If not an altar server, what are other good services?

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hasikelee

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I have a 12yo sister who has consistently talked about a religious vocation. The family is very supportive of her and her interest has not waned throughout the years.

Now that she is getting a bit older, she wants to actively participate in the Church. Particuarly, she wants to be an altar server.

Sidestepping the girl server debate, I am simply interested in what a young teen girl can do besides serve. Our parish choir requires either 18 and up or 16 with proof of singing lessons/past experience. Our parish prolife group has activities that are far away (which makes sense as the abortion clinic is downtown) and someone in the family is not always available to drive her. The youth group is for mid-teens up to college age. (Think driving age).

I can’t think of anything else she can do, but it makes me sad to see her so enthusiastic and restless.
 
She might be able to assist at CCD, depending on the parish. It seems like there’s only one or two assistants per class at my church, though. Aside from that and being an altar server, I can’t think of anything.
 
Hi there. I’m in a somewhat similar situation to your sister as I’m fifteen and feel called to religious life. I can’t make retreats with the community I feel drawn to until I’m seventeen, and at that point I can start really talking with the vocation director, though I actually am waiting on a call from a sister who is pretty “high-up” in the “ranks” that I know well and who suggested to another sister that I have a vocation; I hope to be able to talk to her to find out what I could be doing [spiritual director maybe?] for the next two years to help nurture my vocation instead of letting it grow stagnant as I had been doing for the past few months. I am meeting in the next couple weeks with my dad with a guy from a local church about helping with catechism classes. I go to youth group occasionally, but my parents’ schedules make that difficult, and we don’t really even attend one particular church or one regular Mass time each week because of their schedules and lack of enthusiasm. I’m really just having to step up and say what I want to do, show them that it’s something positive, and slowly they are accepting my vocation and my growing into a young lady. It’s really good that your sister has such a supportive family! This will definitely help as she grows older to hold on to her vocation and preserve it; that is very important.

But as to what she can be doing to get involved, altar serving is the only thing I can think of other than helping with catechism classes. I really wanted to altar serve but then - after a lot of thinking and praying - I came to the conclusion that it just is too…non-traditional…for me. Nothing personal at all against girls who do altar serve, but now that I’ve “re-verted” to the Faith, I, like many young people today, am longing for the tradition of the Church, a lot of which slowly disappeared after Vatican II.

Altar serving, youth group, maybe you could inquire about a youth choir as I’m sure a lot of kids would be willing to do it if only the program were there for them, the pro-life thing you mentioned, maybe she could be a lector and do readings, even something as simple as bringing up the gifts or something, helping clean around the church and set up flowers or things, teaching catechism classes . . . those are the main things I can think of, but for some of these, one might have to be Confirmed. In order to help with catechism classes at the local church here, the only “qualifications” per se were to have graduated 8th grade and to have been Confirmed previously.
I hope this helps, and sorry if some of this is incoherent - long day. :yawn:
God bless and I will keep your sister and your family in my prayers!
 
Is there a Legion of Mary in your area? Sometimes they have a Junior Legion which might be just the right fit for girls that age.
 
hasikelee said:
I have a 12yo sister who has consistently talked about a religious vocation. The family is very supportive of her and her interest has not waned throughout the years.

Now that she is getting a bit older, she wants to actively participate in the Church. Particuarly, she wants to be an altar server.

Sidestepping the girl server debate, I am simply interested in what a young teen girl can do besides serve. Our parish choir requires either 18 and up or 16 with proof of singing lessons/past experience. Our parish prolife group has activities that are far away (which makes sense as the abortion clinic is downtown) and someone in the family is not always available to drive her. The youth group is for mid-teens up to college age. (Think driving age).

I can’t think of anything else she can do, but it makes me sad to see her so enthusiastic and restless.
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Besides the CCD assistant already mentioned, once she is confirmed (16 or so), she can be a Sacristan (if the position is at your parish) or even teach CCD.
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She could also be an usher at 12, she could help out with that right away.

So, as of now, encourage her to usher and be an alter server and when confirmed look at the Sacristan duties.
 
I will look into the CCD assistant idea. Also, I am trying to take her to audition for the Archdiocesan Children’s Choir. Although I know she would love to do it (our sister is in the adult choir) getting downtown every Saturday morning will be quite a feat, lol.
 
I also highly reccomend the CCD thing. I assisted in a first grade classroom (Although about eighty percent of the time, I had to teach the kids myself because the teacher didn’t know something and asked me to explain) And I seriously learned so much in that year. It was amazing.
 
