I think I might have PPD. Now what?

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jmjZelie

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It hit me hard today. I started wondering why I have been coping so poorly. It is true that the circumstances of my life have been rather extreme over the past year, but daily feeling like a cornered animal looking to escape and white-knuckling it to get through each day is NOT coping. It hit me that maybe this is PPD. But it had never occurred to me that after 5kids I might develop PPD this time around. I checked a few symptom lists and it felt like someone was describing my inner turmoil and sadness as if they could peer into my heart.

I am terrified that if I seek help, the doctor will make me stop breastfeeding my baby. She is only 10 months and she is still nursing a lot. I heard that medication for PPD is often not compatible with breastfeeding.

What do I do now? I feel so stupid that it took me so many months to figure this out and now I don’t know what to do and I am afraid to seek help. Will the doctor report me to CPS for having a PPD diagnosis?
 
It’s great that you’ve identified the possible problem; that’s the first step to a solution! Please see your doctor. Many medications are safe to use while breastfeeding. The very best thing for your baby–and the rest of your family–is a mentally healthy mama! Stay in prayer, and best wishes to you.
 
jmjZelie said:
It hit me hard today. I started wondering why I have been coping so poorly. It is true that the circumstances of my life have been rather extreme over the past year, but daily feeling like a cornered animal looking to escape and white-knuckling it to get through each day is NOT coping. It hit me that maybe this is PPD. But it had never occurred to me that after 5kids I might develop PPD this time around. I checked a few symptom lists and it felt like someone was describing my inner turmoil and sadness as if they could peer into my heart.

I am terrified that if I seek help, the doctor will make me stop breastfeeding my baby. She is only 10 months and she is still nursing a lot. I heard that medication for PPD is often not compatible with breastfeeding.

What do I do now? I feel so stupid that it took me so many months to figure this out and now I don’t know what to do and I am afraid to seek help. Will the doctor report me to CPS for having a PPD diagnosis?
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Just go to your doctor and ask for options. Your doctor sees this exact situation every week and he or she will have some ideas.

Your panic over this is probably also a PPD symptom, too.

I wouldn’t be concerned about your doctor, PPD and CPS. They’d have to report huge numbers of mothers if that were the case.

Just get to the doctor and take it from there.
 
heidi_storage said:
It’s great that you’ve identified the possible problem; that’s the first step to a solution! Please see your doctor. Many medications are safe to use while breastfeeding. The very best thing for your baby–and the rest of your family–is a mentally healthy mama! Stay in prayer, and best wishes to you.
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I do hope that there are some that are safe for breastfeeding. Nursing my baby is one of the few things that i find joyful about motherhood right now. I would hate to lose that connection to my baby.
 
jmjZelie,

If you do in fact have PPD and do not wish to stop breastfeeding, there ARE other treatment options. The first step is to talk to your doctor. Even if she recommends a drug that is contraindicated for breastfeeding moms, there’s still no one forcing you to take it. And you can be forthright with her: “It’s really important to me to continue breastfeeding. What else can I try?”

It’s tough to have a baby, even when you’re an experienced mom. Cheers to you for figuring out what you think might be the problem and wanting to address it.
 
jmjZelie said:
It hit me hard today. I started wondering why I have been coping so poorly. It is true that the circumstances of my life have been rather extreme over the past year, but daily feeling like a cornered animal looking to escape and white-knuckling it to get through each day is NOT coping. It hit me that maybe this is PPD. But it had never occurred to me that after 5kids I might develop PPD this time around. I checked a few symptom lists and it felt like someone was describing my inner turmoil and sadness as if they could peer into my heart.

I am terrified that if I seek help, the doctor will make me stop breastfeeding my baby. She is only 10 months and she is still nursing a lot. I heard that medication for PPD is often not compatible with breastfeeding.

