I went to Confession ...

[i_need_helpp]

I need helpp,
It sounds like you have a lot going on in your life: school issues, your friend in Canada, and God.

This is to you and to Vis Fati: belief is in some respects a matter of simply making a decision to belief. It’s a relationship: you show friendliness, God responds. Ask Him to show Himself to you, but understand that He usually shows Himself in subtle ways, and sometimes you won’t even notice it for a while (ok, you may notice it but I have missed it ). So, I need helpp, pray to God, ask Him to show Himself to you, talk with Him about yoir concerns.

Wrt your friend in Canada, you seem to be thinking about her a lot. This is not really a good thing; it is not a good use of your imagination. It creates a habit of retreating into what becomes almost an imaginary relationship: a relationship with a person who becomes more and more a creation of your imagination.

When I start doing that sort of thing, it is usually an indication that there is something missing in my life. It may be that I don’t have anyone who understands something I am going through; it may be that I feel like I can’t relax and let my hair down with anyone; it could be something else.

As to your schooling, it sounds like you are a junior of senior in high school? Can you ask your fuidance counselor if there are other options for you? It sounds like you did well when you were self-directed, but maybe you were focusing too much on subjects that you liked, or maybe there were subjects you couldn’t study at home. My homeschooled highschoolers take some courses at community college; that may be an option for you, or there may be some other way the guidance counselor can help you. But you really do need to focus on your studies at this time, because they are counted when you start thinking about college, or rather, when yiu want them to start thinking about you!

I hope that if the priest was helpful to you that you will be able to keep talking with him. It is really best to get help like this from someone who knows you in person, someone with whom you can have, at least from time to time, face-to-face conversations, which have a depth one cannot really attain online.

I just care for her. There’s nothing imaginary about it. If it wasn’t for her, I would’ve killed myself a while ago. She’s just my best friend.

 

[St_Francis]

I just care for her. There’s nothing imaginary about it. If it wasn’t for her, I would’ve killed myself a while ago. She’s just my best friend.

Sorry I misunderstood that parrt of your situation. This is why it’s best to go to a real-life person when you need help like this when you can. I do hope some of the rest of what I said was helpful

 

[Monte_RCMS]

I’m going to try my hardest… I just want concrete proof of the existence of God. I just to be happy with myself again, and I want to be with my best friend in Canada. I’m tired of seeking Truth – I want to find it. Wow! I’m feeling hopeless… One side wants me to believe, and the other side doesn’t want me to believe. I was a full fledged Atheist, but now I’m just wondering and questioning myself-- is there truly a God, and is religion real? I honestly don’t know anymore. I have people that say religion is just a self-motivated belief, and I have people say that Christianity is the true religion. I want to believe, but I don’t at the same time…

Confession is a means for Catholics to get forgiveness of their sins.

Confession is not a venue for spiritual direction.

There just isn’t time within the Confession “format” to get into a serious in-depth discussion.

And if there was one simple answer, then the whole process would be so simple.

[Well, on second thought … read John 6: 20-70 and ask yourself afterwards, why Jesus didn’t just tell everyone who walked away: “Just kidding”.]

If you are trying to find The Truth, then you need to start with formal Spiritual Direction … and build from there.

The Truth isn’t something you can just “demand”.

It just doesn’t work that way.

You CAN do some reading:

“Weeds Among the Wheat” by Thomas Green. Ave Maria Press

“My Daily Bread” by Anthony Paone … published by the Confraternity of the Precious Blood in Brooklyn, NY … check their Web site.

But you have to do some of the reading and then let it sink in.

You also have to pray over it.

You also have to ask who was Jesus. And then answer the question.
Last week I was at a social gathering having nothing to do with religion or spirituality.

One of the other guests brought up … out of nowhere … that we don’t know what Jesus was doing from His age of 13 until His age of 30.

We know that the Holy Family did live in Egypt for a while early on. We know there were Jewish communities in Egypt. That His friends were involved with boats. That Jesus worked as a carpenter. So, perhaps Jesus worked on building or repairing boats some of the time. Maybe he traveled to Egypt???

