I'm a little scared

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allcatholic546

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Hi, I am sort of embaraced to say this… but I am a little scared to go to confession. I mean, in church and around my priest I put on this mask showing that I am a nice person, but by going to confession I am sort of showing him my bad side- wich is not a side I really want him to see. Any ideas on how I could feel better on recieving this sacrament?
 
You are in good company! We are all sinners – every single one of us. This includes priests. They also go to confession on a regular basis (at least they are supposed to). There is not a sin they have not heard. I think most priests have more respect for those who regularly confess their sins than those who do not. It shows that you are working on the call we all have for holiness.

And remember, the priest is an instrument of Our Lord whenever he is conveying a sacrament. He is working “In the Person of Christ,” so it is Jesus to whom you are confessing your sins and your willingness to repent, and He already knows your sins, He’s just waiting for you to ask forgiveness so he can shower His Mercy upon you!
 
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allcatholic546:
Hi, I am sort of embaraced to say this… but I am a little scared to go to confession. I mean, in church and around my priest I put on this mask showing that I am a nice person, but by going to confession I am sort of showing him my bad side- wich is not a side I really want him to see. Any ideas on how I could feel better on recieving this sacrament?
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Consider each of these three ways to view confession.
  1. You go to a doctor(priests), take off you clothes (masks), tell him your problems (sins), and let him heal you (penance & absolution). Does the doctor treat you any differently as a person because of the illness? I hope not. Should the priest? I hope not.
  2. A purifying shower washing any the dirt of sin, leaving you feeling clean all over.
  3. Jesus is wearing a disguise to look just like your priest and is sitting in the chair across from you really wanting to help you in the sacrament of confession.
You can if you wish go behind a screen or go to a priest who does not know you. You may find however that using the same priest for confession, one who knows you, allows him to help you more.

I have never noticed a difference in how a priest treats me after I have gone to him in confession.
 
I’ve had two priests tell me that the Holy Spirit takes away all memory of confessions after they leave the confessional. That’s extremely comforting to me. 🙂
 
I do not mean to belittle your fear, but perhaps just put it into perspective. Mortal sin deprives our souls of Sanctifying Grace. If we die in such a state, we go to Hell, we do not pass “Go”, we do not get second chances. Without a doubt, if we are in a state of Mortal sin, we should be deathly afraid every waking minute, for if we were to die (and we know neither the time nor the place of our death, but our last moment may be at any time), without having received Confession, we would spend eternity in Hell.

The very thought of Hell should send Catholics running for the confessional. What is embarrasment next to eternal damnation? T.A. Stobie draws the correlation between confession and medicine, and it is a very good analogy. We might not like to take the pill that the doctor prescribes, but if we do not, we shall die.

That being said, far from being something that we fear, Confession and God’s forgiveness through the ministry of the Church is what protects us from a fate worse than death.

On another note, priests have heard it all, and from everyone. Be mindful as Didi mentioned that they act in persona Christi, and trust the priest to keep the Seal of the Confessional.
 
ONe thing that has helped me in confession is my efforts to be “real” or authentic in the rest of my life. I lived for too long in a lie. Trying to please everyone in the effort to be accepted by them. And starting at the age of seven, I was depressed. And I learned early that no one reallly cares what you (at least, that was my impression at the time) so I learned to plaster on a smile and fake it. That only brought on more misery.

So, out with the fake, and on to the life that GOD is directing me to.
 
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allcatholic546:
Hi, I am sort of embaraced to say this… but I am a little scared to go to confession. I mean, in church and around my priest I put on this mask showing that I am a nice person, but by going to confession I am sort of showing him my bad side- wich is not a side I really want him to see. Any ideas on how I could feel better on recieving this sacrament?
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It’s okay to be embarrassed or scared. It’s just a feeling. Feelings are neither good nor bad. Of course around the Priest and Church you’re nice – there is little reason to be otherwise! Try going behind the screen, but by all means GO!!! And, while you’re behind the screen, share your feelings of embarrassment and fear. It will make it easier facing those things. Your discomfort may not be about the Priest, it’s may be about the Holy Spirit prodding you about your sins, to convert, to change, to turn more towards the Lord.
 
When I was growing up, my dad had an album of comedy routines. In one of them, one guy, who is clearly drunk, calls a liquor store. After requesting a long list of alcohol, the clerk says “That’s quite an order. Are you having a party?” The man replies, “No. I’m just trying to work up the nerve to go to confession.” It was hilarious. So when I was getting ready to go after being away for 15+ years, I kept remembering that comedy routine. I realized if there was a comedy routine regarding confession, it was obviously a real issue and that I was normal for feeling the way I did. Am I making any sense? Any way, I hope this helps. I’m not trying to make confession seem like a joke, just trying to help you get there.
Maggie
 
Would this be the FIRST confession of yours in a long time?

Does your priest know you “personally”?

