I see my topic has been locked

[Starfish]

My topic of last week “Why I’ll Never Be A Catholic”, was locked. It was mentioned there that I stopped posting at #166 and didn’t bother to write any more.

There is a reason for that. A family member, a few states over, needed help and I was able to assist. I don’t work, I am disabled and have a number of illnesses, but if someone needs me, I’ll do whatever I can. Ergo, that’s why I did not respond after Saturday. This is the first time I have been able to get on a computer since I have been here.

I have also injured my ankle since being here, wearing a cast and crutches, but still willingly helping as I am able. Mind you, this is also with carrying around an oxygen tank.

I have received a number of very kind private messages, but I have also received many that have called me many, many names, names that are NOT Christian in the least. I’ve been told that I’ve made up everything in the original thread, that I have been bashing the RCC, etc. I have not. I don’t lie about what I had learned. Someone really gave it to me with both barrels, when I mentioned the priest who said about my preemie nephew, “if he dies, he dies,” and it was a pretty much “so what” thing from him.

Hardly Christian.

I appreciate all the understanding from some of you and for the others who called me the names, I have learned forgiveness and forgive. When a drunk driver tried to end my husband’s life, I could be bitter, but in court, I told him that I forgive his actions. He didn’t know what to say.

So, I apologize for divorcing and remarrying. No, I don’t. I have a wonderful husband and he’s the best thing that has happened to me. No, not the best, the best thing is when I was born again and accepted Jesus as my Savior.

I don’t know when I’ll be on the computer again, but I did want to write and say that I did not start a hot thread, and then leave without any comment.

God bless.

 

[JRKH]

My topic of last week “Why I’ll Never Be A Catholic”, was locked. It was mentioned there that I stopped posting at #166 and didn’t bother to write any more.

There is a reason for that. A family member, a few states over, needed help and I was able to assist. I don’t work, I am disabled and have a number of illnesses, but if someone needs me, I’ll do whatever I can. Ergo, that’s why I did not respond after Saturday. This is the first time I have been able to get on a computer since I have been here.

I have also injured my ankle since being here, wearing a cast and crutches, but still willingly helping as I am able. Mind you, this is also with carrying around an oxygen tank.

I have received a number of very kind private messages, but I have also received many that have called me many, many names, names that are NOT Christian in the least. I’ve been told that I’ve made up everything in the original thread, that I have been bashing the RCC, etc. I have not. I don’t lie about what I had learned. Someone really gave it to me with both barrels, when I mentioned the priest who said about my preemie nephew, “if he dies, he dies,” and it was a pretty much “so what” thing from him.

Hardly Christian.

I appreciate all the understanding from some of you and for the others who called me the names, I have learned forgiveness and forgive. When a drunk driver tried to end my husband’s life, I could be bitter, but in court, I told him that I forgive his actions. He didn’t know what to say.

So, I apologize for divorcing and remarrying. No, I don’t. I have a wonderful husband and he’s the best thing that has happened to me. No, not the best, the best thing is when I was born again and accepted Jesus as my Savior.

Satrfish,
I highlighted the one part simply because this is exactly how I describe my Lady. She is truly the best thing that ever happened to my - In this World". Of course God is First in All things but She is the most precious gift He ever gave me. And what’s best is He gave me this gift when I was living a sinful Life.

I don’t know why the Lord has been so good to me, but I plan on spending the rest of my life trying to be more worthy of His Love and Grace.

I know that you are happy where you are and that is great. I hope that, as time goes on and you hang around here a bit, you can get past some of the old stuff that hurt you in the Church and see Her in a better light.

In God’s Good time.

Love and Peace on your journey.
James

 

[nmoerbeek]

My topic of last week “Why I’ll Never Be A Catholic”, was locked. It was mentioned there that I stopped posting at #166 and didn’t bother to write any more.

There is a reason for that. A family member, a few states over, needed help and I was able to assist. I don’t work, I am disabled and have a number of illnesses, but if someone needs me, I’ll do whatever I can. Ergo, that’s why I did not respond after Saturday. This is the first time I have been able to get on a computer since I have been here.

