I think I am under attack

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Reread the story of Creation. God loves us, not out of pity, but because he looked at what He made and saw that it was “VERY good”. Not mediocre, not, “eh they try”, or “they arent coming close”. VERY GOOD
 
Be at peace. A total stranger feels grief for your situation.
God bless.
 
For Archus:

“O Glorious Prince of the heavenly host, St. Michael the Archangel, defend us in the battle and in the terrible warfare that we are waging against the principalities and powers, against the rulers of this world of darkness, against the evil spirits. Come to the aid of man, whom Almighty God created immortal, made in His own image and likeness, and redeemed at a great price from the tyranny of Satan.

“Fight this day the battle of the Lord, together with the holy angels, as already thou hast fought the leader of the proud angels, Lucifer, and his apostate host, who were powerless to resist thee, nor was there place for them any longer in Heaven. That cruel, ancient serpent, who is called the devil or Satan who seduces the whole world, was cast into the abyss with his angels. Behold, this primeval enemy and slayer of men has taken courage. Transformed into an angel of light, he wanders about with all the multitude of wicked spirits, invading the earth in order to blot out the name of God and of His Christ, to seize upon, slay and cast into eternal perdition souls destined for the crown of eternal glory. This wicked dragon pours out, as a most impure flood, the venom of his malice on men of depraved mind and corrupt heart, the spirit of lying, of impiety, of blasphemy, and the pestilent breath of impurity, and of every vice and iniquity.

“These most crafty enemies have filled and inebriated with gall and bitterness the Church, the spouse of the immaculate Lamb, and have laid impious hands on her most sacred possessions. In the Holy Place itself, where the See of Holy Peter and the Chair of Truth has been set up as the light of the world, they have raised the throne of their abominable impiety, with the iniquitous design that when the Pastor has been struck, the sheep may be.

“Arise then, O invincible Prince, bring help against the attacks of the lost spirits to the people of God, and give them the victory. They venerate thee as their protector and patron; in thee holy Church glories as her defense against the malicious power of hell; to thee has God entrusted the souls of men to be established in heavenly beatitude. Oh, pray to the God of peace that He may put Satan under our feet, so far conquered that he may no longer be able to hold men in captivity and harm the Church. Offer our prayers in the sight of the Most High, so that they may quickly find mercy in the sight of the Lord; and vanquishing the dragon, the ancient serpent, who is the devil and Satan, do thou again make him captive in the abyss, that he may no longer seduce the nations. Amen.
V. Behold the Cross of the Lord; be scattered ye hostile powers.
R. The Lion of the tribe of Judah has conquered the root of David.
V. Let Thy mercies be upon us, O Lord.
R. As we have hoped in Thee.
V. O Lord, hear my prayer.
R. And let my cry come unto Thee.

Let us pray.
O God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, we call upon Thy holy Name, and as supplicants, we implore Thy clemency, that by the intercession of Mary, ever Virgin Immaculate and our Mother, and of the glorious St. Michael the Archangel, Thou wouldst deign to help us against Satan and all the other unclean spirits who wander about the world for the injury of the human race and the ruin of souls. Amen.”

Roman Raccolta, July 23, 1898, supplement approved July 31, 1902,
London: Burnes, Oates & Washbourne Ltd., 1935, 12th edition.
traditioninaction.org/religious/b009rpMichael.htm
 
Dear Jesus

Please grant Archus wisdom- help him to realise just how much you love him and that nothing he has done or could do could ever change that. Help him to realise that you gave up your life, you were crucified freely. Lord, please guide him in the mission you have called him to. Grant him forgiveness and mercy- help him to repent- and then to walk forwards. Help him to let go of what holds him captive and to hold on to you. Help him to accept the grace you give him. Grant him enlightenment that he may walk in your truth, trusting, hoping and loving you. Give him a humble, servant’s heart that he may realise his littleness but that you are great and that all good things come from you. Mary, shelter him under your mantle- you know what is in his heart. Holy Spirit, fill him with your presence and drive away all doubt, fear and darkness. Lord help him to place all his trust in you

Amen.
 
I will pray that you can work these issues out and be blessed with the peace that passes understanding. May the love, grace and mercy of our Lord surround you and bless you.

And, while I rarely give advice, it almost seems as if you believe IN God but you are having a hard time Believing GOD. You need to remember that God does not lie - if He said he will NO LONGER REMEMBER your confessed/repented sins then He means it! (Hebrew 8:12 among others). If He said He loves you regardless then He means it.

Believe HIM - If he said it He means it!
 
Archus said:
I I couldn’t get more childish if I tried, really.