When I mentioned that the Shroud of Turin shows one of “the figures” arms was well-muscled … perhaps a carpenter? … the other guest stated definitely that the Shroud of Turin is a fake. *

When I raised the subject of gaps in the Old Testament accounts … the 400 years of the Jews in Egypt, for example, and how even Egyptian records don’t tell us about all of the pharaohs, the other guest said that the Church deliberately selected which books of the Bible to include so as to make Jesus look good.

When I raised the subject of books supposedly by St. Thomas, the other guest said that Jesus didn’t die on the Cross EXPERTS at executing prisoners!] , I referred to the Albigensian Heresy and that there were many books and ideas, many of which were probably written as fictional accounts because the authors were bored “Gospel of Peter” or “Gospel of Judas” (give me a break) ] … much like the accounts of Harry Potter or James Bond today.

The other guest started to get agitated, so I just smiled and headed for the refreshment table.*

 

[NonServiam]

I’m tired of seeking Truth – I want to find it. Wow! I’m feeling hopeless.

Well there’s your problem right there: you’re so wrapped up in trying to find the “Truth” – capital T, nice touch – that you’re living in a fantasy world of your own creation.

The whole idea of searching for “Truth” – in the sense that you probably mean it, some kind of ultimate meaning or “answer” that will solve all your problems and make everything all bright and happy and hunky-dory – is nothing more than a complete and total fantasy cooked up by your mind to distract you from reality.

The one and only way to overcome the tricks your brain is playing on you is to deliberately drop all of this “find the Truth” stuff: I would recommend getting a book on Zen Buddhism and learning how to sit and meditate.

In the Zen tradition, you don’t meditate to “find answers” or achieve some kind of goal: you meditate just to meditate. You sit just to sit. You breathe in, you breathe out, and you let go of all of these thoughts and worries.

Eventually, the issue of looking for the “Truth” – capital T! – will evaporate into the illusion that it always was. The truth of the matter – if you have to use that word – is the reality of your own life, your own in-and-out-breaths, this moment right here. That’s reality. The rest of it is a fantasy that will lead you to nothing more than pain in the long run.

 

[fhansen]

I’m going to try my hardest… I just want concrete proof of the existence of God. I just to be happy with myself again, and I want to be with my best friend in Canada. I’m tired of seeking Truth – I want to find it. Wow! I’m feeling hopeless… One side wants me to believe, and the other side doesn’t want me to believe. I was a full fledged Atheist, but now I’m just wondering and questioning myself-- is there truly a God, and is religion real? I honestly don’t know anymore. I have people that say religion is just a self-motivated belief, and I have people say that Christianity is the true religion. I want to believe, but I don’t at the same time…

Consider that maybe Atheism is a self-motivated belief-an unnatural one we’re all born with. It would be productive to explore why “the other side doesn’t want me to believe.” IMO humans tend to have a preference for what they want to believe-and that preference actually keeps us from God because it’s based on pride-which is related to fear of what others think of us. And so humility is a key to faith. This pride thing is universal and destructive. It’s what pits us against each other by opposing love. The Catechism states that man prefers himself to God. Just some thoughts.

 

[Monte_RCMS]

Had the thought that perhaps the OP is struggling to find “easy grace” … as in a “short cut” of some kind … because we humans are unique among creatures in having free will.

So, I looked up “easy grace”.

And, this is what emerged:

christianity.co.nz/moralit4.htm

An akin to that: today is Saturday, and today is “The Joyful Mysteries” … sort of asks and answers the question: Who is Jesus.

theholyrosary.org/joyfulmysteries

rosary-center.org/joyful.htm

The more you pray, the more you learn.

A window of understanding opens here; and, a book or an essay appears there.

So … who is Jesus?

Who or what is The Lamb of God?

And … why the cross?

 

[Monte_RCMS]

One of my friends was privileged to accompany Pope John Paul II on a visit to the Holy Land.

There were all the customary meetings and tours as befits or goes with being the head of state.

But, suddenly, the Holy Father … I suppose realizing he didn’t have much longer to live … suddenly turned and said he would like to visit the place where Jesus had been crucified.

Golgotha. Skull Place?

It was NOT part of the agenda. Not on the list of what was in the schedule.

But, … he WAS after all the Pope … and he was, in part, making a pilgrimage.