I have also injured my ankle since being here, wearing a cast and crutches, but still willingly helping as I am able. Mind you, this is also with carrying around an oxygen tank.

I have received a number of very kind private messages, but I have also received many that have called me many, many names, names that are NOT Christian in the least. I’ve been told that I’ve made up everything in the original thread, that I have been bashing the RCC, etc. I have not. I don’t lie about what I had learned. Someone really gave it to me with both barrels, when I mentioned the priest who said about my preemie nephew, “if he dies, he dies,” and it was a pretty much “so what” thing from him.

Hardly Christian.

I appreciate all the understanding from some of you and for the others who called me the names, I have learned forgiveness and forgive. When a drunk driver tried to end my husband’s life, I could be bitter, but in court, I told him that I forgive his actions. He didn’t know what to say.

So, I apologize for divorcing and remarrying. No, I don’t. I have a wonderful husband and he’s the best thing that has happened to me. No, not the best, the best thing is when I was born again and accepted Jesus as my Savior.

I don’t know when I’ll be on the computer again, but I did want to write and say that I did not start a hot thread, and then leave without any comment.

God bless.

Mark Chapter 8

36 For what shall it profit a man, if he gain the whole world, and suffer the loss of his soul? 37 Or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul? 38 For he that shall be ashamed of me, and of my words, in this adulterous and sinful generation: the Son of man also will be ashamed of him, when he shall come in the glory of his Father with the holy angels.

 

[JaMc]

That thread was definitely getting out of hand, and some of the personal attacks were certainly uncalled for. Though, to start out a thread with a title like “Why I Will Never Again be a Catholic,” especially in the Traditional Catholicism forum, is very provocative.

For my part, I never questioned that the OP was taught those things, or even that she believed them. My concern is that she based her decision to leave the Church upon lies, rather than the what the Church actually teaches.

When a group of (all too human) authority figures within the Church spout off borderline heresy to impressionable children, with a good amount of physical and emotional abuse to boot, it, unfortunately, can create hard feelings regarding the Church they purport to represent. However, I would urge her to take a step back, see what the Church really teaches, and then discuss actual doctrinal issues with which she may still disagree.

 

[deb1]

I think that the thread was locked because of people on both sides were getting a bit unpleasant to one another. Plus the thread was breaking off into all sorts of topics.

 

[Starfish]

Yes, after reading the thread, it was totally out of control. As I mentioned, I was not able to log on until today and saw that it was locked.

I do NOT feel as if I am living an adulterous life. Was I to stay married to the man who beat me? Abused me? Who cheated on me? Who didn’t work, was happy for me to support him and then to support him after the divorce? I left a wonderful, high-paying job so I wouldn’t have to support his lazy bottom. I regret leaving that job, but again, I was not going to support a lazy, do-nothing, wife-beater.

I have asked God for forgiveness in the matter of the divorce and I KNOW that He has forgiven me.

 

[Eucharisted]

Yes, after reading the thread, it was totally out of control. As I mentioned, I was not able to log on until today and saw that it was locked.

I do NOT feel as if I am living an adulterous life. Was I to stay married to the man who beat me? Abused me? Who cheated on me? Who didn’t work, was happy for me to support him and then to support him after the divorce? I left a wonderful, high-paying job so I wouldn’t have to support his lazy bottom. I regret leaving that job, but again, I was not going to support a lazy, do-nothing, wife-beater.

I have asked God for forgiveness in the matter of the divorce and I KNOW that He has forgiven me.

O Lord, guide Starfish across the sea to the safe harbor of Heaven.

 

[JRKH]

Yes, after reading the thread, it was totally out of control. As I mentioned, I was not able to log on until today and saw that it was locked.

I do NOT feel as if I am living an adulterous life. Was I to stay married to the man who beat me? Abused me? Who cheated on me? Who didn’t work, was happy for me to support him and then to support him after the divorce? I left a wonderful, high-paying job so I wouldn’t have to support his lazy bottom. I regret leaving that job, but again, I was not going to support a lazy, do-nothing, wife-beater.

