I think my sister is in a toxic relationship?

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I’m sorry that you are witnessing this.

My sister has had a series of very bad relationships. She will not take my advice about anything (which is partially my fault for being overbearing when we were younger and partially her headstrong personality, which for some reason shows up in every aspect of her life except when it comes to men treating her badly). I’ve learned I have to keep my distance and pray from afar, because any attempt I make to get her to see what’s right in front of her face will backfire.

If you can “be there” for your sister, I’d advise checking in with her and asking “how are you?” and really meaning it. Show her what a caring relationship is so she knows if and when she wakes up to the reality with this guy that she knows she can come to you.
 
Thank you pensmama87 for your advice.

I’m really sorry about your sister. God grant she will realize soon that the relationship isn’t healthy and will definitely leave it and find a man who will really love her…

I do try to let my sister know that I’m there for her, but am worried she won’t realize until after they are married and maybe have children, or not at all. We’ve been very close, but I see less of her now. I don’t know if she mentioned to her fiance that I have doubts about him, because I did try to open her eyes a couple of times. It’s like she lives in a bubble with the relationship, and if you’re in a bubble, you don’t get to see from another perspective, I think.
 
It is better to encourage her to deal constructively but firmly with inappropriate behaviors, rather than attacking persons. Manipulative people will pull the self-pity card faster than you can blink, so do not push your sister in the direction of an us-vs-them storyline with this guy.
 
I am sorry to hear your sister is in such a relationship. I will pray that she will see how unhealthy it is and decide to end it before things become more serious.

My prayers are with her for her safety and well being.

Mary.
 
pensmama87 said:
…headstrong personality, which for some reason shows up in every aspect of her life except when it comes to men treating her badly…
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What a recipe for disaster that is. I wish it were rare. (You see it with guys, too. Why is that? 🤷)
 
Feel free to PM me if you don’t want to talk openly on the Forums.
 
EasterJoy said:
What a recipe for disaster that is. I wish it were rare. (You see it with guys, too. Why is that? 🤷)
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You bet.

Sometimes I think it’s just that she so desperately wants to be able to let down her guard around somebody, and the nasty guys she ends up with are really good at making her feel like a princess - at first.

But she could be a lot more trusting around us, and then maybe she wouldn’t be so exhausted when it comes to other relationships. She really, really wants a white knight in shining armor and is big into fairy tale romance.
 
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