If he doesnt know you personally, dont sweat it. If you have developed a relationship with him and are feeling embarrassment, the best thing to do is go to another parish and confess to a priest that doesnt know ya from adam…once you have confessed sins that made you too ashamed to go to one who knows you… dont sweat going to your parish priest afterwards…MANY people use other priests at parishes they dont attend when they/we/I fall into whoppers and are known by our parish priests… The main point is, you go to confession and get ABSOLVED by a priest…ANY priest. I hate to admit, but I’ve done this as well… imagine our poor priests! I dont know if a priest must divulge in confession if he is a priest…or if they have mandated confessors…but even if I were a priest…and fell hard…I’d be going as ANONMOUS if I were allowed to do so. :o
 
We are all in the same boat. We all do things that we are ashamed of and dont want to admit to anyone. However keep in mind that you are telling someone who already knows your secrets and can see inside of your heart. That person is the Lord. YOu are just telling Him that you are so sorry for what you have done and will try to not fail Him in the future. Go to another parish and confess. This is too important to just wait and wait to do. You should go to confession at the next possible chance. God will give you the courage, you just have to pour out your heart.
 
Christy Beth:
So, out with the fake, and on to the life that GOD is directing me to.
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I think you are very wise and that I can learn from you.

There are some sins that I am not at this time able to confess. How do I deal with that? General absolution?
 
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Anonymous:
There are some sins that I am not at this time able to confess. How do I deal with that? General absolution?
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No, you have a problem then. You are required to confess all mortal sins when you go to confession. If you keep some of them unconfessed, this invalidates the confession.

Talk over this problem of not being able to confess some sins with a priest.
Do it soon. Remember that Christ can come like a thief in the night.

I am praying for God to grant you the grace to overcome your reluctance to confess these sins.
 
T.A.Stobie:
No, you have a problem then. You are required to confess all mortal sins when you go to confession. If you keep some of them unconfessed, this invalidates the confession.

Talk over this problem of not being able to confess some sins with a priest.

Do it soon. Remember that Christ can come like a thief in the night.

I am praying for God to grant you the grace to overcome your reluctance to confess these sins.
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I did confess to my parish priest that I was unable to divulge all of my sins. I was able to tackle a few biggies thanks be to God. I am really working on it and your post adds to my desire to do so.

Thanks a lot, T.A. Stobie, SFO.
 
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Anonymous:
There are some sins that I am not at this time able to confess. How do I deal with that? General absolution?
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Why not? Seriously, why can’t you confess? And how do you deal with that??? By dealing with it. And this is good that you’re able to at least say it to someone, even though we don’t know one another. You haven’t committed any sin that countless people down through the ages have committed. If you are not confessing because you’re still committing it, forget any kind of absolution.

General absolution is not valid for mortal sin. If you’re talking a Church that gives communal penance with no individual confession, this is not valid for mortal sin, you must still go to individual confession.

I’ll be praying that the Holy Spirit gives you courage and convicts you of your sins that you may go as soon as possible. I recall one sin in particular that I kept hiding from, knew it was wrong, was justifying it, was not ready to give it up, too embarrassed to confess, felt helpless. I ended up confessing all of that, even the helplessness. Wow, what a great Priest encouraged and comforted me!!! Confession is part of the journey of our faith, that’s why the more often you go the more triumphs and victories over yourself you realize. Practice makes perfect!
 
My former parish priest is a close personal friend of mine. I have known him all my life, he baptized me was there for my confirmation. He even said the funerals for my grand parents and my mom. I say that because he heard my confession every two weeks and let me say that he has heard some big ones in the past. He has never stopped being my friend or said anything belittling. The moment I walk in to the confessional I lose all fear because I know it is God who I am confessing to and he already knows my sins so what do I have to lose by telling him what he already knows. Oh he is former parish priest because I had to move to another city due to my job.
 
Ivi,
General absolution is not valid for mortal sin. If you’re talking a Church that gives communal penance with no individual confession, this is not valid for mortal sin, you must still go to individual confession.
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Source?

I don’t believe that is correct, general absolution has the same effect as regular confession, however, it is only licitly given in a case on necessity, such as before battle, or on an airplane that is crashing etc, when there is not sufficient time to hear individual confessions.
 
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Ivi:
If you are not confessing because you’re still committing it, forget any kind of absolution.

I’ll be praying that the Holy Spirit gives you courage and convicts you of your sins that you may go as soon as possible. I recall one sin in particular that I kept hiding from, knew it was wrong, was justifying it, was not ready to give it up, too embarrassed to confess, felt helpless. I ended up confessing all of that, even the helplessness. Wow, what a great Priest encouraged and comforted me!!! Confession is part of the journey of our faith, that’s why the more often you go the more triumphs and victories over yourself you realize. Practice makes perfect!
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I sincerely appreciate it, Ivi. You are right.

Peace.
 
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