I have asked God for forgiveness in the matter of the divorce and I KNOW that He has forgiven me.

Of course I will not make any judgement on your current situation. I will only say that, based on what you have said, you would have no trouble obtaining an anullment. So, if you ever do consider returning to The Church, your divorce and remarriage should not be a major issue.
If you’d like me to share my and my wife’s personal experience I’d be happy to PM you. Just so that you would have teh info.

Peace
James

 

[deb1]

Yes, after reading the thread, it was totally out of control. As I mentioned, I was not able to log on until today and saw that it was locked.

I do NOT feel as if I am living an adulterous life. Was I to stay married to the man who beat me? Abused me? Who cheated on me? Who didn’t work, was happy for me to support him and then to support him after the divorce? I left a wonderful, high-paying job so I wouldn’t have to support his lazy bottom. I regret leaving that job, but again, I was not going to support a lazy, do-nothing, wife-beater.

Certainly, no one would ask you to have remained in that marriage!! I can only give you the Catholic view but, of course, you do not have to abide by it as you no longer consider yourself Catholic.

If you were a practicing Catholic you could leave the marriage and get a legal divorce and wait to remarry until you found out if your first marriage could be annulled. I am not an expert on annulments but I believe if you did not have all the information available at the time of your marriage to make an informed decisions, then an annulment can be granted. (Again, I know very little about such processes)

Also, I hope that you are feeling well.

 

[thistle]

Yes, after reading the thread, it was totally out of control. As I mentioned, I was not able to log on until today and saw that it was locked.

I do NOT feel as if I am living an adulterous life. Was I to stay married to the man who beat me? Abused me? Who cheated on me? Who didn’t work, was happy for me to support him and then to support him after the divorce? I left a wonderful, high-paying job so I wouldn’t have to support his lazy bottom. I regret leaving that job, but again, I was not going to support a lazy, do-nothing, wife-beater.

I have asked God for forgiveness in the matter of the divorce and I KNOW that He has forgiven me.

I don’t recollect the other thread. It sounds like you had a good reason for divorcing your first husband. However, are you saying you are leaving the Catholic Church because you are divorced and now have another husband which of course God forbids unless you have an annulment?

 

[Yours_Truly]

So, I apologize for divorcing and remarrying. No, I don’t. I have a wonderful husband and he’s the best thing that has happened to me. No, not the best, the best thing is when I was born again and accepted Jesus as my Savior.

But to be born again a person has to believe in Jesus; and to believe in Jesus means more than just believing that Jesus Christ existed, for even the Muslims and Jehovah’s Witnesses - neither of whome believe that He is God - believe that He existed. To really believe in Jesus we must believe that He is God; and if we believe that He is God we must believe that what He taught is true. Yet if we believe He is God, and that what He taught is true, we would have to believe Him when he taught the following:

“Every one that putteth away his wife, and marrieth another, committeth adultery: and he that marrieth her that is put away from her husband, committeth adultery” (Luke 16:18).

If you believe in Jesus, you will also believe these words of Jesus; and if you don’t believe these words of Jesus, then your believe in Him is no different than that of the Muslims and Jehovah’s Witnesses. You are not obliged to remain with an abusive person, but you are forbidden to enter into an adulterous “marriage” with another person. Polygamy is forbidden and no man can separate what God has joined together.

My sense is that God is calling you back to Himself. Both you and God know that your “re-marriage” has separated you from God. God realizes this completely, whereas you yourself only realize this in your subconscience. You are trying to convince yourself that what you know to be true inside, is not really true… but this will not work. Your conscience is not yet dead (thanks be to God). It is alerting you to the danger of your situation and calling you to repentance. God is calling you home to His Church, while you are seeking excuses for not returning.

Believe in Jesus - believe what He taught - and return to the Catholic Church where you belong. Life is short; eternity is long. Don’t sacrifice the later for the former. One good confession will wash away your sin resulting from your disbelief in our Lord’s very clear words.

