical and true to me, yet my errors are conspicuous to others.

In other words, I fear that I am a ridiculous man yet am unaware of it, but what a silly thing to say!

How can I be certain of my own reason and ability to ascertain truth?

Am I making any sense?

Thank you for your prayers. Perhaps that is the only thing that will help me.
 
Dacinom said:
I wish I had words of wisdom to offer you. All I can offer you at this time is my prayers.

You sound so hurt and sad. This must be awful for you. Talk to Jesus, he loves you. He doesn’t want you feeling like this.

Please speak with a trusted Priest. Perhaps he can give you some specific help.

Thank you for feeling comfortable enough to come here and post such a sensitive issue for you. That must have not been easy for you to do. I pray you will find peace. Please take care.
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AMEN:thumbsup:

…and if you could list just one problem area at a time, perhaps we could help you with it.
 
I_Love_My_Wife said:
Thank you for your replies. I know that what I’m saying is quite absurd.

Look at it this way: there are certain anti-Catholic folks on this board who are completely convinced of the truth of their assertions. In their own mind, they are completely logical and true. Yet to those outside their system, their falsehoods are all too conspicuous.

I fear that it my own mind what I believe objectively seems entirely true, yet the system that I have created for myself is such that it seems logical and true to me, yet my errors are conspicuous to others.

In other words, I fear that I am a ridiculous man yet am unaware of it, but what a silly thing to say!

How can I be certain of my own reason and ability to ascertain truth?

Am I making any sense?

Thank you for your prayers. Perhaps that is the only thing that will help me.
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Put it this way - there are a billion or more of us on this planet with the same belief system, so even if by chance you were not on the right path you’d certainly not be ridiculous for one thing 🙂

For another - I don’t think God holds it against we frailer vessels that, in the face of so many conflicting belief systems, there isn’t always one that leaps out at us.
 
I_Love_My_Wife said:
Thank you for your replies. I know that what I’m saying is quite absurd.

Look at it this way: there are certain anti-Catholic folks on this board who are completely convinced of the truth of their assertions. In their own mind, they are completely logical and true. Yet to those outside their system, their falsehoods are all too conspicuous.

I fear that it my own mind what I believe objectively seems entirely true, yet the system that I have created for myself is such that it seems logical and true to me, yet my errors are conspicuous to others.

In other words, I fear that I am a ridiculous man yet am unaware of it, but what a silly thing to say!

How can I be certain of my own reason and ability to ascertain truth?

Am I making any sense?

Thank you for your prayers. Perhaps that is the only thing that will help me.
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faith and reason go together, not apart from each other.🙂

You are making sense!
 
I must have been posting the same time as you, I see that you answered my question before I asked it.
Pray to the Holy Spirit, He will lead you to all Truth.
When I was very young, I had all kinds of opinions and ideas. Quite frequently I would be out-spoken. My father advised me that it was better to look like a fool and to remain quiet, than to open my mouth and remove all doubt.:o
It was then that I deceided to get serious about my faith and started studying what the Church actually taught. I am still learning, we all are. I don’t rely on myself, I rely on the Church and believe all that she teaches. When I am in doubt about something, I find out where MY thinking is wrong. I learned long ago that the Church teaching isn’t. The Church still hands on all the Jesus taught.
Keep asking questions, that is how we learn.
 
How much time have you spent in prayer talking to Jesus about this? My only ‘suggestion’ is increasing your prayer life. Ask the Lord to guide you to where He is calling you to be. In the meantime, do not be anxious, and trust in our Lord to guide you. He knows your heart, and knows that it is Him you are seeking, trust that He will lead you. I will pray for you as well. Peace be with you, and God bless.
 
Kevin, unfortunately when I feel at my worst is when I tend to pray less. But you are correct. I must make a conscious effort to pray even when it seems hopeless.

Thank you. Please continue to pray for me.
 
Maybe you did rush too quickly, maybe not. No one can really know. I would recommend going back to the begining. As Julie Andrews says, that’s a really good place to start. If you are up to the challenge of examining your beliefs and why you have them, you can’t do better that Thomas Aquinas. If you want something a little more up to date, then try Peter Kreeft. Both of these philosphers start with the first question of the existence of God and go from there. Even if you take the existence of God as a given, I think it is helpful to ask yourself why you take it as a given. From there you can look at the person of Jesus and then the Church. I have taken a similar journey twice in my life and believe it to be a faith affirming experieince.
 
I_Love_My_Wife said:
I was once Baptist but I converted to the Catholic Church. I regret my decision because I rushed into it. Intellectually, I cannot accept Protestantism. Intellectually, I believe that the Catholic Church is in line with the Bible.

Nevertheless, I continue to regret and hate my decision to become Catholic. I have this feeling as if I have had my mind warped and I can no longer think clearly, as if I am a slave to the Magisterium.

Is it evil for me to have such thoughts and feelings? What is wrong with me?
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No your mind is not warped. It’s a matter of Trust. The Holy Spirit has been guiding His Church for more than 2000 years. As christians we are slaves to Christ and nobody else.
 
I think it’s your Baptist upbringing that is causing problems for you.

