If a prior to the wedding a non-Catholic promises

[LatinCat]

askeptic:

Ah, good old Catholic family values: let’s destroy a marriage and the love between two human beings because the husband wants to present his children (who are still going to be given a Catholic education) with what he thinks about the world and God.

It doesn’t seem like he is going back on his promise. She is still going to raise them Catholics. What’s wrong with knowing what their dad believes?

I think your attitude is very destructive. My culture has a lot of negative jokes about mothers-in-law. I think the fact that you’re running to a priest to find out whether your daughter’s marriage to the man who loves her and whom she presumably loves can be destroyed is very disturbing.

Think about it reasonably. We believe in hell. Be believe that if you reject God you go to hell. The father is risking his children’s eternal salvation. That is even more important than this couple’s so called love. If the atheis husbad was this dishonest with his wife, I doubt he really loves her.

 

[LatinCat]

askeptic:

He promised to let the wife raise the kids Catholic, I don’t see how this excludes sharing his own beliefs with his children.

Surely children can be raised Catholic and still be exposed to for instance the beliefs of Muslims, Hindus, Buddhists, and agnostics. They will be exposed to these beliefs in school, by reading books, by watching television anyway. Do you propose that all these activities be controlled?

I didn’t know raising your children Catholic meant hiding the fact that other people subscribe to a different set of beliefs.

Sharing his non-Christian beliefs with his children would open them up for a possible loss of faith. Such runs completely counter to the idea of raising them Catholic. And it is different when you run into atheists at school and when one of your parents is atheist. Your parents have your love and respect so their beliefs have a greater influence on you. If the husband in this case shares his non-Christian beliefs with his children, because of his status as their father, it may confuse them about their own faith and run against the stated goal of raising the Children Catholic.

 

[ChristsSoldier]

Whoa~
This is seeming to take a decidedly non-Christian turn IMO.

For one, A non-believer can not risk what he does not believe in.

None of us have the right to question the love of a married couple we don’t know, whom have not gone against an agreement (inside our church or other wise).

Further, assuming the relationship between a husband and wife of different faiths will adversely injure anyone’s faith discounts the Holy Spirit and power of prayer and seems quite wrong to this Catholic :nope: .

As I see it, two informed adults made an agreement and it is being honored (even though they have not be blessed with children as yet) and discussing the marriages annulment is a best VERY premautre and worse very meddlesome.
Peace
CS

 

[vluvski]

I just have to point out the irony of asking about an possible annullment and then insisting rather viciously that the marriage is sacramental.

 

[dulcissima]

vluvski:

I just have to point out the irony of asking about an possible annullment and then insisting rather viciously that the marriage is sacramental.

It’s tough being a mom. Your heart can pull you in so many directions, even though all you really want it what is best for your kids. It sounds like this is what Seabird is experiencing. She loves her daughter, fears for her faith and the faith of any future grandchildren, loves her son in law who essentially has no one, and probably has some complex feelings about the impact that a non-believing spouse can have on a marriage, based upon her own childhood. Yes, she is off in all directions on this, but I think I can understand.

 

[1ke]

seabird3579:

Please do not confuse the readers: I am the mother, my Catholic daughter married a non-baptised man in the Church.

Yes, the statement should have read, “your daughter”.

seabird3579:

I have never once said I was seeking to disolve their marriage. I only seek to support my daughter spiritually and canonically.

It is interesting that you “only seek to support” your daughter by posting a question about the grounds for annulment. Since that was your original post, it was not an invalid assumption on my (or other posters’) part that it was your intention to use that knowledge to “support” her in seeking the disolution of her marriage. Why else would you ask? If you are seeking to support her in staying you would have asked a different question.

seabird3579:

Possibly in your haste to “proove” something to me, you let your dislike of me get the best of you. I forgive you.

I was not in haste to “prove” anything. *You requested * specifically a “verbatim” quote from Canon Law. I supplied one.

That I supplied what you requested is not reason to believe I dislike you. If I disliked you, I would not post to you or reply to you.

I do not dislike you, I do not know you. Really, the original post was not meant to incite you, as it obviously has, but to merely answer the questions you asked. You are reading way more into the posts here than are there.

I did not ask for your forgiveness, and I have nothing to ask forgiveness for.

seabird3579:

I know it must be difficult for those of you who are in marriages that are mixed or know someone who is, and they have a mother or mother-in-law that you consider meddling. Apparently, you’ve transferred this irritating situation to me and my situation.

I am not in a mixed marriage. I am married to a Catholic. I do not consider my own mother in law as meddling and have transfered nothing from my personal life to this situation.

I have taken what you wrote, answered your questions, and drawn conclusions from what you wrote– not from anyone esle’s situation.

seabird3579:

I love my children and I will be involved with them until I die or they die. That is what Love commands. Supporting your children takes many avenues, some will not know until they are there themselves.

I do not doubt that you love your daughter. In fact, I stated that I understand your concern.

seabird3579:

I believe the Blessed Mother was Very Involved with Jesus and His ministry.

In obedience to him, not in authority over him.

I am done here, and will cease responding to you at this point. You are clearly too emotional regarding this specific situation to have a discussion on this topic without accusing those from whom you solicited advice of having ulterior motives, misdirected angst, or some malicious dislike of you.

I wish you, and your daughter, well.