I shouldn't feel this way

[UtahMaggie]

Not sure if I posted this in the right forum.

My sister is currently in jail. She was telling me that there was a woman in a cell by herself and away from the other women. No one knew who she was or what she was in for. It turns out, she had beat her 10 year old stepdaughter to death about a year ago. My sister told me that after she was sentenced, she was going to be transfered to another facility. Although she was always supposed to be kept away from the other women for her own protection, someone in the jail personel made a mistake and when she was preparing to board the bus to be transported, she was put in a room with two other women. One of the women recognized her from the news and attacked her and beat her up for what she did to the 10 year old girl. When my sister told me this, I was actually happy! I would have been upset if the other woman had killed this inmate but I felt that she got what she deserved for killing her stepdaughter. I feel so guilty that I was happy for what happened to her. It’s been a week since I found out and I still don’t feel bad that she was beat up. What’s wrong with me? I’m not usually like this.

 

[GGirl]

We are called to justice by God.

Sounds like you wanted retribution for that little girl’s death, an eye for an eye, so to speak. That is a human feeling. As humans, we cannot control our feelings. We can, however, control our actions.

Whether the legal system succeeded in justice is out of our hands. True justice is in the hands of the Lord.

You cannot stop the initial feelings of retribution’s happiness. What you can do is ask yourself, “What would Christ do?” and consciously affirm God’s justice and mercy vs. human failings.

As always, look to the Divine.

 

[LilyM]

I think it requires extraordinary grace to see everyone exactly as God sees them all and loves them all. Nonetheless this is what we are called on to try to do.

How would God view this unfortunate victim of violence? Very likely there are aspects of her story that you don’t know about - perhaps undiagnosed mental illness? Perhaps she was abused in her own past, and this prison bashing will be the final nail in the coffin of her chances of rehailitation, of a normal life and normal relationships?

In the end, remember that judgement really belongs to God (and the woman’s confessor, should she have one) alone. We none of us can see into the state of another’s heart and soul.

Let me be clear, being human, most of us aren’t at the point where we can deeply grieve with the suffering of one who has caused so much suffering as well.

But perhaps we can at least grieve for the souls and spirits of those who perpetrated this horrible attack her when she (presumably) did them no harm. Surely this only degrades them further if nothing else.