If the world hates you, you probably deserve it

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What interests me is why was the question asked about it being so important to be loved in this world by others. Should this be the main priority?

some random thoughts:
I’ve read that all souls, if we could really see each other, are unspeakably beautiful.

Who is the prince of this world - and if the conclusions his citizens are drawing are the ones we’re believing - maybe we need to think about what the Prince of peace says.

I’m very sorry you’ve had an experience of being hated. No one should experience hatred.
 
Yes, but He still has His followers.
I think OP means if you have a 0% approval rating you’re probably doing something wrong…
 
goodcatholic said:
If this thread can promote discussion of the original Gospel verse, good. “If the world hated you, remember that it hated me first.” He wanted to encourage those that were being persecuted for following him, to my knowledge.
If in this modern day, you are being persecuted for being Christian, then no, you don’t deserve it. But if you feel the world isn’t loving you enough, shouldn’t you be asking yourself: “How am I coming across? Maybe it is my fault.”
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Yes, people love others because they perceive they are being loved by someone worth loving. Christ, in contrast, loves because it is the nature of God to love all people, because all people were made to be worthy of love. We have to perceive that others are made in the image and likeness of God. That is what makes someone worth loving on a supernatural plane, on the plane of reality. On the plane of limited human vision, people love when there is something in it for them. If you want them to love you, then yes, you have to pony up and give them someone whose company they enjoy. To be fair, people want to feel they are loved before they dare to love, too. They want to know you care about them and that they won’t be spending their affections on someone who returns nothing.
 
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While I agree with the premise that one can often influence how others perceive him/her - and change it, I don’t think it is a given that one can always make another like him.

A Jew in 1930s/40s in Eastern Europe was not going to change the hatred no matter what he/she did.

In any society, it seems that there are some that are going to judge any minority before they personally know an individual from that minority.

There will always be some that don’t like you because you are tall or thin or fat or a woman - or a man - too old, too young - too beautiful - too ugly - too successful - not successful enough - because you are gay - or too religious - because you are in management - or a union - because your skin is darker or lighter - your eyes are slanted - your nose too big, your teeth are not straight or white enough.

But if you have multiple opportunities to be with people (as were you as a teacher) - your approach may allow others to change their mind. You can study what makes others more popular or more successful and see if you are able to adopt any of those features into your own life.
 
A teacher who phones it in and is unfair is going to be hated, yes. But I’ve seen teachers who clearly care and are enthusiastic be hated by a few. Folks can have a statistical impact on how they are received and treated by new individuals, but they can’t control it.

All have sinned and fall short…so from one perspective we all deserve it. But God sends sun and rain upon both the good and the bad, so from another we don’t.
 
My problem with the OP’s thesis is that it sets up ‘the world’ as the final arbiter of a person’s worth. In other words, I deserve to be hated since the world hates me. Implied in this statement is the perfect and reasonable judgment of the world. Unfortunately, things are just the opposite. If the world hates you, most likely you DON’T deserve it. However, our deserts are neither here nor there. Deserved or not, the world’s scorn should be a source of joy to us, as it means we are going against the miserable fallen state of mankind. C.S. Lewis said that a true Christian believer should always be uncomfortable in the world, since the world has rejected Christ and is given over to sin of every conceivable sort.

‘Child, do not be troubled if you see others honored and exalted, and yourself despised and humiliated. Lift up your heart to heaven, to me, and the slights of other persons will not grieve you.’
  • From The Imitation of Christ, Book III, Chapter 41
 
Thinking about this, I have never personally encountered a single person who hates Jesus. I have, on the other hand, encountered many people who hate Christians.
 
kill051 said:
C.S. Lewis said that a true Christian believer should always be uncomfortable in the world, since the world has rejected Christ and is given over to sin of every conceivable sort.
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Thanks for your (name removed by moderator)ut and I have read a lot of Lewis recently.
So that does that mean all the nerdish social misfits who are Christian should feel glad? And never learn to develop their communication style to try and fit into the world?
 
I apologize to anyone of color, gays, ethnicity, or minority group who is persecuted for just being themselves. That was never my intent. I will learn not to present such provocative titles in future.
 
I think the OP is conflating two things that are not the same. To be an unsuccessful teacher who has missed his calling is one thing. Students may dislike you if you are a bad teacher. Some of course will e even dislike you if you are a great teacher–that’s the way it is.
But the OP is comparing his experience as a teacher to Jesus’ admonition that the world will hate us for being his disciples. That’s a completely different thing. Anyone who follows Christ sincerely today is going to be disparaged, mocked, shunned, even killed in certain places.
I’m not getting how the two things relate.
 
goodcatholic said:
Thanks for your (name removed by moderator)ut and I have read a lot of Lewis recently.
So that does that mean all the nerdish social misfits who are Christian should feel glad? And never learn to develop their communication style to try and fit into the world?
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Hmmm…in one way, that’s a good question, but in another, it reveals the self-image of the questioner. When you call yourself a ‘social misfit’, I wonder exactly what you mean. Society is comprised of so many different types of person, I can’t really see it as the sort of homogenous monolith you seem to imply that it is. Rather than trying to fit in to this monolith that looms before you, have you tried seeking out other ‘nerdish misfits’ that share your particular idiosyncrasies? There would be a ready-made society into which you could fit, right there. As far as trying to fit in to the world, render unto Caesar, but also unto the Lord. I don’t think we have to necessarily evince the sort of contempt for the ruling powers that cost John the Baptist his head, but neither should we be overly concerned about ‘fitting in’. Again, I get the strong feeling that underlying this question of conformation to the world and its priorities is a misguided elevation of worldly concerns that will only make you unhappy in the long run, since those concerns, being based as they are on a bedrock of shifting sands, will constantly shift and change, keeping you on the run in your attempt to fit in. I would advise forgetting about ‘the world’ and seeking others who are congenial companions, and setting up your own world with them.
 
kill051 said:
is a misguided elevation of worldly concerns that will only make you unhappy in the long run, since those concerns, being based as they are on a bedrock of shifting sands, will constantly shift and change, keeping you on the run in your attempt to fit in. I would advise forgetting about ‘the world’ and seeking others who are congenial companions, and setting up your own world with them.
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Good insight and thanks for taking the time to respond so thoughtfully. Ideally I am a person who is not status conscious, has no concern over whether I was a success in my secular life and doesn’t give a hoot what others think of me. Merton calls this the false self by the way. The authentic or real self doesn’t care. But I still have to live with the part of me that does care. And does remember. I sometimes worry if I impacted those kids’ lives in a negative way and affected their self-esteem for the worse. Just pray they turned out OK.
I’m 60 now. For a person my age, it would be nice to look back on a long successful, happy career. But the very opposite is true. I feel ashamed of that. And when I meet my family (siblings) at reunions, I am painfully aware of it. Most of my siblings did either well in business or in their careers.
again thanks for posts.
 
Unfortunately sibling rivalry happens whether one is a success or not a success.
Many if not most of us look back at some things in our lives with regret. The best advice that of St. Paul who deeply regretted his own past before he knew Christ but could only conclude that he had to forget the past and push forward to finish the race in the “surpassing light of Christ.”
 
Maybe the kids never hated you. they just didn’t like your style of teaching?
 
thanks for replying Margaret. Yes I’ve come to terms with that now. It wasn’t personal. I didn’t have the skills required for teaching, which included good voice modulation and how to engage an audience. Should have attended toastmasters perhaps.
 
possibly. well I have that too. so yeah I should have sought out their help.
 
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