You are making excuses for not returning. What you said in your original thread that you were taught in schoold during your youth is not what the Church teaches. I actually doubt that you were taught this, but even if you were it is not what the Church teaches. Why would a nun, who prays to Jesus every day, tell you that you are forbidden from praying to Jesus and must pray to Mary? Your school years were many years ago. If I can’t remember much I was taught in school 25 years ago, how can you yourself remember these teaching so clearly? I am almost positive that this is not what you were taught. You may have convinced yourself that you were taught this (in order to justify your second “marriage”), but the reality is that you are using this to justify your own conscience.

I really believe that God is calling you through his actual grace. You are very fortunate because, unlike others, He has not given up on you. He is attempting to draw you back to Him, and your posts here are merely your reaction to His grace. What you are writing on these boards is your reaction to His inspirations of grace. Turn not a deaf ear to your God who is calling you. Go to confession at once and clear your consience, That is what God wills for you. It may be that you are near the end of your life, and this is your last chance. You made a very BIG mistake, but it is not too late to repent of it. I realize this is not easy, but if you really believe in Jesus you know what you must do. Pray, go to confession, and ask the Priest to guide you. I will pray for you.

 

[JRKH]

To All,
Starfish’s other topic was about why she would never be catholic again and actually the divorce issue was not even brought up in the original post. Several other things were though relating to what and how she was taught as a child. And due to an unfortunate combination of how the OP was constructed and how we others took it, it became very heated.
From what I gather, Starfish is content where she is - at least for now, so I don’t think she is asking for advise re: her marriage. Though obviously we all have some we can give her. As to Christ’s command re: marriage etc. Since he said that to the Jews (those with a common heritage)I don’t know how we apply that here. If a person feels that they were not really a Christian until they were “born again” would an old marriage apply? Could be a difficult call. I think that St Paul addressed the issue of being married to a “pagan” and made a recommendation, but again I am not sure how to apply these things. In all I think we need to give Starfish some time to digest what has been said, regroup and maybe repost some specific items she might like addressed.

I do hope that she would feel that we can address any issues with her more lovingly than happened in the other post which is best left closed and buried.

Peace
James

 

[Among_Strangers]

I hope your ankle heals quickly. But then if it doesn’t you can use that nice heavy cast to whack any numbskulls upside the noggin, I mean if you need to. You might not. Just saying.

as a side note - CAF really isn’t known for its pastoral advice because it’s just not set up for it. We have to live in community to get pastoral advice. Of course this being a Catholic site most folks will strongly encourage you to seek a Catholic community so you can receive that pastoral advice. I understand that sometimes that seems to fail individuals from time to time. Lord have mercy on us all. Peace.

 

[BayernAnhaenger]

Yes, after reading the thread, it was totally out of control. As I mentioned, I was not able to log on until today and saw that it was locked.

I do NOT feel as if I am living an adulterous life. Was I to stay married to the man who beat me? Abused me? Who cheated on me? Who didn’t work, was happy for me to support him and then to support him after the divorce? I left a wonderful, high-paying job so I wouldn’t have to support his lazy bottom. I regret leaving that job, but again, I was not going to support a lazy, do-nothing, wife-beater.

I have asked God for forgiveness in the matter of the divorce and I KNOW that He has forgiven me.

Pride.

Check it out.

 

[JRKH]

Pride.

Check it out.

I would ask that we refrain from such snippy remarks.
They serve no useful purpose and are even counterproductive.
Pride can be just as big a problem for a catholic as for a non-catholic.
So let us ALL check our pride at the door.

Peace
James

 

[BayernAnhaenger]

I would ask that we refrain from such snippy remarks.
They serve no useful purpose and are even counterproductive.
Pride can be just as big a problem for a catholic as for a non-catholic.
So let us ALL check our pride at the door.

Peace
James

She said:
I have asked God for forgiveness in the matter of the divorce and I KNOW that He has forgiven me.

Once she has received absolution from a Catholic priest, then I’ll refrain from my “snippy” remarks. Until then, my words stand. She is full of arrogance and pride in that statement.

