I think I'm pregnant again

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I am so darn angry and frustrated. My husband and I had such a difficult time with accepting and practicing NFP. He was so angry and difficult to live with. Finally, I insisted on counseling with a holy priest, or there would be no more “marriage” to speak of. He relented, and (nearly) immediately came back a different man.
Anyway, for four months it’s gone so well, and he’s been so patient and we’ve been so careful, and now I fear with all of my heart that I am pregnant again.
I am four days late, and I took a test. The ‘positive’ sign was…barely…visible, although he says no. He thinks it was more visible, as the marks on a digital clock are visible if you hold them to a certain light, even if those marks are not truly illuminated.
I’m flipping out.
We have eight children and I really cannot bear the thought of more. Like many of you, I work so hard day in and day out just to keep things from falling into chaos. My husband travels and there is just too much to do over the course of a day to add more.
Tragically, a local family just lost a child, and it’s the second child they’ve lost. When I heard the news I said to God, “any cross but that”. Well, here I am ready to reject something that is nowhere near as heavy, and brings great joy.
Why is my will never, ever in line with God’s Will?
Please pray that I am not pregnant, but if I am, that I do not crack up.
 
Pray more, worry less.

It sounds like HORRIBLE advice but you really can’t waste time worrying about the what-if’s.

No matter what happens, you are already really blessed. If there is no child, there are no worries. IF there is a child on the way then it will give the whole family a chance to love that much more.

I’ll be praying that everything works out for you and your family.
 
Are you taking your temperature daily? If so, has it dropped? If it has, I can tell you with almost 100% certainty that you are not pregnant, you just may be having a long cycle. If you’ve only been using NFP for 4 months, it’s likely you’re just not used to your own rhythms yet.

In the words of Padre Pio “Hope, Pray, and Don’t Worry!!”
 
My prayer for your strength especially as you already have 8 children. As one of nine children, I know how challenging things can be.

My prayers for you and for your husband as given his feelings, you are probably very afraid of his reaction if you are pregnant as he already has been angry about not wanting more children. I remember our mother crying often with her last pregnancy, at which point she died with pulmonary embolism, aged 43, leaving nine children ranging down to four years old.
For this reason I pray most sincerely for your health and well-being. I know that easy answers cannot address the day to day challenges that you face.

May God help you both emotionally and financially in the difficult realities of raising a large family.
May God help your marriage during this time of turmoil, and may God give peace to your children.
I ask God to bless your husband and you with mental and emotional health in the challenges you face on many levels.

Mother Mary I ask your most powerful intercession for this mother and father and for each of their children.

In your probably stretched financial situation I’m sure you would not be required to donate, but here is a link to have your prayer request placed at the Grotto of Lourdes

prayerrequest.eu/
 
I know how you feel when you say “you work so hard just to keep things from falling into chaos,” as my wife and I have felt SO many times in our 22 years of marriage and six children. Other factors beyond our children contributed to our having difficult times. As we have liked to say, we not only have a poverty of money, but moreso a poverty of TIME, with both of us working hard with hardly any breaks.

It would be highly unusual if you’re pregnant if you’re taking the careful NFP route (as opposed to skimping on the rules a little here and there as we sometimes have). It’s been fail-proof for us when we haven’t done any skimping (we had a surprise child when we did skimp just a bit), and statistically it is more reliable than all contraceptives, save sterilization. But it isn’t 100% full-proof, just as contraceptives aren’t either. So I wouldn’t blame NFP as a method.

But, if you are pregnant, I believe God will supply the graces needed for the situation. Depend on Him, and he won’t let you down, but will give you a deeper faith and peace in your life in general. Also, keep in mind that unplanned children end up being cherished by good parents like yourself. If there is a child in you, he or she will one day be graduating from kindergarten, high school, and other life milestones, and like us, with our one big surprise (who arrived at a most inopportune time!), you will be grateful to God for the existence of this precious child.

We offered your situation up in our family rosary tonight, and we will continue to pray for you and your husband.
 
exiled said:
Why is my will never, ever in line with God’s Will?
Please pray that I am not pregnant, but if I am, that I do not crack up.
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The best advice I can give you is to just be more careful and think about things with more cautious. Good luck. Blesings.🙂
 
Oh, sweetie! My heart aches for you. Sounds like you were being careful and you’re trying your best to be a good wife, mom, and a godly woman.

I don’t have anything to say. I feel like any advice would seem trite or condescending.

I’ll keep you in prayers. Know you have my support, even though it’s virtual. :hug1:
 
Wow, eight kids…you really do have your hands full. I hope you start your cycle soon, but if you don’t, I will pray that God gives you strength.
 
