I think I offended/hurt by wearing my 10-week-old baby feet antiabortion pin

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Miraluna

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I recently have become involved with our Coalition for Life by standing and praying at Planned Parenthood and doing side-walk counseling. I feel very drawn to this cause. I feel that God called me to it…to be faithful in this way. I was looking for spiritual growth and I felt that God was telling me that I needed to step outside of my safety net (just volunteering in my Church) and forget myself and really put myself out there for others.

I at times will wear my 10-week-old baby feet pin. Today, I wore my pin. I was going to attend a social event. There is a family that was there which supported their daughter’s abortion years ago. And they confided in me about that and told me how heavy their hearts were and how it had affected them. I knew the family would be there, but the pin and abortion thoughts did not come to my mind until I saw them. I greeted the family and I noticed that they noticed my pin. I kept trying to position myself and carry my son so as to not be obvious about the pin. I thought to take it off, but that would have been more awkward. I wonder what they thought or felt. Did I hurt them or offend? They do not support abortion. But was I wrong in wearing the pin around them. I also wear my pin, occasionally, when I teach. I teach at a university and I would think that some students would have views or feelings about my pin. Is it possible that the pin would cause some pain…and if so, then should I refrain from wearing? I think the purpose of the pin is to bring awareness. The intent is to show how humanly complete (and spirit-filled) a baby is even at the tender age of 10-weeks. One would hope the pin to serve as witness and deterrence. But what if it causes pain to some (especially those that have repentant and are much grieved by the experience). What is the right thing to do?

If the precious feet pin can possibly save a life…maybe, that is all that should matter?
 
Miranda,

Your compassion and charity shows. Yours is a sensitive consideration.

I don’t know the answer. The bumper sticker on our van says “As a former Fetus I Oppose Abortion.” Last year, when my husband and I were on a fairly long line at the coffee drive through window, a young woman banged on the side of our car with her fist.

She was behind us in line and became incensed at my sticker. I opened the window and she was saying her mother had her when she was 17. they’d always been poor. it wasn’t fair to her mother. and what did i know about it? how dare i be so judgmental?

i told her my oldest was born when i was 17. i told her we were poor. i was still glad to have him.

she told me her mother wasn’t glad to have her.

i told her we were glad she was here, alive, able to erxpress her opinions and feelings. my husband and i told her we were glad she was alive.

she was furious. what did we know about it anyway? she got back in her car and drove away.

we were very upset. we prayed hail marys for her right there in the van. we wondered if she herself wasn’t post abortive.

the bumper sticker is still on the van. but mostly because we never reached any conclusion about whether it’s insensitive or not.

i don’t know what’s the best way to go on this, either.

i’ll be watching for answers, too.
 
monicatholic said:
Miranda,

Your compassion and charity shows. Yours is a sensitive consideration.

I don’t know the answer. The bumper sticker on our van says “As a former Fetus I Oppose Abortion.” Last year, when my husband and I were on a fairly long line at the coffee drive through window, a young woman banged on the side of our car with her fist.

She was behind us in line and became incensed at my sticker. I opened the window and she was saying her mother had her when she was 17. they’d always been poor. it wasn’t fair to her mother. and what did i know about it? how dare i be so judgmental?

i told her my oldest was born when i was 17. i told her we were poor. i was still glad to have him.

she told me her mother wasn’t glad to have her.

i told her we were glad she was here, alive, able to erxpress her opinions and feelings. my husband and i told her we were glad she was alive.

she was furious. what did we know about it anyway? she got back in her car and drove away.

we were very upset. we prayed hail marys for her right there in the van. we wondered if she herself wasn’t post abortive.

the bumper sticker is still on the van. but mostly because we never reached any conclusion about whether it’s insensitive or not.

i don’t know what’s the best way to go on this, either.

i’ll be watching for answers, too.
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One very good thing came out of your anti-abortion sticker. That poor girl who was so injured by her mother’s lack of love and welcome, at last was prayed for fervently by you and your husband. My dear, perhaps in her whole life no one ever prayed for her before. You cannot know what graces trickled into her wounded life through your prayers.

In a way this experience was a gift to you and your husband, because the Lord who loves her cried out in His anguish that there are mothers who don’t want and don’t love, and maim their children by this lack of love, and He wishes you to pray for these people.

Bless you, Trishie
 
Dear Miraluna, any action that you take in support of life, whether standing and praying at Planned Parenthood and doing side-walk counseling, or wearing your pin, has the potential to elicit hurt or anger in others. You can’t become paralysed because of this possibility. If you manage by God’s grace and your efforts even just to save a single child!!!

