I want to join. Advice? (long post)

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xcaine11

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I want to join the Catholic Church but I need some advice.

My father is a lapsed Catholic and my mother is a Methodist. My father stopped going to church before I was born and as a child I went to Methodist Bible Schools for several summers and attended several Methodist Churches that my mother ended up not committing to. I was never baptized. So I never had any guidance as a child towards a specific faith. I see this as being both good and bad because on one side it has allowed me to figure out what I believe on my own and make my decisions for myself…but on the other side I don’t have any relationship with a specific church.

My grandparents (father’s parents) were devout Catholics and I attended many masses with them. I was very close with my grandparents. My grandparents died when I was 13 and I attended church with them up until their death. The last time I was in a Catholic Church was with them.

I am now 22 and I just graduated from college a couple of weeks ago. I have always wanted to join the Catholic Church because I always liked the Catholic services more than the other churches I attended. It just felt like a good fit for me. Also, the Catholic Church brought me a lot of comfort and security after the passing of my grandparents. I spoke with my grandparent’s priest about life and death numerous times before and after their funeral and it made a huge impact on my life. However, I found it difficult to attend another mass after their passing. But after doing a lot of researching and reading multiple books on Catholicism, I know now that I want to join. Here is my issue:

Without a strong parental influence, it has taken me a long time to decide what to do with my faith. But my decision has definitely not been made in haste. I have thought about it and read, and researched for the past ten years. Now that I have graduated from college, I have the time to commit myself to the process. The only problem is I may be moving away from my current location to attend graduate school this August. Considering my background and being unbaptized, would I have time to join before I re-locate? Is the program set in stone in regard to the months in which baptisms are? Also, if I don’t have enough time, would I be able to continue at another church in another state?

Ideally I would like to join now and be baptized before I leave because I know it would be more difficult to balance joining with graduate studies and if I put it off longer it would be very difficult for me to join after I have permanent employment and I am afraid that I might put it off longer and never go through with it due to future scheduling issues.

Also, I wanted to be as educated and informed as possible before I talk to a priest. Any advice would be appreciated.

Thanks
 
Your situation sounds very similar to my own conversion story. I’ll spare you the details, but know you’re not alone.

In my own case, I emailed the priest at the local church in April, and was confirmed that September. I met with him privately to go through the Catechism. It isn’t ordinary, but it is not out of the question.

My recommendation is to email or call your local parish priest. Do not worry about being uninformed, it is their job to teach the faith.
 
If I were you I would wait until I relocated. Many universities have Newman centers (Catholic student ministry) and they will be a great place for you to come into the Church and be supported spiritually during grad school as well.
 
Archangelic said:
Your situation sounds very similar to my own conversion story. I’ll spare you the details, but know you’re not alone.

In my own case, I emailed the priest at the local church in April, and was confirmed that September. I met with him privately to go through the Catechism. It isn’t ordinary, but it is not out of the question.

My recommendation is to email or call your local parish priest. Do not worry about being uninformed, it is their job to teach the faith.
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Thank you for the advice. I appreciate it. It is reassuring to hear that I am not alone. I will take your advice. Thanks again.
 
My conversion was along similar lines. I was Lutheran, and in 2005, I began a three-year self-study of the Church, the early Fathers, etc. I finally began RCIA in 2008, but work required me to move. I started over in September 2009, but had to “drop out” due to yet another relocation for work. By 2011, I was starting RCIA yet again only to have to — wait for it — relocate for work! Last February, I met extensively twice with the Deacon over the RCIA at the parish I was attending. After an exhaustive discussion with the parish priest, he allowed me to come into the Church by Profession of Faith on February 19. That was the greatest day of my life, hands-down.

My point is this – please do not give up your pursuit. The Holy Spirit led you to the Church, where Christ wants you to receive Him in the Eucharist. Whether in school or working, if you want it, you can make it happen. Practicing law made it difficult sometimes, but I always reminded myself that Christ gave me salvation – I can give up some sleep for Him! My prayers are with you!
 
SuscipeMeDomine said:
If I were you I would wait until I relocated. Many universities have Newman centers (Catholic student ministry) and they will be a great place for you to come into the Church and be supported spiritually during grad school as well.
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This is good to know as well. My only concern with this is that I will be entering a program in August that will be very intense and will consume 6 days a week with very dense readings and many hours spent studying.

I fear that with my busy schedule I would be more likely to neglect my religious studies to focus on academics. Ideally, I would like to utilize this free time I have right now, at least to get started. Because I currently have a very flexible part time job that would allow me to easily devote the majority of my days on the Catholic Church.

Thank you very much for your advice and I will definitely look into the university’s student ministry.
 
trevor1055 said:
My conversion was along similar lines. I was Lutheran, and in 2005, I began a three-year self-study of the Church, the early Fathers, etc. I finally began RCIA in 2008, but work required me to move. I started over in September 2009, but had to “drop out” due to yet another relocation for work. By 2011, I was starting RCIA yet again only to have to — wait for it — relocate for work! Last February, I met extensively twice with the Deacon over the RCIA at the parish I was attending. After an exhaustive discussion with the parish priest, he allowed me to come into the Church by Profession of Faith on February 19. That was the greatest day of my life, hands-down.

