Thank you James. I think I am going to have to practice patience on this one and wait for the Lord to as you put it ‘grant’ me understanding. I am going to pray to Saint Thomas too. Many saints understood it clearly, but, I don’t…
Well, Socrates said that patience is a virtue; maybe that’s it, Our Lord wants me to develop this virtue a bit more.

Let me tell you, I most certainly need to work on this virtue.
I was just searching ‘suffer’ in the Bible, read a lot of interesting things but still nothing. One of these days with the Grace of God the veil will drop. It looks like it may just take the veil dropping for me to understand this one, but, Our Lord helps many stupid people. I can be a witness to that as once at Confession, I realized something with the Grace of God and I just thought as I walked away; how could I be so blind and stupid as not to have seen this before nor recognized it. Our Lord took down a veil for me and I was able to see clearer. Maybe that is what will happen with this one. I just want to understand so that I will know and also because it will permit me to appreciate sacrifice, etc…
I hope is not something bad that I am doing or some inclinations of mine that are forbidding me to understand. I have seen in some people an inability to understand or accept a teaching caused by their own earthly attachments, personal desires and self love. I hope this is not the situation for me and it is just that somehow I just need to wait and develop other understandings…etc…
Sorry to ramble…
Peace,
Abba
Abba,
I know about rambling…believe me…So there is no need to apologize.
I think that part of the problem for many of us is that we try too hard to understand things through our logical, linear, rational thought paradigm. We want to have answers fit to a, “If…then…”, style of understanding. Unfortunately God’s ways are not our ways, and so these things don’t always fit our nice neat desire for “logical flow”…
Just as an example, you mention receiving a grace, an understanding, as you were leaving confession. When it hit, and you understood, it seemed so simple.
But I’ll bet that I can tell you something about this that might fit what we ar talking about here.
When you received the grace, the understanding, it hit you in an instant and the various pieces that you had been considering instantly fell into place. All of this took far less time than it took me to type this short post. BUT - I’ll bet that if you tried to “explain” your new understanding it would require much time to compose and probably several paragraphs.
The reason for this is because you would be trying to explain “logically” what God granted to you mystically. Our Logic, and our Language, is so limited (by our human intellect) that it is not always up to the task of adequately explaining in many words, what God can impart with a single breath.
I can only image how frustrated Jesus must have been with us. He spent three years and who knows how many words - lessons and parables and actions - all in an effort to explain that it’s all about Love…
Maybe that’s why He still suffers…Not for our “sins” in the objective sense, but that we, even after 2000 years, just don’t seem to
get it. Maybe his suffering isn’t from the wounds of the cross so much as from :banghead: and :doh2: over our stiff necks and mental density…
Maybe not…
Long story short, you already have experience with waiting for enlightenment. So you know what I mean. Just keep praying, and studying, and asking. But don’t try too hard to “organize it”. Just put the info in, place it before the Lord, and let him get back to you in His time.
Peace
James