Reading at Mass is always a good thing as it gives you confidence. I did my first reading at a Catholic Mass today and it actually improved my experience of the Mass because I was right next to the altar - the place for the Sacrifice. I had not given much thought to the place of the altar in the liturgy, but it suddenly dawned on me. Helping teach class for children is beneficial as well as it will get you to learn your faith better and the ability to put it into simple language and the joy you will get when a child understands and puts it into practice is most worthwhile. There are plenty of things to get involved in, in your parish; all just waiting for you to discover them. God Bless.
 
stuart12 said:
Reading at Mass is always a good thing as it gives you confidence. I did my first reading at a Catholic Mass today and it actually improved my experience of the Mass because I was right next to the altar - the place for the Sacrifice. I had not given much thought to the place of the altar in the liturgy, but it suddenly dawned on me. Helping teach class for children is beneficial as well as it will get you to learn your faith better and the ability to put it into simple language and the joy you will get when a child understands and puts it into practice is most worthwhile. There are plenty of things to get involved in, in your parish; all just waiting for you to discover them. God Bless.
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Altar serving is a much better confidence boost than reading. If your parish has a good leader or a priest who was an altar server himself, servers will usually sit off to the side at Mass and observe while the more experienced servers take care of their duties during Mass. Once they have an idea of what needs to be done they slowly take on more responsibility. Readers are put on the spotlight from Mass One, and a middle school kid is probably not going to be able to read very well, which will hurt their confidence quite a bit. I think readers at my parish have to be over 18 and auditioned by the priest.
 
hasikelee said:
I have a 12yo sister who has consistently talked about a religious vocation. The family is very supportive of her and her interest has not waned throughout the years.

Now that she is getting a bit older, she wants to actively participate in the Church. Particuarly, she wants to be an altar server.
…]
I can’t think of anything else she can do, but it makes me sad to see her so enthusiastic and restless.
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Well, to be honest, being an altar server is not properly a female role; it is (at the moment) tolerated in the Roman Church, and while encouraged by some bishops, it’s been noted that Benedict has been critical of it (tho’ not banned it, yet).

There are, however, many wonderful ministries:
Being an Usher
Being a greeter (if such is at your parish)
Feeding the Homless (doing time at the shelter, or by doing the sandwich making, etc)
Spending time with the Aged and infirm.
Adoration of the Blessed Sacrament
Altar Linens, church cleaning, Vestment cleaning, Cassock repairing - The Altar society often does these… if so, join.
Jr. Legion of Mary

Preparation for the religious life need not be entirely church-centered, and probably should not be so. It must be Christ-centered, but can be in the world as well as the parish.
Now, with her youth, that does limit the options… but I’m certain running a vacuum or pushing a broom is possible and would be a welcome aid.
 
Don’t ushers need to have a criminal background check and be full adults first? I know that my parish does not take volunteers to be ushers since they have to handle parish money.
 
I don’t get it. Why in the heck would it matter what age someone is to sing??? In my church anyone is welcome we need singers!!! Move to Huron SD Holy Trinity would love to have her!!! All kidding aside. try talking to the music director, Maybe she can learn the organ we certainly need organists nice to see younger people learning to bring back the traditional organ. I am a musician and I am learning the instrument myself to serve since priesthood is out. I would talk to the priest and about your plight. maybe he can swing the music director’s decision to allow her in for she is discerning a call to the religious life. If the priest has a personallity of leadership he can diplomatically (sp?) make room for her. If the music director is the pianist maybe God wants her to help out with that? don’t know. God Bless Scoob.
 
scoobydoo6v92 said:
I don’t get it. Why in the heck would it matter what age someone is to sing???
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If a child’s voice is still developing and they have not been properly trained in how to use it they can cause damage to their voice etc by singing a lot/for extended periods in choirs/other groups. Maybe they just want to wait until their voices are settled and they’ve had time to learn how to use it properly.
 
hasikelee said:
I have a 12yo sister who has consistently talked about a religious vocation. The family is very supportive of her and her interest has not waned throughout the years.

Now that she is getting a bit older, she wants to actively participate in the Church. Particuarly, she wants to be an altar server.

Sidestepping the girl server debate, I am simply interested in what a young teen girl can do besides serve. Our parish choir requires either 18 and up or 16 with proof of singing lessons/past experience. Our parish prolife group has activities that are far away (which makes sense as the abortion clinic is downtown) and someone in the family is not always available to drive her. The youth group is for mid-teens up to college age. (Think driving age).

I can’t think of anything else she can do, but it makes me sad to see her so enthusiastic and restless.
Click to expand...
Thats great. Dont just think of ministries that are already organized. I had no idea until this week, after being a parishioner in this parish for 12 years, that there are a few people who regularly wipe the pughs down with some chemical which keeps the wood from drying out and cracking. She could also keep the adoration chapel clean and tidy, if yall have one. Maybe help her organize visits to the nursing home with children her age. Does your parish have vacation bible school for young children where she could help ?
 
snhs said:
If a child’s voice is still developing and they have not been properly trained in how to use it they can cause damage to their voice etc by singing a lot/for extended periods in choirs/other groups. Maybe they just want to wait until their voices are settled and they’ve had time to learn how to use it properly.
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I suppose it depends at what level the choir, itself, is and what demands are being made of them. If it is more of a professional level of serious singers, I can see your point. But for the average parish choir, not necessarily so. A good choir director ought to be able to both train and not strain the voices he has to work within their limits.