Basically, I need you to pray to Jesus and Mary for me. Something is stopping me returning to who I was, and being part of my heavenly family. .
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sounds like your instincts are right, and you issues are rooted in becoming part of the family relationship of the Trinity. you are probably also finding connections with your own personal family relationships that may need to be dealt with, even with counselling if they seem that serious to you. For instance a conflict with your own mother or siblings that is not resolved.

Jeff Cavins gives a beautiful testimony about his troubled relationship with his own father, and how healing there was necessary before he could progress in his relationship with God the Father.
 
puzzleannie said:
sounds like your instincts are right, and you issues are rooted in becoming part of the family relationship of the Trinity. you are probably also finding connections with your own personal family relationships that may need to be dealt with, even with counselling if they seem that serious to you. For instance a conflict with your own mother or siblings that is not resolved.

Jeff Cavins gives a beautiful testimony about his troubled relationship with his own father, and how healing there was necessary before he could progress in his relationship with God the Father.
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Thanks for that. My relationship in my family is hunky-dorey though. However, I am the only one in my family who is Catholic so there may be some tension there. I would like to point out that we don’t hate each other for anything - my dad and my sister both attended my confirmation, and my mum always asks me to say a prayer for her when I go to Mass, and my dad keeps supporting me should I want to talk to him about it.

I think it stems from me not having an ‘older brother’. I’m the eldest (to one sister) and so I’ve never had sibling rivalry or jealousy towards someone else in my family. I think that was a new feeling, more than anything, and the shock was a bit too much that time :D.

I’m fine now, btw. They feel a little distant atm, but that’s fine. I can’t expect them to be all luvvy-duvvy 24/7. I’m feeling a little (and I mean a *very *little) strained with Jesus, but I’m going to say some prayers to his Sacred Heart and meditate on him, and I’m sure that will be fine.

I want to thank you all for your support and dealing with my little tantrum. I’ll remember you all in my prayers this evening and remember what you have all said (mainly because I can download it :p).

Pax Fratus Meus Vobiscum (I hope I got that Latin correct).
 
You sound much better. It sounds like you carrie a lot in your family. It also sounds like you have big shoulders. I say that because in your rage you could have done hurtful damaging things, but instead you came to this website, which is yet another way to seek him. May I suggest a great website about the Lay Apostle Ann. She is for our times. Read her messages from God and you will understand what I mean. Go to www.directionforourtimes.com Read her messages. You may find some comfort. When you have time let me know what you think. Just reading them gave me great comfort and great understanding in what our purpose of growing spirtual in the way he decides.
 
RE what I said earlier - don’t let it go too far. As someone replied, it can be dangerous because you can go far.
 
It would be best for me not to do it at all. That is not the way the Lord works - he does not lead us into any situation so that evil may result from it.

It is the same for issues such as abortion. The people of the world try to justify their acts by employing a line, a cut off point as to when they decide when it is a collection of cells and a human being. But where exactly is that line? Not only do medical bodies vary on the definition, but the precise moment cannot be accurately calculated - you run the risk of killing a human.

So the way of the Lord is not not have a line at all - every person is sacred from conception, no exceptions.

I will not shout at my Lord, as that will provoke the enemy to take root in my person. It is safer and wiser to go around the problem entirely, than to become a fool and dance with death.
 
My only suggestion is to go before Our Lord in a Catholic Church where the Blessed Sacrament is exposed.

Many times in the past when I have felt the way you described I have found that just sitting there quietly in His Presence is the best thing. He listens to me and comforts like no one else can.

Another suggestion is attending daily Mass after first having gone to Confession. The graces that we all receive from this sacrament of Reconciliation are u:gopray2: :gopray2: ndescribable.
 
Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with Thee. Blessed art thou among women, and blessed is the Fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death. Amen.
 
I don’t know what your history is ( I haven’t read anything else posted by you) so I hope my advice will help you in some way.

Even when you least want to–pray to them, fight through it, even if you are feeling revulsed (for lack of better word) while praying to them - KEEP PRAYING! This is a spiritual fight and you will be victorious. When you are having these thoughts and feelings block them out, say “Praise be to Jesus” as many times as it takes until it passes. Don’t give up, you must fight- it is a spiritual war and you will be victorious and come to peace with Jesus, but you must meet it head on and pray with all your heart at all times. Don’t give in to the fallen angel, you have the power through Jesus to defeat him. Have trust and faith, always remembering that each day is a new day.
Read Ephesians (all of it, but especially chapter 6).

You can do it! I will keep you in my prayers and may God Bless You!
 
Archus said:
I understand the whole thing with Mary, that in a sense has cleared up, but something else has manifested.

As a consequence of that outburst and a subsequent sin (inflicted upon my person, so don’t worry about anyone else), I am starting to feel angry towards Christ now. It is specifically the Son, not the Father or Holy Spirit.