 

[adelore]

Starfish,

I will keep you in my prayers. I don’t remember a lot about the other thread, but I would like to share with you and the others on here something I was taught as a child. Here is what happened.

I was standing in line in my pretty white dress and veil waiting for my class to go into the Church to receive my first Communion. When Father Wing was going to each of us children telling us how nice we looked. When he got to me and told me how nice I looked I bursted out in tears. He knelt down to my level and asked what was wrong…Feeling all kinds of Guilt at that age…I said, “I can’t take my first Communion, I didn’t go to Confession First.”

As he wiped my tears away, he said, “Annette you don’t have to go to Confession, you can go to God and Confess your sins. You may go and recieve your Communion”. Now keep in mind I was Not the only child that head this!

Fast Forward to Years Later: The Confessionals in Our Parish and Other Parishes around Michigan have been taken out! The People of the Church have been told that they may Confess their sins to God. Those that still **want **to go to Confesson **with a Priest, **may still do so, face to face by an Appointment.

I am now 51 years old. I only tell my age so that others may know how many years ago this was and what IS being taught now.

Do I think Starfish remembers what she was taught? Of course…I do…and believe me not everyone is taught the same in the Catholic Church. I attended 12 years of CC class. My children went to a Catholic School. (they are grown now) and it is true, not everyone is taught all the same things and yes, there are Parishes and Catholic Schools that do teach different. (or leave out a lot, I guess I should say). So please don’t think she doesn’t remember correctly…she does.

Although I have learned a lot on this fourm…(much I had never even heard of) and I also have my nieces RICA class book and leaflets, you’d be amazed at what is Not being taught to even RICA classes. My niece as an Adult, married woman, got baptized, did go to her First Confesion, (then was also told only the First Confession to a Priest was requried) and that she could Confess to God on her own, that Confession to a Priest was for those who Felt the need, but no longer required. She then was Confirmed into the Catholic Church. My niece is 35 and has only been a member of the Catholic Church for 2 years.

So through No-Fault of the members of the Catholic Church, just maybe we should consider not everyone is being taught the same. Now someone might say…we should report this. Ok well how would we know what to report, if we didn’t know what we were taught was wrong? And if we were taught that…then we come onto the Forums…(just for a moment consider this) why would we believe what the Forums are saying over what we were taught in the Church? Do you see what I’m saying?

So again Starfish I do fully understand what you are saying…for I myself was taught “different things” than some others here on the forums. And how can I say…what I was taught was wrong and peoples thoughts and opinions on the Forums are right?

I hope this helps others to understand that not everyone is taught all the same things even in the Catholic Church.

 

[adelore]

She said:
I have asked God for forgiveness in the matter of the divorce and I KNOW that He has forgiven me.

Once she has received absolution from a Catholic priest, then I’ll refrain from my “snippy” remarks. Until then, my words stand. She is full of arrogance and pride in that statement.

Please read post #17. Maybe this will help you to understand that Not all of us were taught the same. Nor today are taught the way you believe by the Church or her Priest.

I too have been married (outside the Catholic Church) then divorced and remarried now for many years.

I went to our Priest in New Bosten, MI where I had attended the Catholic Church for 5 years there, (since that is where we lived at the time. My children went to the Catholic School there and I ran the hot lunch program there. I did not grow up in this Catholic Church, please keep this in mind. The Catholic Church I grew up in was across the state.) I had asked the Priest about me being divorced and re-married. I asked about me going to Communion and did the Catholic Church reconize my marriage. He told me that as long I had not been married into the Catholic Church the first time, that yes the Church would reconize my second marriage, (I was also married the second time out of the Church) that all I would have to do is have my marraige Blessed.

And Yes I could go to Commuinon! and are you ready for this? He said Yes I could go to Communion because the Catholic Church didn’t reconize my first marriage in the first place…so I wasn’t commiting Adultry by being Divorced and re-married. But I did need to have my second marriage blessed.