As you feel called to this ministry, you accept to take the risks that are involved, just as Jesus did. People were in fact hurt along the way of Jesus’ life, from the very beginning of His life on earth. A townful of infants 2 years old and under were slaughtered in Herod’s attempt to murder the infant Jesus. I can’t imagine how he felt, how Mary felt, when they returned from their time as refugees in Egypt to be told of the slaughter.

The couple you speak of may have been hurt, may have been insensed, or simply accepted the fact that you are Catholic, so naturally expect you to be Pro-life, and even if there is any regret about a lost grandchild, they may still be overwhelmingly convinced they did the right thing for their daughter.

With love and gratitude for your support of our tiny sisters and brthers,

Trishie
 
God’s love for His little ones. How God values each one…

“By the mouths of children, you have made sure of praise.” [Psalm 8:2] “You have trained children and babies to offer perfect praise.” [Matthew 21:16]

“See that you never despise any of these little ones, for I tell you that their angels in heaven are continually in the presence of my Father in heaven.” [Matthew 18:10]

Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me; do not stop them; for it is to such as these that the kingdom of heaven belongs. I tell you solemnly, anyone who does not welcome the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it.” Then He put His arms around them, laid His hands on them and gave them His blessing.” [Mark 10:14-16]

“The disciples came to Jesus and said, “Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?’ So He called a little child to him and set him in front of them. Then He said, ‘I tell you solemnly, unless you change and become like little children you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. And so, the one who makes himself as little as this little child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.’” [Matthew 18:1-4]

“Jesus exclaimed, ‘I bless You, Father, Lord of heaven and of earth, for hiding these things from the learned and clever and revealing them to mere children. Yes, Father, for that is what it pleased You to do.” [Matthew 11:25-26]

“Anyone who welcomes a little child like this in my name welcomes Me. But anyone who is an obstacle to bring down one of these little ones who have faith in me would be better drowned in the depths of the sea with a great millstone around his neck.” [Matthew 18:5-7]
 
I teach at a university and I would think that some students would have views or feelings about my pin. Is it possible that the pin would cause some pain…
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Is it possible the pin might cause a young girl to come to you, when she is considering an abortion?

Is it possible the pin might cause someone to come to you after they’ve had one and are feeling guilty or confused?

Is it possible you might surprise someone with the fact that a ten week old has such human features?

Is it possible the pin might strengthen a student’s waning resolve in the Pro-Life movement?
Did I hurt them or offend?
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Possibly.

Did you make them remember their lost grandson and perhaps have them pray for him?

Did you strengthen their resolve to be as pro-life as this woman who wears this pin, so that when such an occurance happens in the future, the baby is saved?

Did you make them feel contrition, and have them repent of their sin?

Did you make them realize their is somebody they know who might be able to help them with unresolved feelings they have surrounding the issue?

Miraluna, we don’t know other people’s feelings. We do know that if we are walking by the grace of God that He will provide us with oppertunities to preach His word and will, and to do His work. We don’t know what these other people’s feelings towards this might be.

We know Christ’s feelings about it.

Who’s matters? Who are we striving to imitate? Who quietly went about doing good and caring for others, let others know He was there for them, cared for the lost and spoke out against abuse of the downtrodden?

Let the world know you’re their for them. You care, and you’re not there to judge. That’s what that pin is saying if the people are listening to it, and those who are not? Eh, they’re usually too bitter to hear anything other than what they’re making themselves hear. If that pin saves the life of juse one unborn child it is worth all the rage thrown at you by others, IMO.
 
In my experience, people become enraged because their conscience has been pricked. You didn’t hurt these people by wearing your pin. Their sin has hurt them. If they are now prolife, they also will not want people to do as they have done and would be thankful for anyone trying to stop another person from the horrors of abortion. We all have to be sensitive to others as well as being charitable. How is it charitable to the unborn if we always worry we have offended those that have killed them. Those baby feet make me cry each time I see them because I have miscarried a son that was 14 weeks. I still am thankful each time I see them.
 
I was talking to a woman in our larger homeschool group a couple of years ago. She told this story:

The week before, she was standing in her driveway when a young woman with a stroller walked very purposely up to her. The woman said, “excuse me, but I wanted you to know that this baby is alive because of you.”

My acquaintance was confused. She had never talked to this woman before.