Thank you all so much for your encouragement and understanding, especially the PM; what kindness!
Still waiting for my period. For the women, may I ask, we were violently ill last week, right when I was due. I was so sick for about 36 hours with no food/water. In theory, I’m sure it could be said that this could’ve affected my cycle, but I’d like to know if anyone *actually *has experienced lengthy delays after illness. Lastly, I’m in my 40’s, so I’m wondering if I have a perfect storm of irregular period with sickness, etc.
I just can’t wait to start!
 
exiled said:
Thank you all so much for your encouragement and understanding, especially the PM; what kindness!
Still waiting for my period. For the women, may I ask, we were violently ill last week, right when I was due. I was so sick for about 36 hours with no food/water. In theory, I’m sure it could be said that this could’ve affected my cycle, but I’d like to know if anyone *actually *has experienced lengthy delays after illness. Lastly, I’m in my 40’s, so I’m wondering if I have a perfect storm of irregular period with sickness, etc.
I just can’t wait to start!
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not to give you false hope but your age and illness can cause delays or (long) cycles. but usally my long cycles from illness were only affected if I was sick in the first half or pre ovulatory phase 1 part of the cycle. the post ovulatory or phase 3 shouldn’t be affected by illness (1 week normally is phase 3 or post ovulatory). but phase 3 can be affected by age. if you saw two lines even if they were fant its likly its a positive. most of my pregnancy test have had fant postitives when pregnant. the 5 day early pregnancy test are more sensitive. I will pray that if you are God gives you the graces you need to accept his Holy will with love. I remember your Nov post we have similar fears. I have been praying that I do God’s will joyfully. I’ll pray for you too.
 
Rita77 said:
not to give you false hope but your age and illness can cause delays or (long) cycles. but usally my long cycles from illness were only affected if I was sick in the first half or pre ovulatory phase 1 part of the cycle. the post ovulatory or phase 3 shouldn’t be affected by illness (1 week normally is phase 3 or post ovulatory). but phase 3 can be affected by age. if you saw two lines even if they were fant its likly its a positive. most of my pregnancy test have had fant postitives when pregnant. the 5 day early pregnancy test are more sensitive. I will pray that if you are God gives you the graces you need to accept his Holy will with love. I remember your Nov post we have similar fears. I have been praying that I do God’s will joyfully. I’ll pray for you too.
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I agree with what you’re saying. When I took an at home pregnancy test, the first positive I got was very faint. It was so faint that I didn’t even notice it and discarded it as a negative. It wasn’t until I took another one that was still faint, although a little darker, that I decided to go back and look at the previous one only to notice that it too was positive. And now I’m 26 weeks. So it seems true what they say, a faint positive is still a positive. I also used the First Response tests that tell 5 days sooner because they’re more sensitive.

To the OP, I pray that you accept God’s will, whatever it may be and that things work out for you and your family.
 
This one i for you : lifesitenews.com/news/why-i-never-should-have-had-eight-children/

Never, ever let the Devil, the prince of hate and death, fill you with anxiety and despair , especially not when dealing with the great gift of life from Life and Love Himself!.

I’ve been there, it is unbelievable how much the devil can torment a woman upon finding out that she is pregnant! Cast him away and invoke Jesus’ love and peace instead. I love how this woman did it ! I personally just said: Jesus, I choose YOU!

Trust and hope!
 
1inICXC said:
This one i for you : lifesitenews.com/news/why-i-never-should-have-had-eight-children/

Never, ever let the Devil, the prince of hate and death, fill you with anxiety and despair , especially not when dealing with the great gift of life from Life and Love Himself!.

I’ve been there, it is unbelievable how much the devil can torment a woman upon finding out that she is pregnant! Cast him away and invoke Jesus’ love and peace instead. I love how this woman did it ! I personally just said: Jesus, I choose YOU!

Trust and hope!
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I love this article.

To the OP- I am mom of just five, but it seems to me that God knows you can rise to the challenge and respond generously to this gift, should you really be pregnant.

I hope you can find that generosity and that you can figure out another (moral) way to approach postponing more pregnancies if that is truly what you need to do.
 
kristacecilia said:
I love this article.

To the OP- I am mom of just five, but it seems to me that God knows you can rise to the challenge and respond generously to this gift, should you really be pregnant.

I hope you can find that generosity and that you can figure out another (moral) way to approach postponing more pregnancies if that is truly what you need to do.
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Man, I love this forum. Where else can I read a sentence like the one I highlighted in your post…“A mom of JUST five!” It’s so inspiring in these days of single children and when a “large” family is 3 kids!

👍
 
i pray that you can gracefully accept God’s will, whatever that may be.
 
I feel you sister, I don’t have 8 children but I have twins who are almost 3, and a 16 month old and I am 27. I practie ALOT of abstinance because of our financial siutation and my mental state, (depression/anxiety issues). It’s not complete and total absintance since, that is very hard being married, but it is pretty close lol. Althought lately I have been wanting another baby, and I am not quite sure why, since I am totally exhausted every day. Anyways, hold old are all your children? Have you considered trying to abstain temporarily? The point of using NFP for is for grave reasons, and it sounds like you have grave reasons to use it, but the thing is when you practice NFP you have to be open to life, and I am not sure but it sounds like neither you or your husband truly are. The reason I say that is because when I read your post you sounded like me 6 months ago. I choose to abtain right now and so does me husband because neither of us at that time were truly open to life, so practicing NFP would not be the right decision for us. Do you have family members that help out at all?
 
Hi Roxy,
I took another test this morning and it’s ‘arguably’ a positive. At this point I have resigned myself, and, while I’m not thrilled, I am grateful that if this is my cross then it’s awfully small compared to others’.
My husband is upset because of the financial impact. He makes an excellent living, but where we live demands private schools because public are unacceptable. I homeschool until high school, but next year we’ll have two in private high school and one in college.
Many have done this with less, so we’ll figure it out and reprioritize what we have to.

Now to find a way to deal with the constant uneasiness in the tummy (without gaining 75 lbs.) that is sure to come any day now.
 
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