Then I move back across the state of MI, I ask the same questions, I got the same answers from yet another couple of Priest…

So please know there are those of us who have been to different Catholic Churchs and we are not getting the same information that you are.

What is a person to do? Should we not believe the different Priest? After all they are our teachers. Or should we believe eveything the forums say?

Please do not call it Arrogrance and Pride (on her part) please consider that many of us truely may be asking Priestly Advice…and why would we not believe our Priest?

 

[BayernAnhaenger]

So again Starfish I do fully understand what you are saying…for I myself was taught “different things” than some others here on the forums. And how can I say…what I was taught was wrong and peoples thoughts and opinions on the Forums are right?

Well, you can know you were taught wrong, because the Catholic Church teaches otherwise. The Sacrament of Confession is necessary, and every soul MUST be in a state of grace (ie, no mortal sin) when receiving the Eucharist.

Proof?
newadvent.org/cathen/11618c.htm
The Catholic Encyclopedia from 1911.

The faithful are also required to go to confession once a year.

“But, as the Council of Trent affirms, “the Church did not through the Lateran Council prescribe that the faithful of Christ should confess – a thing which it knew to be by Divine right necessary and established – but that the precept of confessing at least once a year should be complied with by all and every one when they reached the age of discretion” (Sess., XIV, c. 5). The Lateran edict presupposed the necessity of confession as an article of Catholic belief and laid down a law as to the minimum frequency of confession – at least once a year.”

Also, you can tell if the forum people are right by a little investigation into factual sources.

 

[adelore]

Starfish,

I will keep you in my prayers. I don’t remember a lot about the other thread, but I would like to share with you and the others on here something I was taught as a child. Here is what happened.

I was standing in line in my pretty white dress and veil waiting for my class to go into the Church to receive my first Communion. When Father Wing was going to each of us children telling us how nice we looked. When he got to me and told me how nice I looked I bursted out in tears. He knelt down to my level and asked what was wrong…Feeling all kinds of Guilt at that age…I said, “I can’t take my first Communion, I didn’t go to Confession First.”

As he wiped my tears away, he said, “Annette you don’t have to go to Confession, you can go to God and Confess your sins. You may go and recieve your Communion”. Now keep in mind I was Not the only child that head this!

Fast Forward to Years Later: The Confessionals in Our Parish and Other Parishes around Michigan have been taken out! The People of the Church have been told that they may Confess their sins to God. Those that still **want **to go to Confesson **with a Priest, **may still do so, face to face by an Appointment.

I am now 51 years old. I only tell my age so that others may know how many years ago this was and what IS being taught now.

Do I think Starfish remembers what she was taught? Of course…I do…and believe me not everyone is taught the same in the Catholic Church. I attended 12 years of CC class. My children went to a Catholic School. (they are grown now) and it is true, not everyone is taught all the same things and yes, there are Parishes and Catholic Schools that do teach different. (or leave out a lot, I guess I should say). So please don’t think she doesn’t remember correctly…she does.

Although I have learned a lot on this fourm…(much I had never even heard of) and I also have my nieces RICA class book and leaflets, you’d be amazed at what is Not being taught to even RICA classes. My niece as an Adult, RE-married woman, got baptized, did go to her First Confesion, (then was also told only the First Confession to a Priest was requried) and that she could Confess to God on her own, that Confession to a Priest was for those who Felt the need, but no longer required. She then was Confirmed into the Catholic Church. My niece is 35 and has only been a member of the Catholic Church for 2 years.

So through No-Fault of the members of the Catholic Church, just maybe we should consider not everyone is being taught the same. Now someone might say…we should report this. Ok well how would we know what to report, if we didn’t know what we were taught was wrong? And if we were taught that…then we come onto the Forums…(just for a moment consider this) why would we believe what the Forums are saying over what we were taught in the Church? Do you see what I’m saying?

So again Starfish I do fully understand what you are saying…for I myself was taught “different things” than some others here on the forums. And how can I say…what I was taught was wrong and peoples thoughts and opinions on the Forums are right?

I hope this helps others to understand that not everyone is taught all the same things even in the Catholic Church.