So, there would be a few minutes delay while the arrangers and escorts cleared the way. And he walked and climbed to where Jesus died that day.

And it was difficult for him, because of his age.

But he struggled and made it and then collapsed on the ground at the exact place where Jesus’ cross had stood.

And what he said later to my friend was: “Salvation is through the Cross”.

 

[Catholic80]

I’m going to try my hardest… I just want concrete proof of the existence of God. I just to be happy with myself again, and I want to be with my best friend in Canada. I’m tired of seeking Truth – I want to find it. Wow! I’m feeling hopeless… One side wants me to believe, and the other side doesn’t want me to believe. I was a full fledged Atheist, but now I’m just wondering and questioning myself-- is there truly a God, and is religion real? I honestly don’t know anymore. I have people that say religion is just a self-motivated belief, and I have people say that Christianity is the true religion. I want to believe, but I don’t at the same time…

Pride makes us want to understand before we trust and believe. “The only path to love is to trust and trust alone” - St. Therese of Lisieux
If we understood, then we wouldn’t need faith. But the more we have faith, the more we begin to understand and believe. Satan had perfect knowledge, but because he couldn’t understand the incarnation, he refused to humble himself and serve God. He basically said, ‘I don’t understand, and therefore, I will not serve.’

If we understood everything, then we wouldn’t be able to grow in love. That’s my opinion, at least.

 

[Ignatius]

I’m going to try my hardest… I just want concrete proof of the existence of God. I just to be happy with myself again, and I want to be with my best friend in Canada. I’m tired of seeking Truth – I want to find it. Wow! I’m feeling hopeless… One side wants me to believe, and the other side doesn’t want me to believe. I was a full fledged Atheist, but now I’m just wondering and questioning myself-- is there truly a God, and is religion real? I honestly don’t know anymore. I have people that say religion is just a self-motivated belief, and I have people say that Christianity is the true religion. I want to believe, but I don’t at the same time…

You know that evidence for the existence of God is not like a High School chemistry experiment right? It’s more like fourth semester Calculus where you gather what evidence you can for the hypothesis and the professor then leaves it to you to study it until you are convinced of it’s truth. No one else can convince you of it, you have to study it for a long time and work out your questions until you gain the clarity to see it.
Try reading “New Proofs for the existence of God: Contributions from Contemporary Physics and Philosophy” by Robert Spitzer, Wm.B.Eerdmans Publishing (www.eerdmans.com)

 

[paul_c]

I’m going to try my hardest… I just want concrete proof of the existence of God. I just to be happy with myself again, and I want to be with my best friend in Canada. I’m tired of seeking Truth – I want to find it. Wow! I’m feeling hopeless… One side wants me to believe, and the other side doesn’t want me to believe. I was a full fledged Atheist, but now I’m just wondering and questioning myself-- is there truly a God, and is religion real? I honestly don’t know anymore. I have people that say religion is just a self-motivated belief, and I have people say that Christianity is the true religion. I want to believe, but I don’t at the same time…

I’m worried about you so I prayed for you tonight. You have come to a place that many others have been before you. You are missing something in your life and you think it might be God. Well, it might very well be. You see, God is constantly calling to all of us. It is a natural urge to want to know him and to be with him. Follow that urge. Pray. It doesn’t have to be much. At first you might not get any response. But if you are honest about it, eventually you will start feeling his grace within you. Be patient. Know that he loves you but he will let you feel his grace in his time, not yours. Try reading the Bible. Start with the gospels. Its on line. Talk to people. use this forum. Know that people care for you and that things will work out for you in the end, if you let them. But working out may not be what you expect it to be and will probably be a whole lot better.

God Bless…

 

[Monte_RCMS]

Because you are looking for The Truth, I would suggest getting this for yourself.

It is new, but it is extremely well done and explains a lot of things.

shop.catholic.com/product.php?productid=17113&cat=0&page=1

The wonder of Creation is that each of us is built differently … and in different ways … and we, each of us, need to wrap our minds around various ideas from different directions.

So, take a look at the suggestions and ideas … and see what questions [and answers] come up as a result.

[It also appears from time to time on EWTN and on some secular stations, as well.]