I wish I could believe in God

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SugarMagnolia

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To everyone who believes in God: what a precious gift you have. I wish I could believe in God, but I don’t. One time a person told me that believing in God was a choice, but that person was dead wrong. Perhaps because she was a believer, she simply could not imagine what unbelief is like. I can choose to go to mass or say a prayer, but I can not choose what I believe.

This is what I do believe: I believe that it’s good to believe in God even if God doesn’t exist. (And I do not for a moment believe that God exists.) I believe that those who believe in God have something special that can see them through the bad times in life. I believe that God’s non-existence is irrelevant for these believers because it is their belief itself that is a good in their lives.

If I could snap my fingers and start believing in God I would do so immediately. Even knowing deep down in my heart that there is no God, no soul, no heaven, no nothing, I would still choose to believe in the fiction of God because it is a fiction that makes people’s lives better.

For all of you who believe that a life without belief in God is empty and meaningless, you are correct.
 
To disbelieve in the existence of God, firstly a person has to have enough belief to deny that existence.
So said someone very spiritual recently.

My advice is pray to the Blessed Virgin Mary to bring you closer to her Son, Jesus. This doesn’t have to be more then a single sentence of prayer as you think of it, or one or 10 Hail Mary prayers.
Faith is a gift, there is a difference in belief in something and faith. Pray for the gift of faith.
 
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It seems you want to believe but rationally can’t. Do you ever go to church? Just go to Mass some day, sit in the back and observe. After going you might want to go back and maybe you will come to believe eventually. Also pray while at Mass or anytime, read Bible and other religious writings.
 
Why do you feel certain you are correct and we believe in a fiction?
 
Thank you. I do pray to the Blessed Virgin when I am afraid plus a Hail Mary before going to sleep. I know it is a paradox. I pray even though I do not believe. I used to think this meant I had a little seed of belief and I could nurture it and make it grow, but it does not grow.
 
Allow it to grow, open that door just a little, find the desire to germinate that seed.
 
“Whoever seeks shall find”
Continue living out your faith. Surround yourself with people in a relationship with God. Study and learn and practice the faith, and you will begin to recognize the presence of God in your life.
Once, I was at a point similar to you. Deep in sadness and doubt and despair. I’m not sure if you’re Catholic, but my greatest remedy has been the sacraments. Returning to Confession after a long time enabled God to pierce my doubts. I still struggle with them, but they’re manageable and I’m able to combat them through the grace of God.
Read, participate in the sacraments, and get involved… do not distance yourself until you stop doubting
“ when you’re going through hell, keep going “
 
I did not mean stop doubting THEN don’t distance yourself… even if you’re doubting, her incolved . I noticed that was unclear.
 
Zach said:
It seems you want to believe but rationally can’t.
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This is a good way of expressing it. When times are okay, I feel like I could maybe believe a little, but when times are bad I don’t believe at all. But it’s in the bad times I need it the most!

In good times, I will sometimes sit in the church when it’s empty and quiet because it feels so lovely and peaceful. But in bad times, I feel like the universe is just material stuff with no meaning or purpose.
 
I was an atheist until a little over a year ago, and now I’m in the process of joining the Catholic church. There was a long period in my life in which I felt just like you do now, and then certain events happened that started to give me faith. You have the capacity to believe in God - you absolutely do. And I think it’s wonderful that you want so badly to believe. Keep praying, keep reflecting on God and belief, and one day, given some new event or revelation in your life, that seed may sprout. All the best!
 
I will keep trying. That is why I posted this here. Usually, I feel at home nowhere. As an unbeliever, I’m not at home with believers. But as someone who wants to believe, I’m not at home with atheists. But believers are those who already have the faith I desire, so maybe a little will rub off on me.
 
May I suggest the opposite? In the bad times, go and sit in the church. Maybe it will move you, maybe it won’t. But the silence will help you. And go to mass – even if you don’t yet believe, I have to think it would be comforting to hear folks pray for those in adversity, e.g. you.
 
Wesrock said:
Why do you feel certain you are correct and we believe in a fiction?
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That’s a good question. It’s not like someone told me an atheist argument and I found it convincing. I just stopped believing some time in my childhood. Honestly, this will sound fake, but first I stopped believing in the Easter Bunny, then Santa Claus, then God. Each one, as I got older, suddenly stopped seeming plausible.

Nowadays I have tried reading apologetics in the hope of finding a convincing argument. I read some C. S. Lewis and found him to be inspiring but not convincing.
 
I was raised Catholic. I find the church, the art, the prayers to be so beautiful and I think I am drawn to the aesthetics. For a while, I hoped that I could come for the art and stay for the God, so to speak. But beauty alone is no solace in bad times.

I try to be near believers, but not talk about my unbelief because people try to explain why I should believe and their explanations don’t work on me. But I like to observe believers and see how their belief ennobles their lives.

Thank you for this quote.
Augustine8 said:
“Whoever seeks shall find”
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I have heard it before, but forgotten it. it is indeed appropriate for me.
 
Thank you for your inspirational reply. I hope one day to find my faith. How beautiful that you are joining the church. I am a Catholic by birth, but I am only in the process of becoming a Catholic in my heart.
 
Yes, that is a good idea. Sometimes I see a few other people sitting alone and praying and I wonder if they too are going through bad times.
 
Maybe they are, or maybe they’re in thanksgiving for good times, or maybe they’re just praying for people who need help!

We have a couple prayers in the Anglican prayers of the people in which every Sunday we pray for “our families, friends, and neighbors, and for those who are alone,” and for “those who suffer from need, sorrow, sickness, or any other adversity.”

For his faults, Cranmer wielded a beautiful pen.
 
A lot of people post on this website tell how they lost their faith, left the Church for many years and eventually regained their faith and came back to the Church. I am one of them. So there is much hope. I tried for years to convince myself to believe by reading arguments and apologetics. It never worked. It was only by practicing the advice of living the faith that people in this thread are giving that I regained my faith and belief. After that the apologetics helped to strengthen my faith.
 
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I feel like my prayers are childish ones. They are not prayers of worship or thanksgiving. They are all of the “help me” variety. Because I don’t believe in heaven, I believe that this life is all there is. I think believers can cope with suffering because they believe they will be rewarded with heaven, whereas I believe suffering is just suffering.
 
That advice actually reminds me of something I learned in psychotherapy: That I can’t wait for my thoughts to change to do the things I fear; I have to do the things I fear in order for my thoughts to change. (I have an anxiety disorder.)

I have “gone through the motions” of religion before, but never kept it up. maybe it’s time for me to make another effort.
 
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