What do I do now? I feel so stupid that it took me so many months to figure this out and now I don’t know what to do and I am afraid to seek help. Will the doctor report me to CPS for having a PPD diagnosis?
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I feel the same way, but I have consulted it with my PCP and he referred me to a psychiatrist, and I’m still thinking I’ll overcome it without going to any doc. I can be 100% wrong and need help, but I just won’t do it. And if it gets worse, I will not regret a thing. Honestly. Maybe I’ll get help much later. :o
 
E_7 said:
I feel the same way, but I have consulted it with my PCP and he referred me to a psychiatrist, and I’m still thinking I’ll overcome it without going to any doc. I can be 100% wrong and need help, but I just won’t do it. And if it gets worse, I will not regret a thing. Honestly. Maybe I’ll get help much later. :o
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Going against the advice of your physician is never a good idea.
You can keep your opinions about child rearing without compromising mental your health.
What good is it if you goof the deep end and someone ELSE raises your child?
Think about it.
God will help you through it, but you have to help yourself as well. Your child deserves a very healthy mama.
Love ya.
 
I get a feeling this thread is on the verge of being locked since PPD is a medical condition.
 
No one is giving medical advice.
It’s prudent to see a physician when you are sick.
 
There are non-medical options for treating PPD as well. I was helped enormously through talk therapy (there are multiple kinds - cognitive behavioral therapy is the most common but there are others.)

Since you have moved recently (IIRC) your doctor would be happy to refer you. You can also ask your pastor for recommendations for solid Catholic therapists or even Google “Catholic/Christian therapist in [your area].” I know for me that was big because my PPD symptoms were really affecting my marriage and I didn’t want someone who was going to promote divorce.

Even if you find the medical route beneficial, I really think counseling is key. I found I had to learn much better to communicate my needs and expectations, and it was going to be unfair to me, my husband, and others in my support network for me to just “pop a pill until I got over it,” which is sometimes the attitude toward “female problems” of all kinds. Yes, chemical imbalances are very real, but learning how to address the situation is a skill you can take with you anytime, anywhere, PPD or no. 👍

You’ll be in my prayers!
 
pianistclare said:
No one is giving medical advice.
It’s prudent to see a physician when you are sick.
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I agree but specifics regarding issues such as the compatibility of medications with breastfeeding, seem to border on medical advice.

Of course I have noticed that some CAF mods are very lax about enforcing this rule. There was a topic on Spirituality in which a poster was stating she was hearing voices, and while most did advise her to see a physician, many stated she should just pray, and someone even recommended she take vitamins! :eek: AFAIK the topic is still open.

However, I have noticed that Zeile Louis is pretty strict about this.
 
Even with PPD (if that is what you have), you are still The Mom! You have authority over yourself and your child. Don’t ever fear that if you seek professional advice you will have to “do as you are told.” No, look at it as getting the help you need in making an informed decision. Your doctor has information that you don’t have that can help you be a happier and healthier mom. If your health or happiness might get better with some medical advice, by all means go and find it.

Doctors who treat postpartum depression will not be unaccustomed to hearing your concerns. They will also know how to eliminate (or, if necessary diagnose and treat) other maladies that look like PPD to a layperson but aren’t. Once they take your history and have a chance to examine you and talk with you, they can describe your situation with you and help you to come to the decision that is the best for you and your family. There is more than one way to treat PPD (not to mention virtually every other malady), so you will almost certainly have several options. Once you have heard their concerns, it will be up to you to weigh whether or not you have an issue that warrants an early end to breastfeeding, but that will be between you and your physicians.

My mother kind of laughed when the doctor told her this with her seven kids at home, but her doctor told her to figure out how to take it easier. She really needed to have taken his advice. Do take care of your health; it has to last you for the rest of your life! When she was 81, she was still coping with the stresses she put on herself in her 30s and 40s. That was her decision to make, too, but just don’t think you’re made of iron when you make your decision, OK?

Ask for the guidance of St. Gianna Beretta Molla, too. She was a wife, mother, and pediatrician. I have no doubt that she will intercede powerfully on your behalf and be your spiritual friend whenever you have contact with the medical profession.
 
ToeInTheWater said:
I agree but specifics regarding issues such as the compatibility of medications with breastfeeding, seem to border on medical advice.