The young mom continued, “A year ago I was going to get an abortion and I was walking through the neighborhood thinking about it. When I passed your driveway, I saw your bumper sticker that said, ‘Abortion stops a beating heart.’ I was so struck by the thought that I cancelled my appointment.Thank you.”

True story.
 
Your compassion for the people you come in contact while wearing the pin is just wonderful. It has been my experience, while wearing my pin at work (right next to my law enforcement badge) that the only people who get ‘offended’ are those who believe in embracing choice and diversity only if it is the choice they want you to make and only if the diversity is that which meshes with the way they think. The others may ask a question, may even disagree but they are never offended.

And, like others, I found myself confronted by an angry woman who got in my face and told me I did not know what I was talking about and had no experience with this part of life.

I asked her one question. “How do you know that by looking at me?”.

She was so startled, she shut up and walked away. Six months later she came to me and asked me some quieter questions. I was able to share more intimately with her. Today she is in RCIA…after attending a Rachel’s Vineyard Retreat.

God is good…
 
I agree with every post here. Some so beautiful, I might cry all morning!

I want only to add that you truly have no idea what people think when they see your pin, except in the cases where they actually come up and tell you. I used to be offended by the bumper stickers that say, “Say One Hail Mary” – even though I’ve always been a Catholic!! But guess what – a few years of maturity and confession and now I say more like 3 or 4 when I see those stickers. Being confronted with things that we dislike gives us the opportunity to grow in graces and love. So, keep confronting folks, and know that, as a PP said, Jesus’ whole ministry was about preaching the things people did not want to hear. You might be saying something uncomfortable with your pin, but it could be the best thing for that person to hear, whether they want to or not!!

God Bless You!
 
First, let me thank you for your commitment to the unborn. I was just talking about purchasing a precious feet pin myself with my husband. I think I will order a whole mess of them and keep them on hand to give to others who ask about the pin.

Do not remove the pin because it could cause pain to someone. A lot of things cause pain to people and we cannot stop everything just to consider someone’s feelings. If someone who has had an abortion feels badly and regrets the decision, this is a clear sign for others to learn that abortion has many victims and the pain is an enduring one. If it angers someone, it is because those little feet remind them of bad decisions they made themselves. If you would like, have Rachel’s vineyard information handy in your purse or car to pass along to them. Millions of women regret their abortions and can remain silent no more. Think of the domino effect that little 3/8" pin can have. Will those people who are hurt and angry tell a friend or relative why they are upset? Perhaps they will when asked and then another individual will be better educated of the hurt abortion causes.

I was thinking of things that hurt people when they see them - a woman unable to conceive hurts when she sees a newborn - is a good example and one which happens everyday. Should we carry our children around fully covered from head to toe in a blanket because the little one will remind someone of a hurt or keep them in the house at all times? No, of course that is silly. If you offend someone by wearing those precious feet, it is because you struck a nerve - one which needed to be struck.

Keep it up - God blesses everyone immeasurably who is unafraid to fight for the babies.

Peace be with you,

Kelly
 
leonie said:
I was talking to a woman in our larger homeschool group a couple of years ago. She told this story:

The week before, she was standing in her driveway when a young woman with a stroller walked very purposely up to her. The woman said, “excuse me, but I wanted you to know that this baby is alive because of you.”

My acquaintance was confused. She had never talked to this woman before.

The young mom continued, “A year ago I was going to get an abortion and I was walking through the neighborhood thinking about it. When I passed your driveway, I saw your bumper sticker that said, ‘Abortion stops a beating heart.’ I was so struck by the thought that I cancelled my appointment.Thank you.”

True story.
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:crying::extrahappy::extrahappy::extrahappy::blushing:

Praise GOD!
 
I’d just like to add this…

Many folks may not realize what the pin is.You know,we know but maybe they do not…I see people with pins and badges and different colored “ribbons” and sometimes have absolutely no idea what they stand for.

And as a side note: I have many Catholic t-shirts and wear them often.One has the Divine Mercy image of Jesus on the front with “have mercy on us and on the whole world” written on the back. I’ve never encountered hostility… on the contrary many folks ask questions or tell me their “story” and overall it’s a positive experience.
 
I’m pretty sure the couple in question is reminded about their decision to support their daughter’s abortion every single time they see a baby. If your pin did remind them of their past decision, I’m sure it wasn’t the only thing to do so.
 
monicatholic said:
Miranda,

Your compassion and charity shows. Yours is a sensitive consideration.

I don’t know the answer. The bumper sticker on our van says “As a former Fetus I Oppose Abortion.” Last year, when my husband and I were on a fairly long line at the coffee drive through window, a young woman banged on the side of our car with her fist.