I used to have difficulties praying the Rosary. My parents (who were not religious at all) sent me to a Baptist school for a couple of years when I was in Jr. high. Aside from giving me a really warped perception of God (hey, did you know that we are all born damned? I didn’t until I went to Baptist school…) I was told that the Catholic Church is not Christian, and that the Rosary is 1)Idolatrous (well, OK, Maryolotrous) and 2) a vain repetition.

It took me a long time to get over this. I now happily pray the Rosary daily without reservation.

I know a lot of Fundamentalist churches teach that the Magesterium has a lot of poor, innocent, ignorant Catholics brainwashed into believing that the Church’s teachings are true, even though the guys in the hats and robes know darn well that what they are teaching is false. If you were taught this when you were young, it might be influencing you now.

I recommend megadoses of Rosary.

Also, lots and lots of Scott Hahn and Steve Ray.
 
Meditate on Ephesians chapter 6 - where it says:

“Finally, draw your strength from the Lord and from his mighty power.
Put on the armor of God so that you may be able to stand firm against the tactics of the devil. For our struggle is not with flesh and blood but with the principalities, with the powers, with the world rulers of this present darkness, with the evil spirits in the heavens. Therefore, put on the armor of God, that you may be able to resist on the evil day and, having done everything, to hold your ground. So stand fast with your loins girded in truth, clothed with righteousness as a breastplate, and your feet shod in readiness for the gospel of peace. In all circumstances, hold faith as a shield, to quench all (the) flaming arrows of the evil one. And take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. With all prayer and supplication, pray at every opportunity in the Spirit. To that end, be watchful with all perseverance and supplication for all the holy ones”
 
Our western culture teaches us that we’re to be autonomous, and are not to surrender to, or be subservient to, anyone. Paul tells us he totally belongs to the Christ, and tells us not to be slaves to sin, but be slaves of God (Romans 6). If we totally belong to our Lord, we will fully commit to build up His Kingdom here on earth in whatever ways we can. Following His teachings, as preserved and passed on by His Church, means that we accept the teaching authority of His Church. Most of us probably struggle with, or become disillusioned with, the Church in some way from time to time. Rebellion is part of our human nature, which can be overcome when we seek God’s help. But we’ve gotta keep remembering it’s all about God, who is Love.

Keep praying, and keep reading Scripture to help you pray. Here are some suggestions:
Philippians 4:4-9
Hebrews 11 and 13
2 John
Romans 13
Philippians 2:13-16
 
I say spend a lot of time in prayer. I was raised Baptist and am in the process of converting to Catholicism. I have never felt like a slave to the Church. Mainly because when I am faced with a doctrine of teaching of the Church I am unsure of I study it and pary about it for weeks, months, and ask God for His answer on the issue personally. To reaffirm that this is where I belong and “Is this true?” I don’t believe anything simply because its what the guys in Rome tell me too. I believe it because I study it, pray about it, and know it to be true in my heart and soul.

I guess maybe this long process of prayer is why I am not yet confirmed(trust me I wanna be!) But I do wish you the best. Nothing silly or evil about your thinking. Take care and God Bless!
 
I_Love_My_Wife said:
Thank you for your replies. I know that what I’m saying is quite absurd.

Look at it this way: there are certain anti-Catholic folks on this board who are completely convinced of the truth of their assertions. In their own mind, they are completely logical and true. Yet to those outside their system, their falsehoods are all too conspicuous.

I fear that it my own mind what I believe objectively seems entirely true, yet the system that I have created for myself is such that it seems logical and true to me, yet my errors are conspicuous to others.

In other words, I fear that I am a ridiculous man yet am unaware of it, but what a silly thing to say!

How can I be certain of my own reason and ability to ascertain truth?

Am I making any sense?

Thank you for your prayers. Perhaps that is the only thing that will help me.
Click to expand...
I am in the process of converting, currently in RCIA. I struggle like mad with a lot of things, and I hit this same wall, or something similar to it.

Our RCIA Dcn. explained to me that the Catholic Church proposes, not imposes…a quote that he got from John Paul II. And, he explained to me that the Church is authoritative, not authoritarian.

Actually, here is a blog posting that he put out that covers some of our conversation. He helped me to understand better and shed, mostly, this feeling that religion, in general, exists to remove from me my ability to think for myself.

I fully realize that a lot of this is baggage from my religious past…mormonism. Combined with many years of atheism and a very strong personal declaration that I can take care of myself, no God needed thanks.

Also, this is all so new to me that I don’t really know who I am as a religious person, as a person who believes in God, as a Catholic. So in a sense, this feeling of losing myself is somewhat involved in figuring out who I am, as an individual, who is part of a religious community. It really is quite an unfamiliar experience for me and sometimes it can get to feeling very “not me”. And I also believe it is where a feeling of loneliness comes from. I don’t know where I fit.

It is not easy, moving from one life to another and a religious shift is like an earthquake. It changes you, who you are, how you think, what your values are. If you start doing the look back, you’ll see the person that was you and the person you are now and you may well ask, what the hell??? And in the immortal words of The Talking Heads, “How did I get here?”

But, God guided us to where we are, so continue to trust Him. eh?

I hope this helps you out, and even that it is addressing your struggle. I would be interested in hearing what you think about the blog post, if you don’t mind of course.
 
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