I want my anxiety and worriness to stop controlling my life

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perpetua2017

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Hello,
I need some advice. I am having some anxiety over my job. I am worrying about my age. I look young. My fellow colleagues workers ages are different. I think that some of the women who are married and have children are in there too thirties maybe forties. I can’t tell anymore. I know that a lot of them are in there twenties late twenties. I am forty. A lot of people in their forties feel young and the act like there in their twenties or thirties. I don’t have any children. I just never happened. I lot of people can’t have children. I just feel out of place. I have no confidence. One coworker keeps looking at me and like he’s wondering about my age. I know the law, I have the right to work as a woman I have rights regardeless of my age, sex and gender. I need help. I am not doing anything wrong. I mean I worrying so much because right now I can’t afford a car because I wasn’t working. I have to take the bus and walk to work. I don’t see a problem with that. I mean I see celebrities journalist, the president, comedians and other people on TV especially reality show contestants all older than me and the are just acting like themselves and people Twitter tell them to act their age. I have anxiety this is what cause me not to be able to work and function properly in the real world. I choose not to take medications and be addicted to them. But my anxiety flared up yesterday I think it was due to the weather it was so gloomy outside it looked like it’s going to rain. I was having panic attacks and worrying that I will loose my job because I don’t act like most forty years old. I just want to work,be able to make enough money to pay my bills, to be able to make enough money to take medical billing class and take the test, to have some money for a car and gas money. But I am thinking all this things I my head. I want to be confident. Please help me with some positive thinking. I need to feel comfortable and feel my job is secured.
 
perpetua2017 said:
I choose not to take medications and be addicted to them.
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There are anxiety meds out there that are less addictive. If it’s bad enough to affect your life, it’s bad enough for you to see a psychiatrist and get some help.
 
I’ll say a prayer for you. I’m sorry you are going through this. If you are catholic try going to daily mass it’s helped me in the past when I had troubles at work. I know you are trying to save money, but you may want to talk to professional about this.
 
I am Catholic, but with my anxieties a ND worriness I am struggling with my faith also. I try to pray every day but when I start to pray the anxieties and negative thoughts came inside my head. I just need to have confidence and try to be strong. I don’t like people asking so much about my life and personal life. They don’t understand my struggles and problems. I tried talking to a counselor he told me to take the job because I will be walking to work and working at the Wharehouse will make you walk and exercise and that will make you healthier mentally and physically. Staying at home with no exercise or activity will make you worst, you will be more depress and afraid to overcome your fears. I was so happy getting this job, because I was beingore independent but and finally getting exercise. I started looking weight, eating better. I felt a little confident about myself and attitudr. But yesterday was a really bad day for my mental health I started getting anxious and worrying about everything all these images came into my mind. I know it was the weather it was so gloomy and cold. It affected me emotionally. Plus the are promoting the seasonal workers and making them permanent and I am worried about that I am going to apply, but the rejection affects me. What if I am the only one who doesn’t get promoted. Because of my worriness I forgot to punch my punch card yesterday. This is affecting me. I don’t know what to do.
 
I am not ashamed to admit that there have been times in my life when I have had to take anti-anxiety meds. Coupled with therapy, it made all the difference in the world. When the time came I was able to taper off them with no problems. I never ended up addicted to them.

If anxiety is making it difficult for you to operate on a day to day basis, you need to see someone ASAP.
 
For myself if I were experiencing some of these anxieties at that age I would have hormone levels checked.Some of those symptoms snowballed some time back for me with peri and that’s exactly what I did.
Praying life settles down again for you soon,and that you can find peace in praying also .God bless.
 
1st) Slow Down. Take a deep breath.

2nd) What the heck will you be like at age 50 ?

3rd) NO ONE’S job is secure.
 
Consider seeing a hypnotherapist. My insurance paid for the visits. I saw my therapist because I was not sleeping well due to anxiety and I did like how the poorly working meds made me feel. It has been a few years, but I think we had four or five sessions to see what was bothering me and get my history. The last session was a “hypnosis” where I got comfortable and the therapist spoke to me and gave me coping mechanisms. When I left, I had a CD I could play whenever I needed it. It worked very well.

I also saw the therapist to treat high blood pressure. They also treat addictions and prepare mothers for natural childbirth.
 
You need to talk to your therapist and follow their instructions including medication.
 
I am following his advice to control my anxiety by finding a part time job, get exercise, take the bus so I don’t drive at this time due to my anxiety. I try not to take medication due to job I have at the wharehouse, medication will make me drowsy. He said it could be a hormone chemical imbalance. He said to try meditation. But I wonder off from my worrying thoughts and never complete a session of meditation. I will meet him again next week.
 