Of course I have noticed that some CAF mods are very lax about enforcing this rule. There was a topic on Spirituality in which a poster was stating she was hearing voices, and while most did advise her to see a physician, many stated she should just pray, and someone even recommended she take vitamins! :eek: AFAIK the topic is still open.

However, I have noticed that Zeile Louis is pretty strict about this.
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The thread is about fear, not PPD per se.
:rolleyes:
 
pianistclare said:
Going against the advice of your physician is never a good idea.
You can keep your opinions about child rearing without compromising mental your health.
What good is it if you goof the deep end and someone ELSE raises your child?
Think about it.
God will help you through it, but you have to help yourself as well. Your child deserves a very healthy mama.
Love ya.
Click to expand...
I absolutely agree with this advice. My biggest regret is holding to rigid ideals and forsaking medical advice on things. In hindsight it harmed my experience of motherhood far more than enhanced it.
 
jmjZelie said:
It hit me hard today. I started wondering why I have been coping so poorly. It is true that the circumstances of my life have been rather extreme over the past year, but daily feeling like a cornered animal looking to escape and white-knuckling it to get through each day is NOT coping. It hit me that maybe this is PPD. But it had never occurred to me that after 5kids I might develop PPD this time around. I checked a few symptom lists and it felt like someone was describing my inner turmoil and sadness as if they could peer into my heart.

I am terrified that if I seek help, the doctor will make me stop breastfeeding my baby. She is only 10 months and she is still nursing a lot. I heard that medication for PPD is often not compatible with breastfeeding.

What do I do now? I feel so stupid that it took me so many months to figure this out and now I don’t know what to do and I am afraid to seek help. Will the doctor report me to CPS for having a PPD diagnosis?
Click to expand...
When my youngest was only six months old, I had to stop breast feeding due to an infection that required heavy antibiotics.

I was really upset at the time, but I had to take care of my problem. It happens sometimes but the little ones adjust and we do too. 🙂
 
pensmama87 said:
There are non-medical options for treating PPD as well. I was helped enormously through talk therapy (there are multiple kinds - cognitive behavioral therapy is the most common but there are others.)

Since you have moved recently (IIRC) your doctor would be happy to refer you. You can also ask your pastor for recommendations for solid Catholic therapists or even Google “Catholic/Christian therapist in [your area].” I know for me that was big because my PPD symptoms were really affecting my marriage and I didn’t want someone who was going to promote divorce.

Even if you find the medical route beneficial, I really think counseling is key. I found I had to learn much better to communicate my needs and expectations, and it was going to be unfair to me, my husband, and others in my support network for me to just “pop a pill until I got over it,” which is sometimes the attitude toward “female problems” of all kinds. Yes, chemical imbalances are very real, but learning how to address the situation is a skill you can take with you anytime, anywhere, PPD or no. 👍

You’ll be in my prayers!
Click to expand...
Yes, and some changes in lifestyle may also be very helpful–more help, more outings, more social contacts, etc.

It’s a funny thing, a lot of people in the US think nothing of $100 medical bill, but $100 in help (babysitter, cleaner, etc.) is somehow an extravagance.

Depression is an epidemic among US SAHMs.

metroparent.com/daily/parenting/parenting-issues-tips/stay-home-moms-depressed-angry-sad-study-says/
 
Your local La Leche League may be able to help, too. They may have members who have been through this, or advice about doctors.

I hope everything goes well!
 
pianistclare said:
Going against the advice of your physician is never a good idea.
You can keep your opinions about child rearing without compromising mental your health.
What good is it if you goof the deep end and someone ELSE raises your child?
Think about it.
God will help you through it, but you have to help yourself as well. Your child deserves a very healthy mama.
Love ya.
Click to expand...
You are always right. I believe , like the OP, that it is more about fear of going .And also about depending too much on my husband and what he says.
 
E_7 said:
You are always right. I believe , like the OP, that it is more about fear of going .And also about depending too much on my husband and what he says.
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Well, your husband loves you. If you say "honey…I need this. For me. For our baby. Please try to understand, I’m sure he will come around. He’s afraid too, you know.
God bless you dear one.
 
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