She was behind us in line and became incensed at my sticker. I opened the window and she was saying her mother had her when she was 17. they’d always been poor. it wasn’t fair to her mother. and what did i know about it? how dare i be so judgmental?

i told her my oldest was born when i was 17. i told her we were poor. i was still glad to have him.
**
she told me her mother wasn’t glad to have her. **
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That poor young woman! If that’s true, I can’t imagine the pain of knowing your mom didn’t want you.
 
The goosebumps on my arms and neck from this post. . . you guys with your true stories. . . wow, am I honored to be graced with your witnesses.

❤️
 
monicatholic said:
Miranda,

Your compassion and charity shows. Yours is a sensitive consideration.

I don’t know the answer. The bumper sticker on our van says “As a former Fetus I Oppose Abortion.” Last year, when my husband and I were on a fairly long line at the coffee drive through window, a young woman banged on the side of our car with her fist.

She was behind us in line and became incensed at my sticker. I opened the window and she was saying her mother had her when she was 17. they’d always been poor. it wasn’t fair to her mother. and what did i know about it? how dare i be so judgmental?

i told her my oldest was born when i was 17. i told her we were poor. i was still glad to have him.

she told me her mother wasn’t glad to have her.

i told her we were glad she was here, alive, able to erxpress her opinions and feelings. my husband and i told her we were glad she was alive.

she was furious. what did we know about it anyway? she got back in her car and drove away.

we were very upset. we prayed hail marys for her right there in the van. we wondered if she herself wasn’t post abortive.

the bumper sticker is still on the van. but mostly because we never reached any conclusion about whether it’s insensitive or not.

i don’t know what’s the best way to go on this, either.

i’ll be watching for answers, too.
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Fron what you said I think it is fair to consider that this person has probably held in these feelings of guilt for a long time. Is there a chance this girl was raised thinking that her mother would have prefered her to be dead? You may have provided her the opportunity to vent. Afterwards I believe there is a good chance that it will sink in and she will remember that you and your husband said you were glad she was alive; probably something she heard less than she should have growing up.
 
I think all these responses are just more confirmation of all the pain that accompanies abortion~no matter if people claim it is a right or a choice. I think this makes your response to people who approach you about the pin all the more important. If you respond with gentleness and compassion…you will quell and or deflect those who are aggressive. If you get angry or defensive, people approaching you in anger will escalate their emotions.

You sound like someone with a great heart…please continue to share it lovingly with those you encounter because of the pin you wear. The pin is not the problem…expediency and ignorance are.
 
leonie said:
I was talking to a woman in our larger homeschool group a couple of years ago. She told this story:

The week before, she was standing in her driveway when a young woman with a stroller walked very purposely up to her. The woman said, “excuse me, but I wanted you to know that this baby is alive because of you.”

My acquaintance was confused. She had never talked to this woman before.

The young mom continued, “A year ago I was going to get an abortion and I was walking through the neighborhood thinking about it. When I passed your driveway, I saw your bumper sticker that said, ‘Abortion stops a beating heart.’ I was so struck by the thought that I cancelled my appointment.Thank you.”

True story.
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That is an awesome story. For every one of these stories there are many many more that go unkown…

I don’t think it is insensitive to wear the tiny feet, or have bumper stickers etc. There is a difference between promoting the culture of life and purposefully/uncharitably reminding someone of their past abortion (in a holier than thou spirit). As long as it is not done for the latter reason, I think it is wonderful that you are promoting the culture of life in this world where people are often bombarded with just the opposite.
 
Island_Oak said:
I think all these responses are just more confirmation of all the pain that accompanies abortion~no matter if people claim it is a right or a choice. I think this makes your response to people who approach you about the pin all the more important. If you respond with gentleness and compassion…you will quell and or deflect those who are aggressive. If you get angry or defensive, people approaching you in anger will escalate their emotions.

You sound like someone with a great heart…please continue to share it lovingly with those you encounter because of the pin you wear. The pin is not the problem…expediency and ignorance are.
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I agree… This reminds me of one year when we (a large college pro life group) put up the little white crosses in our college campus lawn near the anniversary of Roe vs Wade. We had permission to do it, but a small group of people kept coming to kick all the crosses out of the ground. It was crazy, I had never seen people act like that. We ended up having to call the police. Abortion is a sensitive issue that might elicit some very emotional and crazy responses in people. This does not mean we should stop doing what we can to promote the culture of life, but we do need to be careful.
 
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