I’ve never felt this before. My best guess is that it is a jealousy of a more successful older brother, where my attitude towards Jesus is ‘oo look at him all saving the world, being the Christ and all’ and I feel really stupid and childish, and envious and hateful towards Christ, whom I adored as a brother, friend, Lord and God. Because of that, these feelings are unnatural and I think it has an external source, and I want everything to be as they were, but there is a barrier that is stopping me being with him and Mary.

People may say ‘but he loves you and he will come to you!’ and in the corners of my heart that only draws me more away from him, because it is really ticking me off on how ‘good’ he is…

I couldn’t get more childish if I tried, really.

Basically, I need you to pray to Jesus and Mary for me. Something is stopping me returning to who I was, and being part of my heavenly family. It may be me, it may be something else. I am left in the cold, my dear brothers and sisters, will you get my message to them, and could you offer advice? (Leave out confession - I’m going at the beginning of September. I won’t go before then because when I started out, I went weekly and it did nothing to help me progress. I’m disciplining myself to go at the beginning of every month. It has had great result so far, but this is my darkest time yet - I can’t even turn to Mary any more!)

I’m going to pray for others now. I need to keep trying, and set aside my personal affairs, and work on my sacred duty as a brother to you all.

I thank you for reading, and may God bless you should you take the effort to help a wayward pilgrim such as myself.
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Dearest brother,

I understand you completely because I also experienced the same devilish attacks you are having now. Though, not as brutal as “hating the Chirst”, but in the same sense as turning away from Him.

You are right, the feelings you have against Christ is NOT YOU, but from the Devil who hated our Lord from the very start. Our problem right now is that the EVIL ONE IS ALWAYS AROUND YOU. The worst scenario would be the DEVIL TAKING FULL CONTROL of your soul, leading you away from the prayers, religious activities and leading you straight to worldliness and sins, making your life miserable.

Here are some tips I could give you which you should perhaps consider, before it’s too late:
  1. Reflect which side you want to be with, God or Satan?
  2. If you want to be with GOD, then Choose everything that is GOOD and repel inside you everything that is EVIL.
  3. If you choose God, pray and tell God you are His child, and to make you very humble.
  4. Seek Humility and Love at all times, you need these Two(2) basic virtues to receive graces from God because “God repels the proud”.
  5. Repel EGO and PRIDE inside you, it is the Devil’s hiding place in your soul. It does not matter what profession we have now, or what degree we received in this world, they are nothing before God.
  6. SINs in our soul is the breeding place of the Devil, you should confess to the priest to remove it. I was asking for mercy before the statue of the Immaculate Heart of Mary last year, and then I heard in my soul Mary saying, “You cannot continue praying and at the same time continue sinning!”, from then on I understood God wanted me to repent for my sins.
Even if you fall may times, you should be very patient and more charitable to your soul, confess again and again.
  1. Pray the Rosary everyday (15 mysteries), and pray even if yourself is saying “not to pray” and even if “NOT praying is the most logical thing in the world”. Do this for 3 months initially (and for the rest of your life) and you will see the difference.
'Rosary is my weapon" says Padre Pio and I agree with him. It really is a weapon against the Devil.

Good luck and May the Love Mercy of the Lord and Blessed Mother Mary be upon your soul.
  • A Slave of Christ Thru Mary
  • Delivered from the Power of the Satan and Sinfulness by the Power of the Most Holy Rosary.
 
thanks so far for all you have done. I’ll give what you say a go, and I’ll stick with it (I won’t say ‘I’ll do my best’, because that isn’t going to be good enough. In the words of Yoda, “Do or do not. No try.”).

I am feeling distant and nonchalant, where in a sense I don’t care, but I want to. I know what it was like when I cared, and lived that life. It was better then, even if my mind is currently saying no to it. I don’t know why I’m at an all time low, maybe Satan just hates me, but I trust that God will give me what I need to get the job done. For now, I think He has given me you. I’ll pray the Rosary and read the introduction to JP2’s Fides et Ratio (Faith and Reason). I’ll post and tell you how it went.

Thanks all so far. If you have any recommended reading (Scripture or other) or prayers, then please let me know. I want all the help I could get, especially if it gets to the point of pick and choose.
 
I prayed the Rosary, and it felt good. Not spiritual ecstasy, but more at peace and less sad. I even managed to say a prayer of abandonment to God - something I have never done. I also read some extracts from Cardinal Basil Hume’s ‘Mystery of Love’ and that brought a tear to my eye.

I also read the introduction to Fides et Ratio and that helped.

I think what I have been going through is Him teaching me something - to strip away what I think God is, and to show me who God truly is. I also think that, because of me forcing to question everything (often to His face, and also to our Mother’s) is showing me that I should search for Truth. It will be hard, it has been, and I think that all this is showing me that through it all, I’m on the right track.
 
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