I’m a pretty decent vocalist. But most of my best training came by the time I was 16. If anything, I would RECOMMEND people getting an early start on learning vocal technique, as it will offer them the proper fundamentals as a foundation for future growth in singing well and with quality. There is no reason why children can’t do that.
 
chicago said:
I suppose it depends at what level the choir, itself, is and what demands are being made of them. If it is more of a professional level of serious singers, I can see your point. But for the average parish choir, not necessarily so. A good choir director ought to be able to both train and not strain the voices he has to work within their limits.

I’m a pretty decent vocalist. But most of my best training came by the time I was 16. If anything, I would RECOMMEND people getting an early start on learning vocal technique, as it will offer them the proper fundamentals as a foundation for future growth in singing well and with quality. There is no reason why children can’t do that.
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Two criteria though, good and choir director. I think it is slightly different in the U.S. but for the most part the people running choirs are volunteers and are musicians/have a musical background of some description. Sometimes they may be only slightly more competent than some of the choir at others they’ll have a few armfuls of certificates, diplomas, doctorates and masters degrees in choir directing. If they weren’t all that confident I’d certainly understand them erring on the side of caution rather than taking risks with children’s voices.

Learning the technique is important obviously, but it may be difficult to fit enough of that in to bring people up to speed and although they may be able to supervise them during choir practice they’re not going to know whether they’re straining their voices at home by not doing a proper warm up etc.
 
PBP said:
Thats great. Dont just think of ministries that are already organized. I had no idea until this week, after being a parishioner in this parish for 12 years, that there are a few people who regularly wipe the pughs down with some chemical which keeps the wood from drying out and cracking. She could also keep the adoration chapel clean and tidy, if yall have one. Maybe help her organize visits to the nursing home with children her age. Does your parish have vacation bible school for young children where she could help ?
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This is said warmly…not offensively…

Our church has a little cleaning group, too. Hahaha, we are NOT welcome as we are under the age of senior. 😃

One time, Father mentioned a certain date to clean for Christmas. So I showed up with some teens/preteens in tow, ready to clean. Then this little group of old ladies showed up. They had buckets, rags, extenders, etc. They came with a determined look upon their face haha. They practically booted us out of church. I think one woman growled at my brother when he offered to fill her bucket. :rotfl:

We leave the cleaning to the old ladies now.
 
snhs said:
Two criteria though, good and choir director. I think it is slightly different in the U.S. but for the most part the people running choirs are volunteers and are musicians/have a musical background of some description. Sometimes they may be only slightly more competent than some of the choir at others they’ll have a few armfuls of certificates, diplomas, doctorates and masters degrees in choir directing. If they weren’t all that confident I’d certainly understand them erring on the side of caution rather than taking risks with children’s voices.

Learning the technique is important obviously, but it may be difficult to fit enough of that in to bring people up to speed and although they may be able to supervise them during choir practice they’re not going to know whether they’re straining their voices at home by not doing a proper warm up etc.
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I think this is trying to be “too” cautious. I mean, we aren’t talking about having a nine year old throwing curve balls at full throttle. Admittedly, some choir directors try to get more out of the adult voices than they are capable of. If the choristers knew anything (and weren’t so proud as to think that they are better than they really are), they’d object. For typical songs, a child should be able to sing along quite competently, however. Especially if the congregation is expected to sing with the choir on most selections.

As to warm ups and techniques, just start with such at any choir rehearsal. It likely ought to be done, anyway. No, one can’t assure that ANY vocalist (youth or adult) will warm up properly on their own time. But using such as an excuse to not have children as part of a choir is a cheap excuse. Maybe the choir director doesn’t want to have to deal with kids and discipline. Or he doesn’t want to work. if this is the case, then he should outright get fired as he probably isn’t good for the choir or music program as a whole.
 
It’s not like most choirs do this Sanctus.

Oh wait, children can sing that one, can’t they (albeit with training).
 
what about young boy’s choirs? I am a musician and I have seen so many family bluegrass bands that have their young children sing and they do fine. I feel that this director may not want to have young kids for whatever reason. With proper training and time I am sure a 9 year old can sing iwth training. No matter how young or how old ou start singing, improper singing will hurt your voice plain and simple. My advice is to see if she would be interested in piano and organ… we certainly need organists and musicians,THere is a Benedictine (sp?) abbey in Yankton SD that has a beautiful organ that the nuns play!! I don’t know just an idea. Scoob.
 
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