I talk to my therapist and he said due to the fact I haven’t worked for many years and anxiety from not gave a job for many years and not being in a work setting I had a panic attack at work due to social anxeity and the thoughts in my head is from that. The only way to get over it is to interact and go to work each day and try not to worry about those thoughts. He said you need to think about yourself first taking the bus and walking to work will help me with my anxiety and will provide me with the exercise I need to get in shape. Your Co workers are not thinking about you or putting you first. I don’t know how to deal with them asking questions about my life. Mental illness is hard to talk anybody about. My parents and siblings are in denial about my illness, they tell me not to mention it to people just to keep it to myself. To help with my social anxiety he gave me breathing exercise and told me to relax and take deep breaths. Don’t worry, and he told to be apply for the promotion at my work and if you don’t get it’s okay there will be more opportunities in the future to be promoted. As long as I am doing my best each day, they won’t be upset with my work performance. I can’t believe I had a panic attack. It wasn’t severe, it lasted only a few seconds and I went outside to breath and walk and it stop but thoughts were still there. He said he doesn’t want to give medication due to my job setting. I hope the breathing technique helps me to deal with my social anxiety. Thank you for all the great advice. God Bless You.
 
perpetua2017 said:
I talk to my therapist…
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May I ask whether your therapist is a certified psychiatrist, psychologist or councilor?

I only ask because all of them will take pay to talk to people about their mental challenges but some of them have different and more extensive “tool belts” than others with which to assist you with your challenge.
 
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He is a certified psychologist. I know it’s like some of these therapists are not helpful at all and only want to be paid.
 
A little exercise might help your anxiety. If not talk to your primary physician.
 
I understand that you don’t want to take medication. You need to harness the power of nature!
There are plenty of natural herbs and supplements that can help with anxiety.

Some herbs: passionflower, holy basil, ashwagandha, lemon balm, lavender, Brahmi, chamomile
minerals: magnesium, lithium orotate, zinc
other supplements: l-theanine, glycine, gaba, probiotics.

I take some of these everyday and my anxiety is practically gone with no side effects.
(obviously check with your doctor first before trying these)
 
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I’d check your state laws on that. In many states psychologists can’t prescribe - only psychiatrists can.

And a lot of otherwise well meaning doctors wont get you the help you need because they want to feel like they can do their full body of work unaided.

And by all means, try supplements if you think they’d help.

For many they’re just a waste of money. If you have a neurotransmitter issue, a supplement is like bring a water balloon to put out a high-rise fire.
 
OP, you need to ask yourself if you feel this psychologist is a good fit. if not, it is okay to go to someone else. If your psychologist is male, maybe you might be more comfortable with a female. As another poster pointed out, all states do not allow psychologists to prescribe. Even if yours does, you may need to try a different medication.

A lot of people like to get to know new employees. What you see as asking too many questions, they see as just being friendly. I do not understand your concerns about acting or seeming to act your age is about. My advice is to not care what age people are, it doesnt matter. If people ask you something you are not comfortable answering, one advice columnist says to ask them, “why do you need to know?”
 
I am getting paranoid concerning one of my coworkers he is a junior associate he doesn’t say hello to me, he gives me my work and I think he purposely make some errors to the work so the woman workers have to go to him for help. Thats when we talk. I am glad he doesn’t know my name but he might know it If it’s another junior associate we don’t have to talk to them. Today he was acting really strange. He saw me going outside and he stayed inside and was standing near the gate and staring through the gate outside and looking at me if I was talking to anybody outside when he saw me coming inside he starts to walk in front of me and then he was checking his biceps while I was walking much further away from him. I thinking he might be 28 to 35 years old. He is differently attracted to women and wants all the attention from the women at work. With this me too movement and all those men doing those things to women. You can see I am getting anxiety and paranoid. It can just be all in my head. I only see him three days when I work. All the Spanish speaking women they are married, older than him and they tease him and joke with him and they just give him all the attention he wants. Then why does he want me to give any attention to him, if those women are giving him attention. I mean this is a wharehouse job I am not dress up I am not wearing makeup my hair is in a bun. I am probably look like the less appealing person there. I got sick to my stomach today just being next to him. I think he is waiting for me to tease him like the other women there. He wants me to give him a compliment. I know it’s my anxieties flaring up due to news about all the women being sexually harrass. I don’t know what to do.
 
Honestly, I think your anxieties are getting the best of you. You really need to get professional help for it because some of the things you are mentioning are things you are reading into and not perhaps what they really are.

I also would like to suggest that perhaps this workplace is not the right fit for you. Is there a possibility of you leaving and finding something else more suitable?
 
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