My point is this – please do not give up your pursuit. The Holy Spirit led you to the Church, where Christ wants you to receive Him in the Eucharist. Whether in school or working, if you want it, you can make it happen. Practicing law made it difficult sometimes, but I always reminded myself that Christ gave me salvation – I can give up some sleep for Him! My prayers are with you!
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You are absolutely right. Thank you for your (name removed by moderator)ut. I too am pursuing law and I know I have been put on this path at this time for a reason. I am just trying to find the best possible approach.

Thanks again.
 
As a fellow graduate student, I can understand your worry. I began to explore when I working on my undergraduate certifcate. It was hard to research and study but being a student also had its advantages because of the following reasons:
  • I had a Newman centre which was amazing to me. They helped to answer my questions and gave me a safe place to explore if Catholicism was for me. I also did RCIA with them.
  • I also had access to interlibrary loans which I used to locate the material I wanted to read. It meant I had access to libraries right across the globe it was wonderful and it saved me a ton of money.
  • I also got connected with some students groups and so as I explored, I had community and friends who were there.
If I was in your situation, I would do several things. I would speak with your priest to get some guidance from him and then do some research on your own. I can recommend a bunch of books if you wish, and then join when you are in graduate school. You can also investigate what types of Catholic communities are around there, and make some connections through the social media. Most student groups are connected through the social media somehow. Despite being crazy busy, you will need to take a break every now and then. You can dedicate that time to go to mass, participate inside the Catholic community that is around there, plus RCIA.

Becoming Catholic isn’t something you need to hurry with. It takes time to learn as well as time to allow God to work in your heart. Enjoy the time it takes to explore because it goes by very quickly. Trust me, I explored for two years before I joined the church.
 
xcaine11 said:
This is good to know as well. My only concern with this is that I will be entering a program in August that will be very intense and will consume 6 days a week with very dense readings and many hours spent studying.

I fear that with my busy schedule I would be more likely to neglect my religious studies to focus on academics. Ideally, I would like to utilize this free time I have right now, at least to get started. Because I currently have a very flexible part time job that would allow me to easily devote the majority of my days on the Catholic Church.

Thank you very much for your advice and I will definitely look into the university’s student ministry.
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You can certainly inquire at your local parish and see what they have to offer you.

Ideally parishes have year-round RCIA programs so that you would be able to get started. Unfortunately, many parishes fall short of the ideal and will tell you to come back in the Fall – and by then you will be living somewhere else. But it doesn’t hurt to ask!

The normal time for adults to be baptized is at the Easter Vigil, which is only a few months away. But again, perhaps you could get started.

On the other hand, if you’re going to be involved in an intense graduate program, having something else in your life might be good for you!
 
I would not usually recommend this, since I encourage potential converts to go into RCIA, but if you can find a traditional Catholic chapel usually the priest will baptize you after brief instruction in the catechism and then you can receive your first communion. I had a friend that was a constant RCIA drop-out because he moved for work so much and was becoming discouraged he would never enter the Church; so I contacted a local traditional chapel and had him talk to the priest and he was baptized three Sundays after their first meeting. Some Byzantine Catholic priests will also initiate you in the Church without going through a long process if you know the teachings of the Church. Again, I always recommend RCIA and the regular process of being initiated, but some people seem to never be able to complete the process and end up getting stuck in a kind of potential convert purgatory, if you will. I pray you enter the Church soon!!! May the Lord guide you to the right place!
 
The usual conversion procedure is called RCIA, Rite of Christian Initiation for Adults. Classes start in the fall and people receive Baptism, Confirmation, and First Communion at the Easter Vigil Mass.

I understand you have special circumstances now that you have extra time to study. You need to talk to the pastors and parishes in your area and see if they might allow you to join RCIA now and catch up or, alternatively, receive private instruction in the faith.

You can find the Catechism of the Catholic Church online and begin reading now.
 
xcaine11 said:
This is good to know as well. My only concern with this is that I will be entering a program in August that will be very intense and will consume 6 days a week with very dense readings and many hours spent studying.

I fear that with my busy schedule I would be more likely to neglect my religious studies to focus on academics. Ideally, I would like to utilize this free time I have right now, at least to get started. Because I currently have a very flexible part time job that would allow me to easily devote the majority of my days on the Catholic Church.

Thank you very much for your advice and I will definitely look into the university’s student ministry.
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O.P. - Please research “Baptism of Desire” You may find it comforting.
 
Welcome! Do you have a copy of Catholicism for Dummies? It is an excellent resource that will prepare you for, and accompany you through RCIA. It will remain a resource that you can rely on for years to come. I learn something each time I open my copy.
 
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